The Online Dating Thread 3..READ 1ST POST Oct 2012

chakasklap · 08-12-2012 07:04PM

hollypink wrote: »

Can I get some advice from you guys? Is 10 years too much of an age gap do you think? And if an older (late thirties) woman is contacted by a guy in his late twenties, is there a good chance he is looking for NSA? Its been fun exchanging messages and he seems like a nice, interesting guy but I am a bit wary.

Gotta judge everyone on their own merits - wouldn't be right to prejudge him as someone looking for NSA.

As for age difference, that's different for everyone. I've made the mistake of misjudging it before - got chatting and doubted I was a match with one particular person for a few reasons, one of them was me being 9 years older, but she asked to meet - while I wouldn't call it a date, it was good for both of us to head out.

I was right to have my doubts, but the difference was between 21 and 30. I'm sure I bored her a bit, there were times when I felt worlds apart from how she looked at things.

But by your late twenties your worldview is pretty well defined - you've started to commit to knowing which choices are the best for you rather than still working things out. So the same age gap between 30 and 39 or whatever would probably be much less of an dealbreaker.

Galvasean · 09-12-2012 12:00PM

Weird one. Was on stage last night and got that OKC *buzz* "x is in your area". Must mail her and ask her if she enjpyed the gig.

mood · 09-12-2012 12:04PM

Galvasean wrote: »

Weird one. Was on stage last night and got that OKC *buzz* "x is in your area". Must mail her and ask her if she enjpyed the gig.

Are you in contact with her?

I wouldn't use a dating site app. I wouldn't like be tracked like that. And as a woman I certainly wouldn't feel safe.

miamee · 09-12-2012 12:05PM

mood wrote: »

Are you in contact with her?

I wouldn't use a dating site app. I wouldn't like be tracked like that. And as a woman I certainly wouldn't feel safe.

It pops up at the oddest of times, e.g. on the bus home

So I have it turned off!

Galvasean · 09-12-2012 12:06PM

Keep meaning to turn it off as it's a little strange. Could certainly see such a thing being used for nefarious purposes. How do you turn it off anyhow?

Meauldsegosha · 09-12-2012 12:09PM

mood wrote: »

Are you in contact with her?

I wouldn't use a dating site app. I wouldn't like be tracked like that. And as a woman I certainly wouldn't feel safe.

You can turn the location setting off on the mobile app so it's safe enough.

Sky King · 09-12-2012 12:10PM

This exists!? Wow that's quite invasive,

mood · 09-12-2012 12:14PM

Why would anyone what to use it anyway? Very odd.

miamee · 09-12-2012 12:20PM

Galvasean wrote: »

Keep meaning to turn it off as it's a little strange. Could certainly see such a thing being used for nefarious purposes. How do you turn it off anyhow?

On the app just go to Settings, then Locations to turn it off. The 'Locations-let's get started' is always the default opening page on the app once turned off which is annoying but worth it not to have a stranger seeking you out in a crowd, lol.

Galvasean · 09-12-2012 12:58PM

Cheers. I can imagine people doing their Xmas shopping only to have some guy walk up to the and hand them a picture of a penis...

sharper · 09-12-2012 02:32PM

Galvasean wrote: »

Cheers. I can imagine people doing their Xmas shopping only to have some guy walk up to the and hand them a picture of a penis...

No need for a picture when you're standing right next to them!

I think it's interesting to see people's reactions to the okc app here. I do think it's worth remembering that okc are an American company and America has a fairly well developed dating culture, something that's lacking here. It's reasonably acceptable there to walk upto a stranger in public, have a conversation and organise a date. The okc app obviously fits pretty well into that since it helps to match up available people in the same physical location.

Most of the people here seem a bit shocked and perturbed they might have to face a potential date while doing their shopping or waiting for the bus.

As for me, the only bad outcome I can imagine is the notification going off at work and finding you've been matched with someone in your office. Awkward!

mood · 09-12-2012 02:39PM

Imagine you are a women, you have the app on while walking home after work on a dark night and you are unlucky enough for a man approach you after getting an alert you are on the same street. Any woman would be totally freaked out. Even if the man is very nice and polite it is not something I want to experience.

Esoteric_ · 09-12-2012 02:47PM

mood wrote: »

Imagine you are a women, you have the app on while walking home after work on a dark night and you are unlucky enough for a man approach you after getting an alert you are on the same street. Any woman would be totally freaked out. Even if the man is very nice and polite it is not something I want to experience.

I must think that I'm invincible or something. My first thought about this app was - Oh God, what if I'm running to/from work? HE CAN'T SEE ME WITHOUT MAKE UP. :eek::eek::eek:

Clearly personal safety isn't a high concern of mine. :rolleyes:

LittleFox · 09-12-2012 03:25PM

Does anyone know of a good Chinese or Italian restaurant in town? I've a first date tomorrow, he's coming up from Galway so he's asked me to pick where to go

Galvasean · 09-12-2012 03:28PM

LittleFox wrote: »

Does anyone know of a good Chinese or Italian restaurant in town? I've a first date tomorrow, he's coming up from Galway so he's asked me to pick where to go

That Chinese place next to The Laughter Lounge is meant to be great. Jimmy Cheung's I think it's called.

