Mr/Ms Right or Mr/Ms Right Now?

Frank Black · 22-02-2012 12:15AM #1

Now I'm lucky that I met my wife when we were in our early 20's, we went out for years before getting engaged/married/had kids.

I've noticed that as I've got older (mid 30's) that my single friends spend far less time before committing.

A friend of mine recently got engaged to a girl who he has been going out with for less than 6 months.

While I'm delighted for him, I can't help wondering if you can really know if you've found 'the one' after this amount of time.

Do people think that you can be sure about finding 'the one' after this amount of time?
Are these relationships as likely to work out than people who've been together longer before committing?

I'm hoping the answer is 'yes'.

Anyone any experiences of whirlwind romances?

dory · 22-02-2012 12:17AM

I'm sure it's possible to know whether you'll like someone long term after that amount of time. Marriage is always a gamble tbh. Doesn't matter if you do it after a year or ten.

starbelgrade · 22-02-2012 12:18AM

black francis wrote: »

I'm lucky that I met my wife when we were in our early 20's

I'm luckier. I met my missus when she was in her early 20s.

Fromthetrees · 22-02-2012 12:22AM

starbelgrade wrote: »

I'm luckier. I met my missus when she was in her early 20s.

Ha, I'm even luckier, I don't have a missus so I'm free to do whatever I want, like cry in the corner of my bedsit **** into a sock trying to remember what a pair of boobs look like...:(

kfallon · 22-02-2012 12:24AM

Thinly veiled "Look at me I have a missus" thread :pac:

Ricardo G · 22-02-2012 12:26AM

Yeah well i had 3 wives during the boom !, now i'm down to one

Kiera · 22-02-2012 12:26AM

I think it's kinda normal when people hit their 30's. I'm not one for rushing but i remember my last bf saying he asked me to be exclusive so soon because he was afraid i'd be snapped up by someone else. It's as if there's a race to settle down in your 30's if you're still single.

Chuck Stone · 22-02-2012 12:27AM

Insecurity and a fear of dying alone is a great motivator for the ol' 30+ quick marriage folks.

I've seen it.

Captain_Generic · 22-02-2012 12:29AM

A good friend of mine recently got engaged to someone he met after christmas. I've never met her but i'm going to the wedding because i was promised snacks

Kiera · 22-02-2012 12:30AM

Captain_Generic wrote: »

A good friend of mine recently got engaged to someone he met after christmas. I've never met her but i'm going to the wedding because i was promised snacks

2 months? :eek:

bfocusd · 22-02-2012 12:30AM

A mate of mine is in her early thirtys, she met her fella march 2011, since then they've got an place together, she's 6 months pregnant and they got married before xmas!

I think that's way too fast, the were engaged before she was pregnant too, it wasn't for the sake of being married before the birth.

The thing I question about it is the lad needs a green card thingy, he's already got a half Irish kid (2) and was due to be married, but it never happened. So we all are wondering what his deal really is, but shes happy so it's not down to us to question her choices

antodeco · 22-02-2012 12:32AM

I've been engaged 12 times the past 5 years. In fairness though, the girls didn't know they were engaged to me. I promised myself that if I ever met them, I'd tell him. Seemed only fair.

Ricardo G · 22-02-2012 12:32AM

bfocusd wrote: »

A mate of mine is in her early thirtys, she met her fella march 2011, since then they've got an place together, she's 6 months pregnant and they got married before xmas!

I think that's way too fast, the were engaged before she was pregnant too, it wasn't for the sake of being married before the birth.

The thing I question about it is the lad needs a green card thingy, he's already got a half Irish kid (2) and was due to be married, but it never happened. So we all are wondering what his deal really is, but shes happy so it's not down to us to question her choices

Sounds a bit "Deirdre Rashid" alright

CrackisWhack · 22-02-2012 12:34AM

black francis wrote: »

Now I'm lucky that I met my wife when we were in our early 20's, we went out for years before getting engaged/married/had kids.

I've noticed that as I've got older (mid 30's) that my single friends spend far less time before committing.

A friend of mine recently got engaged to a girl who he has been going out with for less than 6 months.

While I'm delighted for him, I can't help wondering if you can really know if you've found 'the one' after this amount of time.

Do people think that you can be sure about finding 'the one' after this amount of time?
Are these relationships as likely to work out than people who've been together longer before committing?

