Advertisement
Help Keep Boards Alive. Support us by going ad free today. See here: https://subscriptions.boards.ie/.
https://www.boards.ie/group/1878-subscribers-forum

Private Group for paid up members of Boards.ie. Join the club.
Hi all, please see this major site announcement: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058427594/boards-ie-2026

lies your parents told you

  • 19-03-2008 12:11AM
    #1
    langerdan79
    Closed Accounts Posts: 57 ✭✭


    when i was a smallie my parents told me that if i ever heard the ice-cream van playing its music then that meant that they had no ice-creams left so there would be no point going over to it. wasn't till i was a teenager till i realised this lie. still haven't forgiven them.
    anyone else lied to in such a cruel manner???


«1

Comments

  • #2
    Run_to_da_hills
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,009 ✭✭✭✭Run_to_da_hills


    Santa was the greatest ever told to me by my folks.


  • #3
    Das Kitty
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,231 ✭✭✭✭Das Kitty


    My dad was a right ass. He told me and my younger brother that there was a Capybara under the stairs. We used to be afraid to go to the bathroom, to the kitchen or upstairs unaccompanied, it wasn't even him who had the task of getting us to bed. Worst thing was that my little bro was so scared he wouldn't come down to the loo at night and wet his bed for ages longer than was normal. Not that we knew what a Capybara was mind you!

    When we were cleaning the house out to rent a couple of years ago I was assigned the task of cleaning out under the stairs, I swear when I opened the door I got such a shudder!

    Baxtard.


  • #4
    fizzynicenice
    Closed Accounts Posts: 466 ✭✭fizzynicenice


    I work in Xtravision (g'wan laugh you bast*rds) and a seriously large amount of people make me lie to their children, or lie about me to them, its messed up
    "stopit chantelle, or the man'll kick you out"
    or "isn't this not for sale today *wink wink*"
    at least lie to em yourself


  • #5
    flanum
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,107 ✭✭✭flanum


    "if you dont stop crying your teeth will fall out"!

    or when i permanently had my hand down my kecks "if you dont leave it alone, itll fall off"!!


  • #6
    vektarman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,931 ✭✭✭vektarman


    Das Kitty wrote: »
    My dad was a right ass. He told me and my younger brother that there was a Capybara under the stairs. We used to be afraid to go to the bathroom, to the kitchen or upstairs unaccompanied, it wasn't even him who had the task of getting us to bed. Worst thing was that my little bro was so scared he wouldn't come down to the loo at night and wet his bed for ages longer than was normal. Not that we knew what a Capybara was mind you!

    When we were cleaning the house out to rent a couple of years ago I was assigned the task of cleaning out under the stairs, I swear when I opened the door I got such a shudder!

    Baxtard.
    I just had to google that capybara thing, I didn't realize it's an evil ghost!


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    Overheal
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 86,683 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    That Gilligans Island was real and that those poor people were stuck on an island somewhere.


  • #8
    javaboy
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,094 ✭✭✭✭javaboy


    In this thread about childhood misconceptions http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055256489:
    javaboy wrote: »
    Back when I worked in a leisure centre type thingy, I would get parents whose kids wanted to do activity X comin up. The parent obviously didn't want them to do it and would say "No sorry Oisin/Tadgh/Cian/Jack (all kids are called these names now :mad:), the man says it closed"

    They'd give me the wink then to go along with it which I would most of the time. But when they would say stuff like "Leave that alone Fiachra, the man's going to come over and throw you out" I would make a point of not giving a shee-ite about what the kid was doing. Lazy parents using me to do their dirty work :D
    fizzynicenice wrote: »
    I work in Xtravision (g'wan laugh you bast*rds) and a seriously large amount of people make me lie to their children, or lie about me to them, its messed up
    "stopit chantelle, or the man'll kick you out"
    or "isn't this not for sale today *wink wink*"
    at least lie to em yourself

    That's creepy man. Right down to the crappy job (swap Xtravision for Leisureplex and Fiachra for Chantelle). :eek:


  • #9
    Das Kitty
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,231 ✭✭✭✭Das Kitty


    vektarman wrote: »
    I just had to google that capybara thing, I didn't realize it's an evil ghost!

