Why is 30s considered old??

Potatoeman · 08-10-2013 08:07AM

Adamantium wrote: »

I'm no white knight, but boy do they sound like dickheads, was that his first, best chat up line?, he sounds like a profound creative genius, incredibly insightful, giving Groucho Marx a run for his money :rolleyes:

Tone is lost in text chat. I'd say he was looking for talking points by looking at the profile. Thirty is just that age where people question where your life is going. If you want kids its the time you have to make serious choices.

Rubylolz · 09-10-2013 12:31AM

30 isnt old!... sit back enjoy life an take it all in your stride!... be grateful for all you have an dont let anybody's negative speechs drag you down! 'We're here for a good time not a long time'

seachto7 · 09-10-2013 01:34AM

I'm 36 and in a college class full of 22/23 year olds. How do you think I feel!!

Gannicus · 09-10-2013 03:07PM

Sally_1981 wrote: »

I'm trying internet dating too and I was chatting to a 27 year old which is not that young in comparison but the slagging starts regarding the age. Even though he contacted me but I didn't continue the conversation with the person.

This fella was obviously a gimp or was trying to act brave as he was on the internet. I'm 27 myself and I would have no problem chatting to or dating someone older/younger than myself provided we had chemistry. 31 is by no means old. I wouldn't consider below retirement age old in this day and age (no pun itended).

Chin up and don't take too much out of one bad experience.

Potatoeman · 09-10-2013 06:02PM

Rubylolz wrote: »

30 isnt old!... sit back enjoy life an take it all in your stride!... be grateful for all you have an dont let anybody's negative speechs drag you down! 'We're here for a good time not a long time'

http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html

This is pretty interesting. One important point raised is that comments like that make it okay to procrastinate from important life choices. If you want kids you need to plan for it. Not just women either, even if your a guy would you want to be 60 when your kids moves out?

The_Conductor · 13-10-2013 10:46AM

Potatoeman wrote: »

If you want kids you need to plan for it. Not just women either, even if your a guy would you want to be 60 when your kids moves out?

I'll be 40 next birthday. I've a 2 and a 3 year old. I'll probably be the guts of 60 before they move out. Whats the big deal? Its not like I'll be in my 70s. And I certainly will be planning on retiring at this stage- I don't see that its an issue?

Susie564 · 13-10-2013 03:35PM

Potatoeman wrote: »

http://www.ted.com/talks/meg_jay_why_30_is_not_the_new_20.html

This is pretty interesting. One important point raised is that comments like that make it okay to procrastinate from important life choices. If you want kids you need to plan for it. Not just women either, even if your a guy would you want to be 60 when your kids moves out?

I wish I'd seen that ten years ago! I'm 32 now and starting to accept that I probably won't have a family of my own now. Which I'm kind of ok with anyway. I wish I'd paid more attention to this aspect of my life in my twenties - I had other stuff going on - my mum died when I was 20 and I had illness of my own to contend with from my mid twenties until quite recently - but still if I were to go back and do my twenties again I would definitely do things differently.

ireland.man · 13-10-2013 04:55PM

It also depends on what country you're in. I know when I'm in the States I feel a lot older being in my early 30s than say in France. I think the expectations for people to act and be at a certain 'stage' in life widely vary depending on the culture, to state the obvious.

In Ireland I think people put a lot of pressure on each other, maybe it's an insecurity thing and they need validation for their own life choices. If you want kids, or have certain goals about finishing paying a mortgage by a certain age, etc, then yes, you should pay attention to your age but everything else is relative.

Picture the amount of people out there who wouldn't be in massive debt or have mortgages on over-priced homes if they had only NOT adhered to others' expectations of them!

Potatoeman · 13-10-2013 06:38PM

The_Conductor wrote: »

I'll be 40 next birthday. I've a 2 and a 3 year old. I'll probably be the guts of 60 before they move out. Whats the big deal? Its not like I'll be in my 70s. And I certainly will be planning on retiring at this stage- I don't see that its an issue?

It depends on the individual but the older you are the less energy you will have and the more likely you are suffer from illness. Your going to be dealing with teenagers in your late fifties.

