Desensitisation....

JC 2K3 · 25-09-2008 10:50PM #1

Reading through the thread about the swan being injured by a firework and the thread about the kitten being stabbed a while ago, I'm starting to notice that I have a very different reaction to these kind of stories to other AHers.

In such a thread, there's usually a load of very similar replies consisting of angry and/or upset outbursts where posters often describe in detail what exactly they'd like to do/be done to the culprits.

Now, I never have had the urge to reply to a thread like this in such a manner, I never suffer angry outbursts or feel particularly sad when I read things like this, or even when I hear about tragedies in the news. Because of this, I feel I'm quite desensitised compared to others.

So to what extent do you feel you're desensitised? Do even the most gruesome and inhumane stories fail to phase you, or are you affected by the mildest of tragedies?

SV · 25-09-2008 10:52PM

Very much desensitised.

I don't get sad, I just get angry, but I'll forget about it in another while.

Not much really gets to me in the way of tragedy..

PeakOutput · 25-09-2008 10:54PM

i reckon im 80% desensitised like i know these things are terrible etc etc but i dont let them affect me

its not like i wouldnt help the swan if i saw it happening or i dont wish it didnt happen its just that at this stage im like 'bad things happen for loads of reasons me getting upset wont help' and if i saw a picture it probably wouldnt be the most gruesome picture iv seen

paedophile stories especially regarding imprisonment / kidnapping for long periods i think will always get to me though

Ross_Mahon · 25-09-2008 10:59PM

I am much more annoyed with animals being hurt or killed, But when it happens to people on the news, I don't care?

I dunno...

JC 2K3 · 25-09-2008 11:02PM

Cruelty to animals and paedophilia seem to be the most emotive topics on here, and I don't really understand why, a mixture of cuteness and perceived innocence I'd imagine.

towel401 · 25-09-2008 11:03PM

i don't give a crap about any of this to avoid becoming a victim of the outrage machine

25-09-2008 11:14PM

mildest of tragedies.
can't cope with people being mean, or any sort of injustice

Darragh29 · 25-09-2008 11:20PM

I don't know if desensitisation is the word but I tend to get more upset at animals suffering than people.

I was looking at Prime Time tonight and Eddie Hobbs started reading out an e-mail that was sent to him today from someone with 5 investment properties and their own house and a 900 Euro HP bill on a car a month and they were basically suicidal and not able to cope and the banks were going to be repossessing a house by Christmas and the car was going to go, basically this person was starting to slip under the financial waterline and this was apparently a cry for help...

I felt more sympathy for the swan on this forum to be honest...

Sharpshooter · 25-09-2008 11:29PM

If l saw two lads kicking the s*it out of each other l probably would keep going , each one is capable of giving it back.
But if l saw someone attacking a defenseless animal or a child l wouldn't be able to walk away.
l dont know if that makes me right or wrong.

Insect Overlord · 25-09-2008 11:36PM

I think I can empathise with you OP. I know I've posted in both of those thread (RE: kitten and swan, RIP, etc) but to be honest I felt very little real emotion.

The best example of this in my own behaviour occured on Tuesday. I was in the queue to get lunch near college, where they keep a large wide-screen tv behind the bar. It's always set to Sky News during the day. The big banner headline was about the shootings in Finland. I read them, exclaimed "Holy fu<k!" and then proceeded to pay for my meal, sit down and chat about the All-Ireland for 20 minutes with my friends. Having seen so much of this type of story has pretty much completely desensitised me.

Aard · 25-09-2008 11:38PM

When I was about 16 I usen't bat an eyelid at such things as BME's Pain Olympics. Now, however, I think I've re-sensitised somewhat; I saw this video of an old man paddling these teenage girls until their butt-cheeks bled, and I was pretty badly affected by it.

Just getting old and conservative I guess $:\$

Krieg · 25-09-2008 11:43PM

Animals > Humans

I have a similar mindset, but only over certain animals which is hypocritical I know.

I barely flinched when I read it in the paper and was a bit surprised at the thread responses. If it was a kitten or puppy id be outraged and demand blood

ScumLord · 25-09-2008 11:45PM

Every ones desensitized to violence in the media but it's a completely different matter when it's happening in front of you. I think people are probably very removed from actual violence and feel desensitised.

Dudess · 25-09-2008 11:48PM

I'm seriously sensitive and emotional... but I quell those feelings in real life or I'd be a weeping mess the whole time - so in a way I kinda inflict desensitisation on myself.

Call Me Jimmy · 25-09-2008 11:48PM

Out of sight, out of mind for me.

Kinetic^ · 25-09-2008 11:58PM

Aard wrote: »

I saw this video of an old man paddling these teenage girls until their butt-cheeks bled, and I was pretty badly affected by it.

