No sex in my house.....

laoisman11 · 22-09-2012 07:16PM #1

Thought that might catch ye're attention!

The OH is living a few hours away (temporary work arrangement) and has had to move flats lately. The new place she has found has an owner who has explicitly forbidden that we sleep together in the bedroom. Instead, there is a type of converted garage adjacent to the house where we are instructed to go to sleep/practise the moves on a fold-up couch. I'd normally spend every second weekend in her place......

Fair enough, as it's the owner's house, they can put in place whatever rules they like but I'm not sure what to make of this at all.....we're both in our 30s FFS. It kind of feels that we're going to do something totally immoral and maybe illegal (I realise that that may be a turn-on for some!) and that we're too debased/immoral/dirty to be allowed sleep (and have sex) in a bedroom.

Herself has accepted it and I haven't really challenged her on it for the moment as she's in the middle of something.

So what do ye reckon? Would ye accept to share a house under this type of restriction? Do ye think it's acceptable to put this type of condition on someone who is paying you rent?

I dunno, i'll give the place a look next weekend, maybe it won't be that bad, and for sure my first aim will be to break the house rules as soon as possible. Otherwise.....herself might be looking for a new flat.....

Poor Uncle Tom · 22-09-2012 07:17PM

So that's what she's telling you.......;)

Tombi! · 22-09-2012 07:17PM

If you're not married then I can't blame him. Some people are insanely religious.
And if you're trying to break the rules, expect her to be told to leave when/if you get caught.

kneemos · 22-09-2012 07:18PM

How old is the house owner?

the groutch · 22-09-2012 07:19PM

landlord obviously not getting any

minidazzler · 22-09-2012 07:19PM

There are camera's in the fcuk room.

Savage924 · 22-09-2012 07:20PM

Well if the landlord say's thats the rules then thats the rules. That's just my opinion though. Maybe try saying it to the landlord and see how he/she replies?

Hande hoche! · 22-09-2012 07:20PM

Threesome?

hardCopy · 22-09-2012 07:20PM

Maybe the walls are thin and the owner doesn't want to listen to yous

bigron2109 · 22-09-2012 07:20PM

Hidden Cameras in the Garage i bet.

Madam · 22-09-2012 07:21PM

Jeesus! I had thought Ireland had moved out of the 19th century:(

NegativeCreep · 22-09-2012 07:22PM

That sounds hot to me tbh.

Jellicoe · 22-09-2012 07:22PM

Simples. He's got the converted garage rigged to record your activities.
Surely your OH can find somewhere else to stay instead of with that loon ?

hardCopy · 22-09-2012 07:23PM

Is this the couch? http://verydemotivational.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/demotivational-posters-if-you-know-what-this-means1.jpg

frag420 · 22-09-2012 07:23PM

Have a **** on the sofa.

No rules against that!

HeyThereDeliah · 22-09-2012 07:24PM

Why is she renting this place with this stupid rule ?
Personally I would break the rule every hour on the hour just for the thrill of getting caught.

redzerologhlen · 22-09-2012 07:24PM

minidazzler wrote: »

There are camera's in the fcuk room.

Sure is...streaming in progress

El Guapo! · 22-09-2012 07:24PM

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

If you're not married then I can't blame him..

Why not??
It's ridiculous and out of order. Fair enough it's his house and his rules and all but they're grown adults and not his children.
I'd tell him to fúck off and go find a different flat.

mikemac1 · 22-09-2012 07:25PM

Be a good man and put a ring on her finger

Jellicoe · 22-09-2012 07:26PM

Brutal Deluxe wrote: »

If you're not married then I can't blame him. Some people are insanely religious.

So why the weird set up of saying they can have sex in his garage instead ?
Nothing to do with religion whatsoever i'd say.

frag420 · 22-09-2012 07:28PM

mikemac1 wrote: »

Be a good man and put her ring on your finger

Fyp

CarrickMcJoe · 22-09-2012 07:28PM

The guy obviously doesn't want you to offload six days of jizz all over the bed.

Micky Dolenz · 22-09-2012 07:31PM

Burn the house down, that will learn the fcuker, good and proper.

Cee-Jay-Cee · 22-09-2012 07:31PM

Could you not just ride her silently? You can use duck tape if need be.

skinny90 · 22-09-2012 07:31PM

For sh*ts and giggles Buy a set of speakers,throw on redtube and crank the volume up full blast
Wait for a reaction perhaps a knock on the door,if the owner asks,just casually say together "ah where just watching a bita porn" and smile back

zenno · 22-09-2012 07:33PM

O.P why did you pick a convent ? of all the places available you just had to pick a convent. Ah well, learn the hard way.

At least you didn't have the landlord kicking in your bedroom door screaming Riding Academy, that's what happened me a good while back and i was in bed at the time with my girl

Zebra3 · 22-09-2012 07:34PM

CJC999 wrote: »

Could you not just ride her silently? You can use duck tape if need be.

And what about for herself?

1ZRed · 22-09-2012 07:35PM

Have sex in the bedroom anyway. How would the owner ever know?

Durrrty :pac:

laoisman11 · 22-09-2012 07:37PM

skinny90 wrote: »

For sh*ts and giggles Buy a set of speakers,throw on redtube and crank the volume up full blast

Good one! Just have to figure out how to put on a time delay on the computer so we're not there when it plays!!

The owner is actually a women, who apparently (according to my OH) is into spirituality and yoga and all that wonderful stuff.

Even though it's a woman, I'll be checking the garage for cameras like ye say. And maybe this spiritual woman is afraid of being overcome by the sounds of lovemaking and couldn't hold herself back. But as I haven't seen her yet, I don't think I'll let that stream of thought advance too far.

Rigol · 22-09-2012 07:38PM

Platerboard wall with peepholes ...... local drunks behind it masturbating frantically.

Entry fee was 2 euro.

Theres a vote on whether or not to try a glory hole.

say_who_now? · 22-09-2012 07:38PM

minidazzler wrote: »

There are camera's in the fcuk room.

Damn you mini!

Maybe the owner just doesn't want you putting footprints all over the walls!

I shared a flat before with my girlfriend and the landlord put up a sign in the bathroom beside the shower saying "One at a time in the shower!" with a picture of two rabbits underneath it, lol, because the other tenants were complaining apparently!

Another house I shared I was taking a bath one night and the other guy, walking by the bathroom roared out "DON'T BE **** IN THE BATH!!"... he may have been joking, but for about 30 seconds I wondered "How the hell did he hear me??", before I went back to playing with my rubber ducky! :pac:

No sex in my house.....

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