Weirdest customer you have ever had to deal with in work

Guy:Incognito · 25-08-2008 05:09PM

boogle wrote: »

I worked in a city centre pharmacy while I was at college. Imelda "The Queen" was a regular. I'd say a lot of people have seen her hanging around O' Connell St/Henry St area: Walks around half naked, cackling her mental head off, and flashing her bits at people, mad black hair and badly-applied make-up. She used to lift up her skirt in front of the security guards (no knickers...ever) and feel them up. By the time she reached the counter we'd be in stiches. One time she asked me for paracetamol but "not the ones you have sex with, I want the ones you swallow!". (She was referring to suppositories). The pharmacist beside me said "suppositories are for rectal use" in a concerned tone. She replied, "Yeah, lots of things are for rectal use HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Another time she attacked a woman in the shop who was wearing a fur coat. Scratched the face off her!

I remember her. I used to work in the Sony Centre and regularly got a falsh in the door if I wasnt paying attention enough to turn away in time.

This was linked to in a similar thread here some time back. http://notalwaysright.com/page/46

Handsome Bob · 25-08-2008 05:17PM

boogle wrote: »

I worked in a city centre pharmacy while I was at college. Imelda "The Queen" was a regular. I'd say a lot of people have seen her hanging around O' Connell St/Henry St area: Walks around half naked, cackling her mental head off, and flashing her bits at people, mad black hair and badly-applied make-up. She used to lift up her skirt in front of the security guards (no knickers...ever) and feel them up. By the time she reached the counter we'd be in stiches. One time she asked me for paracetamol but "not the ones you have sex with, I want the ones you swallow!". (She was referring to suppositories). The pharmacist beside me said "suppositories are for rectal use" in a concerned tone. She replied, "Yeah, lots of things are for rectal use HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Another time she attacked a woman in the shop who was wearing a fur coat. Scratched the face off her!

Hard to miss her really. I remember one day my friends and I stopped to look at a bit of artwork by some bloke. Up staggers Imelda, points to a picture of the Twins Towers and say "Ha ha, they're all dead now!" She proceeds to laugh and laugh while my mates and I slowly backed away.:pac:

I've mostly worked behind the scenes so thankfully haven't had to deal with many customers.

Overflow · 25-08-2008 05:26PM

Stekelly wrote: »

I remember her. I used to work in the Sony Centre and regularly got a falsh in the door if I wasnt paying attention enough to turn away in time.

This was linked to in a similar thread here some time back. http://notalwaysright.com/page/46

Yeah i have seen her myself, im scared for life! That a hilarious website you posted

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011010110110010100100000011000010010000001110011011010000110100101110100

Guy:Incognito · 25-08-2008 05:34PM

Overflow wrote: »

Yeah i have seen her myself, im scared for life! That a hilarious website you posted

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011010110110010100100000011000010010000001110011011010000110100101110100

Theres some gems in there alright

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0011011010111100101110011011011000110010101100110001000000110011001110010011011110110110100100000011000
100110111101100001011100100110010001110011001000000110011001101001011100100111001101110100

01000010010101000101011100100000011101000110000101101100011010110110100101101110011001110010000001101001
01101110001000000110001001101001011011100110000101110010011110010010000001101101011000010110101101100101
01110011001000000110110101100101001000000110011001100101011001010110110000100000011011000110100101101011
01100101001000000100100100100000011010100111010101110011011101000010000001100100011010010111001101100011
01101111011101100110010101110010011001010110010000100000011101000110100001100101001000000110100101101110
01110100011001010111001001101110011001010111010000100000011011010111100100100000011100110110100101100111
00100000011011100110010101100101011001000111001100100000011000010010000001100011011010000110000101101110
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javaboy · 25-08-2008 05:35PM

Cut that out you 10

Overflow · 25-08-2008 05:38PM

javaboy wrote: »

Cut that out you 10

JangoFett · 25-08-2008 05:56PM

I used to work for a large multi-national internet service provider and I had this guy call up and calm as you like told me he was looking up child porn because he wanted to see if any of the kids looked like his own children. He was "concerned" cuz he wasn't allowed see his own kids anymore because of some "unpleasantness".

He went on to say the police had seized his pc and he wanted to place the company I worked for for giving him the internet and the porn was on the net...therefore, it was the company's fault!

I explained that if the cops found the porn he was surely going to jail at which point he took my name and said that when he was in court he would use MY name as a representative of the company so he could sue us for giving him the internet and therefore giving him child porn.

I then told him that I couldn't bring myself to continue talking to him and hung up. I really wished I was a smoker after it so I could do something other than get a cup of tea.

