How important is drinks with dinner?

Fittle · 10-06-2013 04:04PM #1

As with most people, we are on a tight budget and are trying to cut costs everwhere. We got one of those wedding deals with the hotel - all inclusive for X amount etc. We get a 'champagne' reception as part of the deal.

Himself thinks we should use this champagne for the toast and let guests have tea and coffee on arrival, which is fair enough.

However, I really want people to have wine with their dinner.

I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where I wasn't offered a glass of wine with my dinner.

Himself thinks it's a waste of money and that we are giving them a glass of champagne, and if they want wine with their dinner, well....(u get the gist...)

It's probably a saving of 500euro if we don't offer the wine at dinner...but I really think we would appear very mean! Opinions really appreciated thanks.

cookiecakes · 10-06-2013 04:12PM

I don't think drink but I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where I wasn't offered even one glass with dinner. It's up to yourselves at the end of the day but we've trimmed off other stuff in order to be able to offer wine all through dinner.

Have you asked about a corkage fee? Tesco usually do a great 25% off 6 bottles every couple of months where you could probably save a lot if the corkage wasn't too high.

clint_silver · 10-06-2013 04:19PM

Fittle wrote: »

As with most people, we are on a tight budget and are trying to cut costs everwhere. We got one of those wedding deals with the hotel - all inclusive for X amount etc. We get a 'champagne' reception as part of the deal.

Himself thinks we should use this champagne for the toast and let guests have tea and coffee on arrival, which is fair enough.

However, I really want people to have wine with their dinner.

I don't think I've ever been to a wedding where I wasn't offered a glass of wine with my dinner.

Himself thinks it's a waste of money and that we are giving them a glass of champagne, and if they want wine with their dinner, well....(u get the gist...)

It's probably a saving of 500euro if we don't offer the wine at dinner...but I really think we would appear very mean! Opinions really appreciated thanks.

Theres a couple of ways of looking at this, lot people , myself included like to drink wine with my meal, I wont drink beer or spirits.
If I sat down at a provided meal I must admit I would expect wine to be served with it, however, if I knew there wasnt wine, it wouldnt bother me in the slightest and I would get it myself. But I would like to know that there isnt wine being served so I could do this. Id be more miffed that I wasnt told there was no wine rather the lack of wine in the first place. If ya get me. I wouldnt see that its mean at all that theres none. budget dictates and 500e is a lot of money if ya dont have it.

Another way of looking at it is this. how many people are you having? 150? only 100 will have 1-2 glasses. Say 2 glasses each. 200 glasses of wine is 50 bottles. Get wine out of dunnes or tesco on one of those 25% off deals for 5e a bottle and knock your bill down to 250e so now youre only looking at half original estimate if your hotel will let you do your own wine if thats doable for your budget.

January · 10-06-2013 04:23PM

We're not having wine with our meal. It's not included in the package and we won't be providing it ourselves. We will be providing a toast drink.

Fittle · 10-06-2013 04:25PM

Corkage is 12.50 per bottle - already looked into that - so even with a cheap bottle from tesco, it still works out pricey!
Wedding will have 100 guests...

I'm glad you agree that you've never been to a wedding where you weren't offered wine with dinner.

Himself says he has never been offered wine at any wedding he's ever been to.

But then himself drinks beer...so probably didn't notice that women like me were lashing it down at the table beside him;)

On another note...if we want the cake served, it's 4.95 per slice for the hotel to cut it for us!! Needless to say, I shall have a cake knife and paper plates hidden somewhere!

toadfly · 10-06-2013 04:26PM

I've never been to a wedding without wine being provided. We had two glasses per person for ours and I dont drink wine. Most people do though. We also had a proscecco round for the toast.

January · 10-06-2013 04:31PM

Fittle wrote: »

Corkage is 12.50 per bottle - already looked into that - so even with a cheap bottle from tesco, it still works out pricey!
Wedding will have 100 guests...

I'm glad you agree that you've never been to a wedding where you weren't offered wine with dinner.

Himself says he has never been offered wine at any wedding he's ever been to.

But then himself drinks beer...so probably didn't notice that women like me were lashing it down at the table beside him;)

On another note...if we want the cake served, it's 4.95 per slice for the hotel to cut it for us!! Needless to say, I shall have a cake knife and paper plates hidden somewhere!

Fricken hell, that's mental! Ours will be served as part of the evening finger food and they're not charging us for cutting it!

clint_silver · 10-06-2013 04:33PM

January wrote: »

We're not having wine with our meal. It's not included in the package and we won't be providing it ourselves. We will be providing a toast drink.

I think I would like to know this if I was a guest. again, its not a problem, its just something I think would be expected at the table and could sort out myself if I knew beforehand. Speaking as a wine drinker, if I sat down I would be waiting for wine to come out, if I then found out there was none, I wouldnt be put out there was none, but would be that I hadnt known beforehand as then Id have to go to bar. not too much mind you.

