Floraphilia- should it be legal?

cantankerous · 08-03-2010 09:14PM #1

Hi there. Today i'm going to talk about a shocking and depraved perversion known as florophilia (a sexual attraction to plants).

Ok, so maybe it's not as bad as bestiality or paedophilia but is no-one else here shocked by the amount of societal acceptance of this mental illness?

For example one female collegue of mine recently admitted (albeit drunkenly) to regularly engaging in sex acts with all sort of plants, particularly cucumbers :eek:.

Sure, you don't have the animal cruelty argument, but you still have the evidence of a sick mind which is what counts.

Is it time we locked up these people to protect society?

Should we start looking into ways of curing them?

Fago! · 08-03-2010 09:19PM

The female collegue isn't weird, she's clearly just mad for large penis. And clearly the people she know's and work with have a lack off that.

Dunjohn · 08-03-2010 09:22PM

Down with this sort of thing.

Mike 1972 · 08-03-2010 09:23PM

Atari Jaguar !

Fago! · 08-03-2010 09:23PM

Rabble rabble rabble

the keen edge · 08-03-2010 09:23PM

cantankerous wrote: »

Hi there. Today i'm going to talk about a shocking and depraved perversion known as florophilia (a sexual attraction to plants).

Ok, so maybe it's not as bad as bestiality or paedophilia but is no-one else here shocked by the amount of societal acceptance of this mental illness?

For example one female collegue of mine recently admitted (albeit drunkenly) to regularly engaging in sex acts with all sort of plants, particularly cucumbers :eek:.

Sure, you don't have the animal cruelty argument, but you still have the evidence of a sick mind which is what counts.

Is it time we locked up these people to protect society?

Should we start looking into ways of curing them?

I had a affair with pineapple once, it left me heartbroken and in need of medical attention. I have since moved on, although the incontinence is here to stay:o

xw2lj9uspm1eyh · 08-03-2010 09:24PM

I thought this thread was going to be about the sexual attraction to the margarine

.

galwayrush · 08-03-2010 09:25PM

Pansies?

congo_90 · 08-03-2010 09:25PM

cantankerous wrote: »

Hi there. Today i'm going to talk about a shocking and depraved perversion known as florophilia (a sexual attraction to plants).

Ok, so maybe it's not as bad as bestiality or paedophilia but is no-one else here shocked by the amount of societal acceptance of this mental illness?

For example one female collegue of mine recently admitted (albeit drunkenly) to regularly engaging in sex acts with all sort of plants, particularly cucumbers :eek:.

Sure, you don't have the animal cruelty argument, but you still have the evidence of a sick mind which is what counts.

Is it time we locked up these people to protect society?

Should we start looking into ways of curing them?

Pics or GTFO Seriously...

Rented Mule · 08-03-2010 09:25PM

mendusa wrote: »

I thought this thread was going to be about the sexual attraction to the margarine .

Ahhhhhh ...the mystery and the majesty of the margerine.

Dunjohn · 08-03-2010 09:28PM

Personally, I think the talking wheat strand in the McVities ad is smokin'.

Dudess · 08-03-2010 09:33PM

Weed need to gard(en) society from this depravity - I don't think we can fully grassp the seriousness of it. Anyone who argues against that can just shrub...

captainjack · 08-03-2010 09:48PM

They took our jobs!!

stellarartois · 08-03-2010 09:49PM

Class thread, YEAH BOY!

Minstrel27 · 08-03-2010 09:55PM

cantankerous wrote: »

Hi there. Today i'm going to talk about a shocking and depraved perversion known as florophilia (a sexual attraction to plants).

Ok, so maybe it's not as bad as bestiality or paedophilia but is no-one else here shocked by the amount of societal acceptance of this mental illness?

For example one female collegue of mine recently admitted (albeit drunkenly) to regularly engaging in sex acts with all sort of plants, particularly cucumbers :eek:.

Sure, you don't have the animal cruelty argument, but you still have the evidence of a sick mind which is what counts.

Is it time we locked up these people to protect society?

Should we start looking into ways of curing them?

LOL. That is all.