    I had it built up in my head to be a cross between Jaws, the Blob, and an octopus.

    My Dad is a world class liar, he had us believing that when he lived in Germany briefly that he used to get mistaken for the Fuhrer and instead of stoning him like you'd expect they all hailed his return.

    He also told us that Vicki Michelle (Yvette from Allo Allo) was his mistress (or your new mother as he'd say) , he had a photo of them together at some Toastmaster's Ball or summat, he was still married to my mother at this stage. More recently he claimed the same about Tracy Piggott.


  • #10
    Richie860504
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 130 ✭✭Richie860504


    When ever I did anything wrong my father used to tell me I'd be sent to a foster family the next day. Wouldn't be able to stop crying all night.


  • #11
    Stench Blossoms
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    When I was two or three my dad told me was removing the rear wall of our house and replacing it with a sliding glass door.

    I asked him how he was going to knock the wall down and he said him and a few of his friends were gonna just run at it and it would break. I asked him could I help and he said yes so I ran face first into the wall and broke my nose.


  • Advertisement
  • #12
    seamus
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 68,173 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    langerdan79 wrote: »
    when i was a smallie my parents told me that if i ever heard the ice-cream van playing its music then that meant that they had no ice-creams left so there would be no point going over to it. wasn't till i was a teenager till i realised this lie. still haven't forgiven them.
    anyone else lied to in such a cruel manner???
    Haha :D Totally using that one on my kids when they're old enough to pester me for ice cream. And when I of course, have kids.


  • #13
    skywalker
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,707 ✭✭✭skywalker


    orla wrote: »
    When I was two or three my dad told me was removing the rear wall of our house and replacing it with a sliding glass door.

    I asked him how he was going to knock the wall down and he said him and a few of his friends were gonna just run at it and it would break. I asked him could I help and he said yes so I ran face first into the wall and broke my nose.

    Thats friggin hilarious, for about 10 seconds, until you think about the implications of a man letting his lil daughter break her nose. I hope your mam ate him for that one.


  • #14
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    javaboy wrote: »
    In this thread about childhood misconceptions http://boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055256489:





    That's creepy man. Right down to the crappy job (swap Xtravision for Leisureplex and Fiachra for Chantelle). :eek:

    I was staying in a hotel on christmas eve night a few years back, and there was a woman, and her mother and her 2 kids at a table nearby. I went up to the bar, to get a drink, and I heard the grandmother telling one of the kids, that if they did not behave "The man at the bar will take you a way". I got so angry at this, because in the culture we live in, if the child mentioned to someone else in the hotel that I was going to take him or her away, my life is screwed! I waited til she was at the bar, and then I went over and asked her not to use me to discipline her kids. I said there was a man in a red suit arriving shortly that she could easily use. She got pissed of and told me to f*ck off. But it still really annoyed me.

    As for lies my parents told me:

    Santa claus and the tooth fairy were the main ones. Oh yeah and they told me they were married. I recently found out they are not, and that my dad is in fact married to someone else.


  • #15
    LouOB
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,181 ✭✭✭LouOB


    Im the eldest of 3 girls - one day my middle sister told the youngest that mam was once arrested for drugs. Youngest sister cried her eyes out all night - my other sister cried too, with laughter.
    Kids are soo cruel too


  • #16
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 4,040 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    my dog is gone to live at a farm....the bastards:(


  • #17
    bobbyjoe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 798 ✭✭✭bobbyjoe


    One time the Muppet show was on a bank holiday Monday. I loved the show so was very excited. My dad told me that he had rang RTE and asked them to put it on for me. For years afterwards I was bugging him to ring RTE and get them to put the Muppet show on.


  • #18
    It BeeMee
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 748 ✭✭✭It BeeMee


    syklops wrote: »
    Santa claus and the tooth fairy were the main ones.

    HA! We had them too.

    And some "God" bloke that could make the deaf blind and cure ham and all sorts of weird stuff....


