How much to give at a wedding

jclally · 18-08-2012 12:43PM #1

What do people think is the right amount to put in a wedding card?

I always used to give €200. We had three weddings in four weeks last year so cash was tight; the first two got €150. The third got €100 and I was really embarrassed giving it, though my girlfriend said it was plenty.

What would / do you give?

mauzo · 18-08-2012 12:44PM

I really need to get married! Cha Ching!

Colmustard · 18-08-2012 12:45PM

Nothing

Do what I do, just get a gift card and write on it "to "said couple" best wishes Colmustard" then they just think the present was lost or what someone else got them. It works a treat.

18-08-2012 12:46PM

havent been to many, one family one where i was doing the music so that was mine
100 would be more than enough imo though, not a chance i'd think of 200
and if you cant afford it, less

PK2008 · 18-08-2012 12:47PM

jclally wrote: »

What do people think is the right amount to put in a wedding card?

I always used to give €200. We had three weddings in four weeks last year so cash was tight; the first two got €150. The third got €100 and I was really embarrassed giving it, though my girlfriend said it was plenty.

What would / do you give?

100 bucks....Your GF is right; marry her......

....and then give her €50

Talib Fiasco · 18-08-2012 12:49PM

100-150 is more than enough. I'm not old enough to have to give serious presents at weddings but the parents would normally give 100-150 plus some sort of gift that they'd need in the future for their house or whatever.

Teyla Emmagan · 18-08-2012 12:52PM

€100 tops per person. I'm veering more towards €75 myself these days.

Weddings are a pain in the ar&e.

Balmed Out · 18-08-2012 12:53PM

Different areas of the country seem to do different things. I normally give 200 for a wedding invited as a couple but you dont have to. I doubt there's many who would expect it from everyone. People know that many cant affoard it. I got married recently and most gave 150 to 200 but there were plenty who gave 50 for a couple too and one couple who couldnt even make it gave 300. I wouldnt think anything of someone not giving x amount of money, a card is plenty if thats all you can afford.

They are inviting you because they want you to be a part of their big day, not because they want you to pay for it.

buck65 · 18-08-2012 12:57PM

€200

kylith · 18-08-2012 12:59PM

About €50.

admiralofthefleet · 18-08-2012 01:00PM

depends really. some family members gave us 400 while some friends gave us 50 so i think it depends on how close you are to the couple

maddragon · 18-08-2012 01:13PM

About three fiddy.

le la rat · 18-08-2012 01:20PM

I normally give wan mirrion dolrars

18-08-2012 01:20PM

Loads and loads on this in the wedding forum, but basically it comes down to two things:

1) What you can afford
2) How well you know them

As a couple, myself and the OH give €150, unless it's close family, where we give more.

Grayson · 18-08-2012 01:20PM

I heard the minimum was the price of the meal plus a little bit. So if it's a really swanky place, you're ****ed.

Lumbo · 18-08-2012 01:26PM

Grayson wrote: »

I heard the minimum was the price of the meal plus a little bit. So if it's a really swanky place, you're ****ed.

The price of the meal doesn't tend to be on the menu.

Melanoma · 18-08-2012 01:34PM

I gave two friends I introduced together 200 euro as it was like a double gift. This was just me going myself.

More normally I give 100 euro or 100 pound for a wedding in the north.

Recently I am under a lot of financial pressure so considered dropping to 80. I think couples would be annoyed if you did not cover a good percentage of the cost of the meal etc. 50 euro wouldn't but 75 would cover most of the nice stuff like dinner and band.

I think for a couple giving 150 is plenty really and up to 200 euro.

If you are getting a meal and entertainment (church, band, disco) its a good night out so like 50 euro would not really cover it. If I really get stuck I'd just say I can only make the afters and give between 30 and 50.

Worst comes to worst go the the afters and give no gift if you are totally broke as people can understand and just get a euro card in savers. I know if I was getting married I hate to think a mate couldn't come.

Galwayguy35 · 18-08-2012 01:37PM

jclally wrote: »

What do people think is the right amount to put in a wedding card?

I always used to give €200. We had three weddings in four weeks last year so cash was tight; the first two got €150. The third got €100 and I was really embarrassed giving it, though my girlfriend said it was plenty.

