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  • #32
    postcynical
    Closed Accounts Posts: 341 ✭✭postcynical


    Dades wrote: »
    So should they take communion too?
    If somebody innocently takes communion by following the crowd, or somebody has good intentions then it's not really a problem for anyone. But for a non-believer who knows what communion means it would be more respectful to not take it. However, sometimes lapsed Catholics take these occasions to make their own peace with God, even if just temporarily so I hope I'd never judge any of my atheist friends who received at a funeral.
    I think you've answered the OP, however, in that there are people who sit at funerals judging other people on the basis of how much of a charade they put on.
    Surely not. What a sad state of affairs:(

    Can believers not just focus on God's presence and prayers for the deceased and non-believers not just focus on the deceased and their memory and loved ones' grief. Surely people can get over their adolescent point-scoring on such occasions?


  • #33
    Xluna
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,329 ✭✭✭Xluna


    Despite the vile atheist that I am, I would have no problem offering lip service in a religious funeral. They just lost a loved one.There grief is more important to me than my principles. Have a bit more empathy lads.


  • #34
    BrianCalgary
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,196 ✭✭✭BrianCalgary


    Xluna wrote: »
    Despite the vile atheist that I am, I would have no problem offering lip service in a religious funeral. They just lost a loved one.There grief is more important to me than my principles. Have a bit more empathy lads.

    Thanks a bunch for that Xluna. :):)


  • #35
    lmaopml
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,080 ✭✭✭lmaopml


    Antbert wrote: »
    The only time I would ever 'visit' a church is at a funeral or wedding. In this case, the actual mass part is irrelevant to my reason for being there. If someone went to shake my hand I certainly wouldn't refuse them, as that would just be rude. I still wouldn't kneel/sit etc. as the meaning behind it means nothing to me (I'm not trying to be rude about what it means to you) and it isn't my reason for being there.

    I don't think we're actually even arguing... Just clarifying.


    Antbert, your right I'm not arguing at all, and I think it's a great subject to get 'clarity' on because with our more diverse society, it will inevitably lead to more awareness of others too.......I certainly do believe that it is up to the individual....and I guess the 'tutting' is something that both of us on either side of the 'faith' divide will have to live with lol.....People of another 'faith' will 'tut' (inwardly hopefully) because others are kneeling and have private thoughts about it - and the people who are Catholic will 'tut' because others are not kneeling and have private thoughts about it....

    Nothing we can do about that....except perhaps become more aware at funerals and weddings that there may be people of many faiths in attendance...

    ...but yes, your choices make perfect sense to me, and I would respect your choice to sit quietly with no problems whatsoever....I'm just there, as I say, to mind 'myself' and pray and take part 'myself'.....

    Offering your hand or taking part in the more 'human' rather than 'subjecting' elements of the mass would defo get a thumbs up from the congregation in attendance though...as I say, it's all in the delivery.....

    ...same as if I met you in my home...:)


  • #36
    Dades
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,583 Mod ✭✭✭✭Dades


    Xluna wrote: »
    Despite the vile atheist that I am, I would have no problem offering lip service in a religious funeral. They just lost a loved one.There grief is more important to me than my principles. Have a bit more empathy lads.
    I think at this point we need to clarify what people are actually doing at funerals. There are degrees of empathy offered and not-offered.

    (1) Standing/sitting when appropriate
    (2) Kneeling
    (3) Blessing yourself
    (4) Mouthing off prayers.
    (5) Taking communion

    Personally, I feel (1) is compulsory - but enough. The rest aren't obvious enough to be really noticed by someone, unless that someone is out to notice stuff like that. I'll caveat that by suggesting (2) & (3) might be appropriate if you are in the midst of the deceased's family (though as my wife likes to sit near an exit I'm usually down the back!).

    This question isn't whether it's okay to lie on a pew at the back listening to Eels on your iPod and reading The God Delusion, it's whether it's really necessary to completely pretend you are a catholic.


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  • #37
    Antbert
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 649 ✭✭✭Antbert


    Xluna wrote: »
    Despite the vile atheist that I am, I would have no problem offering lip service in a religious funeral. They just lost a loved one.There grief is more important to me than my principles. Have a bit more empathy lads.
    Their grief is probably more important than their principles also.


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