Jesus can help your bedroom technique

WilyCoyote · 08-01-2014 07:58PM #1

If Jesus is the answer - what is the question? At long last we know. After all, He was taught by Mary Magdalene ........ and she had an excellent CV in Horizontal Studies

http://www.independent.ie/world-news/jesus-can-make-you-a-better-lover-commuters-told-29900058.html

TeddyTedson · 08-01-2014 08:00PM

Did god technically rape Mary considering? Did she consent before being impregnated?

Sin City · 08-01-2014 08:03PM

Take that atheists

Sir Arthur Daley · 08-01-2014 08:04PM

Daqster · 08-01-2014 08:08PM

Sin City wrote: »

Take that atheists

Slipknot or the likes I'd suspect, but Take That??

Sin City · 08-01-2014 08:43PM

Daqster wrote: »

Slipknot or the likes I'd suspect, but Take That??

Slipknot?? What are you12?

wazky · 08-01-2014 08:44PM

'Hon the Jesus lad.

Fr_Dougal · 08-01-2014 08:54PM

Coming Soon...to a mass near you...

Rabelais · 08-01-2014 09:03PM

Mood lighting, a few drinks and Dusty Springfield playing over the speakers can help your bedroom technique.

D-FENS · 08-01-2014 09:10PM

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Did god technically rape Mary considering? Did she consent before being impregnated?

Blurred lines, he knew she wanted it

gjc · 08-01-2014 09:11PM

ohh jesus....ohh jesus....ohh jesus........OHHH JESUSS!!!

Kettleson · 08-01-2014 09:13PM

gjc wrote: »

ohh jesus....ohh jesus....ohh jesus........OHHH JESUSS!!!

Blessed is he who cums in the name of the Lord.

wazky · 08-01-2014 09:14PM

gjc wrote: »

ohh jesus....ohh jesus....ohh jesus........OHHH JESUSS!!!

Have you ever felt Jesus deep within you?

gjc · 08-01-2014 09:16PM

Kettleson wrote: »

Blessed is he who cums in the name of the Lord.

also

blessed is he amongst women........I notice that is plural

Muise... · 08-01-2014 09:27PM

OP, leave Mary Madgalene alone. :mad:

What little historical evidence there is about her points to a very educated and wealthy woman, who was a disciple of Jesus equal to the others, even developed philosophy and wrote a gospel... until the split of course, then she had to be deliberately mixed up with other Marys (there were a lot of Marys in the ME back then) and rebranded as the original tart with a heart.

papu · 08-01-2014 09:29PM

slow news day?

WilyCoyote · 08-01-2014 09:45PM

Muise... wrote: »

OP, leave Mary Madgalene alone. :mad:

What little historical evidence there is about her points to a very educated and wealthy woman, who was a disciple of Jesus equal to the others, even developed philosophy and wrote a gospel... until the split of course, then she had to be deliberately mixed up with other Marys (there were a lot of Marys in the ME back then) and rebranded as the original tart with a heart.

Interesting. Can you post a link? Have always wanted to have my toes fondled by a long haired temptress

Muise... · 08-01-2014 09:54PM

WilyCoyote wrote: »

Interesting. Can you post a link? Have always wanted to have my toes fondled by a long haired temptress

off the top of a google search: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/history-archaeology/magdalene.html

The kissing referred to in the article could be down to mouth-kisses being standard between men as well as men and women and women and women in that culture at that time - Judas' betrayal was signified by a kiss - or it could be a later Gnostic symbol for the passing of spiritual truth between people.

WilyCoyote · 11-01-2014 02:25AM

Muise... wrote: »

off the top of a google search: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/history-archaeology/magdalene.html

The kissing referred to in the article could be down to mouth-kisses being standard between men as well as men and women and women and women in that culture at that time - Judas' betrayal was signified by a kiss - or it could be a later Gnostic symbol for the passing of spiritual truth between people.

Muise, thank you for that. An excellent synopsis. A lady of many talents

liliq · 11-01-2014 02:26AM

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

Coming Soon...to a mass near you...

^^^perfect.

southcentralts · 11-01-2014 04:51AM

Not relying on INSERT SPAM EMAIL PRODUCT HERE will do equally well though, but for best results don't turn mid-coitus to ask Jesus for commentary. You may just get engaged in a parable about not entering a frequently used tunnel on the road to Jerusalem.

Jesus can help your bedroom technique

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