How many single mothers IYO fit the stereotypical single mothers image?

HovaBaby · 29-12-2011 02:03PM #1

I hear people making overgeneralizations like "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts", etc. That there are single mothers who are well off but might have gotten divorced or their husband died.

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

The King of Moo · 29-12-2011 02:08PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

I hear people making overgeneralizations like "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts", etc. That there are single mothers who are well off but might have gotten divorced or their husband died.

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

Bit of a loaded question, perhaps?

If "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts" is an "overgeneralization," is "All 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts" not one too?

Anyway, none of the single mothers I know fit any stereotype.
I think you'll find the boring truth is that every person is different and there's a wide variety of women who are single mothers.

Saila · 29-12-2011 02:09PM

about 3 fiddy

Nodin · 29-12-2011 02:09PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

I hear people making overgeneralizations like "Not all 16 year old mothers are 16 year old sluts", etc. That there are single mothers who are well off but might have gotten divorced or their husband died.

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

Whats your opinion?

44leto · 29-12-2011 02:13PM

The ones I know did not fit the above image, whether the above image is the general sterio typical image.

But there are some I see who do, the lady scumbags with their potential and present tearaways.

Cavehill Red · 29-12-2011 02:14PM

None.

But more than a few sadly fitted the other stereotypical image of single mums as vindictive bitter women who used their kids as weapons to get back at ex-partners.

Oranage2 · 29-12-2011 02:15PM

I'm from a council estate so I'd know of a few young girls that popped out a baby now live off social welfare. I'd know one or two to talk to and they're really nice people.

HovaBaby · 29-12-2011 02:31PM

Nodin wrote: »

Whats your opinion?

I know about 6 single mothers and 5 of them have a tendency to be promiscuous. This is from what I see though. One is 24 and has 3 children from 2 different men and she still somehow manages to sleep around often. One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

I knew a single mother from a course before, she was from a rough area and TBH I don't hold too much of a high opinion of her. She smokes about 40 fags a day and shouts and curses very often. One time outside the course center there was me, her and about 8 other students from the place. A fella walked down the road, shaved head and face full of scars and his body had many tattoos. The girl shouted out "Dat's the Father derre." Ya man didn't even look at her as he passed.

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

Khannie · 29-12-2011 02:33PM

I don't know many single mothers, but I married one. Apart from having a child, I'm struggling to think of any way she was significantly different from the non-mothers I went out with (except she is a legend and that's why I married her). She fit neatly into the "Got pregnant by accident and man responsible did a runner" category.

Khannie · 29-12-2011 02:35PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

You should report her if you think that's true tbh. I have read of similar neglect causing the death of a child.

ILikeBananas · 29-12-2011 02:36PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

But how many single mothers do you guys/gals reckon come from a disadvantanged background, have had a poor education and tended to sleep around a lot?

.

mikemac1 · 29-12-2011 02:41PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

You should report it
Edit, the other posters beat me to it but I'll add a little bit

Last year there was a case of a mother going for drinks and leaving the infant unattended.
It's not a buggy but it's a seat like a buggy, I don't know the word is.

She came back later, bringing the barman home for more drinks, picked up a man for herself

The infant was checked but she left it here, didn't put the infant to bed and later on it has slid down in the seat, the neck was bent at an angle and suffocated.

Later examinations showed skin in a poor state and nappies were not being changed regularly at all so while that wasn't a factor in the death there was neglect going on

Just make a report, nobody wants to read about another of these cases

pragmatic1 · 29-12-2011 02:42PM

The problem with any single mothers I know isnt the women themselves, its the grade A scum they had kids with. Mostly a result of being insecure and immature. Lost of social problems for this country down the road.

COYW · 29-12-2011 02:42PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

Having a child would leave her in a far stronger position in relation to getting house, without a shadow of a doubt. Her choice of housing and its location would also be far better.

From a council estate background myself and to be honest I have a very dim view of single mothers with multiple children. I know some people hate to hear this but it is a career option for plenty of girls in council estates. The percentage of girls who has children in their teens where I grew up was very high.

Batsy · 29-12-2011 02:47PM

Most single mothers in Britain only have a baby so that they can jump the housing queue and get about a dozen generous benefits.

I know there have been many people saying that, in order to reduce Britain's teenage pregnancy rate - which is the third highest in the world after the USA and New Zealand - all you have to to is stop providing single mothers with such benefits. Then, magically, less and less teenage girls will have babies.

Nodin · 29-12-2011 02:48PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

.............

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

Ye wha....?