I'm hoping the answer is 'yes'.

Anyone any experiences of whirlwind romances?

Personally, I don't think you really know somebody after 6 months.

Frank Black · 22-02-2012 12:37AM

kfallon wrote: »

Thinly veiled "Look at me I have a missus" thread :pac:

Thinly veiled " thanks whore" post.:pac:

44leto · 22-02-2012 12:37AM

I have promised everlasting love on the first night, but then after the sex, I would become feint hearted and "a faint heart never won a fair lady".

bfocusd · 22-02-2012 12:39AM

Ricardo G wrote: »

Sounds a bit "Deirdre Rashid" alright

Yeah I know, she really rushed into it, I just hope for her sake it lasts and she wasn't played. She's always been the girl on the side before this, which I find hard to grasp, to go from having flings and no serious relationships to that in a year is extreme, she left everything behind for him.. Maybe he's a hypnotist?

stupidusername · 22-02-2012 12:39AM

eeek, who seriously believes in 'the one'?

as a rule I would say no, you can't know someone that well after a short time, but then it depends on how much time you spent together bla bla bla. plus it's all about feelings and other gay shit like that nowadays isn't it?

Ricardo G · 22-02-2012 12:39AM

44leto wrote: »

I have promised everlasting love on the first night, but then after the sex, I would become feint hearted and "a faint heart never won a fair lady".

Thats called going into "limp mode"

ChippingSodbury · 22-02-2012 12:41AM

I married Ms Right

I didn't know her first name was Always

But seriously, if you get on with someone over a 3 month period, there's no reason that you can't marry them (other than lots of reasons that have just come to mind while writing this sentence). This horse****e about "the one" and all that other crap that gets peddled in the glossy magazines really bugs me: if you want a relationship you need to work at it: there has to be compromises on both sides. Believe it or not, there isn't someone who has been put on this earth purely for the function of being your partner/ they will do everything to make you happy and you needn't do anything.

44leto · 22-02-2012 12:46AM

I know someone who is seeing someone for at least 10 years and they are still not engaged or living together. Their relationship always baffles me but I never ask.

Captain_Generic · 22-02-2012 12:48AM

Kiera wrote: »

2 months? :eek:

Yeah the guy was always a bit nuts, how he managed to involve someone else in his insanity is beyond me

Kiera · 22-02-2012 12:51AM

Captain_Generic wrote: »

Yeah the guy was always a bit nuts, how he managed to involve someone else in his insanity is beyond me

Things like that always make me think its gonna end in tears.

kfallon · 22-02-2012 12:54AM

Kiera wrote: »

Things like that always make me think its gonna end in tears.

Hankies at the ready

Christ it sounds like I'm giving a night class in **** :rolleyes:

No rush for me to settle down, no siree

Kiera · 22-02-2012 12:58AM

kfallon wrote: »

Hankies at the ready

Christ it sounds like I'm giving a night class in **** :rolleyes:

No rush for me to settle down, no siree

Like they're beating down your door??? :P

kfallon · 22-02-2012 01:03AM

Kiera wrote: »

Like they're beating down your door??? :P

For the **** class? They sure are, 3 month waiting list!

First come first served :pac:

oppenheimer1 · 22-02-2012 01:19AM

I houseshared with a chap whose parents were engaged within a week and married within the month after first meeting. They were married 30 years when I met them.

People rushing to settle down at 30+ can hardly be surprising. A womans clock is ticking louder at that age if they want a family. Its like the "quarter past two, you'll do" feeling. If the person isn't half objectionable they'll settle down with them. People are good at convincing themselves they've made the right decision.

holystungun9 · 22-02-2012 01:19AM

Should we do a Boards Back Up Plan lottery for all us 30+ singletons? Just in case, like.

Sauve · 22-02-2012 01:26AM

I drunkenly made a pact with a friend one night years and years ago that if we hit 30 and were both single then we'd marry each other.
I wonder what'd happen if I called him out on it now? :pac:

creditable · 22-02-2012 01:28AM

.

Kiera · 22-02-2012 01:29AM

creditable wrote: »

Funny how most women watch and thereby support porn but are adamantly against prostitution. :rolleyes:

Wrong thread?

Mr/Ms Right or Mr/Ms Right Now?

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