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Video Games Journalist.

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    #2
    chin_grin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,808 ✭✭✭✭chin_grin


    You're not really showing off your journalism skills by giving a few lines about the game and then linking to another site (like GameSpot) or just chucking up a video.

    http://keithcashin.wordpress.com/2011/10/17/the-descent/

    Also it's "being" not "been". You repeat this error a few times. (Paragraph 4, it's used in it's right context in paragraph 5).
    Even with all this noises and screaming it still seems more like I belong here

    "the" instead of "this" I think.

    I didn't finish it.........Well.........no.......I did read on.

    Protip. Never repeat a word (Eg "shriek" is used twice to describe the sound. You could have used "cry" as one).

    Who the hell needs a doctors note for missing one day? B*stards! :pac:

    Try to get out of the habit of using "I". Describe what's happening without constantly referring to the self or the character. It's quite repetitive.

    Where did he get the gun and more ammo to shoot everyone? And then remember what he was doing the second time (in the hospital) and conveniently blank out when he did that in work?

    It's a good story. Just needs a little tinkering.


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    #3
    KeithCashin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14 ✭KeithCashin


    Thanks for pointing that out. I'll change it.

    Also I can't get my hands on a lot of codes to preview games but when I do I write more

    http://thegamingliberty.com/index.php/2011/11/18/review-fusion-genesis/


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    #4
    chin_grin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,808 ✭✭✭✭chin_grin


    KeithCashin wrote: »
    Thanks for pointing that out. I'll change it.

    Also I can't get my hands on a lot of codes to preview games but when I do I write more

    http://thegamingliberty.com/index.php/2011/11/18/review-fusion-genesis/

    Sorry, but please proof read. Unless it was a typo made on the site. :pac:
    they are like boy guards that follow your around.

    I think this needs to be rephrased.....
    His humour got me to want to stay playing the game when the value had quickly drained.

    Good review. Thought that the factions didn't need a mention as you don't really go in to them in detail other than name.

    Also, saying "obligatory" multiplayer mode conveys it as being a tad tedious and it not deserving any recognition.


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    #5
    KeithCashin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14 ✭KeithCashin


    I can't change that, the editor would need to do that. I sent it to him and he put it up.

    As for the factions, I originally had them in, in detail but took it out.

    In hindsight that was a bad choice on my behalf.


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    #6
    chin_grin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,808 ✭✭✭✭chin_grin


    KeithCashin wrote: »
    I can't change that, the editor would need to do that. I sent it to him and he put it up.

    As for the factions, I originally had them in, in detail but took it out.

    In hindsight that was a bad choice on my behalf.

    Ah it's ok. Just if you were posting for a bigger review\gaming group they'd probably string you up by the bawls for the slightest mistake. But TGL is a great site. Keep plugging away for them.

    Also keep reading. Read until your eyes bleed, wipe them and read some more. Read every review you can and even for games you have no interest in. :pac:

    Pick up a few GamesTM's too. My favourite (and best......in my opinion) games review magazine going. There might be a few jobs listings at the back of that if you wanted to go for them.


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    #7
    super_furry
    Registered Users Posts: 27,321 ✭✭✭✭super_furry


    Also be prepared to work for free/peanuts. It's a job that everyone wants and so, pay feck all.


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    #8
    KeithCashin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14 ✭KeithCashin


    Thanks Chin, all the advise helps =] I read everything haha. It's shifted so I'm reading more than I'm playing at the moment.

    Also Super I do a lot of free work, you're right everyone does want the job so that's why I'm doing it =]


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    #9
    johnny_ultimate
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Arts Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 29,094 CMod ✭✭✭✭johnny_ultimate


    You need to work on defining what separates you from the thousands of other game writers out there. Reading the news stories on your blog there, they read like press releases, and could find the same info on countless other sites. Inject stories with personality - whether it be humour, honest opinion or (best of the best) in-depth, intelligent criticism. I see you're willing to criticise The Old Republic in a preview - that's good. Craft writing that's distinctly you're own. Don't just regurgitate news stories or what the publisher / developer feeds you - anyone can do that, and while it may be the unfortunate trend in games journalism as a whole, you need to have a unique selling point if you want people to read your material over others :) Of course, you might have to put up with the noisy idiots who populate the Internet and instantly dismiss anyone whose opinion - heaven forbid! - differs from consensus. Ignore them.


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    #10
    KeithCashin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14 ✭KeithCashin


    Cheers Johnny, I try to do a lot of Indie Developers and what they are doing. I'm still waiting on interviews back for some Developers but that's going to be my hook.
    I take what people say about my work series because I'm always looking to improve it =]


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