Things about Ireland that

crfcaio · 06-04-2012 05:13AM #1

foreigners MUST know before going there.

Of what should I be aware?

Enlighten me, AH.

old_aussie · 06-04-2012 05:16AM

The place is full of US haters and drunks

crfcaio · 06-04-2012 05:18AM

I'm glad I wasn't raised here :rolleyes:

Next.

buyer95 · 06-04-2012 05:22AM

We are a welcoming enough folk, who take the whole tea drinking thing to a new level

im invisible · 06-04-2012 05:34AM

Its cold and wet, anything above 14 degrees will get people out shirtless trying to get a bit of a tan, which is pointless on Irish skin, it just can't handle it.

scorpioishere · 06-04-2012 05:35AM

* Some of the irish are smelly
* Irish streets are full of piss and **** over the week end
* Some irish kids doesn't knw how to behave in public.

Chuck Stone · 06-04-2012 06:22AM

You should know that there is quite a lot of self-loathing Irish on forums such as this who can only see what's wrong with this country.

Paradoxically the majority of these self-loathers are likely to be socially retarded hermit-folk so don't experience much outside the cyber world. You can spot these hermit-folk by observing how they communicate with real humans i.e. by hissing loudly when they dislike something and hissing gently when they like something.

Irish people have good points and bad points just like anywhere else in the world. On the whole I'd say we're a grand bunch of lads.

haminka · 06-04-2012 07:40AM

I like Ireland - with the exception of the highly dysfunctional and parasitic public service and health service and binge drinking. Someone should give me a couple of logical reasons why they go out, get drunk till they are sick and can't remember anything and spend the next day incapacitated.
Other than that, it's a great country. You get morons like everywhere else. You get nice people like everywhere else.
Oh, I totally forgot the biggest grief I have with Ireland. No ice-hockey. GAA just doesn't cut it, sorry guys.

tvc15 · 06-04-2012 07:47AM

haminka wrote: »

Someone should give me a couple of logical reasons why they go out, get drunk till they are sick and can't remember anything and spend the next day incapacitated..

For the craic

Not everything has to make sense

Cork Lass · 06-04-2012 07:48AM

The one thing I really like about Ireland is that those who dislike it/are glad they were not raised here have the freedom to leave anytime they choose.

MyKeyG · 06-04-2012 07:49AM

scorpioishere wrote: »

* Some of the irish are smelly
* Irish streets are full of piss and **** over the week end
* Some irish kids doesn't knw how to behave in public.

That could be any town in the UK! It's not just exclusive to Ireland.

MyKeyG · 06-04-2012 07:50AM

Cork Lass wrote: »

The one thing I really like about Ireland is that those who dislike it/are glad they were not raised here have the freedom to leave anytime they choose.

Best post I've seen in a while.

deelite · 06-04-2012 07:53AM

"Just a five minute walk up the road" generally means a 5 mile walk

Fiona · 06-04-2012 08:17AM

deelite wrote: »

"Just a five minute walk up the road" generally means a 5 mile walk

So true!!

And 20 mins is really 45 mins.

And never refuse a cup of tea, it will upset the person offering it

MyKeyG · 06-04-2012 08:29AM

mrs crilly wrote: »

And never refuse a cup of tea, it will upset the person offering it

But I have this rare medical condition. If I drink tea there's a good chance I'll die!

newmug · 06-04-2012 08:38AM

Remeber this: The english are our mortal enemy, much like the germans are to the Polish, and the taliban is to America. Never, EVER, EVER, say we look / behave / speak like the english. Never ask why we dont speak our own language, or why some people follow english soccer teams. You will just be inviting unnescessary punishment upon yourself if you do.

mikemac1 · 06-04-2012 08:44AM

Midnight mass is not at midnight

The Irish Mammy rules everything and no girl is good enough for her son

Obsession with car reg plates
"Heard you got a new car, what kind is it?"
"Oh it's a 12 reg"
"I didn't ask you that "

Try explaining to a French person that you're taking the car for a "spin" :cool:

We elect crooks and admire the lovable rogues.;)
Tory party fundraising scandal = English crooks, same thing in Ireland = cute hoor

Everyone knows League of Ireland football is ****e even if you've never been to a game in your life

We have red lemonade, the Brits don't have that ha.

All crisps are Taytos and that's the way it will remain

MugMugs · 06-04-2012 08:46AM

If you meet a fella wearing a Nike Shell Suit and Nike Air Max with his baseball cap peaked up to the heavens and shouting "Brits out" Take the time to ask him why he wants this.

I can guarantee you that he will be able to tell you that we were occupied by them at one stage in our lives and that's where his knowledge of the situation will end.

If you see a group of girls wearing PJ's, don't be alarmed, we just call them scuzz balls... If they become aggressive toward you then offer them a John Player Blue, that'll calm them down enough for you to escape.

