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How compassionate are you?

  • 14-05-2010 11:48PM
    #1
    the keen edge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭the keen edge


    There's an email doing the rounds containing images of a car accident in north America. The fatally injured victim was purportedly texting on a mobile phone when he drifted into the path of a oncoming lorry.

    The images show the initial crash scene of the entangled vehicles, and also the graphic images of the victim being removed from his car. These pictures are truly sickening and left me feeling hollow, partly due to the desperately graphic nature of these pictures, but more so that I had witnessed this poor man in such a helpless and terminal state after such a violet death.

    I felt that by viewing these photographs, I had myself eroded some bit of the victims dignity. With this playing on my mind I decided to try and find out the name of this unfortunate soul, and at least acknowledge who he was.

    This search only led me to more 'blog's' detailing the deaths of people in violent accidents. One of these blog's contained a video of a man cut in two after an accident but remarkable still alive.

    I didn't view the video but read the comments relating to it.
    Seemingly the victim of this accident is seen talking away, calmly, whist lying dying in the middle of the road, however despite a crowd of people standing in the background not one person goes towards the poor man who is obliviously facing the end of his life.
    I cant imagine a more lonesome place for someone.

    I've been by the death bed of family members, but never near the death of someone due to a violent accident where I would have had the choice to walk away.

    So here's my question, If you came on the scene of such an occurrence would you be able to 'man up' and show compassion to someone who was obliviously in the last moments of their life, or would you turn your head and coward in the background?. Or maybe you have found yourself in this position?

    I dearly hope I would have the strength of character to help some on their way.


«13

Comments

  • #2
    MrStuffins
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,646 ✭✭✭✭MrStuffins


    Sh*t happens!

    I wouldnt be running out into traffic for anyone (apart for family)

    (I'm also presuming his accident was a motor accident)


  • #3
    Slugs
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,282 ✭✭✭Slugs


    And if he asked you to put him out of his misery, would you have the compassion to do so?


  • #4
    epgc3fyqirnbsx
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,228 ✭✭✭epgc3fyqirnbsx


    Don't know if it bears thinking about, a situation like that cannot be anticipated, you could turn into a superhuman hero or a snivelling wreck, who knows.
    I'd like to think the former but I dont know


  • #5
    Dyr
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,246 ✭✭✭✭Dyr


    the keen edge wrote: »
    This search only led me to more 'blog's' detailing the deaths of people in violent accidents. One of these blog's contained a video of a man cut in two after an accident but remarkable still alive.

    I didn't view the video but read the comments relating to it.
    Seemingly the victim of this accident is seen talking away, calmly, whist lying dying in the middle of the road, however despite a crowd of people standing in the background not one person goes towards the poor man who is obliviously facing the end of his life.
    I cant imagine a more lonesome place for someone.



    I dearly hope I would have the strength of character to help some on their way.

    I've seen that video..it's bizarre that there's people just casually standing around the poor c**t, must be a cultural thing. :mad:


  • #6
    the keen edge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭the keen edge


    Slugs wrote: »
    And if he asked you to put him out of his misery, would you have the compassion to do so?

    No, I don't think I could. That would take some doing.


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  • #7
    Charlie.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 78 ✭✭Charlie.


    I would like to think I would comfort them in any way I could but I don't think anyone could truly say how they would react unless you were faced with that situation.


  • #8
    DarkJager
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,960 ✭✭✭DarkJager


    I would stop to help in any way I could in such a circumstance. You need to remember that that person is somebodies child, a loved member of a family somewhere.


  • #9
    entropi
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,731 ✭✭✭✭entropi


    Already possessing a compassionate side and first aid skills, my first instinct would be to help out if I could, but sometimes its not always the best thing to do...sometimes its better to leave them there incase of internal or spinal injury. Unless it is life-threatening, you should just call emergency services and comfort them as best you can.

    Although, having been a viewer of /b/ for a number of years now, I can't help wonder how I managed to hold on to any sense of normality :P


  • #10
    Slugs
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,282 ✭✭✭Slugs


    Master of Nothing wrote:
    Although, having been a viewer of /b/ for a number of years now, I can't help wonder how I managed to hold on to any sense of normality

    I know what you mean, /b/ has a greater effect than alcohol for killing brain cells, intellect and judgement... Among other things... :P


  • #11
    Anne Thankful Duckling
    Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭ Anne Thankful Duckling


    That's being used as a PSA in the States, isn't it? I thought our Don't Drink and Drive ads were graphic. I think I just threw up a little.


