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First Church of Cybertron

  • 27-09-2006 1:17pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭


    Energon be within you.


    On this the holy day of Wednsday we shall have a reading of the book of Cybertron Chapter 1 Verse 1
    1. Low and Behold did the Quintessons beings of tentacles and with good in their heart formed life from metal and flesh. Thus Trans-organics roamed freely and populated. But they were primitive and unrurly, causing destruction and violence.
    2. The Quintessons fearing for their safety sealed the Trans-Organics away and begun anew. This time the flesh was done away with and the metal was brought to life. Thus the all mighty Spark, Vector Sigma was born and with it Cybertron.


    This has been a reading from the book of Cybertron.

    Til All Are One!

    Transformers...Roll out.


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭DarthWraak


    Amen to that BlitzKrieg


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    In Primus we trust.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,480 ✭✭✭projectmayhem


    Amen.

    :)


  • Posts: 0 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Spark be with you :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,367 ✭✭✭Agamemnon


    Blasphemy! Thou art worshipping false gods!
    The Transformer race were created by the Lord Primus as a last line of defence against his ancient enemy Unicron, cursed be his name. If ye will know the holy Truth, read ye from the Gospel of Furman, issue 150 of the Marvel UK comic, now probably collected as "The Legacy Of Unicron" and available in all good bookshops.
    Put not thy soul in mortal peril by listening to the sacriligeous lies and shaky plotting of the cartoon series. Heretics!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,997 ✭✭✭jaggeh


    ladies and gentlebots we have our first schism!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    agamemnon wrote:
    Blasphemy! Thou art worshipping false gods!
    The Transformer race were created by the Lord Primus as a last line of defence against his ancient enemy Unicron, cursed be his name. If ye will know the holy Truth, read ye from the Gospel of Furman, issue 150 of the Marvel UK comic, now probably collected as "The Legacy Of Unicron" and available in all good bookshops.
    Put not thy soul in mortal peril by listening to the sacriligeous lies and shaky plotting of the cartoon series. Heretics!

    You UNHOLY BASTERD CHILD OF THE CHURCH. There is only one church of cybertron, the original church founded by the rock of cybertron Alpha Trion as delivered by the prophet Sunbow.

    Your heritec sect derived from our bosum shall be cast out and excommunicated!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,480 ✭✭✭projectmayhem


    hang on, in the FAQ i put "in primus we trust", have i sided to some sect/cult within the church of cybertron?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    There is the original church of cybertron, which is the church of generation 1 and all its related siblings. Then there is the heritic offshoot the marvel infection that is agamman's filthy cult.

    Be true to your spark and follow the one true Prime.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭DarthWraak


    I shall follow the true light ( G1 on the telly ;) ) no matter what! Heresy is upon us! Strike down the evil doers!


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,367 ✭✭✭Agamemnon


    BlitzKrieg wrote:
    You UNHOLY BASTERD CHILD OF THE CHURCH. There is only one church of cybertron, the original church founded by the rock of cybertron Alpha Trion as delivered by the prophet Sunbow.

    Your heritec sect derived from our bosum shall be cast out and excommunicated!

    Your vile blasphemies hurt our Lord Primus and make baby Optimus cry. But Primus stll loves you, BlitzKrieg, he loves you and forgives you and waits for the day when you return to his arms like the lost shepherd. Although personally I hope he has you crucified and he casts you into a lake of fire where the Sharkticons will gnaw on your testes for all eternity.

    Heed ye the Gospel of Furman, as spread by our blessed brother constitutionus in this good and wholesome post.
    I'll pray for you, BlitzKrieg.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,480 ✭✭✭projectmayhem


    in honour of the holy day i have decided to take our divine inspiration and watch an episode from my g1 boxset, from start to finish. it will take quite some time to get through 4 seasons, but when i do, i will begin reading one comic every holy wednesday.

    you should all join me in my feast.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,836 ✭✭✭Vokes


    Weird, ive just started watching watching G1 Season 2 dvd today. 1 season per week me hopes.

    'Til All Are One!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭DarthWraak


    Let us embrace this knowledge on hand, so we may gain the powers of the matrix, and hence, cast aside all heretics


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,480 ✭✭✭projectmayhem


    i notice there was no sermon given yesterday... bad form. i hope there hasn't been the creation of a new cult or sect within the religion here...