What would / do you give?

I give €100 and think that is more than enough, although the last invite I got I gave €50 as I couldn't go and I was invited on the same card that my brother got even though we live a few miles apart.

Super-Rush · 18-08-2012 01:38PM

200 fcuking euro?

Some of you don't deserve to have money.

loalae · 18-08-2012 01:42PM

50 euro is fine if that's all you can afford

meoklmrk91 · 18-08-2012 01:47PM

I recently went to the wedding of some good friends, I went on my own and I gave them €100, I think this is a fair amount, maybe if it's a couple an extra €50 is nice. The friends of mine didn't come out with anything after the hotel and other things were paid but they honestly didn't mind, the only thing they were miffed about was the fact that some guests who went to the whole wedding didn't even bother to give them a card nevermind put anything into it, this included some close family members, and there were quite a few. I would guess that there are a few of these at every wedding, so I wouldn't worry too much about not being able to afford the extra few bob.

Personally I would be mortified to go to a wedding empty handed, I understand that not everyone has something to put into a card but at the very least buy a card.

3ndahalfof6 · 18-08-2012 01:59PM

compose a song, tell them this is my special wedding gift to you on this wonderful day, then sing it to them,

now go drink the money you saved.

dr.bollocko · 18-08-2012 02:01PM

Super-Rush wrote: »

200 fcuking euro?

Some of you don't deserve to have money.

Shut up dude. We could make a fortune off this.

500 euro minimum I reckon.
And if you don't give that then just give them your car.

Red21 · 18-08-2012 02:02PM

The average irish wedding has turned into a kinda sham, if you're young you mightened be aware of this. Firstly from the age of 25-35 is when most people get married, so it stands to reason that for most of us, weddings are very few until you reach the age of 23/24 but when they start coming its like flood.For me the first 3/4 were grand but the novelty wore off pretty quick. How many weddings you have to attend generally depends more on your situation more than your popularity, for example if you work in a factory, play team sports,go out alot and have a large family when it comes to weddings, i'm afraid you're screwed, if your OH is similiar your life is over.
People may say "well you don't have to go" but it ain't always that simple, I've made up excuses for many weddings and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. The thing is, if you're invited to a workmates wedding and don't go, its not the end of the world but it can always a be a bit awkard afterwards, so I usually end up going and pretending to have a good time but really it pains me to spend so much money on such a load of sh#t.
I reckon the whole thing is a complete sham, usually the Bride and groom are such non-practicing catholic's that they shouldn't even be considered catholic. Then the rest of the day is just one big competition.Who's wedding is the best whos is most unique, and none of them are unique.Its a wedding why the hell do you want it to be unique?
The answer is, this is the very competition that goes on at these things.
Whos paying for this big competition, all those lucky enough to get an invite.
As for wedding gifts, you had little or no choice in that matter whatsoever in the past you put 100euro into the card if you're single and 200 euro for a couple, this was such the norm that not doing so would be like not having food at wedding reception, I must have been to 40+ weddings (:o:o:o yes I am that weak) it was always the same but thankfully the situation is changing.
Of course I don't agree with this, but what can you do.
It's like this, when im at a wedding I don't sit at the table complaining about expenses and what not, I smile and act like im having a ball. So when the bride comes round and says "hows it going" I say "wounderful great, i'm having a ball." But do you really think i had any choice in the matter? I mean what was I supposed to say, tell her the truth!
So im sure they are people who genuinely enjoy the day, you also gotta except from reading this thread and other threads about irish weddings they're also those who don't. It really annoys me when people say about their own wedding, something daft like "everyone enjoyed the day" you don't really know that. From the time the invite came in the post they're hands were tied when it came to: going to the wedding,putting money in the card and when asked if the enjoyed the day.
Simple solution to all this either go back to buying simple wedding gifts of cut down on the money that is being put into the wedding cards if we stop the money-train people we have wedding according to their means and i'll have an extra 5/6 weakends a year that i'm Free from this terrible affliction.