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  • #12
    YouTalkinToMe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 125 ✭✭YouTalkinToMe


    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?threadid=2055258370

    Last been the word


  • #13
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    The victim was texting someone & then hit an oncoming lorry?

    And you ask if I have compassion for him? F*ck that sh*t. It was his own f*cking fault. Driving a car is not something you do while you do something else, like reading a newspaper or fixing your hair. You need to give it your full concentration or you could end up dead. And he did. A lesson learned the hard way.

    He was a tit. The person I would feel real compassion for is the unfortunate lorry driver whose car he hit & who has to bear the life long burden of having inadvertantly caused the end of someone else's life.


  • #14
    McChubbin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,080 ✭✭✭McChubbin


    Previously, I would have walked away, not knowing what to do with the situation but following recent events in whcih I witnessed my own grandmother on her death bed, I would stay, if only to offer comfort during what would be a very distressing death.
    Nothing more horrid that dying alone, methinks.


  • #15
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    The victim was texting someone & then hit an oncoming lorry?

    And you ask if I have compassion for him? F*ck that sh*t. It was his own f*cking fault. Driving a car is not something you do while you do something else, like reading a newspaper or fixing your hair. You need to give it your full concentration or you could end up dead. And he did. A lesson learned the hard way.

    He was a tit. The person I would feel real compassion for is the unfortunate lorry driver whose car he hit & who has to bear the life long burden of having inadvertantly caused the end of someone else's life.

    That quite a ferocious dose of Moralism you've contracted there. Does it itch?


  • #16
    davyjose
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,287 ✭✭✭davyjose


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    The victim was texting someone & then hit an oncoming lorry?

    And you ask if I have compassion for him? F*ck that sh*t. It was his own f*cking fault. Driving a car is not something you do while you do something else, like reading a newspaper or fixing your hair. You need to give it your full concentration or you could end up dead. And he did. A lesson learned the hard way.

    He was a tit. The person I would feel real compassion for is the unfortunate lorry driver whose car he hit & who has to bear the life long burden of having inadvertantly caused the end of someone else's life.

    So you have no compassion for anyone who is the victim of their own bad judgement/mistake?

    Get off your fcuking high-horse. I've seen a lot of ridiculously excessive, belligerently hostile bouts of righteousness in this place, but this is right at the top.


  • #17
    liah
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,750 ✭✭✭liah


    Yes, starbelgrade, he clearly deserved to die an absolutely horrible, painful death just because he sent a text while driving. Clearly, this should be the punishment for all those who commit this offense, regardless of what else they have done in their life, whether or not they have children or a family. Definitely. :rolleyes:

    Some people do deserve to die a horrible death. Pedophiles, murderers, etc. A guy who texts while driving? Are you serious? Sure, he's being an idiot, but he hardly deserves to die violently because of it.

    Get some goddamn perspective.


  • #18
    the keen edge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭the keen edge


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    The victim was texting someone & then hit an oncoming lorry?

    And you ask if I have compassion for him? F*ck that sh*t. It was his own f*cking fault. Driving a car is not something you do while you do something else, like reading a newspaper or fixing your hair. You need to give it your full concentration or you could end up dead. And he did. A lesson learned the hard way.

    He was a tit. The person I would feel real compassion for is the unfortunate lorry driver whose car he hit & who has to bear the life long burden of having inadvertantly caused the end of someone else's life.

    I wasn't asking if you would show compassion, in particular, to the individual involved in the texting accident, but to any victim of a horrific accident in general.

    I should of made it clear that due to the circumstances of the above accident the victim must have suffered instance death, and there would not have been a opportunity to show him compassion. And like yourself I would feel awful for somebody who through no fault of their only, found themselves caught up in such a terrible event.

    Are you saying that if you find yourself at the scene of some tragic occurrence(and touch wood you wont), you will stand there and judge if a sole victim is deserving of your compassion?


  • #19
    Anne Thankful Duckling
    Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭ Anne Thankful Duckling


    Well, I would feel compassion for him, but not as much as I would for someone he'd hit and killed while texting. I mean, yeah, we all make mistakes but when you get behind a wheel, you're taking responsibility for yourself and everyone else on the road. I was in an accident a few years ago where a girl was texting and forced my mum to go into a ditch to avoid a head-on collision. She was a complete airhead type, she had been texting, and she said 'oh, I do that all the time hee hee.' Stupid, selfish woman. We could easily have been killed or ended up in wheelchairs through no fault of our own and this idiot still didn't seem to grasp how serious it was. Perhaps this horrible PSA will do its job and get it into peoples' heads that you don't text and drive. But would I feel sorry for the guy, absolutely. What a horrible end.