Himself says he has never been offered wine at any wedding he's ever been to.

Never seen wine not offered. And Im at a lot of weddings.

Corkage is 12.50 per bottle - already looked into that - so even with a cheap bottle from tesco, it still works out pricey!
Wedding will have 100 guests...

:eek: tiger prices. havent seen a corkage that high in a long time but I guess they have to load the drink to make money on the package though wherever they are.

clint_silver · 10-06-2013 04:36PM

January wrote: »

Fricken hell, that's mental! Ours will be served as part of the evening finger food and they're not charging us for cutting it!

I think that price is Cutting and serving and usually in lieu of a paid for dessert course.

January · 10-06-2013 04:37PM

clint_silver wrote: »

I think I would like to know this if I was a guest. again, its not a problem, its just something I think would be expected at the table and could sort out myself if I knew beforehand. Speaking as a wine drinker, if I sat down I would be waiting for wine to come out, if I then found out there was none, I wouldnt be put out there was none, but would be that I hadnt known beforehand as then Id have to go to bar. not too much mind you.

Never seen wine not offered. And Im at a lot of weddings.

:eek: tiger prices. havent seen a corkage that high in a long time but I guess they have to load the drink to make money on the package though wherever they are.

I'm sure it will get around through word of mouth before the wedding, 18 months to go! :P I do understand where you are coming from though, but knowing my guest I know some, but not a lot, of them drink wine so it would be pointless for us to provide wine with the meal. They can indeed order a glass of it for the toast if they so wish!

Addle · 10-06-2013 04:38PM

Very important.
More important than a champagne reception IMO.

Fittle · 10-06-2013 04:52PM

Yeah, I think it's more important than the champers too!

I agree that I'd like to know in advance if there was no wine with the dinner (so I would know to bring more money with me and buy my own)...but how on earth can I let people know we aren't doing wine with the dinner??? What would I say?

We are battling between the wine with the dinner....(650e) OR a bar extension for an hour (700e)...He thinks the bar extension is more important.

January · 10-06-2013 04:57PM

I'd reckon go with the wine for the dinner if that's what you are battling with. Chances are most of the people that are coming to your wedding will stay in the venue overnight, they can use the residents bar if they want to drink after the main bar is closed.

phili_g · 10-06-2013 05:03PM

bar extension for an hour (700e)

Since when does a bar extension cost 700e?

It should only cost 450e?

flikflak · 10-06-2013 05:04PM

Dont think I have ever been to a wedding where wine was not offered with dinner. I would expect to be offered wine when sitting down for a meal and if not then I would be a bit annoyed if I wasnt aware I was supposed to buy my own.

If you are going to go down the route of not having it then make sure people are aware so they can budget. Maybe you could put on the invite something like `and then afterwards dinner only (no drinks)`.

This is one of the reasons we are getting married abroad. Drinks for the reception, included. Drinks with the meal, included. Toast drinks, included. Digestifs, included. Free bar after the meal, included.

I would also tell them to shove their knife where the sun dont shine for nearly a fiver a pop to cut your cake!! They will be charging for guests to use the bathroom soon. I would also check out the so called champagne. Most of the stuff they serve at weddings is cheapo sparkling wine that they call champagne.

D3PO · 10-06-2013 05:06PM

Op if I was at a wedding where wine wasn't served at the meal id think tight b*stards. that said if there was no drinks reception or toast I wouldn't think anything of it.

what I'm trying to get at is that wine with your meal is pretty much expected as the norm whereby nobody expects a drinks reception or a toast drink.

If you have a choice drop the drinks reception or toast drink over dropping wine at the meal.

sanna · 10-06-2013 05:15PM

Fittle wrote: »

Yeah, I think it's more important than the champers too!

I agree that I'd like to know in advance if there was no wine with the dinner (so I would know to bring more money with me and buy my own)...but how on earth can I let people know we aren't doing wine with the dinner??? What would I say?

We are battling between the wine with the dinner....(650e) OR a bar extension for an hour (700e)...He thinks the bar extension is more important.

We got offered stupid money for bar extension till I said sure most us will be staying at the hotel so we can drink all night!
Wedding planner agreed!
Happy days!

Zaph · 10-06-2013 05:35PM

I've never heard of a wedding package that didn't include wine, and charging for the cake to be cut is just unbelievable. My guess is that the hotel offered great value packages but all the stuff you'd want and expect is then extra. People do expect to have wine with their dinner, and tbh it's not an unreasonable expectation. If I was given a choice between the wine and a bar extension I'd have no hesitation in choosing the wine every time. The other thing you'd need to factor in is that if everyone has to look after themselves at the meal, it will cause chaos and seriously disrupt the service if they have to go get the drinks themselves. So you'll need to make sure the hotel has enough staff on so that there are some just to look after drinks orders, and by the sounds of them they'll probably charge you extra for that.

lazygal · 10-06-2013 07:01PM

I would chose wine with dinner over toast drinks or bubbly. But I'd also see where cuts could be made to give guests a nice experience. If there's one thing that'll linger in the memory its scabbiness with food and drink. I've never been to a wedding without wine at a meal and I'd think it was a little odd.