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,367 ✭✭✭Agamemnon


    Our Lord Primus has struck down upon the false Christ BlitzKrieg with great vengeance and furious anger. And yea, there was much weeping and gnashing of teeth.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    There is no sermon on the first wednsday of each month because on that day all followers of the Church of Cybertron are struck dumb by the the great wave of sadness in remembering that moment.

    Light Our darkest hour


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,216 ✭✭✭✭monkeyfudge


    But we can rejoice on Saturday, right?
    carrally.jpg


  • Posts: 0 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Todays Prayer :D
    Our Primus, Who art in Cybertron
    Hallowed be Thy Spark;
    Thy kingdom come,
    Thy will be done,
    on Cybertron as it is in the Matrix.
    Give us this day our Energon Cube,
    and forgive us our trespasses,
    as we forgive those who trespass against us;
    and lead us not into Decepticontation,
    but deliver us from Megatron. Roll Out.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    Energon be within you


    Today we take a reading from the book of Optimus

    Chapter 3 verse 1
    Thus Orion Pax, decieved by Megatron, the Deceptacon he admired, was struck down and left for his spark to burn away into the night. But time was with the young Pax as the angelic Aerialbots through time and space rescued the dying autobot and took him to the old and wise Alpha Trion, who took Orion and resurected him. Orion was returned to life, but he was not returned as the same Autobot, reformatted into an Autobot of leadership and courage he became Optimus Prime the first leader of the autobot, thus it was the autobots were able to fight in coming civil war.

    This has been a reading from the book of Optimus

    Till all are one

    Trnasformers...Roll out.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭DarthWraak


    Amen. May our fellow Autobots seek the light of the matrix!


    Till next Wednesday!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    Energon be within you

    Today a reading from the book of Primacron chapter 3 verse 1
    Thus the planet eater unicron was released on to the universe, capable of wiping it clean for its reconstruction in Primacron's image. But Unicron had grown greedy for more then the taste of planets and seeked his own destiny and power. Unicron wounded his master and disapeared into the cosmos, leaving Primacron to lament his wounds and his mistakes. Lament them he did, he cursed creations of metal and intelligence and turned to the creation of energy, the energy that would be Tornedron

    This has been a reading from the book of Primacron

    Till all are one

    Transformers...Roll out.


    If any of this contigration would like to teach the word of Cybertron please talk to your local Clergy (myself) about applying to the order.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,480 ✭✭✭projectmayhem


    BlitzKrieg wrote:
    If any of this contigration would like to teach the word of Cybertron please talk to your local Clergy (myself) about applying to the order.

    fuppin fantastic sig tbh :D

    amen.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭DarthWraak


    Another great readout from the only religion that matters :)

    However I am appalled at the turn out here on this very night!!!

    Have our congregation turned to the blasphemous teachings of these new cults??!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,216 ✭✭✭✭monkeyfudge


    Where does Primus fit into the grander scheme of things again?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    Primus exists in the book of beast, the book of Optimus and the Book of Cybertron.


    While the misguided churches of marvel have compacted the 380 books of Cybertron into the 4 books of

    Primus
    Autobot
    Deceptacon
    Cybertron

    We of the church of cybertron feel that this careless disrespect for doctrine denies followers many doctrines by which to live to the fullest of their faith.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    Energon be within you.

    Before I get to today's sermon I would like to talk to you, our close and happy community about community. it fills one with pride when I see that for such a young forum we have already exceeded 3 pages in length, this clearly shows many of you have an interest in your faith, which establishment of this faith I do not know, but I hope you think deep and hard about you're faith before pursuing it further.

    But I must inform you that there are certain aspects of all fiaths that appear unseemly, Christianity has its crusades, Islam its Jihads, and we here at the Church of Cybertron suffer the pain that is the book of hasbro.

