Cheer up :)

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 12:55AM #1

Right, new to posting here, and judging by the banter here probably not the most ideal place to post but here goes

Sitting here, wallowing in self pity, due to some personal issues, I had just thought to myself, while thinking of people who are in alot worse situation than I am, that it could be alot worse.

Thinking of my position and my problems in life now, I think about the people who had everything and lost it all. Not talking about money, but people who had a caring and loving wife, good steady job, health, everything. And lose it all because of an accident, health issues etc.

There was a program on t.v not long ago, about a girl who had been married to a fella for 10 years. She was stunning. Young, was only early 30's and got married to her childhood sweetheart at 20-ish.

Woke up one morning after a night out and was paralysed from the waist down due to some strange spinal disorder she had got, can't really recall what it was now, nor the program. Anyway, her husband had left her. And she was heartbroken and decided to try dating again. But I can only imagine, her pain as she struggled to come to terms with everything going on in her life and losing it all. My heart really went out to her, and I thought of that poor woman while I was feeling sorry for myself. Selfish eh?

So to all you out there feeling depressed during these hard times, stop and think about it for a minute. It could be alot worse.

Cheer up

im invisible · 18-05-2012 01:06AM

and now im going to bed depressed thinking about this ****! i was grand until i read this thread OP, thanks:mad:

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 01:08AM

I'm sorry, but don't be, you could have a hell of a lot more to be depressed about.

Smile and sleep well

Pandora2 · 18-05-2012 01:10AM

Had to spend a couple of days in Our Lady's with my youngest child a few years back. Did a lot of walking the halls and I defy anyone to take a walk round there and come back and tell me how tough they've got it.

My Mum used to say, put 12 people round a table and have them throw their troubles in the middle, you'd be the first to take your own back!! Smart lady;)

K-9 · 18-05-2012 01:10AM

I know somebody whose husband was killed in an accident. Has 2 kids to get through confirmation and communion.

Far worse than off than the OP.

Bipolar Joe · 18-05-2012 01:11AM

Fuck off.

Jaxxy · 18-05-2012 01:15AM

Pandora2 wrote: »

My Mum used to say, put 12 people round a table and have them throw their troubles in the middle, you'd be the first to take your own back!! Smart lady;)

I love that. I'm robbing it!

starviewadams · 18-05-2012 01:15AM

Feeling depressed?

Cheer up sure,don't be so moany,don't be ruining everybody else's buzz,sure you're only an attention seeker,a drama queen.Nothing wrong with you,sure what do you have to be depressed about?

Sounds like my dad when I told him I'd been diagnosed with depression.

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 01:16AM

Pandora2 wrote: »

Had to spend a couple of days in Our Lady's with my youngest child a few years back. Did a lot of walking the halls and I defy anyone to take a walk round there and come back and tell me how tough they've got it.

My Mum used to say, put 12 people round a table and have them throw their troubles in the middle, you'd be the first to take your own back!! Smart lady;)

She sounds smart, I think I'll use that saying in future. Hope your youngest is ok now

Domo230 wrote: »

I wasn't depressed until I read that OP.

Sorry

K-9 wrote: »

I know somebody whose husband was killed in an accident. Has 2 kids to get through confirmation and communion.

Far worse than off than the OP.

I have no doubt in my mind there is worse out there, I just mentioned the above as a situation worse than my own. I'm sure alot of people can relate.

My thoughts are with that person.

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

Fuck off.

Nice name.

RachaelVO · 18-05-2012 01:18AM

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

Fuck off.

Ah now, there's no need for that, Bipolar or no Bipolar! FFS!

You go OP, you're right, things could be worse... in some parts of the world childrens are dying from shitty preventable diseases and their parents are left devastated! You're bang on, half the time we don't know how luck we really fecking well are

Scioch · 18-05-2012 01:19AM

Yeah always someone worse off. Thinking on it too helps ya stop wallowing in your own self pity.

Thats the theory anyway. But I am quite fond of wallowing.

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 01:20AM

RachaelVO wrote: »

Ah now, there's no need for that, Bipolar or no Bipolar! FFS!

You go OP, you're right, things could be worse... in some parts of the world childrens are dying from shitty preventable diseases and their parents are left devastated! You're bang on, half the time we don't know how luck we really fecking well are

Thanks Rachael, felt it was something I had to say, sorry if this isn't the right place.