Potatoeman · 13-10-2013 06:41PM

Susie564 wrote: »

I wish I'd seen that ten years ago! I'm 32 now and starting to accept that I probably won't have a family of my own now. Which I'm kind of ok with anyway. I wish I'd paid more attention to this aspect of my life in my twenties - I had other stuff going on - my mum died when I was 20 and I had illness of my own to contend with from my mid twenties until quite recently - but still if I were to go back and do my twenties again I would definitely do things differently.

You still have time, you just need to factor in what you consider to be the timeframe for you to meet someone and settle down. I'm not saying that you have to have kids before thirty, you just need to plan.

The_Conductor · 13-10-2013 06:59PM

Potatoeman wrote: »

It depends on the individual but the older you are the less energy you will have and the more likely you are suffer from illness. Your going to be dealing with teenagers in your late fifties.

Unfortunately you don't have to be old to suffer serious illness- children are remarkable though and do take things in their stride. I will be dealing with teenagers in my late 50s- yes, and I hope I have the strength and energy to. I don't regret them for a moment though- even if we are stony broke. No-one ever told me that childcare would bankrupt me

There is a lot to be said for age being a frame of mind- rather than a number. Ok- women have a biological clock- like it or not- and it is harder to conceive the older they get, and they are more likely to encounter complications.

I don't regret our two for a moment- even when I'm exhausted and barely able to drag myself up the stairs- they are what I live for.

Susie564 · 13-10-2013 07:12PM

Potatoeman wrote: »

You still have time, you just need to factor in what you consider to be the timeframe for you to meet someone and settle down. I'm not saying that you have to have kids before thirty, you just need to plan.

Haha - don't worry - I would think if I were to meet someone tmrw I would be thinking of having a baby at about 34/35, which is still do-able. My sister just had her second and she's 39 this year. I was never all that pushed about having kids but I'm really not sure I fancy doing it so late into my thirties. Maybe I'd feel diferently if Mr. Right made an appearance but at the moment I don't think so (neither event looking likely btw!) Lots of women are having babies a little later in life now and if it feels right for you - great!

I'm just saying that as I had a lot else going on in my life during my twenties I really ignored the romantic side of my life and I wish I hadn't now because it's that bit harder to meet people as you get a bit older. If I had my time over again it's something I would do differently - that's all.

Susie564 · 13-10-2013 07:18PM

The_Conductor wrote: »

Unfortunately you don't have to be old to suffer serious illness

I concur - my mam died age 46 but I wouldn't ever let that be a deciding factor. It annoys me when people say that you shouldn't have kids when you are older cause you might not be around for them. Anything could happen, no matter what age you are, to mean you wouldn't be around for them. That's just an unfortunate fact of life.

The_Conductor · 13-10-2013 07:23PM

Susie564 wrote: »

I concur - my mam died age 46 but I wouldn't ever let that be a deciding factor. It annoys me when people say that you shouldn't have kids when you are older cause you might not be around for them. Anything could happen, no matter what age you are, to mean you wouldn't be around for them. That's just an unfortunate fact of life.

My wife was diagnosed with oesaphageal cancer- aged 32, and 8 years later- we have our two little muchkins. You don't know what life will throw at you- anything is possible. Our two are miracles. Yes- we're both exhausted (we have numerous other health issues)- but I would go to the ends of the earth for either of my two munchkins.

Legs.Eleven · 13-10-2013 08:19PM

ireland.man wrote: »

It also depends on what country you're in. I know when I'm in the States I feel a lot older being in my early 30s than say in France. I think the expectations for people to act and be at a certain 'stage' in life widely vary depending on the culture, to state the obvious. !

Very true. The idea of age is very different from country to country. I feel, without a doubt, younger here in Spain than I do when I go home. I tell my students that 33 is not considered all that young in Ireland and they can't believe it. One of my students was turning 40 recently and I was all, "Ooooh the big 40! How do you feel?" and he said, "Great! I'm still a young guy!" with not a hint of irony or sarcasm. You'd never hear that comment said in seriousness in Ireland.

Why is 30s considered old??

Comments