God Botherers

u_c_thesecond · 17-10-2011 05:13PM #1

Just back from the shop to find 2 God Botherers at my door bugging my fella (whos an athiest ) about god . He had told them "im an athiest" and they still wouldnt leave him alone. After i arrived they started on about if we had children they would be condemed to hell etc .

They got a swift "**** off" and a door slam after that comment!

Just looked out the window and saw them being chased out a gate by another man across the road - - guess they are condeming everyones kids to hell:P

NothingMan · 17-10-2011 05:16PM

If it was only their god they bothered it'd be grand. I'd prefer chuggers over the bible bashing weirdos any day.

Badly Drunk Boy · 17-10-2011 05:16PM

What flavour of God Botherer were they?

geetar · 17-10-2011 05:16PM

cool story, my brother.

mikemac · 17-10-2011 05:17PM

Living in sin? :eek:

Fart · 17-10-2011 05:17PM

You should have said: "God, stop bothering me!".

seamus · 17-10-2011 05:17PM

I find that, "I'm not interested in having this conversation" works perfectly fine without getting all hot and bothered.

Two witnesses responded very nicely to that statement one day and wished me a good day as they left.

OutlawPete · 17-10-2011 05:18PM

I just answer the door and tell them to hang on for two minutes ..

Then turn the following up full blast.

They usually shag off after a couple of minutes or so then.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M75qK-hxPqs

NothingMan · 17-10-2011 05:18PM

Badly Drunk Boy wrote: »

What flavour of God Botherer were they?

Strawberry. Although I wouldn't recommend licking them, strange after taste.

AnamGlas · 17-10-2011 05:18PM

seamus wrote: »

I find that, "I'm not interested in having this conversation" works perfectly fine without getting all hot and bothered.

Two witnesses responded very nicely to that statement one day and wished me a good day as they left.

Cursing you all the way from the door

maximoose · 17-10-2011 05:19PM

You obviously haven't heard the good news...

Seachmall · 17-10-2011 05:19PM

"Do you believe God offers tests for his followers to pass?"

"Yes, of course"

"Give me your wallet"

"Excuse me?"

"'Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do
not demand it back.' - Luke 6:30"

"I don't think that's what is meant"

"Either prove your faithfulness or stop trying to convince me of something you yourself are not convinced of"

Chuck Stone · 17-10-2011 05:20PM

Invite them in to slaughter a goat for the dark lord.

Captain Darling · 17-10-2011 05:21PM

I really hate god botherers trying to ram things down my throat.

spoofilyj · 17-10-2011 05:22PM

Had a pair of them call to the folks house a couple of weeks ago, I home for the weekend and was out cutting the lawn on a saturday morning, hungover to feck, they drove up the lane parked and then approched me, the first guy started by saying, I dont have much time to talk but would you have a second to talk about (opens a marked page in what I guess was a bible) I just replied, Absolutely No Interest, good bye.
You man tried to continue the conversation I told him it was none of his business what I believe and cut the conversation off again by sayin Good bye, he tried again and then was told to F*ck Off, they just dont leave when you try to be polite.:mad:

They are almost as bad as the fu*ckers that call from Concern trying to get you to sign up to a direct debit and dont leave you get a word in edgeways till they have finished their speel.

foxyboxer · 17-10-2011 05:23PM

....and the Lord God, the divine Christ, dying on the cross, decreed "You're all made of atoms, the earth revolves around the sun and a man who is 29 shall be considered a child"

* * * * *

Your children will go to hell? Religious trolls trying to provoke a debate.

stovelid · 17-10-2011 05:24PM

I hate god botherers almost as much as the constant deluge of smart arse student debating society fish barrel shooting about theists around here these days.

Benny_Cake · 17-10-2011 05:26PM

Don't think I've ever had JW's or Mormons calling to my house. Concern and Airtricity on the other hand...

ZombieBride · 17-10-2011 05:27PM

I am convinced that I was put on the Mormon black list, they came to my house with their little book and asked me to read the highlighted portions.
Bless them, they failed to realise that my father made sure none of his children were baptised but that we read all the major religions books so we could decided for ourselves what religion we wanted (he ended up with a Jehovah witness, a born-again Christian, a Roman Catholic, and some Atheists).
So in the week they gave me to read their book, I cross referenced it with my own bible and had a few foolscap pages of notes and questions for their return. They weren't pleased, and never returned, though I did see them in the neighbourhood afterwards (always on the otherside of the road)

Einhard · 17-10-2011 05:29PM

Seachmall wrote: »

"Do you believe God offers tests for his followers to pass?"