How can you talk about such arousing material without even posting a link.......for shame!!!

arybvtcw0eolkf · 25-09-2008 11:58PM

JC 2K3 wrote: »

Reading through the thread about the swan being injured by a firework and the thread about the kitten being stabbed a while ago, I'm starting to notice that I have a very different reaction to these kind of stories to other AHers.

In such a thread, there's usually a load of very similar replies consisting of angry and/or upset outbursts where posters often describe in detail what exactly they'd like to do/be done to the culprits.

Now, I never have had the urge to reply to a thread like this in such a manner, I never suffer angry outbursts or feel particularly sad when I read things like this, or even when I hear about tragedies in the news. Because of this, I feel I'm quite desensitised compared to others.

So to what extent do you feel you're desensitised? Do even the most gruesome and inhumane stories fail to phase you, or are you affected by the mildest of tragedies?

Your probably just young, self centered and have never really felt love for either your fellow human being or anything else for that matter.

I'm not slagging you, I was the same a long time ago.

But age and/or experiences change us. In my case I served during the civil war in Lebanon then I served in Somalia where I volunteered to help in the hospice in Baidoa, Somalia.

After that I got married and had two children, after some time I got pets and learned that you can love your pets just as much as other family members and treat them as such.

I've also killed.

OP, your not desensitised. You haven't lived enough.

Dudess · 26-09-2008 12:06AM

Ouch!

Seriously though, I have found myself getting more sensitive as I get older. When I was a pre-teen I used to read books like Flowers in the Attic about child abuse, child imprisonment, incest, spousal abuse and so on, and was vaguely upset by them. Now I wouldn't dream of reading them (well they're also trashy shyte but I'm still shocked that I was so relatively indifferent to the horror back when I read them).

I also used to devour Mandy comics - nothing too disturbing there you might think... actually no, the publishers made a point of featuring horrible stories every week about girls being beaten, starved, treated as slaves, made sleep in the attic/cellar etc because that's what pre-teen girls wanted to read (publishers made a point of finding this out). I used to lap it up. Now... I don't even want to think about those stories...

Gummy Panda · 26-09-2008 12:08AM

I wouldn't say i'm desensitised, i see stuff on tv and it doesn't bother me. Its probably because its happening on TV and my mind doesn't perceive it to be real or establish an emotional link to it.

Now if i was witness some horrible events and didn't bat an eye lid then i'd be desensitised.

Sharpshooter · 26-09-2008 12:10AM

Dudess wrote: »

Ouch!

Seriously though, I have found myself getting more sensitive as I get older. When I was a pre-teen I used to read books like Flowers in the Attic about child abuse, child imprisonment, incest, spousal abuse and so on, and was vaguely upset by them. Now I wouldn't dream of reading them (well they're also trashy shyte but I'm still shocked that I was so relatively indifferent to the horror back when I read them).

I also used to devour Mandy comics - nothing too disturbing there you might think... actually no, the publishers made a point of featuring horrible stories every week about girls being beaten, starved, treated as slaves, made sleep in the attic/cellar etc because that's what pre-teen girls wanted to read (publishers made a point of finding this out). I used to lap it up. Now... I don't even want to think about those stories...

l read all of those books and couldn't wait for the follow up.
But l stopped reading them when Virginia Andrews died and her daughter ( l think ) took over.
Read her first one and it wasn't the same at all.:(

Insect Overlord · 26-09-2008 12:13AM

As an aside, I believe that anyone who frequented rotten_dot_com as a kid will have been desensitised to visual imagery.

Dudess · 26-09-2008 12:14AM

sharpshooterH wrote: »

l read all of those books and couldn't wait for the follow up.
But l stopped reading them when Virginia Andrews died and her daughter ( l think ) took over.
Read her first one and it wasn't the same at all.:(

Yeah her family put together unpublished manuscripts or something, then kept churning out generic, Virginia Andrews-flavoured books. Tacky.

JC 2K3 · 26-09-2008 12:16AM

towel401 wrote: »

i don't give a crap about any of this to avoid becoming a victim of the outrage machine

Slightly off topic, but wow, that article sums up my life far more than I'm comfortable with.

Mairt wrote: »

Your probably just young, self centered and have never really felt love for either your fellow human being or anything else for that matter.

I'm not slagging you, I was the same a long time ago.

But age and/or experiences change us. In my case I served during the civil war in Lebanon then I served in Somalia where I volunteered to help in the hospice in Baidoa, Somalia.

After that I got married and had two children, after some time I got pets and learned that you can love your pets just as much as other family members and treat them as such.

I've also killed.

OP, your not desensitised. You haven't lived enough.

I don't know about never feeling love for anything or being self-centred, but yeah I do get your point. Volunteering (both here and maybe somewhere like Africa) is something I'd like to do in the future. The thought of people living in desperate poverty is actually something that does upset me from time to time.