Malari · 10-06-2013 07:22PM

I'd echo what others are saying about never having been to a wedding without wine served. Even if it was one glass it would be a nice touch.

However, I don't think it's necessarily a sign of being tight. Different people prioritise different things. I'd suggest something like putting the menu up next to the seating/table plan and include a small wine list with prices. I know if I realised when sitting down that there would be no wine served I'd be asking the table in general if we'd share a bottle or 3 between us! See if the staff will take wine orders with the food orders perhaps?

Sala · 10-06-2013 08:07PM

I would ditch the toast for the wine. I have never seen no wine served, it is pretty much expected. That said, I was at a wedding where everyone only got one glass (I refused as I had one from the bar and didn't get asked again!). You could limit the amount?

Also corkage could be bargained down. My sister got it in her place for €8 and got the wine in Tesco when one of the buy 6 bottles with 25 % off.

Dubl07 · 10-06-2013 08:33PM

If I'd forked out on a wedding gift, an outfit, travel and a hotel room, I'd expect a glass or two of wine. If I knew in advance that I'd be expected to buy my own wine at your reception, I would send apologies and your gift would be a lettuce-knife from Lakeland.

tatabubbly · 10-06-2013 08:54PM

For my package is €50 per head I'm having cocktails, choice of 3 for the champagne and then one glass of wine with two top ups.. There is definitely choice out there.. We decided to pay a little extra towards our food and drinks and scrimp on other bits as the afters is definitely what you remember..

loveisdivine · 10-06-2013 09:00PM

To be honest it sounds like your getting ripped off. I dunno how much your package was but were paying €4500 for ours with 80 guests. That includes champagne reception, wine with dinner and a wheel barrow of bottled beers for non wine drinkers.

hickory · 10-06-2013 09:43PM

Why not cut the champagne for the arrival and or the toast. Alot of weddings I have been to do not serve this and our hotel told us very few people provided a drink for the toast anymore.
I think it would be better to serve the wine. If not it can prove problematic at certain tables who don't know each other, do they club together to buy a bottle of wine for the table, does 1/2 people buy a bottle of wine but then have to offer glasses to other people at the table.

Even cut the cake, alot of people do not notice the cake but I think your hotel are seriously overcharging and I would argue this charge never heard of it before.

sweetie · 10-06-2013 09:44PM

Many venues throw in the bar extension free. I've heard that they apply for a number of extensions together this only paying a fraction of that 450. Id also be of the opinion wine is a must and a toast is only a plus!

Senna · 10-06-2013 09:50PM

Lot of people going for these cheap deals without realizing it will cost them more in the long run if they want "normal" menu items.

OP just ask the hotel to replace the one glass of bubbly for one glass of wine with dinner. Unless they are complete ripoff merchants, they should be able to do that.

Rachiee · 10-06-2013 10:01PM

I do think its very important and have never been to a wedding where it hasnt been offered. If the guest know though and they also understand youre stuck for money you might get away with it. But I would be really disappointed. Most guest will be spending the guts of 300 euro to attend with drink for the evening a present clothes etc more if they have to book a nights accomodation, so they would expect the hospitality of a glass with dinner

bee06 · 10-06-2013 10:09PM

clint_silver wrote: »

:eek: tiger prices. havent seen a corkage that high in a long time but I guess they have to load the drink to make money on the package though wherever they are.

Corkage in the hotel we've booked is 15 euro for wine and 20 for champagne and completely non-negotiable but they give complimentary corkage if you want to provide champagne/sparkling wine for drinks reception and wine for dinner is part of the package.

OP I think this hotel is totally taking advantage though, cost to cut the cake, 700 euro for the bar extension ... completely ridiculous.

I assume you've booked and paid the deposit already?

10-06-2013 10:11PM

[QUOTE=Fittle;85003187

On another note...if we want the cake served, it's 4.95 per slice for the hotel to cut it for us!! Needless to say, I shall have a cake knife and paper plates hidden somewhere![/QUOTE]:eek::eek::eek::eek:

I'm literally picking myself up off the floor after reading this

January · 10-06-2013 10:15PM

It's crazy how many people think wine should be provided with the meal, the last 7 weddings I've been to, wine was served with 1 of the meals and that was it, the rest had a toast drink, or no drinks at all. It's definitely not the norm within my circles and people would prefer to be able to choose their drink rather than have a drink they don't like forced on them.

Corkage in my venue is being charged at €10 a bottle. The bar extension was included in the package (€500 value normally stated on the contract)

How important is drinks with dinner?

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