Take my advice, Fly into Dublin Airport, Take the Bus to the train station and go either West or South West.

Deus Ex Machina · 06-04-2012 08:48AM

There are actually more guns in Ireland than America. You'll be shot at very frequently. A lot of people strut around with these big fuçk off Roman shields to protect themselves. If you lower your shield however it's seen as welcoming fellatio, so you're often between a rock and a hard place.

Fratton Fred · 06-04-2012 08:49AM

crfcaio wrote: »

foreigners MUST know before going there.

Of what should I be aware?

Enlighten me, AH.

From what I have managed to deduce, there are two types of Irish people, Dubs and non Dubs.

If you are a Dub, you consider yourself sophisticated, well educated and your taxes carry the rest of the country. All of those not from Dublin are culchie pig farmers who haven't noticed that it is now the 21st century.

If you are a non Dub, you hate Dubs because they are all junkies and drug dealers who want to be British.

The only exception to this is Cork. Cork people hate everyone not from Cork and everyone not from Cork hate Cork people.

There are no poor drivers in Ireland 50% of the population are average to good drivers, the other 50% are absolutely terrible. These are people who stop whilst trying to join a motorway, or can squeeze their Nissan micro into three parking spaces.

Irish pubs will often do table service, which trumps penicillin as the greatest thing ever invented.

Don't go to Cavan, you will regret it.

smash · 06-04-2012 08:52AM

crfcaio wrote: »

foreigners MUST know before going there.

Of what should I be aware?

Enlighten me, AH.

Irish girls love anal, it's always wise to carry around a tub a Vaseline and some poppers.

Sunnyisland · 06-04-2012 08:56AM

scorpioishere wrote: »

* Some of the irish are smelly
* Irish streets are full of piss and **** over the week end
* Some irish kids doesn't knw how to behave in public.

And some cant spell correctly

mikemac1 · 06-04-2012 08:58AM

You can judge a person by their car reg

Take a rural county reg to a dealer and prepare for the sharp intake of breath :rolleyes:

All D reg cars were driven on superb roads and never had harsh treatment
Everywhere else were used to tow trailers of pigs to the mart and rallied on boreens.
And then the dealer will insult you with the offer.

God help you if you are young and take a DL reg to a dealer for a trade in.
Everyone knows that Donegal is full of boyracers and loons :eek:

Thou shall never ever buy a reg from those boyos in the next county
Do you see many Clare regs in North Tipp?
No you don't and you never will
Up Tipp, Tipp for Liam :cool:

Zebra3 · 06-04-2012 09:05AM

crfcaio wrote: »

foreigners MUST know before going there.

Of what should I be aware?

Enlighten me, AH.

Watch the clips of the Savage Eye on Youtube.

All fully explained there and totally truthful.

mikemac1 · 06-04-2012 09:06AM

The greatest insult in rural Ireland is to be called a blow-in

Realy unless you own land and can go back three generations in the parish you'll still be a blow-in

The Mammy came from a neighbouring county before getting married and the old biddies still pass comments that's she not from the parish
Not meant in a bad way but it's snide and narky all the same

Now you're not going to see this in Meath, Kildare, Co. Cork and Limerick and other places with estates for commuters going to cities

I'm talking about real rural Ireland where there are no estates, one church, one shop and four pubs in the village

Mint Sauce · 06-04-2012 09:11AM

Pubs are closed on Good Friday and Christams day.

Zebra3 · 06-04-2012 09:11AM

mikemac1 wrote: »

The greatest insult in rural Ireland is to be called a blow-in

Realy unless you own land and can go back three generations in the parish you'll still be a blow-in

The Mammy came from a neighbouring county before getting married and the old biddies still pass comments that's she not from the parish
Not meant in a bad way but it's snide and narky all the same

So it is meant in a bad way.

mikemac1 · 06-04-2012 09:12AM

I explained it badly

Just old biddies set in their ways
Not a vicious insult realy, just something they've always said

Not a big deal

newmug · 06-04-2012 09:13AM

mikemac1 wrote: »

Now you're not going to see this in Meath, Kildare, Co. Cork and Limerick and other places with estates for commuters going to cities

I'm talking about real rural Ireland where there are no estates, one church, one shop and four pubs in the village

Yes you blodywell are! Probably the most clannish, and definately most rural county in Ireland, dubs are NOT welcome.

emeraldstar · 06-04-2012 09:15AM

mikemac1 wrote: »

All crisps are Taytos and that's the way it will remain

False.

mattjack · 06-04-2012 09:19AM

crfcaio wrote: »

foreigners MUST know before going there.

Of what should I be aware?

Enlighten me, AH.

Use the words 'begorrah' and 'top of the morning' regularly, you'll fit in perfectly.Also make sure sure you register for the 'taking a piss' tax.

Things about Ireland that

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