Ass · 25-08-2008 05:57PM

I had a crazy lady with a blue face (there was blue paint or something all over her face) come in to my shop and start throwing things out the door. I went out to collect the items and when I came back in the door I came in just in time to see her punch some kid in the face full force. The kid was only about 9 or 10 and it was his first time his mother had let him in to the shop on his own. I grabbed the blue face crazy lady and fucked her out the door, then called the cops. My boss came out just in time to see me removing her from the shop and when I told him what she did as I was throwing her out, he gave her a boot up the hole.

The kid was in tears.

LolaLuv · 25-08-2008 06:13PM

c - 13 wrote: »

Probably not the weirdest but still one of my favorites -

Working in a garden centre around Christmas time, selling Christmas trees. Some guy comes up to me looking for the biggest tree we had, no problem. So I show it to him, he's happy, i'm happy, I take his cash and carry the tree to the car park for him.

Then he stops beside a Seicento. I point out that he doesn't have a hope of fitting the tree in does he want me to put it out the back and he can collect it later with a larger car maybe ?

No, no, no problem he assures me. he jumps into the driver seat, rolls down the window and asks me to hand him the tree. A little confused at this stage I do so and off he drives out the gate with one hand out the window holding an 8 foot Christmas tree against the side of his car (in busy traffic).

I went back into the shop and turned on the local radio station to listen out for a crash involving a Seicento and a Christmas tree ...

That's priceless! He must have had very strong arms.

Ass Face wrote: »

I had a crazy lady with a blue face (there was blue paint or something all over her face) come in to my shop and start throwing things out the door. I went out to collect the items and when I came back in the door I came in just in time to see her punch some kid in the face full force. The kid was only about 9 or 10 and it was his first time his mother had let him in to the shop on his own. I grabbed the blue face crazy lady and ****ed her out the door, then called the cops. My boss came out just in time to see me removing her from the shop and when I told her what she did as I was throwing her out, he gave her a boot up the hole.

The kid was in tears.

I suppose I'm evil for laughing at that one more than the others.

Ross_Mahon · 25-08-2008 06:30PM

I sometimes cover photo in work, and we do get the weirdest pictures, when someone looses a child in birth, they do take pictures of the dead baby? Other stuff include nude pictures, gravestones, dead people and scangers on their holidays to costa del deadly.

There is a lot of people addicted to Solpadeine, we can only sell one packet per customer...A lot of weirdos getting large amount of things.

truecrippler · 25-08-2008 06:30PM

boogle wrote: »

I worked in a city centre pharmacy while I was at college. Imelda "The Queen" was a regular. I'd say a lot of people have seen her hanging around O' Connell St/Henry St area: Walks around half naked, cackling her mental head off, and flashing her bits at people, mad black hair and badly-applied make-up. She used to lift up her skirt in front of the security guards (no knickers...ever) and feel them up. By the time she reached the counter we'd be in stiches. One time she asked me for paracetamol but "not the ones you have sex with, I want the ones you swallow!". (She was referring to suppositories). The pharmacist beside me said "suppositories are for rectal use" in a concerned tone. She replied, "Yeah, lots of things are for rectal use HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Another time she attacked a woman in the shop who was wearing a fur coat. Scratched the face off her!

Haha, I know her, she lives down the road from me. Poor women though, she went mental when her husband died years ago.

Ass · 25-08-2008 06:45PM

PillyPen wrote: »

I suppose I'm evil for laughing at that one more than the others.

Not at all. The whole event happened before 9am in the middle of winter. The hour of 8am to 9am was quite a weird one that morning. 20 minutes previous to the crazy lady decking the kid some fella comes in to the shop still pissed from the night before, wearing only a pair of shorts. The temperature outside was close to 0. I had a great aul chat with him about why he was wearing fuck all. Then the blue faced crazy lady comes in and all that stuff happens, then at about 8:55 some girl tried to pay for her groceries with her knickers. It was all a bit of a trip.

AtomicHorror · 25-08-2008 06:48PM

About all that's ever happened to me was one customer who announced that my incompetence was evidence that if you "pay peanuts, you get monkeys". Given that I was working two jobs whilst finishing up a science degree and writing grant applications for a doctorate, I was pretty enraged at this comment. I didn't have to say anything though, as the customers behind him in the queue gave out to him constantly until he finally apologised to me.

There was also a guy who threatened to punch me because I asked him for ID.

LolaLuv · 25-08-2008 06:50PM

Ass Face wrote: »

Not at all. The whole event happened before 9am in the middle of winter. The hour of 8am to 9am was quite a weird one that morning. 20 minutes previous to the crazy lady decking the kid some fella comes in to the shop still pissed from the night before, wearing only a pair of shorts. The temperature outside was close to 0. I had a great aul chat with him about why he was wearing fuck all. Then the blue faced crazy lady comes in and all that stuff happens, then at about 8:55 some girl tried to pay for her groceries with her knickers. It was all a bit of a trip.

