How the hell do I decide this one?!

Cullen82 · 11-01-2011 02:39PM #1

Alright alright alright, Long time since I last posted ! Good to be back:D

I have a right head melting situation so looking for words of wisdom/advice whatever, I'm over in Africa working as a Tour Leader for an Overland Company....So I start the job in mid October, I've come to the end of my first trip and fly back to Nairobi to start my next one tomorrow and work my way down over 3 months to Cape Town again...Happy days eh? Well it would be only for the fact that I met someone on the trip who I tried not to become attached to..... but did....and so did she. We said goodbye to each other this morning and shes on her way back home in a few days......to CANADA....I've never met someone so made for me in my entire life...shes fecking A - mazing. I'm 28 by the way.

She wants me to go visit her in Canada after my next trip (circa April) which I most certainly want to do, In fact I'm more excited about seeing her again than seeing this unbelievably amazing continent again.....It's easily possible for me to do it during my next break between trips but if I decide to go, For me, it means Im serious about this girl being "the one" which will in turn will mean I'll end up leaving this "dream job" for whats obviously going to be a risk (the relationship) whatever way I look at it.

Any thoughts? The job is basically gone if I want any sort of future with her...I've already begun thinking of WH Visa for Canada.

Thanks After Hours,

Cullen82

AckwelFoley · 11-01-2011 02:40PM

You're asking AH for advice about a girl?

LOL.

pickarooney · 11-01-2011 02:42PM

Don't decide anything until after your next trip, but by all means keep in contact with her. If you still feel as strongly about one another after that then you'll soon come to understand what means most to you.

jester77 · 11-01-2011 02:43PM

snyper wrote: »

You're asking AH for advice about a girl?

LOL.

That's not very helpful

Why not have her visit, in the mean time - skype, lots of lube and a man sized box of tissues.

jackiebaron · 11-01-2011 02:43PM

Kill her. Problem solved.

tommy21 · 11-01-2011 02:44PM

Cullen82 wrote: »

Alright alright alright, Long time since I last posted ! Good to be back:D

I have a right head melting situation so looking for words of wisdom/advice whatever, I'm over in Africa working as a Tour Leader for an Overland Company....So I start the job in mid October, I've come to the end of my first trip and fly back to Nairobi to start my next one tomorrow and work my way down over 3 months to Cape Town again...Happy days eh? Well it would be only for the fact that I met someone on the trip who I tried not to become attached to..... but did....and so did she. We said goodbye to each other this morning and shes on her way back home in a few days......to CANADA....I've never met someone so made for me in my entire life...shes fecking A - mazing. I'm 28 by the way.

She wants me to go visit her in Canada after my next trip (circa April) which I most certainly want to do, In fact I'm more excited about seeing her again than seeing this unbelievably amazing continent again.....It's easily possible for me to do it during my next break between trips but if I decide to go, For me, it means Im serious about this girl being "the one" which will in turn will mean I'll end up leaving this "dream job" for whats obviously going to be a risk (the relationship) whatever way I look at it.

Any thoughts? The job is basically gone if I want any sort of future with her...I've already begun thinking of WH Visa for Canada.

Thanks After Hours,

Cullen82

Can't she come visit you? Hard to get and all that .

tommy21 · 11-01-2011 02:45PM

You are young (ish) grasshopper, but you will learn (eh).

AckwelFoley · 11-01-2011 02:46PM

tommy21 wrote: »

Can't she come visit you? Hard to get and all that .

My thoughts exactly

Cuddlesworth · 11-01-2011 02:46PM

FFS man your in Africa, stick your penis into something else. Like a Baboon or Zebra.

ro_chez · 11-01-2011 02:47PM

Cullen82 wrote: »

Alright alright alright, Long time since I last posted ! Good to be back:D

I have a right head melting situation so looking for words of wisdom/advice whatever, I'm over in Africa working as a Tour Leader for an Overland Company....So I start the job in mid October, I've come to the end of my first trip and fly back to Nairobi to start my next one tomorrow and work my way down over 3 months to Cape Town again...Happy days eh? Well it would be only for the fact that I met someone on the trip who I tried not to become attached to..... but did....and so did she. We said goodbye to each other this morning and shes on her way back home in a few days......to CANADA....I've never met someone so made for me in my entire life...shes fecking A - mazing. I'm 28 by the way.

She wants me to go visit her in Canada after my next trip (circa April) which I most certainly want to do, In fact I'm more excited about seeing her again than seeing this unbelievably amazing continent again.....It's easily possible for me to do it during my next break between trips but if I decide to go, For me, it means Im serious about this girl being "the one" which will in turn will mean I'll end up leaving this "dream job" for whats obviously going to be a risk (the relationship) whatever way I look at it.

