Nasty Descriptions/Expressions (sick)

Don1 · 19-03-2008 01:04PM #1

So, just thought a collection of rather interesting descriptions/expressions might go down well. You know the kind that pop up in ladish banter.

I'll start with this:

Mudbutt - the result of an unsuccessful separation of a less than solid defication. Cleanup operation first requires a scooping sequence before any wiping can take place.

"Jaysis lads I'd an awful dose of mudbutt there"

John Mason · 19-03-2008 01:30PM

Sweating like a rapist

Sweating like a paedo in a barney suit

kev_s88 · 19-03-2008 01:35PM

sweating like a whore in mass

sweating like a pedo in a playground

this one is not one of mine and is pretty nasty:

if shes old enough to bleed shes bleedin' old enough for me"

WindSock · 19-03-2008 01:42PM

'like a damp terrier eating a kebab' = badly groomed fanny

Don1 · 19-03-2008 01:50PM

"Jaysis I'm so hungry I'd eat the scabs off a nackers sack."

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:23PM

kev_s88 wrote: »

sweating like a whore in mass

sweating like a pedo in a playground

this one is not one of mine and is pretty nasty:

if shes old enough to bleed shes bleedin' old enough for me"

If there's grass on the pitch..... PLAY BALL

:D:D:D:D

Don1 · 19-03-2008 02:24PM

TheBlackThing wrote: »

If there's grass on the pitch..... PLAY BALL
:D:D:D:D

And if there isn't, flip her over and play in the muck! :eek:

trout · 19-03-2008 02:25PM

referring to drunks or alcoholics ... pa trout would say "that fella would drink pus from an open wound".

the "sweatin' like a ... " reminded me of this old one ... in very bad taste

Sweatin' like Jill Dando looking for her front door key

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:28PM

Its like putting a rats tail into a barrel of water

Used to descibe a female who's been "around" quite a bit..

LimerickCity · 19-03-2008 02:28PM

Afraid to fart in case i **** in my pants.

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:29PM

Or, she'd suck a golf ball through a garden hose!

Don1 · 19-03-2008 02:30PM

She'd suck the chrome off a spanner.

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:31PM

She's got nipples like Scania wheel nuts!

LimerickCity · 19-03-2008 02:32PM

She's got nipples like monkeys fingers.
She's got nipples like fag butts.

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:35PM

You could hang wet duffel coats off those nipples

trout · 19-03-2008 02:37PM

nipples like JCB starter buttons
nipples like a fighter pilot's thumbs

and my particular favourite, handed down by pa trout ... nipples like a pygmy's cock :cool:

LimerickCity · 19-03-2008 02:37PM

I wouldnt get up on her to get over a wall.

I'f i'd a bag of mickey's i wouldnt give her wan.
I'f i'd a bag of mickeys i wouldnt even let her look into the bag.

She's a head like a bag of chisels.

Don1 · 19-03-2008 02:38PM

Chef's Arse: suffered mainly by chefs and those in the catering/service industry. After long shift the red raw and stinging chaffing between the arse cheeks. Only cure is Sudocream, or neat tea tree oil if you have a high pain threshold!

Slow Motion · 19-03-2008 02:38PM

She could suck start a leaf blower!

Don1 · 19-03-2008 02:39PM

She has a face on her like a buldog that just liked piss off a nettle,
She has a face on her that'd run rats from a dump.

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:39PM

You'd want to put a bag over her head before you'd give her one...

And a bag over yours incase hers fell off

LimerickCity · 19-03-2008 02:40PM

I've seen better legs in a snack box.

Slow Motion · 19-03-2008 02:42PM

She was so ugly a sniper wouldn't take her out

She was so ugly the tide wouldn't take her out

ShayK1 · 19-03-2008 02:42PM

Breast Box: Tit ****
Junior Box: the less said the better....

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:42PM

used to insult a little weed of a lad who's stating an arguement with you

I've seen bigger hands on a clock!

rstans · 19-03-2008 02:44PM

She has a face like a well slapped arse.

Slow Motion · 19-03-2008 02:45PM

Her skirt was so short you could see her lunch!:p

ShayK1 · 19-03-2008 02:47PM

Slow Motion wrote: »

Her skirt was so short you could see her lunch!:p

best one yet!!

LimerickCity · 19-03-2008 02:47PM

I'd suck the farts out of her arse.

TheBlackThing · 19-03-2008 02:49PM

I'd walk over a thousand miles of burning coal just to w@nk in her shaddow

Don1 · 19-03-2008 02:49PM

I'd crawl naked across a field of broken glass to w*nk in her shadow!

Nasty Descriptions/Expressions (sick)

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