AnonoBoy · 08-03-2010 09:58PM

Dudess wrote: »

Weed need to gard(en) society from this depravity - I don't think we can fully grassp the seriousness of it. Anyone who argues against that can just shrub...

Awful. Truly awful. I love it!

Speaking from my own experience I had a fling a few years back with a cauliflower. I was a bit green back then and even though it was never really a salad relationship I radish the memories to this day.

Ruu_Old · 08-03-2010 09:59PM

Dudess wrote: »

Weed need to gard(en) society from this depravity - I don't think we can fully grassp the seriousness of it. Anyone who argues against that can just shrub...

Ouch, that stings!

Bolag_the_2nd · 08-03-2010 10:07PM

cantankerous wrote: »

Hi there. Today i'm going to talk about a shocking and depraved perversion known as florophilia (a sexual attraction to plants).

Ok, so maybe it's not as bad as bestiality or paedophilia but is no-one else here shocked by the amount of societal acceptance of this mental illness?

For example one female collegue of mine recently admitted (albeit drunkenly) to regularly engaging in sex acts with all sort of plants, particularly cucumbers :eek:.

Sure, you don't have the animal cruelty argument, but you still have the evidence of a sick mind which is what counts.

Is it time we locked up these people to protect society?

Should we start looking into ways of curing them?

why would anyone admit to this, i'll never enjoy the humble cucumber again, (as in eat that is)

GirlOfGlass · 08-03-2010 10:07PM

cantankerous wrote: »

Hi there. Today i'm going to talk about a shocking and depraved perversion known as florophilia (a sexual attraction to plants).

Ok, so maybe it's not as bad as bestiality or paedophilia but is no-one else here shocked by the amount of societal acceptance of this mental illness?

For example one female collegue of mine recently admitted (albeit drunkenly) to regularly engaging in sex acts with all sort of plants, particularly cucumbers :eek:.

Sure, you don't have the animal cruelty argument, but you still have the evidence of a sick mind which is what counts.

Is it time we locked up these people to protect society?

Should we start looking into ways of curing them?

Haaahahaha, that's ****ed up! But sure, let them do whatever they want with their plants behind closed doors.

Dudess · 08-03-2010 10:08PM

Ruu wrote: »

Ouch, that stings!

You've some nectar criticise my post like that! :mad:

AnonoBoy · 08-03-2010 10:14PM

Dudess wrote: »

You've some nectar criticise my post like that! :mad:

Just take it easy. Lettuce all be calm.

Thomas828 · 08-03-2010 10:54PM

I'm just crazy about Daisy, I cry a lot for Violet, I wouldn't marry for gold, but I will go for Marigold. And I'm not even mentioning Rosie, Got a whole lotta Rosie!!!

Formal shorts · 08-03-2010 10:57PM

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Just take it easy. Lettuce all be calm.

How can I be calm when I'm so angry from my head tomato :mad:

bonerm · 08-03-2010 11:03PM

Dudess wrote: »

Weed need to gard(en) society from this depravity - I don't think we can fully grassp the seriousness of it. Anyone who argues against that can just shrub...

I'm certainly lichen this effort.

Dudess · 08-03-2010 11:06PM

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Just take it easy. Lettuce all be calm.

That's true - if we are to sucseed in weeding out these perverts...

Canard · 08-03-2010 11:08PM

The problem seems to root itself in all these horrible puns. :pac:

m@cc@ · 08-03-2010 11:10PM

It's not floraphilia, it's faunacation. It's odd how thyme and again these stories crop up. I think the problem stems from childhood. Maybe it's a sign of the fushcia.

galwayrush · 08-03-2010 11:11PM

Every rose has a thorn.:o

Formal shorts · 08-03-2010 11:12PM

Patchy~ wrote: »

The problem seems to root itself in all these horrible puns. :pac:

Don't make light of the issue, vegetables are getting graped here!

galwayrush · 08-03-2010 11:12PM

Seriously, does birching count? i mean is it really wrong? Just asking.....:pac:

Jev/N · 08-03-2010 11:21PM

epic plant pun

/thread

Floraphilia- should it be legal?

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