3ndahalfof6 · 18-08-2012 02:08PM

Red21 wrote: »

The average irish wedding has turned into a kinda sham, if you're young you mightened be aware of this. Firstly from the age of 25-35 is when most people get married, so it stands to reason that for most of us, weddings are very few until you reach the age of 23/24 but when they start coming its like flood.For me the first 3/4 were grand but the novelty wore off pretty quick. How many weddings you have to attend generally depends more on your situation more than your popularity, for example if you work in a factory, play team sports,go out alot and have a large family when it comes to weddings, i'm afraid you're screwed, if your OH is similiar your life is over.
People may say "well you don't have to go" but it ain't always that simple, I've made up excuses for many weddings and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't. The thing is, if you're invited to a workmates wedding and don't go, its not the end of the world but it can always a be a bit awkard afterwards, so I usually end up going and pretending to have a good time but really it pains me to spend so much money on such a load of sh#t.
I reckon the whole thing is a complete sham, usually the Bride and groom are such non-practicing catholic's that they shouldn't even be considered catholic. Then the rest of the day is just one big competition.Who's wedding is the best whos is most unique, and none of them are unique.Its a wedding why the hell do you want it to be unique?
The answer is, this is the very competition that goes on at these things.
Whos paying for this big competition, all those lucky enough to get an invite.
As for wedding gifts, you had little or no choice in that matter whatsoever in the past you put 100euro into the card if you're single and 200 euro for a couple, this was such the norm that not doing so would be like not having food at wedding reception, I must have been to 40+ weddings (:o:o:o yes I am that weak) it was always the same but thankfully the situation is changing.
Of course I don't agree with this, but what can you do.
It's like this, when im at a wedding I don't sit at the table complaining about expenses and what not, I smile and act like im having a ball. So when the bride comes round and says "hows it going" I say "wounderful great, i'm having a ball." But do you really think i had any choice in the matter? I mean what was I supposed to say, tell her the truth!
So im sure they are people who genuinely enjoy the day, you also gotta except from reading this thread and other threads about irish weddings they're also those who don't. It really annoys me when people say about their own wedding, something daft like "everyone enjoyed the day" you don't really know that. From the time the invite came in the post they're hands were tied when it came to: going to the wedding,putting money in the card and when asked if the enjoyed the day.
Simple solution to all this either go back to buying simple wedding gifts of cut down on the money that is being put into the wedding cards if we stop the money-train people we have wedding according to their means and i'll have an extra 5/6 weakends a year that i'm Free from this terrible affliction.

on your first wedding give no present, of course you will become the talk of the town, but the invites will stop.

Grayson · 18-08-2012 02:08PM

Lumbo wrote: »

The price of the meal doesn't tend to be on the menu.

But you still have an idea. most places are 40-60 per head. swankier places will be up to 100 a head. So when you're giving a gift, it's supposed to be enough to cover the cost of them inviting you, plus a little bit extra so It's actually a gift.

18-08-2012 02:23PM

Are you supposed to give a gift/money if you are attending the afters only?

I have my friend's brother's wedding coming up but only going to the afters. No idea what the done thing is. I haven't been to a wedding since I was 10 years old.

finbarrk · 18-08-2012 02:28PM

€150 is loads for a couple these days. Even €100 would do some of them depending on how well you know them.

finbarrk · 18-08-2012 02:29PM

Super-Rush wrote: »

200 fcuking euro?

Some of you don't deserve to have money.

What was the most you got at your wedding?

Red21 · 18-08-2012 02:30PM

3ndahalfof6 wrote: »

on your first wedding give no present, of course you will become the talk of the town, but the invites will stop.

Yes something like this is what I shoulda done, but you always think, "ahh sure i've only five or six i've got left to go to thats it they'll be few and far between after that" but the invites just keep coming, far more than people ever realise.
This might sound thinly veiled im so popular..., it's not, when wedding invites for large weddings are being sent out people tend to send them in groups, everyone in the office, everyone in the team, everyone on my shift etc.

Snowie · 18-08-2012 02:32PM

dr.bollocko wrote: »

Shut up dude. We could make a fortune off this.

500 euro minimum I reckon.
And if you don't give that then just give them your car.

So its true you really are a woman :pac:

How much to give at a wedding

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