Holy crap, where were you working? Sounds like Bedlam! With her knickers??

Handsome Bob · 25-08-2008 07:33PM

Ass Face wrote: »

I had a crazy lady with a blue face (there was blue paint or something all over her face) come in to my shop and start throwing things out the door. I went out to collect the items and when I came back in the door I came in just in time to see her punch some kid in the face full force. The kid was only about 9 or 10 and it was his first time his mother had let him in to the shop on his own. I grabbed the blue face crazy lady and fucked her out the door, then called the cops. My boss came out just in time to see me removing her from the shop and when I told him what she did as I was throwing her out, he gave her a boot up the hole.

The kid was in tears.

That is justice served and comical all at the same time.:D:pac:

Kintarō Hattori · 25-08-2008 08:37PM

I had a lady from the country come into our electronics shop a good while ago. She wanted to return some items. I asked for her receipt and was shocked to see that she had bought the items (phone crimper, cable and rj11 connectors) 8 years previously.

Me - I'm sorry but I can't take these back from you.

Woman - Why not?

Me - You bought them 8 years ago.

Woman - But I haven't used them.

Me - I appreciate that but I can't take them back after 8 years. A week or two sure but I can't after 8 years.

Woman - But I haven't used them, surely you can sell them again?

Me - I'm afraid I can't take them back. Even if I could I wouldn't know how, you bought these when we were still using pounds and not euro. It's a whole different currancy.

Woman - OK then.

This is the shortened version, she was insistent I take them back.

eamon234 · 25-08-2008 09:44PM

There was this crazy bitch when I used to work in Galway years ago - first time I met her I was managing an electrical store she came in moaning about a broken kettle she bought years ago - when I told her politely that it was a out of warranty she went nuts (I don't even think she'd bought it in that shop!)
Started screaming around the place then started saying she was a diabetic and proceeded to faint. We put her on a chair and she came around then we said we'd call an ambulance and she refused took about two hours to get her out of the feckin shop turned out there was feck all wrong with her.
A year later I was working in a mobile phone shop in the city centre and lo and behold, in she walks and starts going off at the other girl there because of something stupid wrong with her phone - ten minutes later and she's fainted again! I tried to explain to the girl but she didn't believe me and the same scenario ensued as before.
A couple of months later I was in Casualty really sick with a stomach ulcer and rolling around in pain waiting to be seen. I hear a ruckus in the cubicle beside me - guess who! Pretending to have an attack again and giving me about a half an hour's more pain than I needed to have I could have killed her.
It's funny she looked normal enough, well dressed early 50's but what a feckin attention seeker!!

Firetrap · 25-08-2008 10:02PM

I've a friend who worked in a shop that Richie Kavanagh came into. He wears those odd clothes in real life as well :eek:

Lockstep · 25-08-2008 10:23PM

The Scientist wrote: »

Call Centre one from back in the Day too...
Rang a Customer in the UK and i asked to speak with a Mr Ridgeworth (not real name). He scowled back down the phone in the poshest of English Accents; "I beg your pardon, you'll address me by my proper title of Lord Ridgeworth".
I told him he was listed as 'Mr.' on our database... He went nuts and accused me of Treason to the Crown! :eek:
I told him i was calling from the ROI and said that title meant nothing to me.
Needless to say he didn't buy what i was selling.

Oh sweet Jesus.

That is fecking priceless.

yurmothrintites · 25-08-2008 10:53PM

I work in a drapers/clothes shop and the characters that come in are priceless. One woman rang the store today to tell me that she would be coming in to buy items. I mean surely the point of a general shop is that you can come in and go as you please.

gogglebok · 25-08-2008 10:57PM

yurmothrintites wrote: »

I work in a drapers/clothes shop and the characters that come in are priceless. One woman rang the store today to tell me that she would be coming in to buy items. I mean surely the point of a general shop is that you can come in and go as you please.

That's really sweet though. Like making a dinner reservation at Burger King. "We shall be four, one vegatarian..."

LolaLuv · 25-08-2008 11:14PM

yurmothrintites wrote: »

I work in a drapers/clothes shop and the characters that come in are priceless. One woman rang the store today to tell me that she would be coming in to buy items. I mean surely the point of a general shop is that you can come in and go as you please.

My friend works at a bookstore and this man called up to let him know he'd be the next poet laureate. Of course he was crazy, but the strange thing is my friend's store is in DC and the man lived in Texas.

