Why do people still have expensive weddings?

southsiderosie · 12-05-2013 10:55PM

Birroc wrote: »

It's such a waste of a day/weekend sitting around at mass or in a hotel pretending to be having a great time when secretly wishing to be a) drunk as a skunk at midnight and stuffing your face with cocktail sausages

This isn't a call to end weddings; it is a call to have more beer and sausages at weddings! That shouldn't be too hard, should it?

12-05-2013 10:57PM

Sam Kade wrote: »

Welcome to the over 40's club

HAHA I'm not 40 ! :eek:

oldyouth · 12-05-2013 10:59PM

Deleted User wrote: »

HAHA I'm not 40 ! :eek:

Me neither, I'm in my 50's

12-05-2013 11:00PM

oldyouth wrote: »

Me neither, I'm in my 50's

Early 30's !

Sittingpretty · 12-05-2013 11:03PM

lightspeed wrote: »

I dont get it at all. My brothers Wedding is gonna cost over €30000. Him and the bride to be have both been saving for over 2 years. I just cant understand why people still pay this kind of money for a wedding.

I know others in work who say they are going to struggle to get the money together for a deposit on a house and yet spare no expense when it comes to the wedding day?

What i find odd is that plenty people from middle class tax bracket to those on the higher end will complain when taxes are increased but will spend this kind of money on one ****ing day?

What is wrong with just getting a neighbour to dress up as a priest, have it in the back garden and let all the guests tuck into a swiss roll?

People have expensive weddings because women want them. That's why.
In my experience men don't give a Fcuk about weddings and all the frills and fluff that go along with them.

Sam Kade · 12-05-2013 11:04PM

oldyouth wrote: »

Me neither, I'm in my 50's

Yes the over 40's club allows anyone over the age of 40

Sam Kade · 12-05-2013 11:06PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Early 30's !

Jaysus, you're starting early :eek:

December2012 · 12-05-2013 11:06PM

Birroc wrote: »

Most people don't want to go to weddings unless the bride/groom are close family and even then it can be a chore. People have seen it all before. And you will not impress anyone spending a fortune on your wedding because they are so easily forgotten or else merge into all the other weddings you've gone to.
People getting married need to remember that people would prefer a letter from the Revenue to a wedding invite. It's such a waste of a day/weekend sitting around at mass or in a hotel pretending to be having a great time when secretly wishing to be a) drunk as a skunk at midnight and stuffing your face with cocktail sausages or b) at home in bed

I do not get this at all.

What's so bad about weddings? You don't have to spend a fortune as a guest. You also don't have to go if you don't want to.

I've enjoyed all weddings I went to.

Addle · 12-05-2013 11:07PM

From my own personal experience, I know that at least 1 Irish guy (my ex!) was way more in to the whole big wedding thing than his fiancee (me!).
He can't be the only one?!

Edit: I can't thank posts for some reason!

Sam Kade · 12-05-2013 11:11PM

December2012 wrote: »

I do not get this at all.

What's so bad about weddings? You don't have to spend a fortune as a guest. You also don't have to go if you don't want to.

I've enjoyed all weddings I went to.

His wife probably drags him along

12-05-2013 11:13PM

Addle wrote: »

From my own personal experience, I know that at least 1 Irish guy (my ex!) was way more in to the whole big wedding thing than his fiancee (me!).
He can't be the only one?!

Edit: I can't thank posts for some reason!

So you were married and now divorced or pending divorce ?

12-05-2013 11:14PM

Sam Kade wrote: »

Jaysus, you're starting early :eek:

HAHAH I always hated weddings, boring as hell !

.jacksparrow. · 12-05-2013 11:20PM

December2012 wrote: »

I do not get this at all.

What's so bad about weddings? You don't have to spend a fortune as a guest. You also don't have to go if you don't want to.

I've enjoyed all weddings I went to.

Nothing better to moan about in life!

Vojera · 12-05-2013 11:55PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

As regarding inheritance, a will takes care of that.

My will is made and it's all sorted as to who gets what.

Just remember that if you have any significant assets then revenue will take a hefty chuck.

13-05-2013 12:18AM

Vojera wrote: »

Just remember that if you have any significant assets then revenue will take a hefty chuck.

Is that a good enough reason to get married ?

Addle · 13-05-2013 12:21AM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

So you were married and now divorced or pending divorce ?

No. Never married. Weddings weren't the only thing we didn't agree on.

No one is forced to have a big wedding, and no one is forced to go to a wedding.

So no one is entitled to complain about them!

13-05-2013 12:29AM

Addle wrote: »

No. Never married. Weddings weren't the only thing we didn't agree on.

No one is forced to have a big wedding, and no one is forced to go to a wedding.

So no one is entitled to complain about them!

Yes of course people are entitled to complain about weddings.

Sometimes you have to go when invited because you care about that person, or your invited because of your partner being a friend, relative etc and so it's not as easy as saying you are not forced to go.

Addle · 13-05-2013 12:35AM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Yes of course people are entitled to complain about weddings.

Sometimes you have to go when invited because you care about that person, or your invited because of your partner being a friend, relative etc and so it's not as easy as saying you are not forced to go.

Well I'd you really care then you shouldn't begrudge.

southsiderosie · 13-05-2013 12:41AM

Deleted User wrote: »

Yes of course people are entitled to complain about weddings.

Sometimes you have to go when invited because you care about that person, or your invited because of your partner being a friend, relative etc and so it's not as easy as saying you are not forced to go.

