On the Dole-A Deal Breaker

A_Sober_Paddy · 25-06-2012 02:13AM #1

Hey all,

Just looking for a women's perspective on this. If you met a man on a night out and ye got on well and had a great night together, exchange numbers, go back to his or whatever...

So you've decided that you like this man and you'd really like to met him again, so ye arrange to meet up and have a date, over the course of this date it comes to light that his unemployed and on the dole.

The minute you hear his on the dole/not working...Are you not interested in him any more? Is it unattractive to you that his not working?

I'm just very curious to see what ye think?

Ickle Magoo · 25-06-2012 02:16AM

Re-opened and moved to AH @ OP's request

Fluorescence · 25-06-2012 11:27AM

No, loads of people are in this position right now. If he was on the dole with no intention of finding work then yes, it'd be a turn-off. If he's been laid off and is doing everything in his power to find a job then what business of it is mine?

PizzamanIRL · 25-06-2012 11:31AM

Shouldn't judge until you find out why/how long they're on the dole. Did they just get cut from work or are they just lazy on the dole the last 3 years?

Duggy747 · 25-06-2012 11:31AM

I wouldn't get with a girl if she had an opinion looking down on those on the dole.

Would be different if the person was a career-doler and hadn't looked for work in over 3,000 years.

FatherLen · 25-06-2012 11:31AM

yeah because AH needs more dole threads.

chin_grin · 25-06-2012 11:31AM

"Gotta have a j.o.b, if you wanna be with me...."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XecTPWJu0wk

westendgirlie · 25-06-2012 11:32AM

At this present moment in time, a single woman would be narrowing her choices greatly if she only wanted a fella that was working.

A d1ck is a d1ck in my opinion. Having a job won't change that.

Hardonraging · 25-06-2012 11:34AM

westendgirlie wrote: »

At this present moment in time, a single woman would be narrowing her choices greatly if she only wanted a fella that was working.

A d1ck is a d1ck in my opinion. Having a job won't change that.

Flash the cash... guaranteed a ride out of it, them dole chick's love it when you make it rain !!

shopaholic01 · 25-06-2012 11:34AM

You would have to be very shallow to think like that, unless as other poster have said he views being on the dole as a career.

So many people are unemployed now, it must be demoralising enough without having girls knock you back over it.

Meauldsegosha · 25-06-2012 11:34AM

I know some people will think I'm very shallow but someone who is long termed unemployed and is not actively seeking employment or retraining would be a turn off for me.

Dravokivich · 25-06-2012 11:38AM

I'm just gonna say yes, because this thread has come up a lot lately.

Hopefully that'll make it go away.

shopaholic01 · 25-06-2012 11:39AM

Hardonraging wrote: »

Flash the cash... guaranteed a ride out of it, them dole chick's love it when you make it rain !!

Every cloud eh?

Hardonraging · 25-06-2012 11:42AM

shopaholic01 wrote: »

Every cloud eh?

Gotta be on the ball(s)

But seriously, no if i met and a girl and she was on the dole i'd not pass any remarks, in fact now that i think about it, i have date's a woman who was on and off the dole .. still is, but she's out there, working a bit when she can get jobs..

Merkin · 25-06-2012 11:45AM

Of course it wouldn't be a deal breaker. I would want to know WHY he was on the dole though. There's a big difference between someone who is out of work because they simply have been unlucky in finding a job and someone who spends the day scratching their arse, knocking back the Dutch Gold inanyways and watching Jeremy Kyle for kicks.

4zn76tysfajdxp · 25-06-2012 11:49AM

Merkin wrote: »

someone who spends the day scratching their arse, knocking back the Dutch Gold inanyways and watching Jeremy Kyle for kicks.

Livin' the dream...

*sighs*

Hardonraging · 25-06-2012 11:50AM

Merkin wrote: »

Of course it wouldn't be a deal breaker. I would want to know WHY he was on the dole though. There's a big difference between someone who is out of work because they simply have been unlucky in finding a job and someone who spends the day scratching their arse, knocking back the Dutch Gold inanyways and watching Jeremy Kyle for kicks.

In fairness you cant really beat a bit of JK tho ...