Any thoughts? The job is basically gone if I want any sort of future with her...I've already begun thinking of WH Visa for Canada.

Thanks After Hours,

Cullen82

Has she got big tits and gives good head?

scientific1982 · 11-01-2011 02:47PM

Go for the girl OP. If you dont you might regret it for the rest of your life.

Cullen82 · 11-01-2011 02:49PM

Nah mate, She wont be coming back here any time soon. The idea was that if things were working out I could work over there and see how it went...We've spent the past 3 Months in each others pockets so another holiday won't decide anything!

And YEAH damn right I'm asking AH for advice on a girl!

Funny you mention I should kill her, I literally saved her life last month - Maybe I shouldnt have and Id have opne less decision to make eh!

Coriolanus · 11-01-2011 02:51PM

First build a dungeon underneath your mud hut in Darkest Africa.
Then go to Canada as planned but before leaving, drug her and mail her to yourself in Africa.
You should get there before her whereupon you can stick her in the dungeon and keep her as a sex slave.
Oh, make a detour to Ireland on the way home. Boots are selling the MAP over the counter now so grab a few.

AckwelFoley · 11-01-2011 02:53PM

Cullen82 wrote: »

Nah mate, She wont be coming back here any time soon. The idea was that if things were working out I could work over there and see how it went...We've spent the past 3 Months in each others pockets so another holiday won't decide anything!

And YEAH damn right I'm asking AH for advice on a girl!

Funny you mention I should kill her, I literally saved her life last month - Maybe I shouldnt have and Id have opne less decision to make eh!

Dude-

3 months?? The first year of a relationship is called the honeymoon period. Its all love and oral... But i wouldnt advise you making life decisions based on 3 months with a woman.

A woman is like an onion and all that.. you havent even peeled off the first layer..

Scarydoll · 11-01-2011 02:56PM

Visit her in April and see how things go from there. Don't go and leave your job just yet.

Badgermonkey · 11-01-2011 02:56PM

What sort of career progression does your current position offer?

The answer to that question may determine your next move but to be honest fcuk the job, go after her.

Pherekydes · 11-01-2011 02:58PM

Jeez, how difficult is this?

Get a season ticket on the Churchill to Timbuktoo* DC3. See your gal once a year. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

*Churchill and Timbuktoo are probably the nearest Ryanair flies to Toronto and Nairobi, respectively. Get a bus the rest of the way. Oxygen mask is extra. Toilet is extra. Qualified pilot is extra.

Cullen82 · 11-01-2011 02:59PM

snyper wrote: »

Dude-

3 months?? The first year of a relationship is called the honeymoon period. Its all love and oral... But i wouldnt advise you making life decisions based on 3 months with a woman.

A woman is like an onion and all that.. you havent even peeled off the first layer..

I know you're dead right, I've thought about this also. I've had several long term relationsips 2/3 years and believe I have my head screwed on the right way.

But considering your post, How do you suggest in these circumstances I continue/progress the relationship AFTER the honeymoon period we've been having? I cant do it on skype so I either forget about her or go to Canada to see her................

STForSale · 11-01-2011 03:02PM

If she's leaving you even after you saved her life, she is obviously an ungreatful b1tch.
Move on is my advise.

fakearms123 · 11-01-2011 03:03PM

Love can develop over time, sometimes you might fall in love within the first second of meeting someone and sometimes love jumps up on after a few months or even years of knowing someone, its a very complicated funny thing love. From the sounds of things you have already made up your mind.

Take the risk, if you only thing you lose by going for this girl is your job then you will get over it but if you don't take the risk to find out if she's the one or whatever then you are most likely going to lose the best thing that can happen to someone and that is FALL IN LOVE AAWWWW

best of luck!

Donal Og O Baelach · 11-01-2011 03:05PM

Cullen82 wrote: »

Alright alright alright, Long time since I last posted ! Good to be back:D

I have a right head melting situation so looking for words of wisdom/advice whatever, I'm over in Africa working as a Tour Leader for an Overland Company....So I start the job in mid October, I've come to the end of my first trip and fly back to Nairobi to start my next one tomorrow and work my way down over 3 months to Cape Town again...Happy days eh? Well it would be only for the fact that I met someone on the trip who I tried not to become attached to..... but did....and so did she. We said goodbye to each other this morning and shes on her way back home in a few days......to CANADA....I've never met someone so made for me in my entire life...shes fecking A - mazing. I'm 28 by the way.

