Women and condoms.

23-10-2009 12:29PM

Kiera wrote: »

WTF? Should we all be riding up against walls at the back of nightclubs? :rolleyes:

If you live with the parents, yes. Cos it's impossible to have a good night out without a ride at the end of it.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i · 23-10-2009 12:31PM

syklops wrote: »

Your general Sub-conscious.

Bullsh!t and you know it is. It's taboo and controversial to say it, that's why most of the do gooders in this thread are saying why they say... load of sh!te.

gavredking wrote: »

Very simple, a woman that carries condoms or has them at home just incase should not be viewed as a slut.

A woman who does this is a lot smarter and has more of my respect then the guy who goes out and thinks ah sure whats the worse that can happen or sure i'll just pull out love.

Get a grip its the 21st century, a woman who takes care of her health isnt a slut.

Very true, they should not be, but a lot of the time they are viewed as sluts, this is the point, why are they viewed as sluts?

dotsman wrote: »

Christ, there are a lot of people posting here who have fcuked up views of women. Let me guess, the fact that she slept with you on the first night also makes her a "slut".

For me, a woman carrying a condom is an excellent thing. It means that she takes her sexual health seriously, which is extremely important to me if I am going to sleep with her.

Also very true, but a lot of guys would consider this to be slutty, wtf is with this type of thinking?

AnonoBoy · 23-10-2009 12:31PM

[quote=[Deleted User];62664777]If you live with the parents, yes. Cos it's impossible to have a good night out without a ride at the end of it.[/QUOTE]

handjob?

IvyTheTerrible · 23-10-2009 12:32PM

[quote=[Deleted User];62664648]A lot of people would find it very sad that someone would keep condoms in their room in case they brought someone home randomly. A lot of people would think sleeping with strangers was crazy - condoms don't protect against everything, and who knows what nutcase/bunny boiler you've brought home. But when they say that, they're called prudish and judgemental by the 'casual sex is great' brigade who don't see that they are every bit as judgemental the other way around.[/quote]

I think women carrying their own condoms is great, and I've never had a one night stand or casual sex. Carrying your own condoms is not all about casual sex. People have to open their eyes and see that despite people's best intentions, sexual attraction gets the better of you and isn't it better to be prepared than to do something silly like sex with no condom?

23-10-2009 12:34PM

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Who said they have to be strangers?

It could be the start of that beautiful romance that lasts years with the person you've fancied for ages. You're still going to need condoms.

Well, if you knew something was likely to happen, that's not the same as carrying them 'just in case', which I believe most people here are talking about.

mandysmithers · 23-10-2009 12:34PM

TheZohan wrote: »

So by that rationale if you're riding a bike and you wear a cycle helmet you want to have an accident?

No, of course not! If you're just carrying a condom in your bag/purse, you're not actually using it. But when you're using it, you're using it to prevent any damage being done.

I don't go out carrying a bicycle helmet in case I happen to come across a bike and decide to ride it (puns intended

), but if I knew I was going to be cycling a bike, then yes, I'd bring a cycling helmet with me.

I'm not saying that just because a girl (or guy for that matter) has a condom with them thay they're going to jump on anyone that looks twice, but it means that there's definitely a possibility that they're going to have sex with someone that night if you fancy them etc. etc. By the same token, if you don't have one with you, then it also doesn't mean that you definitely won't - you're either a fool for not taking precautions, you're depending on the other person having one, or you just don't have casual sex.

If you're never going to have a ONS, and I know one girl in particular who has never had one, and definitely never will, you're not going to bring condoms with you.

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 12:38PM

[quote=[Deleted User];62664648]A lot of people would find it very sad that someone would keep condoms in their room in case they brought someone home randomly. A lot of people would think sleeping with strangers was crazy - condoms don't protect against everything, and who knows what nutcase/bunny boiler you've brought home. But when they say that, they're called prudish and judgemental by the 'casual sex is great' brigade who don't see that they are every bit as judgemental the other way around.[/quote]

What in God's name?

Sad that a person keeps condoms in their bedroom --- EH NO!

Sleeping with Strangers is crazy --- depends, but generally NO

Seat Belts and Airbags don't protect against every possible injury --- do we cease all vehicle transport --- NO!

If you come across a Nutcase/Bunny Boiler---- simple bye bye - don't talk to me again

I'm not in this "casual sex bridgade is great" group you're on about. but:
I enjoy sex, I don't sleep around much, but I've no problem having a onenight stand if the mood strikes and I feel like it. I don;t judge or have a problem if someone else does or doesn't either.

