Your most embarrassing school moment

About a week or two before my leaving cert began, we had this big "Graduation mass" where we recieved copies of the school photo. Present was everyone in my year (150+) and most of the teachers and staff. One lad was a decent singer and brought a guitar so we listened to him sing some mawkish pop tunes after the mass while some of the more emotional idiots cried.

The weekend before this event I was at a girl's birthday party in some pub. It was karaoke night. I sang Yesterday by The Beatles becuase I was drunk and feeling class clownish. I must put emphasis on the fact that I can't sing at all, that was pretty much part of the joke of me going up and singing. A jolly good laugh was had by all.

Anyway, at the graduation, the minstrel runs out of his merry tunes and asks for some requests. As a joke, somebody yells out my name. Someone else joins in. And another. Pretty soon everyone in my year and most of the teachers are chanting my name and stamping their feet like gorillas. I have no choice, I have to sing.

Moments after opening my mouth it dawns on everyone fairly soon that I'm completely tone deaf and I don't even know the words of the fucking song. The smiles fade and are replaced by by pitying stares. The man with the guitar stops playing. Three verses into my made up lyrics I bow and move back to where I was sitting. Applause is muted and polite. Guitar man continues playing and I feel myself drowning in embarassment.

God, I hated that fucking school.

Pretty much all the time between first and third year. Terenure College, it's a load of me hole.

On the plus side, I am in the Guiness book of records for longest lasting erection.

Zangetsu wrote: »

^ You not supposed to let them at your hole,,,

I was weak and underdeveloped.

Mackenzie Thundering Diesel wrote: »

About a week or two before my leaving cert began, we had this big "Graduation mass" where we recieved copies of the school photo. Present was everyone in my year (150+) and most of the teachers and staff. One lad was a decent singer and brought a guitar so we listened to him sing some mawkish pop tunes after the mass while some of the more emotional idiots cried.

The weekend before this event I was at a girl's birthday party in some pub. It was karaoke night. I sang Yesterday by The Beatles becuase I was drunk and feeling class clownish. I must put emphasis on the fact that I can't sing at all, that was pretty much part of the joke of me going up and singing. A jolly good laugh was had by all.

Anyway, at the graduation, the minstrel runs out of his merry tunes and asks for some requests. As a joke, somebody yells out my name. Someone else joins in. And another. Pretty soon everyone in my year and most of the teachers are chanting my name and stamping their feet like gorillas. I have no choice, I have to sing.

Moments after opening my mouth it dawns on everyone fairly soon that I'm completely tone deaf and I don't even know the words of the fucking song. The smiles fade and are replaced by by pitying stares. The man with the guitar stops playing. Three verses into my made up lyrics I bow and move back to where I was sitting. Applause is muted and polite. Guitar man continues playing and I feel myself drowning in embarassment.

God, I hated that fucking school.

Hahahahahaha! I would have paid to see that. You know you're going to be remembered for the rest of your life for that. In fact I bet right now someones telling someone that story right now.

Someone rapped at the graduation year below me, I was there because of my best friend and this complete randomer (never noticed him but then my school had 1,200 students) got up and rapped. He did a good job, had alot of nerve but still it was the most random thing I've ever seen.

Oh I guess I better tell you mine, embarassment was a daily occurence for me. For instance, once in a corridor coming in from lunch somebody had an american football. They were bouncing it off the walls and watching it go off in different directions hitting into students.

The ball hit me in the face, and me being extremely awkward and clumsy tried to catch it and throw it back but I smacked it and it went flying into a girl.

The girl got really annoyed and was like FFS. I walked alongside her I kept apologising as awkward people do saying "IM SO SORRY". My head was turned in her direction so I wasnt looking where I was going.

My school had these big fire hoses all along the corridors. They stuck out and had a metal case covering them. Long story short, I was like "IM SO SORRY IT WAS AN ACCIDENT" and then next thing BAM! I walk into the hose and fall onto the ground. The ball got thrown at me a few more times as everyone laughed. I was in a complete daze.

2nd Story; What I remember:
In my 3rd year I fell off my bike flat onto the road right outside the school gates. I couldn't see anything except this brown fuzz in my eyes. I went into the locker room got sick in a bin (yeah something was wrong with me but I was obsessed with having perfect attendance so stayed in).

All I could see was brown fuzz except for a little patch of clearness, my head was pounding. So I go into my homeroom class and the teacher says "So did you fall off your bike?" I said no and everyone starts laughing. I was taken to reception and driven to the GP (where I was told to wear a helmet and that I was fine, even though in hindsight I don't think I was).

2nd Story; What actually happend.
What actually happened is quite bizarre. I was actually taken to reception after my fall by a classmate and the lollipop lady. I do NOT remember this. At reception I gave the classmate a random phone number then wandered off to my locker while he was getting one of the receptionists to ring home. I then puked on the floor and told people "imfineimalright" in a real slurry way. The classmate rushed to the homeroom to get help from our teacher and when I arrived in the teacher asked me with geniune concern if i had fallen and was I hurt. And my response to him was so odd that the class started laughing (I said "no sirrrrr hahahhaaaa").

3rd story; sorry guys;
I'm actually afraid someone from my school will know who I am by these stories. Basically I did one of those supervisor attendant job. And one of the supervisors for the 3rd years was really old and really fat. His face would turn red and he would breathe really loudly in random spouts. He used to make yapping noises constantly and take his teeth out. He was really strange, and really angry.

During the CSPE exam where everyone left early, a group of 3rd years stayed indoors right beside the exam hall because there was torrential rain outside. They were making loads of noise so the angry fat man came out and shouted at them (and me). They still didnt move. A teacher came down and brought them to a classroom.

However, there was a bunch of people who still waited around. When it was time for the angry fat man's tea and biscuits I had to go outside, get it and come back inside (in the rain). But what do the people waiting decide to do? Lock me out. In the rain, with the tea.

I get soaked, the tea and biscuits get soaked. The angry fat man comes out sees whats happening and lets me in.

Then the angry fat man screamed at me, and all the people doing their exam heard and they all LAUGHED. He grabbed the tray off me went inside to the exam hall and SCREAMED at them to shut up. Then he came back outside shoved the tray back at me and made me get him more.

The 2nd time around, the exact same thing happened and basically the supervisor was like "JUST COMMMMMMMMME INSIDDDDDDDDDDDDE" and all the people doing their exam were in stiches again, so he went in and was like "AARAHRGRHAGRHRGAHGRHGAHHHAHHHHH".