  • #20
    the keen edge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭the keen edge


    [quote=[Deleted User];65900815]Well, I would feel compassion for him, but not as much as I would for someone he'd hit and killed while texting. I mean, yeah, we all make mistakes but when you get behind a wheel, you're taking responsibility for yourself and everyone else on the road. I was in an accident a few years ago where a girl was texting and forced my mum to go into a ditch to avoid a head-on collision. She was a complete airhead type, she had been texting, and she said 'oh, I do that all the time hee hee.' Stupid, selfish woman. We could easily have been killed or ended up in wheelchairs through no fault of our own and this idiot still didn't seem to grasp how serious it was. Perhaps this horrible PSA will do its job and get it into peoples' heads that you don't text and drive. But would I feel sorry for the guy, absolutely. What a horrible end.[/QUOTE]

    I wasn't sure earlier what a PSA was, but the email I was referring to is no PSA. The images were pictures taken by some 'photographer' who arrived on the scene. Absolutely sickening, I really felt depressed after seeing them.

    Is there no regulation/law regarding putting up images like this on the web? I feel awful thinking that this man's poor family would be aware of the existence of these snaps.
    Post edited by Boards.ie: Mike on


  • #21
    Anne Thankful Duckling
    Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭ Anne Thankful Duckling


    the keen edge wrote: »
    I wasn't sure earlier what a PSA was, but the email I was referring to is no PSA. The images were pictures taken by some 'photographer' who arrived on the scene. Absolutely sickening, I really felt depressed after seeing them.

    Is there no regulation/law regarding putting up images like this on the web? I feel awful thinking that this man's poor family would be aware of the existence of these snaps.

    I think they later used the pics for a campaign, but I could be wrong. Perhaps the ones I saw were a different accident. I don't think there is a law about this, or if it is, it isn't enforced. I know when there were autopsy pics of the singer Selena floating around, her family had them all pulled down.


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  • #22
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    liah wrote: »
    Yes, starbelgrade, he clearly deserved to die an absolutely horrible, painful death just because he sent a text while driving. Clearly, this should be the punishment for all those who commit this offense, regardless of what else they have done in their life, whether or not they have children or a family. Definitely. :rolleyes:

    Some people do deserve to die a horrible death. Pedophiles, murderers, etc. A guy who texts while driving? Are you serious? Sure, he's being an idiot, but he hardly deserves to die violently because of it.

    Get some goddamn perspective.


    Did I say that he deserved to die a horrible, painful death? Did I? No I f*cking well didn't, so stop putting words in my mouth.


  • #23
    --LOS--
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,028 ✭✭✭✭--LOS--


    [quote=[Deleted User];65900815]Well, I would feel compassion for him, but not as much as I would for someone he'd hit and killed while texting. I mean, yeah, we all make mistakes but when you get behind a wheel, you're taking responsibility for yourself and everyone else on the road. I was in an accident a few years ago where a girl was texting and forced my mum to go into a ditch to avoid a head-on collision. She was a complete airhead type, she had been texting, and she said 'oh, I do that all the time hee hee.' Stupid, selfish woman. We could easily have been killed or ended up in wheelchairs through no fault of our own and this idiot still didn't seem to grasp how serious it was. Perhaps this horrible PSA will do its job and get it into peoples' heads that you don't text and drive. But would I feel sorry for the guy, absolutely. What a horrible end.[/QUOTE]

    That is the kind of thing that makes me hate driving.
    As for compassion in the moment, I wouldn't be walking off leaving them to die on their own or videoing them but afterwards I would feel better knowing at least they didn't harm anyone else with their carelessness, like other people have said I'd have more compassion for those harmed as a result of an idiot driver or the lorry driver traumatised for life from an incident like this.
    Post edited by Boards.ie: Mike on


  • #24
    the keen edge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭the keen edge


    Lots of interesting posts to this thread.

    To be honest I'am surprised by some of them.
    I myself would think that to show true compassion to someone, in their last moments of life, wouldn't involve judging them or the situation at hand.

    Its a interesting feature of some of the posts, that some people need to assign blame, and establish the 'guilty' and 'innocent' parties before considering who is deserving of their compassion.


  • #25
    starbelgrade
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,739 ✭✭✭✭starbelgrade


    the keen edge wrote: »

    Are you saying that if you find yourself at the scene of some tragic occurrence(and touch wood you wont), you will stand there and judge if a sole victim is deserving of your compassion?

