Is the institution of marriage unnatural?

Everyone to their own as they say.....

I just have a question:

Is a civil partnership not the same as a registry office wedding? I thought it was. Could be wrong though.

Unfortunately as said before some couples do have a "quickie" registry office ceremony just for financial reasons, especially if one is to stay at home as primary caregiver to the children, there's tax benefits there.

Modern and all as we are unfortunately there are still certain things that are only covered by a marriage certificate:
A relative of mine was killed in a tragic accident. He had been in a relationship with his partner for 13 years but they had never married, they had no children yet either. Had been together since their teens. They were in Ireland but away for the weekend when it happened. Unfortunately as they were not married she was not recognised as a next of kin. She was not allowed to see him until a family member had formally identified him which was about 4/5 hours after death. She sat in a hospital corridor all the time, not even taken to a relatives room, she wasn't even allowed in the ambulance with him.

While this is definitely an extreme case it does, I think, show that Ireland, modern and all as we think we are, still rely on that piece of paper when push comes to shove.

sensibleken wrote: »

hmm. just reading one of the reviews there it seems to be based on a much held but completely bogus claim that pre christian ireland was matriarchal and post christian was not. Ive reda a few works based on that premise and they tend to be a-historical in the extreme.

a very good, scholarly and very well backed up book on the same subject of women in ancient ireland is 'Land of Women' by Lisa M Bitel.

I think some of the reviews are really disagreeing with the perspective, but then again history isn't my forte. She footnotes most of the info, so I don't know why some of the reviews say the history is wrong.

Cheers for the "Land of Women" recommendation. Will check it out. :-)

Kasabian wrote: »

Poor fella :pac::)

Ha! Sad thing is he was into marriage when we started going out and I changed his mind. Oops.

And given how many women I've known who turned into Rent-a-wagon when they're planning a wedding, I'm doing him a favour. :pac:

Deleted User wrote: »

I would not call it natural or unnatural really any more than anything else we as humans do. Cooking food, using electricity or spending money are all not exactly natural either.

Marriage to me though simply is not appealing. I might be somewhat biased given marriage to me is not an option given I am in a truple rather than a couple - it is myself and two girls - but I can honestly say I do not feel like I am losing out of being denied anything by being precluded the option.

Anything we think we require from marriage we have found other ways to obtain. Anything we have not yet gotten are all things we feel we can do without anyway.

No way. Regular 3 somes.

Legend

Young fellas these days wouldn't be as tough as my generation.
When things get rough or rocky nowadays they're gone! out the door, off to see a therapist or a counsellor. They don't have the stomach for a long lasting relationship unfortunately.

sensibleken wrote: »

history is my main interest but i have a big interest in feminist literature too. Its just whenever something is told from a perspective, historically, it is too easily drifted into an agenda which is biased. I couldnt imagine an arguement saying that the introduction of christianity into ireland damaged womens rights (at least in the first few centuries).

Lisa M Bitel talks extensively about marriage and child raring in ireland which bared more resemblance to the communist manifesto than roman catholic ideals. every page is a revelation athough its quite academic and difficult to read in bits.

Sounds really interesting. I'll definitely check it out. The Serpent and the Goddess deals with pre-Christian Ireland too so it'd be interesting to compare and contrast.

If you ever get a chance to read it, let me know. I'd love to hear your perspective on its accuracy.

Millicent wrote: »

What's wrong with working through your problems with a counsellor?

Nothing at all wrong with the couple going to a counsellor. I meant that the bloke(usually) nowadays can't handle pressure like my generation did. Any hassle and he's off.

orourkeda wrote: »

A legally binding contract wont make raising a child any easier. Besides it sint necessary

..

For some strange reason it does actually make it easier... defies logic