Making love to a fly

fakearms123 · 10-06-2010 01:56PM #1

I was just reading one of the threads there about appeasing your lover's fetish and I was thinking about some of the sick things that I was told throughout my life of what people have done to get themselves off and then the story I was told back in school resurfaced in my mind, my poor mind.

There was this filthy lad back in school who would eat his snots, pick is ass and smell his finger, etc type of guy, well one day a group of us were chatting to him and he told us that he was having a bath the other night when a fly flew in the window. He said that he was playing with himself at his moment and the fly was buzzing around him and throwing his focus from the task at hand (haha pun), anyway he managed to catch the fly. He pulled off the fly's wings, let the helmet of his member rise to surface so it was like an island, then he placed the fly on his helmet and let it buzz around on top of him. He said that within a few seconds he erupted all over the fly and the bath.

This story freaked me out and felt actually sick after he told us.

Has anyone else ever heard of someone doing something fetishy of the most bizarre kind before?

El Guapo! · 10-06-2010 01:59PM

Oh sweet mother of Jebus.................:eek:

Pighead · 10-06-2010 02:00PM

You should change your username to fakefriend123. You're a sick sick puppy.

MarkR · 10-06-2010 02:00PM

*unplugs internet*

Kasabian · 10-06-2010 02:01PM

I feel sad

PaddyBomb · 10-06-2010 02:02PM

Haha what a freak....

...Who takes baths these days!

kfallon · 10-06-2010 02:03PM

He didn't really 'make love' to the fly, he just came all over it's tits.......

Btw I don't think you can class it as 'making love'

girlyhappyface · 10-06-2010 02:03PM

I know someone who tried to have sex with a sofa once. In the cracks between the cushions. It didn't work.

Wazdakka · 10-06-2010 02:03PM

Dean09 wrote: »

Oh sweet mother of Jebus.................:eek:

MarkR wrote: »

*unplugs internet*

Kasabian wrote: »

I feel sad

You pussies wouldn't last 5 min on "the real internet"

littlefriend · 10-06-2010 02:03PM

Speechless.
Honestly feel ill after reading that.

alwaysadub · 10-06-2010 02:05PM

aww the poor fly probably drowned in a sea of cum!

There's worse ways to go i suppose..

fakearms123 · 10-06-2010 02:06PM

Wazdakka wrote: »

You pussies wouldn't last 5 min on "the real internet"

Whats the "real internet"? And here i have spent all this time on the fake internet, oblivious! So many wasted nights! *smashes grandmother's ming vase*

daithiolabhrai · 10-06-2010 02:06PM

That is actually so disgusting it's unreal. I've heard fetish stories, etc before, but that one beats them all.

Waterloo Sunset · 10-06-2010 02:06PM

Isn't this story described word for word on Ricky Gervais's Animals show?

This sounds fishy...

Edit: Link!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOcUAEdbyn4

ejmaztec · 10-06-2010 02:07PM

I heard about someone with fake arms shagging a fly in the bath once, just before he went on the internet to tell everyone about it.

Shryke · 10-06-2010 02:07PM

fakearms123 wrote: »

He said that he was playing with himself at his moment and the fly was buzzing around him and throwing his focus from the task at hand (haha pun), anyway he managed to catch the fly. He pulled off the fly's wings, let the helmet of his member rise to surface so it was like an island, then he placed the fly on his helmet and let it buzz around on top of him. He said that within a few seconds he erupted all over the fly and the bath.

This story freaked me out and felt actually sick after he told us.

Has anyone else ever heard of someone doing something fetishy of the most bizarre kind before?

This is from Ricky Gervais stand up, I believe.

stovelid · 10-06-2010 02:07PM

Real men do it with hornets.

we'llallhavetea_old · 10-06-2010 02:08PM

mwahaha! i laughed

onemorechance · 10-06-2010 02:11PM

Shryke wrote: »

This is from Ricky Gervais stand up, I believe.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOcUAEdbyn4

consultech · 10-06-2010 02:13PM

Ricky Gervais "Animals" live show, in fairness.

fakearms123 · 10-06-2010 02:17PM

Waterloo Sunset wrote: »

Isn't this story described word for word on Ricky Gervais's Animals show?

This sounds fishy...

Edit: Link!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOcUAEdbyn4

holy crap! i've never seen this one before, this makes a lot of sense considering he told us around 2004/2005, thats actually some relief!

Wazdakka · 10-06-2010 02:18PM

fakearms123 wrote: »

Whats the "real internet"? And here i have spent all this time on the fake internet, oblivious! So many wasted nights! *smashes grandmother's ming vase*

Boards is a nice little sheltered and moderated port of safety in the sea of the internetz...
A place of swear filters,
A place where open references to obscene sexual acts and illegal downloading of media are censored not encouraged.

Minstrel27 · 10-06-2010 02:30PM

fakearms123 wrote: »

I was just reading one of the threads there about appeasing your lover's fetish and I was thinking about some of the sick things that I was told throughout my life of what people have done to get themselves off and then the story I was told back in school resurfaced in my mind, my poor mind.

There was this filthy lad back in school who would eat his snots, pick is ass and smell his finger, etc type of guy, well one day a group of us were chatting to him and he told us that he was having a bath the other night when a fly flew in the window. He said that he was playing with himself at his moment and the fly was buzzing around him and throwing his focus from the task at hand (haha pun), anyway he managed to catch the fly. He pulled off the fly's wings, let the helmet of his member rise to surface so it was like an island, then he placed the fly on his helmet and let it buzz around on top of him. He said that within a few seconds he erupted all over the fly and the bath.

This story freaked me out and felt actually sick after he told us.

Has anyone else ever heard of someone doing something fetishy of the most bizarre kind before?

You went to school with Ricky Gervais?

consultech · 10-06-2010 02:33PM

Minstrel27 wrote: »

You went to school with Ricky Gervais?

No, he is Ricky Gervais! It was RG's mate who did it originally!

Minstrel27 · 10-06-2010 02:37PM

consultech wrote: »

No, he is Ricky Gervais! It was RG's mate who did it originally!

They could have a mutual friend.

GoldCobra · 10-06-2010 02:57PM

This threads disgusting, I don't wanna hear about Jeff Goldblums sex life.:mad:

ScumLord · 10-06-2010 02:58PM

Dean09 wrote: »

Oh sweet mother of Jebus.................:eek:

So it works then?

pickarooney · 10-06-2010 03:01PM

And all the girls say: a pretty fly for a white guy

bnt · 10-06-2010 03:01PM

I lived in South Africa for a few years, and I heard stories about what teenage boys did on rural farms. Put it this way: suckling calves don't bite their mothers in the udder, so it's supposedly quite safe to let one suckle on you ... :eek:

Banned Account · 10-06-2010 03:03PM

bnt wrote: »

I lived in South Africa for a few years, and I heard stories about what teenage boys did on rural farms. Put it this way: suckling calves don't bite their mothers in the udder, so it's supposedly quite safe to let one suckle on you ... :eek:

How's the moobs issue going? Are you still considering removal?

itsallaboutheL · 10-06-2010 03:07PM

I just watched the link, and OPs Post is ten times funnier.

Making love to a fly

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