I comend anyone male or female who carries protection with them. I go out regularly to clubs and pubs and have a great time and chat to some interesting and great women. I never go out with the intention of "Scoring" and 99 times out of a 100 I go home on my own or with friends. But even so, I carry a condom, just in case.

Condoms are not about being a slut, a brasser, a whore or whatever else you wanna say. Condoms are about preventing preventible diseases.

The attitude that a girl is a slut because she has condoms is an absolute joke and the sort of simple minded mentality that helps raise the rate of STDs and unplanned pregnancies.

I am a guy and I have to say I hate this draconian sexist attitude that its cool for a guy to look after their sexual health and carry a condom but a girl is a slut for doing the same thing. Get in your spaceship and go forward 4 or 5 decades. this is not the 50s and 60s anymore.

Kooli · 23-10-2009 12:44PM

I think it's hard to argue that a girl who carried condoms around is a girl who is interested in/open to one night stands. Otherwise known as casual sex. Perhaps everyone is agreeing with this point? But then differ on the next step which is calling these women sluts? If the question was whether men see women who carry condoms as women who are interested in or open to casual sex, then it's hard to see why they wouldn't.

Having them in your house is a different thing. Now that's just common sense.

stovelid · 23-10-2009 12:45PM

snyper wrote: »

Simple solution to those nagging problem.

Be the best ride she ever had.

Or at least aim to get into the top 40?

23-10-2009 12:46PM

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

What in God's name?

Sigh. I'm making the point that there is a very valid counterargument here. Not saying it's what I think.

Sad that a person keeps condoms in their bedroom --- EH NO!

Sleeping with Strangers is crazy --- depends, but generally NO

That's your opinion. A person is hardly stupid for not wanting to do it.

Seat Belts and Airbags don't protect against every possible injury --- do we cease all vehicle transport --- NO!

That's a silly comparison. Unless you can walk everywhere, you have to travel by car or bus. You don't have to have sex with randomers. It's not necessary in any way, shape or form. I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying it's silly to assume it's something everyone does. Plenty of people don't.

If you come across a Nutcase/Bunny Boiler---- simple bye bye - don't talk to me again

If it's not already too late

I'm not in this "casual sex bridgade is great" group you're on about. but:
I enjoy sex, I don't sleep around much, but I've no problem having a onenight stand if the mood strikes and I feel like it. I don;t judge or have a problem if someone else does or doesn't either.

I comend anyone male or female who carries protection with them. I go out regularly to clubs and pubs and have a great time and chat to some interesting and great women. I never go out with the intention of "Scoring" and 99 times out of a 100 I go home on my own or with friends. But even so, I carry a condom, just in case.

Condoms are not about being a slut, a brasser, a whore or whatever else you wanna say. Condoms are about preventing preventible diseases.

The attitude that a girl is a slut because she has condoms is an absolute joke and the sort of simple minded mentality that helps raise the rate of STDs and unplanned pregnancies.

I am a guy and I have to say I hate this draconian sexist attitude that its cool for a guy to look after their sexual health and carry a condom but a girl is a slut for doing the same thing. Get in your spaceship and go forward 4 or 5 decades. this is not the 50s and 60s anymore.

I don't disagree with you. I'm pointing out that there are reasons some girls don't carry condoms, it doesn't make them irresponsible.

dr.bollocko · 23-10-2009 12:51PM

Long onion banned.

cocoa · 23-10-2009 12:58PM

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

I comend anyone male or female who carries protection with them. I go out regularly to clubs and pubs and have a great time and chat to some interesting and great women. I never go out with the intention of "Scoring" and 99 times out of a 100 I go home on my own or with friends. But even so, I carry a condom, just in case.

But 1 time out of 100, you use it. You have a genuine intention to use it if the case arises. Which is fine, but some people have no intention of letting that case arise. Don't you think it would be odd to carry protection for something you have no intention whatsoever of doing?

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

Condoms are not about being a slut, a brasser, a whore or whatever else you wanna say. Condoms are about preventing preventible diseases.

I'm not aware of anyone claiming otherwise...

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

The attitude that a girl is a slut because she has condoms is an absolute joke and the sort of simple minded mentality that helps raise the rate of STDs and unplanned pregnancies.

But a girl is someone who considers the possibility of sex with someone she may not know a possibility, a possibility that she would entertain and is prepared for. I wouldn't consider that kind of person a slut, but to say we can't glean any information about their intentions or attitudes to ONS etc. is ludicrous...