She wants me to go visit her in Canada after my next trip (circa April) which I most certainly want to do, In fact I'm more excited about seeing her again than seeing this unbelievably amazing continent again.....It's easily possible for me to do it during my next break between trips but if I decide to go, For me, it means Im serious about this girl being "the one" which will in turn will mean I'll end up leaving this "dream job" for whats obviously going to be a risk (the relationship) whatever way I look at it.

Any thoughts? The job is basically gone if I want any sort of future with her...I've already begun thinking of WH Visa for Canada.

Thanks After Hours,

Cullen82

Come on Tommy, stop staring out that window. Your daughter will be over to take you for a drive on Saturday - take the blue pills with your cup of tea and get back into bed.

zumobishopreal · 11-01-2011 03:06PM

DO IT!

kerryman12 · 11-01-2011 03:29PM

pickarooney wrote: »

Don't decide anything until after your next trip, but by all means keep in contact with her. If you still feel as strongly about one another after that then you'll soon come to understand what means most to you.

what he said.

PS
as you are in "deepest darkest africa" write a letter and post it - chics dig that stuff :pac: Alternatively get a SAT phone.

Swampy · 11-01-2011 03:34PM

What would facekicker do??

MIRMIR82 · 11-01-2011 03:39PM

fakearms123 wrote: »

Love can develop over time, sometimes you might fall in love within the first second of meeting someone and sometimes love jumps up on after a few months or even years of knowing someone, its a very complicated funny thing love. From the sounds of things you have already made up your mind. Take the risk, if you only thing you lose by going for this girl is your job then you will get over it but if you don't take the risk to find out if she's the one or whatever then you are most likely going to lose the best thing that can happen to someone and that is FALL IN LOVE AAWWWW best of luck!

Awwww fakearms i didnt know you were so romantic.....pet:)

TPD · 11-01-2011 03:45PM

Flip a coin. If whatever decision the coin makes goes tits up, you can blame the coin and not yourself. Woo!

stovelid · 11-01-2011 03:53PM

Swampy wrote: »

What would facekicker do??

Get namechecked on boards for the next 1000 years despite being a one-trick pony?

ibarelycare · 11-01-2011 03:53PM

Cullen82 wrote: »

Alright alright alright, Long time since I last posted ! Good to be back:D

I have a right head melting situation so looking for words of wisdom/advice whatever, I'm over in Africa working as a Tour Leader for an Overland Company....So I start the job in mid October, I've come to the end of my first trip and fly back to Nairobi to start my next one tomorrow and work my way down over 3 months to Cape Town again...Happy days eh? Well it would be only for the fact that I met someone on the trip who I tried not to become attached to..... but did....and so did she. We said goodbye to each other this morning and shes on her way back home in a few days......to CANADA....I've never met someone so made for me in my entire life...shes fecking A - mazing. I'm 28 by the way.

She wants me to go visit her in Canada after my next trip (circa April) which I most certainly want to do, In fact I'm more excited about seeing her again than seeing this unbelievably amazing continent again.....It's easily possible for me to do it during my next break between trips but if I decide to go, For me, it means Im serious about this girl being "the one" which will in turn will mean I'll end up leaving this "dream job" for whats obviously going to be a risk (the relationship) whatever way I look at it.

Any thoughts? The job is basically gone if I want any sort of future with her...I've already begun thinking of WH Visa for Canada.

Thanks After Hours,

Cullen82

I knew something like this would happen you out there :P

Micky Dolenz · 11-01-2011 04:01PM

Is she pregnant? If not, be thankful of your lucky escape.

youcancallmeal · 11-01-2011 04:04PM

lol, posting a serious question in after hours :pac:

Anyway I did one of those 3 month Cape Town to Nairobi overland tours last year and I met and talked to a lot of the guides from the various different companies. Most of the Kenyans were just doing it to support their families, they had been at it for years and you could see any sense of wonder and interest had long ago been drained out of them. Most Europeans/Aus/Nz people I met said they got sick of it after their 3/4th time doing it and that the average length of time people do that job is a year. I'm sure you've met these old hands yourself? Basically my point is you'll probably be sick of that job in a year and then be left wondering what would have happened had you really tried hard to pursue the relationship with the Canadian girl?

On the other the fact you met her while she was on holidays and it was probably like a holiday to you too would be of concern. Also remember flying from Africa to Canada is going to cost you serious money!

ScumLord · 11-01-2011 04:08PM

Marry her on the sly, in Africa that makes her your property and she won't be able to go anywhere without your permission.

How the hell do I decide this one?!

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