Socially inept people

TeddyTedson · 23-08-2012 11:03PM #1

What's with socially inept people? How are they so out touch with the majority of people that they have major difficulties communicating the simplest of things? I'm not talking about quiet or shy people here. But people how might have been in school, college or work with you who nobody could ever get.

I work with someone who is great at their job in a lot of ways and very intelligent. However them being socially inept basically makes them useless if they have to work with someone else together on something.
Their communication skills are utterly dire.

I actually think people like this need to be sent on course on how to work with people. They generally don't lack confidence or anything either in my experiences.
Socialising with them is often full of cringe worthy moments.
Is it nature or nurture?

Where To · 23-08-2012 11:06PM

What are you trying to say Teddy?

Eden3 · 23-08-2012 11:06PM

World would be a boring place if we were all PERFECT OP!

Person you speak of is doing well in his job regardless ...! He should start a thread "Sociall intolerant people"!

Had to be said....:rolleyes:

conorcan2 · 23-08-2012 11:06PM

There's a chance they have social anxiety/phobia.

Praetorian Saighdiuir · 23-08-2012 11:10PM

They are all on here!

The King of Moo · 23-08-2012 11:10PM

Some people simply can't help it.

Some might have had some knockback in their past, recent or distant, which has dented their confidence.

Some might find themselves in a difficult situation, e.g. new job, town etc.

Some grew up in an environment where expression wasn't encouraged, or it was actively stifled.

There's lots of reasons someone might be socially inept. Don't forget, most of them are probably just intimidated by your luxuriant fur.

Shryke · 23-08-2012 11:11PM

Medical/psychological problem or impairment, developmental issue or illness. Messed up upbringing. Or just the way they are. It's not something to sneer at really, we're all different. Leave off on the special camps courses.

efb · 23-08-2012 11:12PM

The ironing of this topic on boards is delicious!!!

M cebee · 23-08-2012 11:12PM

bolox **** off

girl in the striped socks · 23-08-2012 11:13PM

I prefer so called socially inept people to those who try to be everyone's best friend.
I like people who are a little bit strange tbh.

Shryke · 23-08-2012 11:15PM

Teddy is the Louis Theroux of Boards.

TeddyTedson · 23-08-2012 11:15PM

The King of Moo wrote: »

Some people simply can't help it.

Some might have had some knockback in their past, recent or distant, which has dented their confidence.

Some might find themselves in a difficult situation, e.g. new job, town etc.

Some grew up in an environment where expression wasn't encouraged, or it was actively stifled.

There's lots of reasons someone might be socially inept. Don't forget, most of them are probably just intimidated by your luxuriant fur.

Oh I know they can't help it.
And I'm one of the most tolerant people you'll ever meet (or not meet perhaps).

I stress I'm not talking about shy, nervous or people who are in any way anxious.
Such people could quite possibly come across perfectly in written format for example.
Think a la Alan Partridge.
Aha!

admiralofthefleet · 23-08-2012 11:17PM

benwavner wrote: »

They are all on here!

....moderating

Pace2008 · 23-08-2012 11:18PM

If people are so bad that they can't even communicate in a team situation it sounds like they could possibly have a touch of autism.

/internet psychiatrist

Where To · 23-08-2012 11:19PM

Praetorian Saighdiuir · 23-08-2012 11:20PM

admiralofthefleet wrote: »

....moderating

Oooooh oh no you didnt!

krudler · 23-08-2012 11:22PM

Maybe they just realise that most people are assholes with nothing worth talking about with and do their best to avoid interaction with the great unwashed at all costs.

The King of Moo · 23-08-2012 11:22PM

TeddyTedson wrote: »

Oh I know they can't help it.
And I'm one of the most tolerant people you'll ever meet (or not meet perhaps).

I stress I'm not talking about shy, nervous or people who are in any way anxious.
Such people could quite possibly come across perfectly in written format for example.
Think a la Alan Partridge.
Aha!

Specifically in terms of Alan Partridge alikes, those people just seem to be unable to perceive of other people's points of view. They can be very self-centred (not necessarily intentionally) and therefore not aware of how they might appear to others.
I know a few people like that. They're not aware if, for example, you want/need to get away from them when they're talking to you and keep rabbiting on. When you actually manage to get a word in edgeways, they don't listen to what you said and keep saying what they want to.

They're also unaware if they annoy people, and, perhaps most annoyingly, if they stand too close to someone.

I think it's just a particular mindset.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKRBYGhqI8Y

woodoo · 23-08-2012 11:22PM

Yeah autism, aspergers, social phobia, mental health problems etc are all reasons. Most people would like to be socially competent. Those that aren't can't help it i'd say.