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 01:01PM

[quote=[Deleted User];62665036]Sigh. I'm making the point that there is a very valid counterargument here. Not saying it's what I think.

That's your opinion. A person is hardly stupid for not wanting to do it.

I don't recall anyone saying a person is stupid if they don't want to. I certainly didn't. Each person to their own but it's not sad to keep condoms in your room COLOR=red]responsible is a far better adjective[/COLOR and it's not crazy to want to sleep with someone you are sexually attracted to.

That's a silly comparison. Unless you can walk everywhere, you have to travel by car or bus. You don't have to have sex with randomers. It's not necessary in any way, shape or form. I'm not saying it's wrong, I'm saying it's silly to assume it's something everyone does. Plenty of people don't.

To be honest, in most civilisations, sexual need is seen as a natural instinct for all (or maybe just most?) animals (including humans). Vehicular transport is not. Again, not saying everyone does or doesn't. but my point is there is nothing wrong with doing it and you shouldn't be branded a slut for doing so

If it's not already too late

Then you won't need to be worried about being called a slut

I don't disagree with you. I'm pointing out that there are reasons some girls don't carry condoms, it doesn't make them irresponsible.[/quote]

The point of my post was not to attack does who don't "sleep around" - I honestly don't think there was anything in my post to suggest that.

My post relates entirely to the simple minded in society who preach to and put down those who enjoy sexual freedom, while at the same time do their utmost to be responsible and protect themselves.

My posts refer to the OP and the discussion, that I hope the OP was trying to formulate.

Bottom line is, girls should be able to carry a condom without social stigma, the same way the vast majority of guys are able to do so. STIs are very preventible and God knows we don't need Catholic style views on condoms etc...to affect people's sexual choices.

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 01:04PM

cocoa wrote: »

But 1 time out of 100, you use it. You have a genuine intention to use it if the case arises. Which is fine, but some people have no intention of letting that case arise. Don't you think it would be odd to carry protection for something you have no intention whatsoever of doing?

I have absolutely no idea where this paragraph is coming from? Where on earth did I say that every girl has the intention of having sex after a night out etc... and where did I say that every girl (or guy) should automatically carry condoms?

I simply said we shouldn't judge those that do as being a slut!

I'm not aware of anyone claiming otherwise...

But a girl is someone who considers the possibility of sex with someone she may not know a possibility, a possibility that she would entertain and is prepared for. I wouldn't consider that kind of person a slut, but to say we can't glean any information about their intentions or attitudes to ONS etc. is ludicrous...
What?

??

AckwelFoley · 23-10-2009 01:10PM

stovelid wrote: »

Or at least aim to get into the top 40?

can you imagine, you going hammer and tongs at it for 2 hours, your bell end is almost worn and in need of replacment, your tongue tastes like a you just chowed into a platter of sea food that was discarded at the back of a chinese resturant, you thinking you just got a new high score - you're almost expecting a high five off her, and she turns around, kisses you and says, defo top 10 performance there..

:eek:

cocoa · 23-10-2009 01:12PM

@I_am_Jebus

please don't put text of your own inside quote tags. It's confusing and it makes it harder for me to respond...

I'm not saying women or men who carry condoms are sluts or any other insult you care to use, simply that they are aware of the possibility of a ONS etc and they would have one if all other factors were fine (i.e., the guy/girl was nice / hot and they were in the right mood etc etc...)

Women and men who don't carry condoms, broadly, fall into the category of stupid, or no intention whatsoever to have a ONS, even if it presents itself.

I'm not calling the condom carriers names. Condoms are about preventing preventable diseases, but that's not all we're talking about, we're talking about carrying them... I think it does say / show something about someone. I don't think it's a bad thing though...

scanlas · 23-10-2009 01:39PM

There are two main types of women:

Those that have sex purely for their own enjoyment and expect nothing in return and those who trade something for sex.

The first type are known as sluts.

There are two types who use sex as a commodity, the high status and the low status. The low status ones are called prostitutes, they require money in return. The high status ones are known as wives, they require a lifetime of support and commitment. They often secure their investment by making the man wait before having sex to prove he will honour his part of the trade.

Many wives will condemn and criticise "sluts" with rhetoric such as "she doesn't respect herself", but the reality is she views "sluts" as a threat to her investment, if all women have sex for free it makes her commodity of exclusive access to her sexually decrease in value and she knows it. Sluts are a threat to the market price for sex, that being a lifetime of support and commitment. The scarcity of sex allows her to control her husband . Why do you think so many men let their wives boss them around?

