What do you guys think?

blackbelt · 14-02-2008 05:38PM #1

Before I start this thread,I want to make it clear that I am not a racist or flaming/trolling.

Ok,just a thread and a poll to see what the general consensus for the following scenario is.

I was having lunch in college there a couple of weeks ago and the table holds ten people approx.I was on my own and had popped down to get a very quick lunch as I had to do some work.

Anyway,when I sat down,there was an asian (chinese/japanese) girl sitting on the far end of the table on my side.I'll call them asian to be more pc.Me at one corner and her at the other on the inside by the window/wall.There was just the 2 of us at the start with a distance of 3 or 4 chairs between us.

So I'm there eating and enjoying my lunch as I do when more and more asian people arrive at the table.I felt just a tad bit out of place as I was surrounded by what was obviously a large group of friends but didn't take too much notice of it at that time and kept on eating/enjoying my lunch.I was nearing the end of my meal when one of the asian girls interrupted/asked me if I could move/sit somewhere else as one of her friends didn't have a chair.The request or question was something along the lines of "sorry,do you mind moving as my friend wants to sit here".

I was a bit taken aback as I didn't expect this at all.I thought or my perception of asian people were that they were a more docile or timid bunch of people when it comes to interactions in a foreign country.

So,with some food still in my mouth,I waited so that I could talk with my mouth empty.I replied in a somewhat kind manner accepting this request.I found it strange at the time but I acted politely.

Anyway,it kind of got to me afterwards when thinking about it more.Now I realise this isn't a huge injustice or anything but I felt a bit mad for A) being interrupted when having my lunch and

being there first and having to make way for somebody else when this group of people sat down after I did.

There was another table behind us which holded 10 people so it didn't take much to move and originally I didn't put too much thinking into where I sat as I was just looking for a table with free seats.My thinking was that the more polite thing to do was for them to have sat there at that table in a larger group when they arrived after me instead of interrupting.I couldn't foresee a large group of mates wanting to sit with the original girl.

Was I dignified in being polite and accepting the request or should I have been polite and stood my ground citing that I was having my lunch already?

chopperbyrne · 14-02-2008 05:41PM

As you said yourself, there were readily available seats for you to sit at so I don't see a problem with their request.

If there were no other seats, it'd be a bit rude, but not in this case.

Duggy747 · 14-02-2008 05:44PM

blackbelt wrote: »

Was I dignified in being polite and accepting the request or should I have been polite and stood my ground citing that I was having my lunch already?

You should have stood up angrily, took off your top and should them the massive swatstika tattooed on your chest.

Other than that you were lovely and polite but you shouldn't have moved. If there were chairs behind them then one of them could have grabbed it and sat down like any other normal, polite person would have done.

monkeyfudge · 14-02-2008 06:17PM

blackbelt wrote: »

Before I start this thread,I want to make it clear that I am not a racist or flaming/trolling.

Then why mention the race of the people involved at all? I don't see what bearing it has on the tale.

Baudelaire · 14-02-2008 06:24PM

I think you were mad to move, you paid for your lunch and occupided the table first, if anything the girl should have known there wouldn't be enough seats for her friends and chose the other table. You were entitled to finish your lunch in peace.

+1 to Monkeyfudge, their nationality is irrelivant to the story

prendy · 14-02-2008 06:25PM

ok..your on your own and a group want the table..no big deal IMO.
id have moved if it was me.

LadyJ · 14-02-2008 06:30PM

blackbelt wrote: »

I thought or my perception of asian people were that they were a more docile or timid bunch of people when it comes to interactions in a foreign country.

There are confident/rude people in every country in the world tbh. Sorry to shock you with this revelation.

Creature · 14-02-2008 06:31PM

I think you should have challenged them to a martial arts showdown, a 'kumite in the cafeteria' if you will. Winner gets the trophy, the girl and their seat at the table.

the dee · 14-02-2008 06:34PM

blackbelt wrote: »

Before I start this thread,I want to make it clear that I am not a racist

But....

Anyway,when I sat down,there was an asian (chinese/japanese) girl sitting on the far end of the table on my side.I'll call them asian to be more pc..