"Yes, of course"

"Give me your wallet"

"Excuse me?"

"'Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do
not demand it back.' - Luke 6:30"

"I don't think that's what is meant"

"Either prove your faithfulness or stop trying to convince me of something you yourself are not convinced of"

I'm gonna memorise this!

I had a God Botherer try to convert me in Melbourne once. I was in an argumentative mood and gave as good as I got. After about 20 minutes the poor fella was trying to get rid of me!:D

ItsNoAlias · 17-10-2011 05:30PM

ZombieBride wrote: »

I am convinced that I was put on the Mormon black list, they came to my house with their little book and asked me to read the highlighted portions.
Bless them, they failed to realise that my father made sure none of his children were baptised but that we read all the major religions books so we could decided for ourselves what religion we wanted (he ended up with a Jehovah witness, a born-again Christian, a Roman Catholic, and some Atheists).
So in the week they gave me to read their book, I cross referenced it with my own bible and had a few foolscap pages of notes and questions for their return. They weren't pleased, and never returned, though I did see them in the neighbourhood afterwards (always on the otherside of the road)

Did you tell them your Father had made you read all the books of major religion? If not than it is not a case of them failing to realise.

stephen_k · 17-10-2011 05:35PM

I'm living in the sticks, about 2 miles from nearest town and had two JW's call to the house the other day.... They were walking, I was impressed by the dedication to get out there and spread the word, so much so that I was tempted to give them some of my time and hear them out
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I didn't, I told them to F*ck Off

17-10-2011 05:36PM

it's your door, why do you engage, just say no thanks and close the door
it's like people having a freak out and coming up with elaborate schemes to avoid chuggers

Buceph · 17-10-2011 05:41PM

Ask them for their religion's most famous rock star followers. That you're cross-referencing the best rock stars with religion and deciding your faith on that.

So far for me Zoroastrianism is winning out with Freddie Mercury, and a pretty cool concept of chaos and order.

AnonoBoy · 17-10-2011 05:43PM

Captain Darling wrote: »

I really hate god botherers trying to ram things down my throat.

Stop hanging around in public toilets then.

ZombieBride · 17-10-2011 05:44PM

ItsNoAlias wrote: »

Did you tell them your Father had made you read all the books of major religion? If not than it is not a case of them failing to realise.

I can't be positive, it was a number of years ago now, but probably. I did find out that one of their fathers was the creature from the black lagoon.

Badly Drunk Boy · 17-10-2011 05:45PM

Any dealings I've had with Jehovah's Witnesses calling to my door have been very civilised and polite (on both sides) and very brief.

"We have some literature here showing how great God is. Would you be interested in reading it?"

"Yeah, okay."

*They hand me a pamphlet*

"Bye!"

"Yeah, bye..."

That's all it has ever taken for me to get rid of them, and the whole conversation have never been more than a minute long. They're happy that I took their propaganda and I'm happy that they're gone, and there was no nastiness.

Agricola · 17-10-2011 05:47PM

Yeah you just have to suppress the natural inclination to be polite by listening to them for more than 10 seconds. You just have to be blunt as a spoon, no need to be nasty, but be blunt.

Badly Drunk Boy wrote: »

Any dealings I've had with Jehovah's Witnesses calling to my door have been very civilised and polite (on both sides) and very brief.

"We have some literature here showing how great God is. Would you be interested in reading it?"

"Yeah, okay."

*They hand me a pamphlet*

"Bye!"

"Yeah, bye..."

That's all it has ever taken for me to get rid of them, and the whole conversation have never been more than a minute long. They're happy that I took their propaganda and I'm happy that they're gone, and there was no nastiness.

I found that that doesnt work. I answered the door to them when I was 17 or 18 and took some pamplets off them just to get shut of them. As soon as I shut the door, I binned it. Following week they came back and wanted to see what I thought of it!
I had to set Mammy on them in the end. That did the trick!

TheZohanS · 17-10-2011 05:49PM

Let people believe in what they want to believe in, I can respect people's beliefs and non beliefs equally as long as they respect the law of the land.

BopNiblets · 17-10-2011 05:54PM

NothingMan wrote: »

Badly Drunk Boy wrote: »

What flavour of God Botherer were they?

Strawberry. Although I wouldn't recommend licking them, strange after taste.

To get their true flavour you have to grind them up, it's the only way to get their juices out!

Irish Guitarist · 17-10-2011 06:01PM

He hardly thought saying "I'm an atheist" was going to make them leave did he?

God Botherers

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