Men tend to criticise sluts because it messes with their beliefs. They really want to believe that their wife/girlfriend only wants them sexually. Any evidence that women could like a variety of sex with different men makes them insecure. Little do they know they are playing into the power dynamic which allows the average wife to boss around the average husband. The more "sluts" there are the less power wives/girlfriends have over their hubands/boyfriens. Obvously there are exceptions to this, I'm describing trends.

So my message to women is carry condoms if you want to? Don't be bullied by other people's agendas.

Pygmalion · 23-10-2009 02:01PM

TheZohan wrote: »

Everyone has sex

Wrong

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 02:36PM

cocoa wrote: »

@I_am_Jebus

please don't put text of your own inside quote tags. It's confusing and it makes it harder for me to respond...

Sorry:o

I'm not saying women or men who carry condoms are sluts or any other insult you care to use, simply that they are aware of the possibility of a ONS etc and they would have one if all other factors were fine (i.e., the guy/girl was nice / hot and they were in the right mood etc etc...)

Good. That's what my post was saying. That people shouldn't affix a label like "slut" to a girl who is being responsible

Women and men who don't carry condoms, broadly, fall into the category of stupid, or no intention whatsoever to have a ONS, even if it presents itself.

maybe even a third... does who had no intention of a ONS but somehow ended up in that position... (Sometimes due to outside influences such as drink or drugs [of course maybe those type would fall into the stupid cartegory]):)

I'm not calling the condom carriers names. Condoms are about preventing preventable diseases, but that's not all we're talking about, we're talking about carrying them... I think it does say / show something about someone. I don't think it's a bad thing though...

Meh, I think it show's they're being responsible. As I said, guys don't get the same level of Flack (if any) that girls do for carrying condoms with them. That is hypocritical and simple minded in my opinion and doesn't help the fight against the transmission of STIs.

All in all though, and I am not trying to be smart but I don't understand your reply to my original post. You say you don't call (consider?) these women sluts. Which was the discussion topic in the OP. My post was about why they shouldn't be considered sluts and why responsibility should be comended.

I didn't throw to the other side of the coin (i.e. that people that don't want a ONS are idiots, prudish etc... etc... Therefore, I am not sure why you decided to respond to my post in the manner you did (or at all really).

Turd Ferguson · 23-10-2009 02:44PM

My ex used to have a pack of condoms in her drawer by the bed. I never thought much about it really, although when we broke up I did take a stapler and punch some holes in them. I dont think she realised cos I met her a few weeks later at the airport (she was off to England for the day) and she never said anything

cocoa · 23-10-2009 02:50PM

hah, I don't think I was really as clear as I should've been in my first post, I'll try and fix that...

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

Good. That's what my post was saying. That people shouldn't affix a label like "slut" to a girl who is being responsible

Using condoms is responsible and does not require any further discussion. Carrying condoms is a bit more. I feel it means that person would go on a ONS. Which is fine, but you can surely understand that others would have a problem with it or consider a poor decision?

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

maybe even a third... does who had no intention of a ONS but somehow ended up in that position... (Sometimes due to outside influences such as drink or drugs [of course maybe those type would fall into the stupid cartegory]):)

Hah, I agree. You could put them in with the stupid, but it's probably fairer to give them their own group

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

Meh, I think it show's they're being responsible. As I said, guys don't get the same level of Flack (if any) that girls do for carrying condoms with them. That is hypocritical and simple minded in my opinion and doesn't help the fight against the transmission of STIs.

I agree and personally I'd view both guys and girls who carry them the same way (which is not a bad way!

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

All in all though, and I am not trying to be smart but I don't understand your reply to my original post. You say you don't call (consider?) these women sluts. Which was the discussion topic in the OP. My post was about why they shouldn't be considered sluts and why responsibility should be comended.

Certainly, if you have no problem with the idea of a ONS, which is a separate issue but suffice it to say that some people do have a problem and go so far as having a problem with others doing it.

I_am_Jebus wrote: »

I didn't throw to the other side of the coin (i.e. that people that don't want a ONS are idiots, prudish etc... etc... Therefore, I am not sure why you decided to respond to my post in the manner you did (or at all really).

I felt you over simplified. This is not just a thread about condom use in general. It does say something about a person that they carry one, and some people would make a judgement based on this. It's really not such an unfathomable thought process, even if it is unfair.

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 02:56PM

cocoa wrote: »

hah, I don't think I was really as clear as I should've been in my first post, I'll try and fix that...