Dudess wrote: »

Ouch!

Seriously though, I have found myself getting more sensitive as I get older. When I was a pre-teen I used to read books like Flowers in the Attic about child abuse, child imprisonment, incest, spousal abuse and so on, and was vaguely upset by them. Now I wouldn't dream of reading them (well they're also trashy shyte but I'm still shocked that I was so relatively indifferent to the horror back when I read them).

I also used to devour Mandy comics - nothing too disturbing there you might think... actually no, the publishers made a point of featuring horrible stories every week about girls being beaten, starved, treated as slaves, made sleep in the attic/cellar etc because that's what pre-teen girls wanted to read (publishers made a point of finding this out). I used to lap it up. Now... I don't even want to think about those stories...

I actually read stories/articles on Crime Library quite often and find them fascinating in a twisted way. I wonder, if it is true that one gets more sensitive as they get older, will having read all those gruesome stories will come back to haunt me.....

challengemaster · 26-09-2008 12:16AM

Know what ya mean. Came home whenever it was the Finland shooting was first on the news. Mother starts going on about how she's disgusted. I looked at the news for 2 seconds, heard he killed 9 people, shot himself and was arrested. I then laughed at how he managed to shoot himself and still get arrested. Stupid twat... So anyway...

Sharpshooter · 26-09-2008 12:19AM

Dudess wrote: »

Yeah her family put together unpublished manuscripts or something, then kept churning out generic, Virginia Andrews-flavoured books. Tacky.

Which is exactly why l lost interest, pat on the back for me for being so critically aware at such a young age.:)

Karl Hungus · 26-09-2008 12:30AM

I think people are too worried about desensitisation, when I don't even think it works like that. I think people gain empathy as they experience life, and that doesn't really wear down by media or anything else.

Any time I hear about cruelty to animals, I am absolutely ****ing disgusted, but I'm definitely an animal lover, in my life I've had a dog, a snake and a hamster. You make a very real connection with them, you love them as if they were part of your family, and if someone is indifferent to an animal's suffering then it's likely they never made an emotional connection the same way that I, or other people have.

I wonder, JC, did you ever have a pet?

JC 2K3 · 26-09-2008 12:39AM

Yes, 3.

A goldfish I couldn't care less about when I was 4/5.
A budgie I got when I was about 9, which I was thrilled with at the time, but quickly lost interest in. Was a bit sad when it died I guess.
And currently there's a dog in the family, which I love and certainly will lament when it dies (in probably 2/3 years).

But I still don't feel shock or upset when I hear of animals being harmed. In front of my eyes it might be a different story.

Sharpshooter · 26-09-2008 12:49AM

JC 2K3 wrote: »

Yes, 3.

A goldfish I couldn't care less about when I was 4/5.
A budgie I got when I was about 9, which I was thrilled with at the time, but quickly lost interest in. Was a bit sad when it died I guess.
And currently there's a dog in the family, which I love and certainly will lament when it dies (in probably 2/3 years).

But I still don't feel shock or upset when I hear of animals being harmed. In front of my eyes it might be a different story.

So what you are saying is that if you only hear about it , you don't care.
Yet if it happened in front of you , you would?
The fact that you only hear about it doesn't mean it didn't happen.
So do you mean you would only care if it happened and you could do something about it immediately?

JC 2K3 · 26-09-2008 12:54AM

sharpshooterH wrote: »

So what you are saying is that if you only hear about it , you don't care.
Yet if it happened in front of you , you would?
The fact that you only hear about it doesn't mean it didn't happen.
So do you mean you would only care if it happened and you could do something about it immediately?

I don't think it's to do with being able to do something about it, but rather that actually witnessing an atrocity first hand would affect me far more than simply hearing about or seeing pictures of it.

I can't explain why...

Sharpshooter · 26-09-2008 01:00AM

JC 2K3 wrote: »

I don't think it's to do with being able to do something about it, but rather that actually witnessing an atrocity first hand would affect me far more than simply hearing about or seeing pictures of it.

I can't explain why...

l guess it affects some more than others , and l can't explain why either.:(

Pride Fighter · 26-09-2008 01:01AM

Mairt wrote: »

Your probably just young, self centered and have never really felt love for either your fellow human being or anything else for that matter.

I'm not slagging you, I was the same a long time ago.

But age and/or experiences change us. In my case I served during the civil war in Lebanon then I served in Somalia where I volunteered to help in the hospice in Baidoa, Somalia.

After that I got married and had two children, after some time I got pets and learned that you can love your pets just as much as other family members and treat them as such.

I've also killed.

OP, your not desensitised. You haven't lived enough.

Jaysus, I wouldn't like to meet you down a dark alley.

Desensitisation....

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