Lollipops23 · 25-06-2012 11:53AM

Nope, my OH had to sign on shortly after we got together (in the very early stages of the relationship) and it didn't affect my views of him. Of course, he was avidly looking for a job the whole time, so that probably helped my perception of him. He's much more career-orientated than me too.

Merkin · 25-06-2012 11:58AM

Hardonraging wrote: »

In fairness you cant really beat a bit of JK tho ...

:eek: It makes me beat my breast, wail and bemoan the demise of civilization as we know it to be fair. I feel safer with Judge Judy.

Shenshen · 25-06-2012 11:59AM

A_Sober_Paddy wrote: »

Hey all,

Just looking for a women's perspective on this. If you met a man on a night out and ye got on well and had a great night together, exchange numbers, go back to his or whatever...

So you've decided that you like this man and you'd really like to met him again, so ye arrange to meet up and have a date, over the course of this date it comes to light that his unemployed and on the dole.

The minute you hear his on the dole/not working...Are you not interested in him any more? Is it unattractive to you that his not working?

I'm just very curious to see what ye think?

I would need a bit more information there... if he was on the dole because he recently lost his job and is looking for a new one, I wouldn't have a problem with that at all.

If it transpired that he had been on the dole for 4 years now, and has no plans on going back to work, that would be a deal breaker.

25-06-2012 12:00PM

It really bothers me when people look down on me for being on the Dole. Though, having said that, it's a good litmus test; anyone that is quick as to judge someone for something like that really doesn't deserve my time.

LETHAL LADY · 25-06-2012 12:01PM

But how can he afford a night out if he is on the dole? What did they talk about on the first date? So many questions.

ash23 · 25-06-2012 12:04PM

Like the others, if there is a good reason (redundancy etc) then it wouldn't bother me and I have dated people before who were unemployed.

If they are making a career out of being unemployed or if they live at home with mammy and always have, I would run screaming from the building.

Pedant · 25-06-2012 12:05PM

Didn't we have a thread very similar to this only one or two weeks ago?

Maybe it's just Déjà vu on my part.

notsobusy · 25-06-2012 12:07PM

I voted No but it would depend on the circumstances, like if he was genuinely looking for work I wouldn't have a problem but if he wasn't actively looking then yes I would have a problem with continuing a relationship!

westendgirlie · 25-06-2012 12:08PM

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

But how can he afford a night out if he is on the dole? What did they talk about on the first date? So many questions.

It was all pillow talk m'lady!

shopaholic01 · 25-06-2012 12:09PM

LETHAL LADY wrote: »

But how can he afford a night out if he is on the dole? What did they talk about on the first date? So many questions.

Well maybe you could pay?

As for conversation, if I went on a date and all he spoke about was work I would leave fairly quickly. Work is a means to an end - it's purpose should be to finance your life as opposed to being the purpose of your life.

boomkatalog · 25-06-2012 12:09PM

The dole in itself is not a turn off, its all about circumstances. If someones goal in life is to drink, live at the back of their mams house and draw the dole forever to pay for cans and weed then yeah, that's a turn off, but that's not everyone on the dole! And while I believe in each to their own, that's not what I'd want in a partner.

Father Damo · 25-06-2012 12:13PM

Whateva happened to just fallin in love wit a nigga wit a bus pass! :pac:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iiU2omjqg9A

A_Sober_Paddy · 25-06-2012 12:16PM

Let me introduce to characters:

Character A:
Dole: Yes
Seeking Work: Yes, (but not willing to take a sh!t job, looking for a job that won't be soul destroying)
Spends Spare Time: Exercising, Very occasional drinking.

Character B:
Dole: Yes
Seeking Work: Yes, any job will do.
Spends Spare Time: Rarely Exercises & Drinks at least once a week.

Are both these characters turn off's or just one or the other?

LETHAL LADY · 25-06-2012 12:17PM

shopaholic01 wrote: »

Well maybe you could pay?

As for conversation, if I went on a date and all he spoke about was work I would leave fairly quickly. Work is a means to an end - it's purpose should be to finance your life as opposed to being the purpose of your life.

Thanks for the advice, I must forget to remember that the next time.;)

On the Dole-A Deal Breaker

Is the dole a turnoff 142 votes

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