Are kids really worth all the hassle

Greentopia · 31-08-2012 07:26PM

suicide_circus wrote: »

A lot of people on here worrying that kids would encroach on their free time while at the same time, i suspect, currently using much of their free time to masturbate and scroll through pages of lolcats.

I never said I make a valuable use of my free time :pac:

But the issue is that it's my time to spend it as I please, whether that's in the worthy pursuit of caring for sick and injured animals in third world countries while reading the collective works of Beckett, or in scrolling through lolcats. It's not time that's dictated by the needs of a child in my life that I would not be equipped to look after.

say_who_now? · 31-08-2012 07:32PM

HemlockOption wrote: »

1. who would that matter to?

Well it just matters to me simply because I wouldn't BE here if my parents had thought "we're not having kids".

2. to admit to that would cause you incredible guilt - so even if you felt regret it's unlikely that you would admit to it

You clearly don't know me very well.

3. 'awsome' - such as ?

Awesome such as the fact that my child makes me laugh for one, another that I get a sense of enormous fulfillment knowing that I am able to provide for another human being and guide them and help them fulfill their potential. There's plenty of upsides to having a child and it'd take a very bitter person to be able to look on having a child as something negative.

We can all say we love our kids but that's a separate issue from the incredibly difficulty and never-ending job of being a parent.

I wouldn't have thought of being a parent as an incredibly difficult job, really I think it's as hard as you make it. There have of course been times when I've had to clip him round the ear for his behaviour but on the whole he's a good kid, not some spoiled little brat that I shower with material goods because I can't be arsed to take ten minutes out of the 24 hours in my day to spend time with him!

positron · 31-08-2012 07:39PM

"Are kids really worth all the hassle?"

Yes.

It's bit like a lazy singleton asking is sex with an actual person (rather than own had) worth all the hassle?

So the answer is yes, and you will know it when you experience it.

Gongoozler · 31-08-2012 07:39PM

I think you could sum up the thread with: children for some, truck loads of contraception / abortions for others!

It is quite patronising to get the 'you'll change your mind once you grow up' attitude. I'm grown up enough to know my own mind, and don't need telling I'm missing something in my life, ta. I consider it a little more mature to actually question the assumption that everyone will have children, rather than ignoring it and saying, 'sure what else would you do with your time?'. That's just crazy shizzle.

hatrickpatrick · 31-08-2012 07:43PM

You don't have to. I really want to some day but that's because I'm fascinated by the scientific and philosophical concept of life as a self sustaining reaction and I regard it as a fundamental purpose to reproduce, and therefore continue "living" even after we ourselves are gone.

Not everyone is interested in that kind of stuff though and I really hate it when people judge others for choosing not to have kids. If you don't want to then don't!

suicide_circus · 31-08-2012 07:45PM

Greentopia wrote: »

I never said I make a valuable use of my free time :pac:

But the issue is that it's my time to spend it as I please, whether that's in the worthy pursuit of caring for sick and injured animals in third world countries while reading the collective works of Beckett, or in scrolling through lolcats. It's not time that's dictated by the needs of a child in my life that I would not be equipped to look after.

yes it's all about you isn't it.You, you , you , you, you and that's the way you like it.

floggg · 31-08-2012 07:51PM

positron wrote: »

"Are kids really worth all the hassle?"

Yes.

It's bit like a lazy singleton asking is sex with an actual person (rather than own had) worth all the hassle?

So the answer is yes, and you will know it when you experience it.

Stupidest analogy of the year. You'd be doing well if sex lasted an hour. A kid hangs around for about 24 years these days.

holystungun9 · 31-08-2012 08:06PM

floggg wrote: »

Stupidest analogy of the year. You'd be doing well if sex lasted an hour. A kid hangs around for about 24 years these days.

The initial connection between having sex and having kids was pretty good.

Eden3 · 31-08-2012 08:09PM

Are you all mad...?

shopaholic01 · 31-08-2012 09:26PM

Late 30's and female - I would rather die than have children. That may seem dramatic but I have never wanted children and genuinely do not think I'd cope. I've listened to the 'you'll change your mind when you're older' and 'wait until your biological clock starts ticking' nonsense for years, when in fact, the older I get, the more adamant I am.

I know I would not be a good parent, and admire those who are, but not everyone is parent material.

Cienciano · 31-08-2012 09:35PM

suicide_circus wrote: »

A lot of people on here worrying that kids would encroach on their free time while at the same time, i suspect, currently using much of their free time to masturbate and scroll through pages of lolcats.

You can still do that when you have kids. Ehhh, my mate who has kids was telling me

suicide_circus · 31-08-2012 09:44PM

shopaholic01 wrote: »

Late 30's and female - I would rather die than have children. That may seem dramatic but I have never wanted children and genuinely do not think I'd cope. I've listened to the 'you'll change your mind when you're older' and 'wait until your biological clock starts ticking' nonsense for years, when in fact, the older I get, the more adamant I am.

I know I would not be a good parent, and admire those who are, but not everyone is parent material.

well then i thank you on behalf of society for not having kids

kowloon · 31-08-2012 09:45PM

I'd make a terrible mother, the idea of childbirth terrifies me too.

It's also a huge responsibility being a parent and I'm not sure I'd do it well.

Do some people avoid being parents out of fear of failing their children, not because they don't want them?

LordSutch · 31-08-2012 11:29PM

Smelly dirty noisy beautiful creatures who don't let you sleep, they poo all the time, they get sick and they cost lots of money to feed and clothe, and they cramp your freedom! but yes they're well worth the hassle, as you put it

)

stoneill · 31-08-2012 11:34PM

When the get to the age when they can get the beer from the fridge, open it and bring it to you it all becomes worth it.