And then...

I was a bit taken aback as I didn't expect this at all.I thought or my perception of asian people were that they were a more docile or timid bunch of people when it comes to interactions in a foreign country.

Sounds a bit racist to me....

Anyway, it's up to you whether or not to move in a situation like this. It's probably politer to move, but it'd be politer of them not to ask you to move. It's also be ok to stand your ground.

Get over it.

RxQueen · 14-02-2008 06:35PM

it doesnt really make much difference to you now does it, because you moved and that was your decision? dont dwell on things man for its nearly dinner time now

14-02-2008 06:38PM

If you're dining alone why did you sit at a table for ten? were there not any smaller tables around??

PS no need to mention race!

WindSock · 14-02-2008 06:39PM

I would have moved to make way for the larger crowd. I know what it is like trying to politely reserve a large table for a crowd, it's hard to get everyone together when there are lone persons scattered about in dribs and drabs.

And you are a racialist.

FunkZ · 14-02-2008 06:39PM

I'd probably move if they were polite about it. But if I didn't want to I'd tell them, ya shoulda karate chopped them.

brow_601 · 14-02-2008 06:43PM

...comin over here takin our jobs and our seats...

Pighead · 14-02-2008 06:44PM

What does Pighead think? Pighead thinks the amount of lines you wrote down in your post was way too excessive considering the relative simplicity of the message you were trying to convey. Half way through, Pighead was getting bored and at one point a daddy long legs passed by and started to look a lot more exciting than he had any right to be.

In reality this would have done you
"Hi, I was sitting down enjoying my lunch today when an Asian chick politely asked me to move thus allowing her friend to sit beside here and her gang of other friends. I did so without fuss but upon reflection felt as though maybe I should have stayed. What do you think?"

There you go simplistic short and to the point. You could even forsake the "Hi" if you so pleased.

Pighead has noticed that long windedness has become very prevalent in todays society. It seems to be a reaction against the text generation who can barely string two words together when faced with anything resembling a conversation. But it seems this reaction has gone too far the OTHER WAY! Lordee me, it ain't easy to get that balance.

Anyway, interesting thread.

FruitLover · 14-02-2008 06:51PM

blackbelt wrote: »

I was a bit taken aback as I didn't expect this at all.I thought or my perception of asian people were that they were a more docile or timid bunch of people when it comes to interactions in a foreign country.

Lols, no prejudging people at all here, eh? :rolleyes: Over half the population of the planet is Asian. Bit silly to think all ~3 billion of them behave the same way.

Pighead · 14-02-2008 06:55PM

FruitLover wrote: »

Lols, no prejudging people at all here, eh? :rolleyes: Over half the population of the planet is Asian. Bit silly to think all ~3 billion of them behave the same way.

Thats not fair FruitLover. Sometimes these generalisations are bang on the money.

For instance, over 80% of the boards population are male and its absolutely true to say that nearly all of them are virgins.

14-02-2008 06:56PM

FruitLover wrote: »

Lols, no prejudging people at all here, eh? :rolleyes: Over half the population of the planet is Asian. Bit silly to think all ~3 billion of them behave the same way.

Chinese man at the police station looking at the line of skangers trying to look for the one that knicked his wallet, "so solly all skangers look the same to me!"

Jimbo · 14-02-2008 07:01PM

Don't think it makes any difference that they were Asian. There are plenty of ignorant Irish people out there. Obviously they should have moved if you were there first, but if they asked politely I would move

herbieflowers · 14-02-2008 07:03PM

why do you refer to yourself in the third person?

Latchy · 14-02-2008 07:04PM

blackbelt wrote: »

Was I dignified in being polite and accepting the request or should I have been polite and stood my ground citing that I was having my lunch already?

Yes you were because you showed that in these times of ....for want of a beter word ,political /social correctness you showed that good manners still exists .