But you have hit the nail on the head there.

Live. Laugh. Enjoy

F1ngers · 18-05-2012 01:20AM

Bluegrass wrote: »

There was a program on t.v not long ago, about a girl who had been married to a fella for 10 years. She was stunning. Young, was only early 30's and got married to her childhood sweetheart at 20-ish.

Woke up one morning after a night out and was paralysed from the waist down due to some strange spinal disorder she had got, can't really recall what it was now, nor the program. Anyway, her husband had left her. And she was heartbroken and decided to try dating again. But I can only imagine, her pain as she struggled to come to terms with everything going on in her life and losing it all. My heart really went out to her, and I thought of that poor woman while I was feeling sorry for myself. Selfish eh?

So to all you out there feeling depressed during these hard times, stop and think about it for a minute. It could be alot worse.

Cheer up

True, she could have been a quadraplegic.
She got real lucky there.

PucaMama · 18-05-2012 01:21AM

Telling someone who suffers from depression to cheer up is very insulting op I dont need a major life changein event to justify it.

guitarzero · 18-05-2012 01:22AM

I think its gas how we try to use other peoples misery to feel better.

"It could be worse, I could be you, mr bum man with no home on the streets tonight" *clicks heals and away*

Bipolar Joe · 18-05-2012 01:22AM

Like Starviewadams posted, this view is bull. It's akin to saying your sadness means nothing. Sure, why are those people upset? At least they're not starving to death. Sure, why are the people starving to death upset? At least they have all their limbs. Sure, why are the starving, limbless people upset? At least they can still watch Fair City with their 100% working eyes. The worst thing you can say to someone who's depressed is "Cheer up."

RachaelVO · 18-05-2012 01:23AM

PucaMama wrote: »

Telling someone who suffers from depression to cheer up is very insulting op I dont need a major life changein event to justify it.

Not too sure that's what he meant to be fair...

Depression is depression, and it's something VERY different.

I think what he meant is more the fact that we all have our crosses to bear, but some have it worse, and maybe... just maybe we should look at the pro list and not the cons list

Just saying is all!

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 01:25AM

guitarzero wrote: »

I think its gas how we try to use other peoples misery to feel better.

"It could be worse, I could be you, mr bum man with no home on the streets tonight" *clicks heals and away*

I'm not using anybodies misery to make myself feel better. I'm seeing my situation from another perspective and thinking I don't have it as bad as I make it out to be sometimes. Maybe I do, maybe people see how I feel and think "Damn, I'm alot better off"..

Who know's?

And to the above poster who said asking someone who is depressed to cheer up.

I've been diagnosed with depression, and for once, feel I should cheer up a little, I too have been through an awful lot I don't wish to or need to address publicly.
Sorry if I have offended you in trying to make others see a little light in their lives.

Corkfeen · 18-05-2012 01:26AM

I have to agree with Bipolar, this just reinforces this Irish logic that people with depression don't have it so bad so shouldn't have it. While '**** off' may have seemed harsh, I understand the rationale. Depression is not simply being upset and is far more complex, it is a real illness and you can't just argue that other ailments are worse...

Ficheall · 18-05-2012 01:28AM

A nice bluegrass cover for the OP:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HPutbENepXQ

PucaMama · 18-05-2012 01:28AM

RachaelVO wrote: »

PucaMama wrote: »

Telling someone who suffers from depression to cheer up is very insulting op I dont need a major life changein event to justify it.

Not too sure that's what he meant to be fair...

Depression is depression, and it's something VERY different.

I think what he meant is more the fact that we all have our crosses to bear, but some have it worse, and maybe... just maybe we should look at the pro list and not the cons list

Just saying is all!

I understand but diagnosed or not 'cheer up' isnt the way to deal with it. And people who think it is only make it harder. Your mental health is important.

RachaelVO · 18-05-2012 01:28AM

Bipolar Joe wrote: »

Like Starviewadams posted, this view is bull. It's akin to saying your sadness means nothing. Sure, why are those people upset? At least they're not starving to death. Sure, why are the people starving to death upset? At least they have all their limbs. Sure, why are the starving, limbless people upset? At least they can still watch Fair City with their 100% working eyes. The worst thing you can say to someone who's depressed is "Cheer up."