Cavehill Red · 29-12-2011 02:49PM

Batsy wrote: »

Most single mothers in Britain only have a baby so that they can jump the housing queue and get about a dozen generous benefits.

You asked them all, I take it? Or is there some particular piece of research you're quoting that you can cite for us?

Latchy · 29-12-2011 02:55PM

Batsy wrote: »

Most single mothers in Britain only have a baby so that they can jump the housing queue and get about a dozen generous benefits.

Just as they are targeting other people ie , disability benefit claimants and as part of it's austerity measures, the British goverment plans to clamp down and reduce the amount of single mothers claiming for all sorts and not make it such an easy 'career' option but it would be totally unair to say most single mothers are just out for all they can get .

mattjack · 29-12-2011 02:55PM

HovaBaby wrote: »

I know about 6 single mothers and 5 of them have a tendency to be promiscuous. This is from what I see though. One is 24 and has 3 children from 2 different men and she still somehow manages to sleep around often. One of them appearently leaves her only child (one 6 month old baby) in the house and she goes out for a drink.

I knew a single mother from a course before, she was from a rough area and TBH I don't hold too much of a high opinion of her. She smokes about 40 fags a day and shouts and curses very often. One time outside the course center there was me, her and about 8 other students from the place. A fella walked down the road, shaved head and face full of scars and his body had many tattoos. The girl shouted out "Dat's the Father derre." Ya man didn't even look at her as he passed.

My sister goes into city hall sometimes because she is entitled to a house. She is encouraged by the people in city hall to have kids!! It would give her a much better chance at getting housing.

dont we all shout and curse.

Celly Smunt · 29-12-2011 02:58PM

The thing i don't get is why when a Teenage fella gets a girl pregnant he gets the shíte end of the blame,surely she opened her legs as quick as he stuck it in

The King of Moo · 29-12-2011 03:00PM

pmcmahon wrote: »

The thing i don't get is why when a Teenage fella gets a girl pregnant he gets the shíte end of the blame,surely she opened her legs as quick as he stuck it in

Going by After Hours at least, I think the mother gets a fair share of the blame!

Latchy · 29-12-2011 03:02PM

pmcmahon wrote: »

The thing i don't get is why when a Teenage fella gets a girl pregnant he gets the shíte end of the blame,surely she opened her legs as quick as he stuck it in

Condoms are pretty good at stopping unwanted pregnancys and if both partys are willing to take the risk without them then both should equally take the financial responsibiltys .

TheZohanS · 29-12-2011 03:05PM

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

skregs · 29-12-2011 03:07PM

TheZohan wrote: »

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

Deport her

jomc · 29-12-2011 03:07PM

I'd say of about 6 single mothers i know only one who makes it into the stereotype. She has two kids with two fathers but is still with the second one on and off. Drinks, smokes, has never had a job and tbh i think would never be capable of one. She just has this huge air of being unable to do anything. Luckily she gets a lot of help from family minding kids etc. She has a great house on rent allowance, bills paid, a car and doesn't seem to have any money troubles. But because of her inability to do much she wouldn't be out all the time but would constantly be drinking at home or having others over. When she doesn't have money for bills her family pick up the tab for her.

One single mother i know though completely defys the stereotype but is always being labelled as a slutty social welfare scrounger simply because she looks very young. She's late twenties and was engaged to the father when she found out he was cheating on her. The d!ck figured he could keep going because she wouldn't leave him as she was pregnant out of shame, she left anyway and built up her own life for herself, went to night college and moved in with her mother without ever receiving a penny from him. When she went to apply for housing and rent allowance she was told she isn't eligible because her daughter and her share a room in a house it was seen as fine

then her benefit was cut off after someone (the ex's current girlfriend who is a total nutter) reported her for owning a boat to sw. She doesn't smoke, hardly ever drinks or goes out and her kid is one of the happiest well mannered children i've ever met. Her kids father died and sw suspended her one parent payment again because of it until they could get a death cert, which took ages for her to get because he died abroad and was french/german i think.

I find it amazing that someone like that gets so many knocks and blocks in their way of trying to move on with their life but someone like the first case who literally had a baby straight after school and spent the rest of their life on their backside doing nothing but drinking, smoking and pawning kids off on other people gets everything handed to her.

Latchy · 29-12-2011 03:10PM

TheZohan wrote: »

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

Get her to tell you a few ' dumbe blonde walked into a bar ' jokes .

The King of Moo · 29-12-2011 03:17PM

TheZohan wrote: »

An overweight, Nigerian-Irish unemployed single mother from a poor background walks into a bar...

