Dirty Stories from people's houses

Nothing worse than heading up to someone's jax and being confronted by what looks like a Vindaloo compacted into the U-Bend.

I volunteered to go pick some urgent letter up at a co-workers apartment. He gave me the key and the address and I let myself in.

I immediately got stuck on the hall floor. It was like flypaper with filth. I wrenched my feet off and went into the kitchen where I was told I'd find the letter on the kitchen table. There were hundreds of letters on the kitchen table, and burnt pots with congealed and mouldy contents on the stove, and a kitchen sink filled with disgusting plates in what looked like gravy and smelled like dysentery.

I was actually retching with the smell and the thought of someone living in the middle of it. The final straw was the mousetrap with the decomposed mouse in it by the kitchen bin. There were bluebottles flying all over the place.

I've never been able to look at that guy the same again, and I'm uncomfortable knowing about his secret life of squalor. When I got back to the office, he said he hoped I didn't mind the mess. He wasn't the least bit embarrassed.

Funny thing is he looks clean and doesn't smell bad. I would have pictured someone who lives like that as being disheveled and unkempt, but you would really never know to look at him.

There used to be an old man who lived not too far from me. He passed on a few years ago but the tales of what he got up to in his house were legendary.
I'm not too sure if all the stories are true but a neighbour has sworn that they are as she saw them firsthand.

He would use the same teabag for a week. Keeping it in the fridge between usage.

He never bothered to take the ashes out from the fire. Instead he would wait until they cooled and scatter them under the carpet.

He once ran out of toilet paper so proceeded to tear down some wallpaper and use it.

There was an incident with his mattress so he would sleep on a big stockpile of clothes scattered around his bedroom.

Instead of framing pictures, he would just cut out stuff from the newspapers and stick them around the house. In his sitting room was a picture of John Major. When questioned why his response was "he looks a little bit like my father".

He never cleaned out his toilets. Every few months he'd take a hose from out the back and flood the entire bathroom. That was his idea of clean.

One day the cattle from a near field went missing. Where did they show up? Your mans house. They were hanging around the place for weeks.

His dog used to be in the house the whole time. I'm sure someone told me he wasn't housebroken and I bet this guy wouldn't have been bothered cleaning up after him.

He was a chain smoker and never bothered with an ashtray "as it was too much work to be cleaning and emptying"

His garage was full of old stuff. Had never been cleaned out. One day someone robbed some stuff as there were rumour that there was some antiques there. Your man didn't care though as he would have been too lazy to go through the stockpile.

The windows were never cleaned. You couldn't see out of them.

I'm sure there's more too.

JR6 wrote: »

when i was in college.... there were 7 of us living in the house and we rarely cleaned. Instead of washing the dishes, we simply scraped off the old dried-in food and covered the plates/knives/forks in tin-foil! We were then ready to eat again!!

Thats possibly the most disgusting, laziest, thing I've ever known anyone to admit to.

How can that possibly be easier than washing a plate?

Giselle wrote: »

Thats possibly the most disgusting, laziest, thing I've ever known anyone to admit to.

How can that possibly be easier than washing a plate?

spending 5 seconds with some tinfoil sounds a lot easier than scrubbing caked in dirt tbh.

not that i would condone such a thing :pac:

I dont know what a tracker mortgage is

swear filter^