Another customer called him to say he had received bad service at my friend's store and wouldn't be returning and my friend replied "Ok, bye!" and hung up on him.

homerjay2005 · 25-08-2008 11:24PM

The Scientist wrote: »

Call Centre one from back in the Day too...
Rang a Customer in the UK and i asked to speak with a Mr Ridgeworth (not real name). He scowled back down the phone in the poshest of English Accents; "I beg your pardon, you'll address me by my proper title of Lord Ridgeworth".
I told him he was listed as 'Mr.' on our database... He went nuts and accused me of Treason to the Crown! :eek:
I told him i was calling from the ROI and said that title meant nothing to me.
Needless to say he didn't buy what i was selling.

hmmm, wonder is it the same lad we used to deal with in a previous job of mine. there was a "woman" who called herself lady something (cant remember) but we used call him harry or something, as this was the name on the database. quick check in google led us to a lad up for fraud and the like, but "she" tried to convince us that "she" was this famous/important lady with loads of money.

wonder if its the same fellow? i think he then wanted to be called lord every time we rang him after months of us refusing to update his details to female ones.

One-Day-Juande · 25-08-2008 11:27PM

The Scientist, were you by any chance trying to sell this 'Lord' accidental death insurance worth up to have a million pounds?

There's this fella we call crispy Paul who comes into our shop regular enough. He's really nice but definately not all there. He's got this shaved head with large bald patches.

You'd catch him wandering around the offey and he stops gets on his hands and knees to pick up loose change. He tries really hard not to be noticed and will attempt to make small talk to distract you. He comes out with some priceless stuff, allways starts with "How are yuuu? Nice day isn't it" (really strange accent, hard to place) and then go off on a tangent about the number of carry-out franchises and the economy.

Other times he comes in and waits in the queue until he gets to the top and asks, "do you have any crispy 50's?" (or 10's, 20's). He'll produce a note in near perfect condition. You'll go through a stack of notes with him, "hmm no, do you have any other ones?", you might show him what to you are two notes that completely the same but he'll decide that ine is better than the other.

Anyway once he's picked one and you do the exchange he allways comes out with the same line... "Now do you see the way I gave you that 50 there?" yes, "and do you see the way you gave me 50 in return?" yes, "well we did an exchange there, that means we're quits, we're evens". I really wish there was some way of writing in his tone of voice, it's just priceless.

Never fails to brighten up your day, unless you're really busy when he can be a pain in the ass.

magick · 25-08-2008 11:52PM

call center tech support

one woman was on the phone nice lady and didnt think anything of it, when the problem was sorted she said "ohh i love ur irish accent", and basically started talking a little dirty to me, then asking for my contact details. I said no i wouldnt be giving them out, she then tried to give her details out, but i stopped her mid sentence and said "look you sound like a lovely person, but u dont know who i truly am, i mean i could be a massvie rapist"

she hung up

i wonder what shes doing now

Ass · 26-08-2008 12:05AM

magick wrote: »

call center tech support

one woman was on the phone nice lady and didnt think anything of it, when the problem was sorted she said "ohh i love ur irish accent", and basically started talking a little dirty to me, then asking for my contact details. I said no i wouldnt be giving them out, she then tried to give her details out, but i stopped her mid sentence and said "look you sound like a lovely person, but u dont know who i truly am, i mean i could be a massvie rapist"

she hung up

i wonder what shes doing now

She could have been hot which would entirely eliminate the creepyness.

ashyle · 26-08-2008 12:05AM

Tupins wrote: »

I worked in a poultry company years ago doing christmas cover in the office. A big pharmaceutical company in the area used to give their workers a free turkey for christmas. They would each get a voucher and come to our office to claim it. This company had ordered the large size turkeys. Anyway, this woman came to collect hers one day and on seeing the size of it she turned to me and said (in all sincerity) "Oh that's quite big, will it fit in my oven?" - she actually expected me to answer that!!

I work in a DIY store, get questions like that allll the time. 'Will this colour paint look nice in my kitchen?' ??!

A great one I had recently was, 'do yis sell Durex paint?' I laugh. They freeze. '**** I mean Dulux!!!! I can't believe I said that I'm mortified!'

neaideabh · 26-08-2008 12:35AM

Was working in Centre when I was younger! This middle aged lady come to the counter with a newspaper... proceeded to take a scissors out of her bag and to cut the barcode off so she wouldn't have to pay for it. All I could do is laugh and tell her to get out!

Creamy Goodness · 26-08-2008 12:47AM

i don't go well with people so i chose a career that i don't have to deal with people.

magick · 26-08-2008 01:22AM

Cremo wrote: »

i don't go well with people so i chose a career that i don't have to deal with people.

and that would be...........?

Weirdest customer you have ever had to deal with in work

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