    The book of Hasbro is debatable entry into the doctrine of all faiths of cybertron, including both the dreamweave and Marvel teachings. It is a book that encourages the notion that a follower may 'buy' his spark, that material wealth may be exchanged for his transformation, for his right to Cybertron and his loyalty to both Decaptacon and Autobot. Now I tell you, wether you read the book of Hasbro or not,understand here right now that we of the Church of Cybertron believe Sparks are for those that deserver and no material worth of 'merchandise' can change that, he who owns only 1 'merchandise' can have a spark brighter then he who owns a 100. I will not have followers cast out because they would not buy into 'Star Wars' Transformers, George Lucas is not of our faith he has no price on you're spark. Those of you who do buy these 'Star Wars' Transformers know that as much joy and happiness that they may bring you in you're current form they will not bring you any closer to the source. Now to our reading


    Today we take a reading from the book of Beast chapter 1, verse 1.
    Thus it came in the distant future of Cybertron the descendents of the Autobots and the Deceptacons were reformatted as Maximals and Predacons, their fruitless wars continued and it was during one such war that the Predacons using their secret police agent Tarantulas stole the Covenant of Primus from its place in the bowels of Cybertron.Under a new Megatron and armed with a transwarp drive and the Golden Disc the Predacons escaped into the past. They were pursued by a small band of Maximal scientists.

    This has been a reading from the book of Beast.


    Till all are one

    Transformers...Roll out!

    We are still looking for new young preachers to spread the word, if you would like to join please contact your local clergy


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 954 ✭✭✭DarthWraak


    BlitzKrieg wrote:
    We are still looking for new young preachers to spread the word, if you would like to join please contact your local clergy

    I am ready to preach the true word to the unfaithfuls who read the book of Hasbro. It should be known that Star Wars and Transformers do not co-exist!

    Till next Wednesday! Till all are one!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,698 ✭✭✭✭BlitzKrieg


    As per our faith, there will be no sermon tonight, as we must remember.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,511 ✭✭✭Rozie


    Technically, the comic came first. the cartoon was treated as a "Marvel Cartoon". The comic is where the names, designs and personalities came from pretty much. They took the toys and gave them life; sparks.

    I don't think Quintessons and Primus have to contradict; Primus could have curled into into a planet, which the Quintessons built their factory on. This would make sense, as Primus probably couldn't just spurt up Technology out of nowhere, and Quintessons needed a planet to build their factory on, in and around. Not sure how Primus would have aided in the creation of Transformer life, but that could explain how beings intended as drones by the Quintessons became sentient.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    In one of the Transformers Universe (Botcon exclusive) comics it explains how the Quintessons came to Cybertron and harnessed the power of the dormant Primus to create the Transformers race. So according to that logic, both accounts are correct.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 412 ✭✭GWolf


    Ah but, seperate continuities and all that, sine I'm fairly cetain Primal never met Rodimus.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 147 ✭✭Dominatorx


    GWolf wrote:
    Ah but, seperate continuities and all that, sine I'm fairly cetain Primal never met Rodimus.

    Not rodimus but he did meet optimus on two seperate occasions (even though one of em was a fake)
    Beast wars is the continuation of the g1 universe allbeit centuries into the future so rodimus would in fact b primals ancestor


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 412 ✭✭GWolf


    Dominatorx wrote:
    Not rodimus but he did meet optimus on two seperate occasions (even though one of em was a fake)
    Beast wars is the continuation of the g1 universe allbeit centuries into the future so rodimus would in fact b primals ancestor

    Rodimus isn't related to Primal. They meet in Universe(seperate continuity)but they aren't related. Also, technically he never really met Prime either. I mean, Prime flickered to life for five seconds, not like they ha da conversation or anything.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 147 ✭✭Dominatorx


    GWolf wrote:
    Rodimus isn't related to Primal. They meet in Universe(seperate continuity)but they aren't related. Also, technically he never really met Prime either. I mean, Prime flickered to life for five seconds, not like they ha da conversation or anything.

    Beast machines primal and prime had a chat (till it turned out it was actually megatron but it was revealed that primal was decended from prime)
    And whod want to b releated to rodimus anyway :D


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 412 ✭✭GWolf


    Dominatorx wrote:
    Beast machines primal and prime had a chat (till it turned out it was actually megatron but it was revealed that primal was decended from prime)
    And whod want to b releated to rodimus anyway :D

    I like Roddy. He's kinda like a pouppy that wets the carpet. Annoying but cute.

    Primal descended from Prime, that was so stupid. I even thought it was stupid way back when I first saw BM. Hate that show. BW best TF ever. BM just above BWNeo and Energon for the worst.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 296 ✭✭Thundercracker


    Is there a church of followers of the Decepticons?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 85,049 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    The Biki says these sermons happen often.

    It lied.


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