Quorum · 31-08-2012 11:39PM

Wompa1 wrote: »

What else are you going to do?

What's fun?

Travelling?

Mr_Spaceman · 01-09-2012 01:40AM

Motorist wrote: »

Ive spoken to many parents who say having kids is absolute $hit. They long all day for 9pm when they get to spend a miserable two hours in peace.

They can't do anything, they are broke financially because of the kids, they have no lives anymore.

FFS. What a life, eh?

Which begs the obvious: WTF did they have kids for then?

ucd.1985 · 01-09-2012 03:27AM

TPD wrote: »

I find this genuinely confusing. What does 'mot' or 'moth' mean when referring to your husband/wife/boyfriend/girlfriend/whatever?

Comes from the Gaeilge phrase, "cailin maith" which means girlfriend or good girl literally translated.

The Cailin part was dropped to be left with maith.

Napper Hawkins · 01-09-2012 04:27AM

I wouldn't be surprised if many Irish people had kids for the same reason they tick "Catholic" on the census..

gsxr1 · 01-09-2012 04:52AM

Really hard work
cost alot of money
ends your social life as you know it.

But ye will never love anyone as you do your own child ,

Your body will not let you socialize like you do when you are in your 20s for long. (your view on life changes as each decade passes)

When you are old and grey, will you still think the value of a few pound was worth not having your own family around you??

Feck money. People is where its at.

I sometimes think I would be better off, but in the bigger picture im a richer man than any pay packet could bring.

I would hate to be one of those people who have loads of cats to replace their hidden want for children to care for.

Galwayguy35 · 01-09-2012 04:58AM

I'm 37 and don't have any but I would definately like to have them someday.

Two of my friends are divorcing now because she wanted kids and he didn't, what's the point in marrying someone who doesn't feel the same about something as important as that.

gsxr1 · 01-09-2012 05:03AM

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

I'm 37 and don't have any but I would definately like to have them someday.

Two of my friends are divorcing now because she wanted kids and he didn't, what's the point in marrying someone who doesn't feel the same about something as important as that.

You would need to get the finger out then. Tick Tock

Galwayguy35 · 01-09-2012 05:16AM

gsxr1 wrote: »

You would need to get the finger out then. Tick Tock

Really?

Do you think I am an old man or something?

gsxr1 · 01-09-2012 05:22AM

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

Really?

Do you think I am an old man or something?

37. immm

Say it takes a few years to find the right woman.

You have a baby together.

When your kid is 20, you will be 60.

And that's if ya get the finger out.

I dont think you are an oul wan.

Galwayguy35 · 01-09-2012 05:25AM

gsxr1 wrote: »

37. immm

Say it takes a few years to find the right woman.

You have a baby together.

When your kid is 20, you will be 60.

And that's if ya get the finger out.

I dont think you are an oul wan.

That wouldn't bother me, my father was 57 when i was born.

monkeysnapper · 01-09-2012 05:31AM

I really feel we need to get the population down big time, the amount of scum bags on our streets tell us that there's way to many people being brought into this world from parents that cant be a role model for their kids, or have the time to bring them up properly.

Why does everybody fell you // Have to get married/// have to buy a house/// have kids. Its all bull.

We need more people in society like the op , need people to just come out and say "I don't want to have kids"

I have 2 kids and I have to say I really wasn't bothered about having kids at all but felt pressured into having them because thats what you do. Do I have any regrets? not at all , for me its made my life worth living for. But I can imagine loads more people did the same and It Didn't come out the same way.

gsxr1 · 01-09-2012 05:40AM

monkeysnapper wrote: »

I really feel we need to get the population down big time, the amount of scum bags on our streets tell us that there's way to many people being brought into this world from parents that cant be a role model for their kids, or have the time to bring them up properly.

Why does everybody fell you // Have to get married/// have to buy a house/// have kids. Its all bull.

We need more people in society like the op , need people to just come out and say "I don't want to have kids"

I have 2 kids and I have to say I really wasn't bothered about having kids at all but felt pressured into having them because thats what you do. Do I have any regrets? not at all , for me its made my life worth living for. But I can imagine loads more people did the same and It Didn't come out the same way.

Imm you have a point.

I do think kids should be planned by parents who want kids. Maybe the fact that the OP is considering this makes him/her a good future parent.

I dont know. Fecking hell. Im dealing with an 8 year old being bullied at the moment. What I felt 8 years ago seems a million years ago now.
Its not a decision to take lightly. Its a lifetime project that you cant give up on half way through.

Thespoofer · 01-09-2012 06:26AM

Have 3 boys. The two youngest can sometimes drive me f*#@ing bananas, to the point I tell my eldest not to get married and have kids ( jokingly...ahem ).

But after saying that I was once the guy who absolutely LIVED to go out to clubs on the tear, chasing the wimmin and so on to the point of almost ruination..and since settling down with a diamond wife and kids who drive me nuts ( think ' Malcolm in the middle ' ), it has made me a better man, more stable, focussed and even financially better off as I now save my hard earned.

No pain no gain !

NIMAN · 01-09-2012 06:31AM

As someone who has had to start shift work with maybe 2 or 3 hours sleep on a fairly regular basis, I'd say no to the original question, but overall I'd say yeah, they are definitely worth it.;)

You get used to the extreme exhaustion.

Scanlas The 2nd · 01-09-2012 06:52AM

What's with so many people thinking we need fewer babies being born, correct me if I'm wrongful but isn't there a problem approaching in that we don't have enough young people to support the growing number of elderly in the first world, we need more kids not less.

Are kids really worth all the hassle

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