    Look, I'm not completely heartless, so yes, of course I would feel some amount of empathy for the guy.

    However, my point still stands - if you get into a car & don't give it your full attention, you are asking for trouble. Whether you are texting, or have been using drink or drugs, the result can be the same & if you end up in an accident, you really have no-one else to blame but yourself.


  • #26
    storm2811
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,183 ✭✭✭storm2811


    Just seen that video of the guy who was cut in half..I would probably cry from shock or something,or because it was such a strange unexpected thing to happen I wouldn't know what to do in that situation.

    If I was able gather my thoughts and think straight i would probably try and comfort the person in a way though..but if they asked me to "put them out of their misery" I could never do that,even if it was what they really wanted,I still wouldn't feel right after..


  • #27
    InkSlinger67
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,756 ✭✭✭InkSlinger67


    I've been in life threatening situations before due to my own stupidity and all I could think of at the time were John McClane quotes


  • #28
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    Look, I'm not completely heartless, so yes, of course I would feel some amount of empathy for the guy.

    However, my point still stands - if you get into a car & don't give it your full attention, you are asking for trouble. Whether you are texting, or have been using drink or drugs, the result can be the same & if you end up in an accident, you really have no-one else to blame but yourself.


    I agree with you.

    Of course nobody wants to see someone die so horrifically. But common sense must prevail. Texting and driving is against the law. You couldn't get a driving license without knowing this.

    I'm not saying that this doesn't sadden me, of course it does. But why attack someone who is honest enough to point out the obvious?

    Sheep only impress sheep.


  • #29
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 53,068 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Abigayle wrote: »

    Of course nobody wants to see someone die so horrifically. But common sense must prevail. Texting and driving is against the law. You couldn't get a driving license without knowing this.
    .

    Everyone on this planet is guilty of doing something stupid. Everyone. Fortunately not all have such dire consequences. And maybe if the man had killed someone because of his stupidity I would feel differently but jesus, a man dies because he sends a text... surely there must be some compassion??

    If you died doing something that you probably shouldn't have been doing, I would hope that compassion was shown towards you, and not the attitude of "well tough, if she hadn't been doing that, she'd still be alive" and I know your response will be "yeh they'll be right too, if I am the stupid cause of my own death then so be it" but life isn't, and shouldn't be, like that.


  • #30
    the keen edge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,533 ✭✭✭the keen edge


    starbelgrade wrote: »
    Look, I'm not completely heartless, so yes, of course I would feel some amount of empathy for the guy.

    However, my point still stands - if you get into a car & don't give it your full attention, you are asking for trouble. Whether you are texting, or have been using drink or drugs, the result can be the same & if you end up in an accident, you really have no-one else to blame but yourself.

    Of course your not heartless starbelgrade, I wasn't suggesting you were.

    And like I said before I agree with above points.
    I remember hearing an Engineering lecturer saying before that there is no such thing as an accident; If you examine the events leading up to an accident someone along the line failed in their responsibilities somehow, and as such in every accident some person, or persons are to blame.
    If everyone did their bit, and looked after their own business the world would be a far safer place.

    I think the thread went off in its own direction.
    What I was trying to enquire into, was the conferring of compassion on individuals who find themselves standing at the door of death, knowing they cannot turn around, and all choices for them are gone.
    The type of desolation they can only know.


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  • #31
    Anne Thankful Duckling
    Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭ Anne Thankful Duckling


    Deleted User wrote: »
    Everyone on this planet is guilty of doing something stupid. Everyone. Fortunately not all have such dire consequences. And maybe if the man had killed someone because of his stupidity I would feel differently but jesus, a man dies because he sends a text... surely there must be some compassion??

    If you died doing something that you probably shouldn't have been doing, I would hope that compassion was shown towards you, and not the attitude of "well tough, if she hadn't been doing that, she'd still be alive" and I know your response will be "yeh they'll be right too, if I am the stupid cause of my own death then so be it" but life isn't, and shouldn't be, like that.

    There are many different degrees of 'doing something stupid'. If someone takes a drug overdose at home and collapses and dies, they haven't put anyone else in danger. If a pilot has a few drinks in the airport bar before getting into the cockpit of a 747, that's far more serious because he's endangered other peoples' lives.

    It's not like there are conditions for compassion, but there are degrees of compassion just like there are degrees of carelessness. Why shouldn't they correlate?


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