How to enhance your chances of getting a job

whiteboy · 2011-02-18 18:35:51

So there's a job opening up in a supermarket near where I live and I wanna get it, it's not the worst thing ever if I don't but I'm still gonna try. Thing is I worked there four years ago so I think this will give me a better chance than others but it of course comes down to your past expertises, qualifications and…

18-02-2011 07:35PM

#1

whiteboy

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So there's a job opening up in a supermarket near where I live and I wanna get it, it's not the worst thing ever if I don't but I'm still gonna try.

Thing is I worked there four years ago so I think this will give me a better chance than others but it of course comes down to your past expertises, qualifications and achievements, I've already put in a cv and I'm thinking of dropping another one in tonight.

Anybody have any helpful tips, I want this job!

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#2 18-02-2011 07:36PM

Heisenberg89

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Get a big pair of fake tits.

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#3 18-02-2011 07:37PM

Eric Cartman

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dont rape anybody who works there, - it will help

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#4 18-02-2011 07:38PM

phasers

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Where is it?

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#5 18-02-2011 07:38PM

Oranage2

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i usually make up a fake company that does the same type of work - so say you worked in a small shop and just give a family member as a reference but pretend they were a manager or something -

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#6 18-02-2011 07:39PM

Sticky_Fingers

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Thing is I worked there four years ago so I think this will give me a better chance than others but it of course comes down to your past expertises, qualifications and achievements, I've already put in a cv and I'm thinking of dropping another one in tonight.

Anybody have any helpful tips, I want this job!

I'm assuming it's some kind of management role because the only past expertises, qualifications and achievements you need to stack shelves is two functional arms and a pulse.

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#7 18-02-2011 07:42PM

whiteboy

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Sticky_Fingers wrote: »

I'm assuming it's some kind of management role because the only past expertises, qualifications and achievements you need to stack shelves is two functional arms and a pulse.

Exactly, so how does one make themselves stand out in a positive light?
I'm thinking I'll drop in every few days to show them I'm adamant.

oh PS it's not a managerial role it is as you said, stacking shelves and everything else.

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#8 18-02-2011 07:44PM

KeithM89_old

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Magic Tricks. Interviewers love magic tricks.

Or just fuck them...

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#9 18-02-2011 07:45PM

RichieC

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I'd avoid being racist, no one likes a racist.

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#10 18-02-2011 07:46PM

Saviola

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Don't blast them with piss.

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#11 18-02-2011 07:46PM

Eric Cartman

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RichieC wrote: »

I'd avoid being racist, no one likes a racist.

Your advice would suck if he was going to work at KKK-Mart

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#12 18-02-2011 07:50PM

Chris P. Bacon

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whiteboy wrote: »

So there's a job opening up in a supermarket near where I live and I wanna get it, it's not the worst thing ever if I don't but I'm still gonna try.

Thing is I worked there four years ago so I think this will give me a better chance than others but it of course comes down to your past expertises, qualifications and achievements, I've already put in a cv and I'm thinking of dropping another one in tonight.

Anybody have any helpful tips, I want this job!

Why are you handing in two CV's?

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#13 18-02-2011 07:50PM

Sticky_Fingers

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whiteboy wrote: »

Exactly, so how does one make themselves stand out in a positive light?
I'm thinking I'll drop in every few days to show them I'm adamant.

oh PS it's not a managerial role it is as you said, stacking shelves and everything else.

Are any of your old managers still around and would they remember you? Perhaps let them know that you are going for the job and that since you've previously worked in the store you know the deal, less training required, know how everything works, etc etc. I'd lay off badgering them though, your only liable to piss them off with constant inquires, though do try and be friendly with the HR person dealing with the placement and let them know if anything else comes up that you'd be very interested. That way if you don't get the job this time around they may remember you when the next vacancy comes up.

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#14 18-02-2011 07:53PM

PandyAndy

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Are you reapplying for Spar, Fergus?

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056183803

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#15 18-02-2011 08:00PM

whiteboy

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Richie Cranium wrote: »

Why are you handing in two CV's?

Just so it gives me an edge and allows them to see I'm a bit desperate:pac:

Sticky_Fingers wrote: »

Are any of your old managers still around and would they remember you? Perhaps let them know that you are going for the job and that since you've previously worked in the store you know the deal, less training required, know how everything works, etc etc. I'd lay off badgering them though, your only liable to piss them off with constant inquires, though do try and be friendly with the HR person dealing with the placement and let them know if anything else comes up that you'd be very interested. That way if you don't get the job this time around they may remember you when the next vacancy comes up.