...and gets a beer for free from the state which she feeds to her baby which is in the pram she got for free from the council after she left her old one at the bus stop because it wouldn't fit on the bus.

She then takes the barman's job but is also still unemployed.

Batsy · 29-12-2011 03:23PM

Cavehill Red wrote: »

You asked them all, I take it? Or is there some particular piece of research you're quoting that you can cite for us?

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain. Again, as I said on another thread in relation to the banning of corporal punishment, giving single mothers automatic rights to housing and lavish benefits is another left wing policy which has been detrimental to our society, and our Tory government needs to sort it out.

Many organisations see it, too. The Family Education Trust says that Britain needs to adopt a model more like that in the Netherlands. It says that the British government should reduce the benefits that single mothers receive and also strengthen the family (i.e. make sure every child has a father, or a father-figure, in his or her life rather than just a mother). All this free housing and lavish benefits that British teenage and single mothers receive is nothing more than an incentive for them to get pregnant.

In the Netherlands, until recently, teenage mothers got NO welfare benefits at all. Now they receive them but they get a lot less than the over-generous amounts that British teenage mothers get. Unwed teenage parenthood is actually stigmatised in the Netherlands and is seen as wrong. Becoming a teenage mother is more likely to carry economic and social costs in the Netherlands than it is in Britain.

According to Robert Whelan, Director of the Family Education Trust:

Dr van Loon's research shows just how misconceived the Blair government's teenage pregnancy strategy really is. The government has committed itself to halving the teenage pregnancy rate by 2010, but seems to be pursuing policies which will have the opposite effect. Young people are encouraged to regard sexual relations from an early age as unobjectionable and desirable, as long as they use contraception. As teenagers are very inefficient users of birth control, this is a recipe for disaster. They need to be discouraged from engaging in high-risk behaviour, but the Teenage Pregnancy Unit will not take this on. Furthermore, the whole issue of the relationship between family structure and adolescent sexual activity is totally ignored by the TPU.

"We need to learn the lessons of the Netherlands. Benefits to teenage mothers should be reduced and made conditional on their living with their parents or in supervised hostel accommodation. Meanwhile, public policy should be urgently reviewed to see if there are ways in which the traditional family based on marriage can be shored up, rather than undermined as is the case at the moment.

http://www.famyouth.org.uk/press.php?pagename=DDUPR

It is now time to get rid of the left-wing policy of showering houses and benefits on teenage mothers and single mothers. All it is doing is creating an incentive for single, teenage girls to get pregnant. Remove those incentives and the rate of teenage pregnancy and the number of single mothers will go down. And that's what we need. Children should not be brought up with just a mother. Every child needs a father or, at least, a father figure in their lives. A huge percentage of those kids who end up in violent gangs and terrorising our streets come from single mother families and never had a father, or a father figure, in their lives.

Buceph · 29-12-2011 03:25PM

All of them: the godless hussies!

The King of Moo · 29-12-2011 03:30PM

Batsy wrote: »

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain. Again, as I said on another thread in relation to the banning of corporal punishment, giving single mothers automatic rights to housing and lavish benefits is another left wing policy which has been detrimental to our society, and our Tory government needs to sort it out.

Many organisations see it, too. The Family Education Trust says that Britain needs to adopt a model more like that in the Netherlands. It says that the British government should reduce the benefits that single mothers receive and also strengthen the family (i.e. make sure every child has a father, or a father-figure, in his or her life rather than just a mother). All this free housing and lavish benefits that British teenage and single mothers receive is nothing more than an incentive for them to get pregnant.

It is now time to get rid of the left-wing policy of showering houses and benefits on teenage mothers and single mothers. All it is doing is creating an incentive for single, teenage girls to get pregnant. Remove those incentives and the rate of teenage pregnancy and the number of single mothers will go down. And that's what we need. Children should not be brought up with just a mother. Every child needs a father or, at least, a father figure in their lives. A huge percentage of those kids who end up in violent gangs and terrorising our streets come from single mother families and never had a father, or a father figure, in their lives.

Like Michael Phelps and Lance Armstrong.

Wasters.

And that Barack Obama fellow.

Never amounted to anything.

Cavehill Red · 29-12-2011 03:30PM

Batsy wrote: »

It's obvious to anybody who has half-a-brain.

Then show us lesser mortals the statistics you're citing.

Oh, and by the way, that Robert Whelan chap is a spoofer who doesn't have the doctorate he claims, and his organisation and he are a self-appointed religious thinktank which opposes sex education in schools.

How many single mothers IYO fit the stereotypical single mothers image?

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