  • #19
    ROCKMAN
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,246 ✭✭✭ROCKMAN


    langerdan79 wrote: »
    when i was a smallie my parents told me that if i ever heard the ice-cream van playing its music then that meant that they had no ice-creams left so there would be no point going over to it. wasn't till i was a teenager till i realised this lie. still haven't forgiven them.
    anyone else lied to in such a cruel manner???

    EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND ;);)


  • #20
    Stench Blossoms
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,390 ✭✭✭Stench Blossoms


    skywalker wrote: »
    Thats friggin hilarious, for about 10 seconds, until you think about the implications of a man letting his lil daughter break her nose. I hope your mam ate him for that one.

    His excuse was he didn't think i was that stupid or gullible.


  • #21
    Dragan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    that they loved me :(


  • Advertisement
  • #22
    syklops
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,966 ✭✭✭✭syklops


    God was the other one. But I forgave them because their parents lied to them about it aswell.

    I had philosophical thought last night while trying to get to sleep. If god does exist, does HE wonder where he came from? Does He wonder was He created by some higher being? Or is He too smart for that?


  • #23
    boardinwork
    Closed Accounts Posts: 407 ✭✭boardinwork


    I found condoms in my parents room and was convinced that they were "tights for daddys willy for the cold" :rolleyes:


  • #24
    passive
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,403 ✭✭✭passive


    orla wrote: »
    When I was two or three my dad told me was removing the rear wall of our house and replacing it with a sliding glass door.

    I asked him how he was going to knock the wall down and he said him and a few of his friends were gonna just run at it and it would break. I asked him could I help and he said yes so I ran face first into the wall and broke my nose.

    Best. Parenting. Ever. ^.^


  • #25
    Steve
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,575 ✭✭✭✭Steve


    vektarman wrote: »
    I just had to google that capybara thing, I didn't realize it's an evil ghost!

    Thought a capybara was a large rat:confused:


  • #26
    kev_s88
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,654 ✭✭✭kev_s88


    stevec wrote: »
    Thought a capybara was a large rat:confused:

    they are the largest rodents in the world.not quite rats though

    they are related to Chinchillas and Guinea Pigs


  • #27
    Das Kitty
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,231 ✭✭✭✭Das Kitty


    stevec wrote: »
    Thought a capybara was a large rat:confused:

    vektarman was making a funneh. The fact that I went along with it is probably what caused the confusion.

    They're pretty cute for rodents I have to say, I love their moustaches.

    capy10.jpg


  • #28
    emeraldstar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,383 ✭✭✭emeraldstar


    boardinwork wrote: »
    I found condoms in my parents room and was convinced that they were "tights for daddys willy for the cold" :rolleyes:
    My sister and I found a new box of condoms in my dad's car and burst out laughing. He told us he had asked for Aspirin and that's what they gave him by mistake. We thought it was hilarious that the people in the chemist were so stupid and ran in the door to mammy when we got home all: "you'll never guess what happened Daddy in the chemist?!!" Oh how gullible...and it was only quite recently I realised that this was not the actual way of events :rolleyes:


  • #29
    poukai
    Closed Accounts Posts: 37 ✭poukai


    Capybaras rock, although I can understand how the name would spook you out as a kid.

    When I was tiny, about 3 or 4 my parents went through a tough financial patch and took in some rabbits that they bred in the back garden to provide meat for us all. They told me it was "furry chicken". It wouldn't be so bad if my mum didn't tell this story over and over again as if it was the funniest thing on earth. I haven't been able to touch rabbit meat since then and I'm not sure I have quite forgiven them, not for being in that situation, but for telling the story to everyone like a joke.


  • #30
    RedXIV
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 8,570 ✭✭✭RedXIV


    Getting told if you bite your finger nails, fingers grow in your stomach. scared the s**t out of me when i was 4.


  • Advertisement
  • #31
    Dr_Pepper
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,052 ✭✭✭Dr_Pepper


    Parents were cruel and sat me down quite seriously and told me i was adopted. No sooner had i begun to think "what if" than i saw a smirk on the side of my mothers face. Bastads.

    I got the last laugh when i cut the toes off all their socks.


Advertisement
Advertisement