There are a couple of them about, mainly the senior managers and I have thought about using this to my advantage, I've only been in once but they weren't around at the time.

PandyAndy wrote: »

Are you reapplying for Spar, Fergus?

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056183803

lol this is pretty ironic

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#16 18-02-2011 08:12PM

grrrrrrrrrr

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I worked in an office in a supermarket during the summer and the manager said they used get cvs everyday and he wasnt going through. Go in and try talk to the owner or manager. Put in your cover letter that you know the store already so wont be Washington looking for things. Tell them your very motivated and would be delighted to work for them.

Good luck

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#17 18-02-2011 08:51PM

phasers

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grrrrrrrrrr wrote: »

I worked in an office in a supermarket during the summer and the manager said they used get cvs everyday and he wasnt going through. Go in and try talk to the owner or manager. Put in your cover letter that you know the store already so wont be Washington looking for things.

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#18 18-02-2011 08:53PM

longhalloween

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Sticky_Fingers wrote: »

I'm assuming it's some kind of management role because the only past expertises, qualifications and achievements you need to stack shelves is two functional arms and a pulse.

Since when do you need two arms??

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#19 18-02-2011 09:02PM

Sticky_Fingers

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longhalloween wrote: »

Since when do you need two arms??

Well I suppose you don't but I think if you were unfortunate enough to be appendagely challenged it would be quite difficult stacking tins of Whispers or mopping up baby sick using only your stumps.

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#20 18-02-2011 09:52PM

ICE HOUSE

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Write a hard luck story letter to the manager

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#21 18-02-2011 10:04PM

stovelid

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Offer to pay them for employing you.

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#22 18-02-2011 11:04PM

Khyra24

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Do what you did last time. You got the job before, if you act the same, you'll get it again, yah?!

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#23 18-02-2011 11:07PM

SamSamSammy

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Swing out your lad and flop it on the table. They'll be auto-impressed.

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#24 19-02-2011 01:10AM

squeakyduck

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Be smiley and confident but not in a cocky way.

Do a bit of reading on the store if you can, has anything new been implemented since you left, knowing a little bit about the company will be different from your competition.

Make out a few questions that you might like to be asked, and a few few that might make you think just to cover yourself, you don't want to sit there like an eejit thinking of an answer.

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#25 19-02-2011 02:07AM

Faith+1

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Eric Cartman wrote: »

dont rape anybody who works there, - it will help

Not cool.:(

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#26 19-02-2011 07:03AM

vampire of kilmainham

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i hate work i love to stay in bed all day and mope about i was company sgt in the army for 25yrs so i have a military pension so dont have to work anyway :D:D:D:D:D

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#27 19-02-2011 07:34AM

Pdfile

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whiteboy wrote: »

So there's a job opening up in a supermarket near where I live and I wanna get it, it's not the worst thing ever if I don't but I'm still gonna try.

Thing is I worked there four years ago so I think this will give me a better chance than others but it of course comes down to your past expertises, qualifications and achievements, I've already put in a cv and I'm thinking of dropping another one in tonight.

Anybody have any helpful tips, I want this job!

be a black boy... or green... pink yellow or blue... :cool:

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#28 19-02-2011 02:48PM

WopTittyPop

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vampire of kilmainham wrote: »

i hate work i love to stay in bed all day and mope about i was company sgt in the army for 25yrs so i have a military pension so dont have to work anyway :D:D:D:D:D

I envy your 100% guaranteed lifetime-satisfaction and sense of complete self-accomplishment. Also, you are amazing at giving advice on how to enhance your chances of getting a job. Teach me your ways, oh wise one.

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#29 19-02-2011 03:05PM

Sticky_Fingers

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vampire of kilmainham wrote: »

i hate work i love to stay in bed all day and mope about i was company sgt in the army for 25yrs so i have a military pension so dont have to work anyway :D:D:D:D:D

Oh I won't be so contented with yourself there Sarge, the way things are going the government will more than likely be looking to take a big old chunk out of your pension some time in the near future.

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#30 19-02-2011 06:47PM

Faith+1

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vampire of kilmainham wrote: »

i hate work i love to stay in bed all day and mope about i was company sgt in the army for 25yrs so i have a military pension so dont have to work anyway :D:D:D:D:D

They obviously don't teach sgt's how to use capital letters, apostrophe's or full stops.

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#31 19-02-2011 06:53PM

baldymac

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speak polish and your sorted

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