It's my car

The last year the Fleah Ceoil was held in Clonmel myself, the then gf & a mate headed down for the final weekend. I drive a VW T4 campervan which I parked up in a carpark in the middle of the town.
The mate parked his Polo two spaces away from mine. Anyroad we all hit the town and enjoyed the night in grand style.
Returning back we find the space between our vechicles was empty and as it was a lovely night out comes the deckchairs and we kick back well into the morning.

I'm awoken about 11am feeling the worse for wear and listening to the revellers, hawkers & music floating by.
Shortly afterwards a car pulls into our "patio" space and the two occupants get out.
Now, at the time the camper was a stealt camper ie. no windows, so the two lads were unawares that there was anyone in my van.

Ding! goes the drivers door against my camper.
I hear the car's passanger say to the driver to watch the campervan to which the driver says F*ck It, it's not my van! Then bangs his door against my van good and heavy DING DING DING DING!!!
They cleared off unable to hear my muffled shouts and unaware of my presence 'cause the gf basically restrainted me which, given my condition, was not hard to do.

The car was a nearly new Yaris and was probably either a first car or else the Mammy's car. Regardless, soon as the gf was scarce I got my Leatherman and walking 'round the car twice keyed it as I went.
I'd never done anything like that before nor since but being so hungover and the sheer obnoxiousness of the little turd that purposly & needlessly damaged my van I just could'nt help myself.
Not ashamed to admit I did get great satisfaction in doing so. General rule though is ya don't f*ck with another's motor.

However I have gone all Charlie Bronson a few of times since.
I'd usually have a valve key in the glove box; once I removed all valves from the tyres leaving them securely under the wiper as a subtle F*ck You!

I'd usually have fruit with me when on a long drive and twice I've plugged dickhead's exhaust pipes. Very enjoyable being able to move away a short distance and watch the scene unfold.
But as said before there are plenty of dickheads out there and they're just not worth getting stressed out over.