Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Issues With Controlling Father

2»

Comments

  • #32
    Permabear
    Closed Accounts Posts: 39,019 ✭✭✭✭Permabear


    This post has been deleted.


  • #33
    Mulan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 240 ✭✭Mulan


    Hi OP, don't forget about your sister. She's next up to the plate and it could end up worse for her.


  • #34
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi OP,

    I was in a similar situation and due to no family or finances, i could not get myself into college after school like i had hoped,

    I did however work and so some pre courses till i was 23 and then i got into third level college as a mature student, at this time you are classed as independent from your parents and there is a very good grant and rent relief and btea allowance available, well there was 3 years ago!

    Sounds like your been driven to grow up and be independent quite fast, sorry to hear that your family are being so unsupportive of you, your education will be your ticket to freedom,

    If you can get out of that house and away from your dad do because when someone is manipulating you it can have very bad effects on you emotionally. Be prepared to be challenged by many family members laying down the guilt but do not succumb, stay strong for yourself, its your life and you are in the driving seat of it! G'luck.


  • #35
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Mulan wrote: »
    Hi OP, don't forget about your sister. She's next up to the plate and it could end up worse for her.

    Doubt she could ever forget about her sister, but now is a time for her to be selfish, if her sister needs assistance in the future the OP can monitor the situation but OP be selfish and get away for you right now, dont let any guilt sway you.


  • #36
    CDfm
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,649 ✭✭✭✭CDfm


    Mulan wrote: »
    Hi OP, don't forget about your sister. She's next up to the plate and it could end up worse for her.

    In fairness OP - you really need to look after yourself first and there is a lot of sound advice here.

    There are a lot of good people out there but its hard to look at the options when you are being bullied and you are not the first person who has needed to deal with it - its a big step that you are taking.Best of Luck.


  • Advertisement
  • #37
    Leitrim lass
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 73 ✭✭Leitrim lass


    I'd completely agree with Moo moo1 on this. You may still need his cooperation with certain things. Try to leave on a good note and act as if you are doing this out of respect for your parents.


  • #38
    tinkerbell
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,423 ✭✭✭tinkerbell


    I think you've made the right decision to move out. Your father sounds like a complete controlling maniac. That's crazy trying to get you to pay him €100 a week just for a tiny car journey and then expecting you to give him even more, what the hell does he think this is? You're trying to save for college like!

    If you can't move out, either do as the others suggest - walk home from work, get a bicycle (if cost is an issue, ask if you can borrow a friend's bike) or if a friend has a car, ask them if they will give you a lift now and again and offer to give them a few euro to pay for petrol. Do not give a penny to your father, he is being completely psycho by trying to ruin everything for you. Also, I wouldn't defer college either. The sooner you get to college and get qualified or whatever, the sooner that you are completely free from his grasp. Plus if you defer college, like you said already he would love that because then he could lecture you on the issue.

    Good luck. At least you can get out. Your mother is stuck there until she can stand up for herself. Hopefully your sister won't have the same problems that you had with your father.


  • #39
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hi Op, Just wanted to wish you good luck with geting out of there and with getting into college asap. I think that your circumstances in relation to getting the student grant are exceptional and you may qualify if you state your case. I would speak to a local TD to represent you as it seems you have a very genuine case. You sound like a very clever person who values a good education. I have no doubt that you will overcome any obstacles he puts in your way so be positive but please remove yourself from such a controlling environment. Best of Luck, Let us know how you get on,


  • #40
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,006 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Unregistered wrote: »
    Hi Op, Just wanted to wish you good luck with geting out of there and with getting into college asap. I think that your circumstances in relation to getting the student grant are exceptional and you may qualify if you state your case. I would speak to a local TD to represent you as it seems you have a very genuine case. You sound like a very clever person who values a good education. I have no doubt that you will overcome any obstacles he puts in your way so be positive but please remove yourself from such a controlling environment. Best of Luck, Let us know how you get on,

    Hi i hope you will be entitled to the grant, but they may take into account that your parents are still responsible for you, im not 100% but they will want your parents info unless you can demonstrate you are not under their guardianship.


Advertisement