B.A._Baracus · 23-08-2012 11:23PM

TeddyTedson wrote: »

What's with socially inept people? How are they so out touch with the majority of people that they have major difficulties communicating the simplest of things? I'm not talking about quiet or shy people here. But people how might have been in school, college or work with you who nobody could ever get.

I work with someone who is great at their job in a lot of ways and very intelligent. However them being socially inept basically makes them useless if they have to work with someone else together on something.
Their communication skills are utterly dire.

I actually think people like this need to be sent on course on how to work with people. They generally don't lack confidence or anything either in my experiences.
Socialising with them is often full of cringe worthy moments.
Is it nature or nurture?

Kinda coming off as a dick there, teddy.

You are talking about socially awkward people and who are you to say "oh these people should goto courses on how to work with people!" ... geez man.

TeddyTedson · 23-08-2012 11:24PM

krudler wrote: »

Maybe they just realise that most people are assholes with nothing worth talking about with and do their best to avoid interaction with the great unwashed at all costs.

The glass is

Half full
Half empty

?

I'm not talking about social hermits here.

Orizio · 23-08-2012 11:25PM

I prefer to call them culchies...

WumBuster · 23-08-2012 11:25PM

Where To wrote: »

What are you trying to say Teddy?

I think he's wondering why some people are arseholes.

TeddyTedson · 23-08-2012 11:26PM

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

Kinda coming off as a dick there, teddy.

You are talking about socially awkward people and who are you to say "oh these people should goto courses on how to work with people!" ... geez man.

I'm not talking about socially "awkward" people though.
I'm talking about people who are socially inept like real life Alan Paaaaartridges.

HalloweenJack · 23-08-2012 11:26PM

There are some people out there who just have no idea how to communicate effectively to people. It doesn't mean that they are shy or whatever, the best example I can think of is a very talkative guy.

However, he has no idea how to interact with people. He is really rude, interrupts everyone, wants all the attention, will joke about anything just to get a laugh and has no idea when not to joke (made a joke about a family member's alcoholism and another one's deteriorating mental health), loves winding people up, which isn't a problem in itself but there is a time and a place for it, e. g. deliberately winding-up his wife when she comes home from a tough day at work.

To me, this is socially inept. He has no idea of boundaries, manners or respect but gets his knickers in a knot when you treat him the same way he treats others.

EDIT: Just saw someone posted an Alan Partridge video, the similarities are almost too perfect!

WumBuster · 23-08-2012 11:31PM

here is a little quiz to find out if you are one of those 'socially inept' people or not, if anyones interested.

http://www.outofservice.com/self-monitor-censor-test/

Where To · 23-08-2012 11:36PM

WumBuster wrote: »

here is a little quiz to find out if you are one of those 'socially inept' people or not, if anyones interested.

http://www.outofservice.com/self-monitor-censor-test/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Flvxbw8YYM8

Gmol · 23-08-2012 11:42PM

Pace2008 wrote: »

If people are so bad that they can't even communicate in a team situation it sounds like they could possibly have a touch of autism.

/internet psychiatrist

Could be true apparently 1 in 10 guys are autistic prob undiagnosed

Lantus · 23-08-2012 11:42PM

woodoo wrote: »

Yeah autism, aspergers, social phobia, mental health problems etc are all reasons. Most people would like to be socially competent. Those that aren't can't help it i'd say.

Wrong, everyone is a product of their environment.

If you grow up in the deep south of america you have a southern accent and speak about oher racial groups in a certain manner.

If you were to grow up in nazi germany you would salute and believe that germany was above all others.

The problems in our society IMO are all environmental. No one is born with shyness or any other deficiency, they are learned, adopted and reflected in to us by our families, friends and society at large. One poster mentioned nature vs nurture, no such thing.

Gmol · 24-08-2012 12:23AM

No

Lantus wrote: »

woodoo wrote: »

Yeah autism, aspergers, social phobia, mental health problems etc are all reasons. Most people would like to be socially competent. Those that aren't can't help it i'd say.

Wrong, everyone is a product of their environment.

If you grow up in the deep south of america you have a southern accent and speak about oher racial groups in a certain manner.

If you were to grow up in nazi germany you would salute and believe that germany was above all others.

The problems in our society IMO are all environmental. No one is born with shyness or any other deficiency, they are learned, adopted and reflected in to us by our families, friends and society at large. One poster mentioned nature vs nurture, no such thing.

not true

marshbaboon · 24-08-2012 01:19AM

I'm the human incarnation of the socially awkward penguin. I'm just lucky I have enough humour to cover up the awkwardness.

Socially inept people

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