Reminds me of the time i was a passenger on a ferry and engaged with another irish national .I was approached by a finnish guy who with his wife and two kids in tow asked if it were ok for me to move a few seats across so he wife and kids could sit down ?.Not in any way did my moving a few seats obstruct me from continuing my chat so i was happy to oblige and moved as requested .However, what i did find disturbing was on plonking himself down next to me, finnish and wife proceeeded to not only stare at me but was evesdroping on our converstaion in a way that might best be described as ' intrusive' (or just down right nosey ) .So after 30 odd minutes of this and in keeping my polite manner , my friend amd i moved much further away .He might just have pushed his luck if he had continued his Marty feldman look

togster · 14-02-2008 07:05PM

jimbo78 wrote: »

Don't think it makes any difference that they were Asian. There are plenty of ignorant Irish people out there. Obviously they should have moved if you were there first, but if they asked politely I would move

yeah exactly.

seraphimvc · 14-02-2008 07:20PM

i want to know which college is it!:)

tbh,OP,you should have seen that coming?and in fairness ,they shouldn't really 'ask' you to leave in the first place,ya got the seat first!but they do ask 'can you...?' right?maybe you are angry of she didnt say 'please?'?

i guess either the asian chick is not hot enough or ya failed to get her number

rubadub · 14-02-2008 07:22PM

monkeyfudge wrote: »

Then why mention the race of the people involved at all? I don't see what bearing it has on the tale.

I do, it is sort of pre-answering the inevitable question "why did you think they were all together

blackbelt wrote: »

what was obviously a large group of friends

Could have been a bunch of girls with science soc t-shirts, or a bunch of lads with cork GAA jerseys. Just like police men will call out race when describing a criminal, it is descriptive, big deal.

blackbelt wrote: »

I thought or my perception of asian people were that they were a more docile or timid bunch of people when it comes to interactions in a foreign country.

Now that is a racist remark, but racist doesn't necessarily have to be such a bad thing, it is prejudiced, which simply does mean prejudging, having preconcieved ideas. The word racist and prejudiced straight away seem negative to some people, you could say people have become prejudiced about what they mean.

I would have moved no problem, on planes I have asked people if they want to sit together if they are obviously with each other and I am in the middle, or on an aisle seat across the way.

stepbar · 14-02-2008 07:28PM

The cheeky fcuker :rolleyes: I wouldn't have moved.

Pherekydes · 14-02-2008 07:29PM

Too long-winded, Pighead. This...

Pighead wrote: »

Anyway, interesting thread.

...would have sufficed.

As to the OP's dilemma, this is fine:

Duggy747 wrote:

Other than that you were lovely and polite but you shouldn't have moved. If there were chairs behind them then one of them could have grabbed it and sat down like any other normal, polite person would have done.

This would probably be my reaction.

Perhaps if I was nearly finished my lunch I would simply get up and walk out, leaving my unfinished lunch on the table. They would get their way and the coveted seat, but, hopefully, they would feel really uncomfortable about it.

whatsgoinon · 14-02-2008 08:45PM

if any group of people did this to me, I would have pretended not to speak english, nibbled my food very slowly, chewing it way more than was necessary, would leave down my knife and fork between bites for at least 3 minutes, stand up and stretch several times to give them the impression i was leaving, then sit back down again. you can be sure if a group of irish people asked somebody of another race to move they would also be called racist.

I lived in asia for 2 years, they walk about in large groups very slowly, but asides from that are super people, and i miss my life there.

biko · 14-02-2008 08:50PM

Their Kung Fu was stronger than yours

Just move man. No biggie.

Aard · 14-02-2008 08:58PM

What the girl did was rude and put you in an uncomfortable lose-lose situation.

And who gives a $hit if she was 'Asian'? She was being bitchy no matter what race she was.

MCMLXXXIII · 14-02-2008 09:08PM

Maybe you could have been social and interacted with them - joined their group for a lunch.

But if not: She was there first. There were ten of them and one of you. You should have moved out of their way, you shouldn't have even taken time to think and/or make a remark, and you should have been polite about it.

Oh yeah...you are racist by nature, you can tell just by your wording of the post.

Balmed Out · 14-02-2008 09:12PM

They were probably either a chinese triad gang or a japanese yakuza gang so I would have picked up my stool and started to teach them a lesson, cant be moving in on your turf like.

What do you guys think?

What would you have done? 109 votes

Comments