Why would you not want to go to the wedding of someone you care about?

I've turned down wedding invitations from dear friends because I couldn't afford to go, but I can't imagine not wanting to be at their wedding.

April O Neill · 13-05-2013 12:42AM

Addle wrote: »

Well I'd you really care then you shouldn't begrudge.

Maybe if people continue questioning the prevailing wedding model in this country as it stands, things might actually change to less money-driven, less showy, more relaxing affairs. People like spending time with loved ones, but it can be a huge strain on people financially and boring to boot as things stand now (in general).

13-05-2013 12:45AM

Addle wrote: »

Well I'd you really care then you shouldn't begrudge.

No I don't begrudge, but I do question their reasoning.

I've no problem with 2 people who want to get married and spend a sensible amount of money and invite only their friends and people they want and not who they are told to invite or not invite out of fear of offending anyone.

I do think it's foolish when 2 people get married because of pressure and because everyone they know is doing it and they feel left out, or because they feel they won't find anyone else, or they want the big day out, the white dress and the walk down the isle, the attention or because they think they are getting too old and same reason they have Children because their friends, brothers, sisters, colleagues etc have them and that's all they talk about these days so they might as well just do it to be normal. The reason if I don't do it now I never will or I'll regret it in years to come ****e.

13-05-2013 12:47AM

southsiderosie wrote: »

Why would you not want to go to the wedding of someone you care about?

I've turned down wedding invitations from dear friends because I couldn't afford to go, but I can't imagine not wanting to be at their wedding.

Never said I wouldn't want to go to someone's wedding I care about, I still don't have to like weddings.

SparkySpitfire · 13-05-2013 12:50AM

I'll get married at a car boot sale, I just want the dress.

Justin1982 · 13-05-2013 12:50AM

Addle wrote: »

No. Never married. Weddings weren't the only thing we didn't agree on.

No one is forced to have a big wedding, and no one is forced to go to a wedding.

So no one is entitled to complain about them!

I dont know about that. Most of the idiots in this country are fully prepared to 10-30K on some retarded wedding that lasts a couple of hours and then the same pricks wont pay their debts, their bills or even save the money for their kids education or something useful. Then the kids grow up to be as retarded as the parents and the cycle continues.

13-05-2013 12:51AM

April O Neill wrote: »

Maybe if people continue questioning the prevailing wedding model in this country as it stands, things might actually change to less money-driven, less showy, more relaxing affairs. People like spending time with loved ones, but it can be a huge strain on people financially and boring to boot as things stand now (in general).

It's not just the money, it's the reasons for getting married that I question a lot of the time.

I couldn't care less about the money if it was something they could absolutely afford and the right people were there that the bride and groom want and not what their parents want, or people they feel are entitled to be there.

13-05-2013 12:53AM

bed time, night all.

brianthomas · 13-05-2013 01:00AM

Money to be made too tho. If 150 ppl go. Say 75 couples for handyness. Standard 100 in a card off each pair. 7.5K back straight away. And in cases, I've known both sets of parents have given 5k each to the cpl. 17.5 grand off the bill. Albeit in gifts. Don't shoot the messenger.. But it happens.

keeponhurling · 13-05-2013 06:36AM

A good tip to maximise profits is to only invite friends or people you know who have a lot of money. Poorer firends generally contribute less, or give gifts.
Friends of your parents who have money is even better. Doctors, judges, politicians etc. are all good.

A good way to pressure them to attend and give a decent gift is to visit them and tell them personally that are engaged (even if you haven't seen them for years, or don't really know them), emphasising how excited you both are about tying the knot.

Insist that it will mean the world to you if they can attend, before switching conversation to how expensive these weddings can be, some of these companies are sharks, sure you're only trying to start out in life etc.
Also it might be worthwhile to hand-deliver the invite, mentioning that you specifically considered them when selecting the main course and band. That way they cannot pretend they didn't receive it, and will be clear there's an expectation to attend.

If they still don't attend and no gift is received, it might be worth calling around to them with some photos of the day, talk them through them, keep things fresh in their mind.
In addition, take a few photos at a tourist attraction in a neighbouring county, and say they are the honeymoon snaps. Some castle or Celtic cross or something like that will do it. Emphasize that you couldn't afford anything better. If still necessary, mention that some guests at your wedding recently had the cheek to come and eat the food and were stingy with the gifts.

.jacksparrow. · 13-05-2013 08:00AM

Justin1982 wrote: »

I dont know about that. Most of the idiots in this country are fully prepared to 10-30K on some retarded wedding that lasts a couple of hours and then the same pricks wont pay their debts, their bills or even save the money for their kids education or something useful. Then the kids grow up to be as retarded as the parents and the cycle continues.

Most of the idiots in this country? Are we talkin 80%, 90%?

Vojera · 13-05-2013 09:27AM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Is that a good enough reason to get married ?

If you're planning on spending your lives together, I don't see why you wouldn't, to be honest, especially if there are kids involved. Wills can always be challenged, if the house is in one partner's name it could financially cripple the remaining one to pay the inheritance tax on it, etc.

Staying together or breaking up isn't marriage-dependent, but staying unmarried doesn't guarantee financial freedom in the event of a break-up anyway once you're living together long enough. It's not the most romantic viewpoint but if marriage was strictly the realm of romance there would be no legal recognition for it.

Why do people still have expensive weddings?

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