Using condoms is responsible and does not require any further discussion. Carrying condoms is a bit more. I feel it means that person would go on a ONS. Which is fine, but you can surely understand that others would have a problem with it or consider a poor decision?

Hah, I agree. You could put them in with the stupid, but it's probably fairer to give them their own group

I agree and personally I'd view both guys and girls who carry them the same way (which is not a bad way!

Certainly, if you have no problem with the idea of a ONS, which is a separate issue but suffice it to say that some people do have a problem and go so far as having a problem with others doing it.

I felt you over simplified. This is not just a thread about condom use in general. It does say something about a person that they carry one, and some people would make a judgement based on this. It's really not such an unfathomable thought process, even if it is unfair.

Hey, it's cool.

We're more or less singing from the one hymn sheet.

I completely agree with you that a certain viewpoint/judgement exists out there towards those people who carry condoms regularly (both male and female). But I do think that that view is much more negatively prevalent towards women than it is to men (in general and in my experience).

I don't believe that that viewpoint is fair in the modern world but as you say (not literally) so be it. I'll just have to try fight the good fight

anywho this is After Hours, so....:
All women are slutty whores. but they're great when they cum into my bedroom.

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 02:57PM

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

My ex used to have a pack of condoms in her drawer by the bed. I never thought much about it really, although when we broke up I did take a stapler and punch some holes in them. I dont think she realised cos I met her a few weeks later at the airport (she was off to England for the day) and she never said anything

LEGEND!

mandysmithers · 23-10-2009 03:11PM

scanlas wrote: »

There are two main types of women:

Those that have sex purely for their own enjoyment and expect nothing in return and those who trade something for sex.

The first type are known as sluts.

There are two types who use sex as a commodity, the high status and the low status. The low status ones are called prostitutes, they require money in return. The high status ones are known as wives, they require a lifetime of support and commitment. They often secure their investment by making the man wait before having sex to prove he will honour his part of the trade.

Many wives will condemn and criticise "sluts" with rhetoric such as "she doesn't respect herself", but the reality is she views "sluts" as a threat to her investment, if all women have sex for free it makes her commodity of exclusive access to her sexually decrease in value and she knows it. Sluts are a threat to the market price for sex, that being a lifetime of support and commitment. The scarcity of sex allows her to control her husband . Why do you think so many men let their wives boss them around?

Men tend to criticise sluts because it messes with their beliefs. They really want to believe that their wife/girlfriend only wants them sexually. Any evidence that women could like a variety of sex with different men makes them insecure. Little do they know they are playing into the power dynamic which allows the average wife to boss around the average husband. The more "sluts" there are the less power wives/girlfriends have over their hubands/boyfriens. Obvously there are exceptions to this, I'm describing trends.

So my message to women is carry condoms if you want to? Don't be bullied by other people's agendas.

Jesus H. Christ. :rolleyes:

There are also women who are wives AND enjoy sex, without expecting anything in return. Why am I even bothering to reply to that post....

I've read that post somewhere on here before, nice bit of copying and pasting there.

I_am_Jebus · 23-10-2009 03:16PM

mandysmithers wrote: »

Jesus H. Christ. :rolleyes:

There are also women who are wives AND enjoy sex with men other than their husbands, without expecting anything in return. Why am I even bothering to reply to that post....

I've read that post somewhere on here before, nice bit of copying and pasting there.

FYP...

Joking...

Put down the axe

WeWillBeReborn · 23-10-2009 03:42PM

I keep a packet of condom in my bedroom at all times.

You never know...

Michellenman · 23-10-2009 03:46PM

Yeah I generally have one or two in my purse and I've a few packs in my room. I don't sleep around and I've never had a ONS but they're just handy to have on me should an ocassion where they're needed arise, whether it's for me or a friend.

What do I rate on the slut scale now?

4zn76tysfajdxp · 23-10-2009 03:48PM

cocoa wrote: »

@I_am_Jebus

please don't put text of your own inside quote tags. It's confusing and it makes it harder for me to respond...

@cocoa

Please don't backseat mod. If you have an issue with a post, report it or PM a mod.

caseyann · 23-10-2009 04:23PM

This should solve all problems:D

http://selnadeem.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/lock-vagina.jpg

SV · 23-10-2009 04:31PM

Salma Big Skater wrote: »

@cocoa

Please don't backseat mod. If you have an issue with a post, report it or PM a mod.

You can't be serious..

Women and condoms.

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