Esoteric_ · 09-12-2012 03:30PM

Galvasean wrote: »

That Chinese place next to The Laughter Lounge is meant to be great. Jimmy Cheung's I think it's called.

I wouldn't call it more than 'all right.' Probably a good place for a first date though, casual, chatty atmosphere and the food's all right, nothing terrible anyway.

mood · 09-12-2012 03:52PM

Saba. It's Thai not Chinese and sooooo much better.

DerekDGoldfish · 09-12-2012 04:16PM

LittleFox wrote: »

Does anyone know of a good Chinese or Italian restaurant in town? I've a first date tomorrow, he's coming up from Galway so he's asked me to pick where to go

Toscana on dame st is a nice reasonably priced Italian resturaunt

mikemac1 · 09-12-2012 04:24PM

http://www.yamamorisushi.ie

Sushi place on the North Quays.

It's a little different to most meals out so interesting and the food is great
I know you asked for Chinese but I'm just giving another option

I'd then head for cocktails in the Morrison hotel around the corner, beautiful hotel

Sure if plans change ye can get the Luas, it's next door

Decent plan for a date I think

LittleFox · 09-12-2012 04:48PM

Thank you for all the suggestions they are great plenty to chose from now depending where we end up. Date wasn't meant to be until Wednesday week when he was up for a gig but after chatting more he didn't want to wait that long so brought it forward so fingers crossed that's a good sign

Larianne · 09-12-2012 04:52PM

Do many people here go to dinner on the first date? I'd find it quite awkward. What if there is zero attraction or they are not how they seemed to be online? There would be no escape!

Galvasean · 09-12-2012 04:59PM

Dunno about dinner, but I've gotten lunch a couple of times. Once it's nothing fancy (ie:a 3 courser or anything) what harm? You're hardly going to be more than an hour. It's probably better than those 'wham bam thank you mam' 20 minute coffee dates...

mood · 09-12-2012 05:02PM

Galvasean wrote: »

Dunno about dinner, but I've gotten lunch a couple of times. Once it's nothing fancy (ie:a 3 courser or anything) what harm? You're hardly going to be more than an hour. It's probably better than those 'wham bam thank you mam' 20 minute coffee dates...

Yes. Even on a date where I wanted to leave as quick as possible I still stayed an hour to finish my drink. I would have felt very rude to leave earlier.

Meauldsegosha · 09-12-2012 05:13PM

I wouldn't go to dinner on a first date, too hard to get away if its awarkward or whatever. I also don't like eating in front of people I don't know.

LittleFox · 09-12-2012 05:18PM

I had one first date that went dinner, the zoo and then coffee after , I've had just coffee, I've had drinks, movie and then drinks, doesn't bother me what we do, I've never had an awkward date thank god.
I'm a chatty person and have no trouble chatting to people I don't know. He's coming all the way from Galway so I wouldn't want to just arrange a coffee, if things don't work out its the least I can do to make sure he goes home with a full stomach

KTRIC · 09-12-2012 06:53PM

Spotted a lovely lady I chatted to before on one site. Got talking again and we're meeting for a coffee tomorrow evening.

I've decided to cut the chat and messaging down to a minimum from now on as it gets you no where.

miamee · 09-12-2012 07:02PM

Well...just had a phone chat with yer man who gave me his number on Thursday. His first question was how am I finding the site, we chatted for about two mins then he asked me would I fancy meeting some time for a coffee and chat. He lives about a half hour drive from me and wants me to go out there as he is recovering from an op. Hmm, bit of a wait and see if I hear from him kind of thing I reckon. I am no wiser after our 4 and a half minute phone call!

Still...tis more action than I've had in a while on POF

supackofidiots · 09-12-2012 07:30PM

miamee wrote: »

Well...just had a phone chat with yer man who gave me his number on Thursday. His first question was how am I finding the site, we chatted for about two mins then he asked me would I fancy meeting some time for a coffee and chat. He lives about a half hour drive from me and wants me to go out there as he is recovering from an op. Hmm, bit of a wait and see if I hear from him kind of thing I reckon. I am no wiser after our 4 and a half minute phone call!

Still...tis more action than I've had in a while on POF

go for it, arrange to go for a drink tonight sure. nothing to lose.

miamee · 09-12-2012 08:28PM

supackofidiots wrote: »

go for it, arrange to go for a drink tonight sure. nothing to lose.

Ah no, too late now, will organise for next week depending on communication during the week

Tigger99 · 10-12-2012 12:34AM

KTRIC wrote: »

Spotted a lovely lady I chatted to before on one site. Got talking again and we're meeting for a coffee tomorrow evening.

I've decided to cut the chat and messaging down to a minimum from now on as it gets you no where.

Mmm what you said about cutting the chat to a minimum is interesting. A guy got chatting to me yesterday and 3 messages and 24hrs later he's asked me out. Dunno it just feels too quick, or am I being mental? Sure the whole point is to meet someone I suppose, but still....

The Online Dating Thread 3..**READ 1ST POST Oct 2012**

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The Online Dating Thread 3..READ 1ST POST Oct 2012