You're some barrel of ****ing laughs aren't ya?

The point is, is that there is always something to appreciate and when you look at some aspect of your life you can say, well yeah, I did good, or I have it good. Christ on a bike, there are times and I wonder how the fuck we're gonna pay the bills, but I have always figured it out so far, and then I look at my kids, and I think well, they're healthy and to date they are pretty all rounded happy kids, I've fuck all to be whinging about...

THATS THE POINT

im invisible · 18-05-2012 01:30AM

I was just trying for a few thanks with my first post there, to be fair to the OP, i don't s/he was trying to equate feeling a bit depressed, with suffering from depression

RachaelVO · 18-05-2012 01:31AM

PucaMama wrote: »

I understand but diagnosed or not 'cheer up' isnt the way to deal with it. And people who think it is only make it harder. Your mental health is important.

The point is, he's not telling people with depression to cheer up... the majority of people realise the depression is not that simple. You're neither happy or sad, you're just empty! This is a whole other, not debate as such, but outlook, for people who do piddle all but whinge and moan. And TBF the majority of people with depression hide it very well from people on "the outside" if that makes any sense

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 01:31AM

RachaelVO wrote: »

You're some barrel of ****ing laughs aren't ya?

The point is, is that there is always something to appreciate and when you look at some aspect of your life you can say, well yeah, I did good, or I have it good. Christ on a bike, there are times and I wonder how the fuck we're gonna pay the bills, but I have always figured it out so far, and then I look at my kids, and I think well, they're healthy and to date they are pretty all rounded happy kids, I've fuck all to be whinging about...

THATS THE POINT

Agree with this 100%. My point exactly. Thank you Rachael

strobe · 18-05-2012 01:31AM

Bluegrass wrote: »

There was a program on t.v not long ago, about a girl who had been married to a fella for 10 years. She was stunning. Young, was only early 30's and got married to her childhood sweetheart at 20-ish.

Woke up one morning after a night out and was paralysed from the waist down due to some strange spinal disorder she had got, can't really recall what it was now, nor the program. Anyway, her husband had left her. And she was heartbroken and decided to try dating again.

The show was called 'The Undateables', it was on Ch4 and is prob up on their player. It was actually quite good for a variety of reasons. Worth a watch.

Bipolar Joe · 18-05-2012 01:31AM

RachaelVO wrote: »

You're some barrel of ****ing laughs aren't ya?

No, I'm a miserablist.

RachaelVO wrote: »

The point is, is that there is always something to appreciate and when you look at some aspect of your life you can say, well yeah, I did good, or I have it good. Christ on a bike, there are times and I wonder how the fuck we're gonna pay the bills, but I have always figured it out so far, and then I look at my kids, and I think well, they're healthy and to date they are pretty all rounded happy kids, I've fuck all to be whinging about...

THATS THE POINT

Here's hoping you never develop a soul-crushing mental illness. HIGH FIVE!!!

Posy · 18-05-2012 01:32AM

But it can be nice to wallow in a bit of self-pity for a while.

There will almost always be someone worse off than yourself, but that doesn't particularly make someone who's upset feel better. Sometimes it can just make someone else feel that you think their problems are not worth caring about.
But sometimes it can help to put your problems into perspective.

guitarzero · 18-05-2012 01:33AM

I think its good to get a fresh perspective on things, often folks views can be quite flawed. But, the inner aspect of peoples lives can often be no reflection of their outer projection. Its this murky, obscure area that truly shows that the conditions of happiness and sadness is not really subject to anything which can often make you feel helpless.

aaronjumper · 18-05-2012 01:34AM

Everything is better with ice cream.

Bluegrass · 18-05-2012 01:34AM

strobe wrote: »

The show was called 'The Undateables', it was on Ch4 and is prob up on their player. It was actually quite good for a variety of reasons. Worth a watch.

That's the one! Thank you.

Posy wrote: »

But it can be nice to wallow in a bit of self-pity for a while.
There will almost always be someone worse off than yourself, but that doesn't particularly make someone who's upset feel better. Sometimes it can just make someone else feel that you think their problems are not worth caring about.
But sometimes it can help to put your problems into perspective.

It can be, but it does one no good most of the time. But that's what I was getting at, you summed it up pretty good there Posy, thanks

Cheer up :)

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