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Problem....

  • 24-01-2008 9:34pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭


    Hi, em I just thought I'd post this here because it seems like the kind of place I could get help with this.
    I'm a teenager and absolutely all of my friends are all big drinkers. Its getting to the stage where every night out is a drinking night out.
    I don't drink, and I.ve decided I never will. But I can't go out with my friends anymore because I hate watching them get drunk.
    What am I to do???


Comments

  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 81,310 CMod ✭✭✭✭coffee_cake


    invite them to the cinema/bowling/etc
    if they wont go, find new friends or socialise with them daytime only


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,556 ✭✭✭✭AckwelFoley


    Kudos to you for abstaining.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    And see for 17 - 18 year olds, things just aren't cool when drink isn't involved. And daytime at this point is usually reserved for studying. (Mocks in 2 weeks)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,103 ✭✭✭estebancambias


    You seem like my kind of person!!!!! I never really cared though going out where drink was involved, even though it was annoying at certain times.

    You could get some straight edge mates....


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Straight Edge- I have one straight edge acquaintance, and my problem there is that it seems to me that she just substitutes violence for drink! Which isn't for me either! In saying that, I do like the music...


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  • Registered Users Posts: 12,556 ✭✭✭✭AckwelFoley


    that it seems to me that she just substitutes violence for drink
    !

    oh, ill have a slice of that please.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,103 ✭✭✭estebancambias


    I like the music, but I'm not so into the scene. Some of the people are so stuck up their own ass about abstaining. To be honest I am at a point where it would be more difficult for me to drink.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    It's a tad irritating when she starts the ''I'm gonna kick some drunken ass at this gig at the weekend''
    Calm down there love. But yeah this drinking business is awful annoying. I'm one of only 2 people my age I know who doesn't drink!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 429 ✭✭jph100


    fair play to ya for stickin to ur guns.

    i was kinda in the same boat a few years back except ur mates sound 'worse' than mine were.

    if ur still in school,i presume ur too young to go to pubs regularly. when u+ur mates are old enough, the buzz surroundin underage knacker drinkin will stop cos u can now go to pubs easily so it will die down.

    thats from what ive seen myself


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Thanks and I am old enough to go to a pub and I have, but I still just get really annoyed watching them!


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 429 ✭✭jph100


    Thanks and I am old enough to go to a pub and I have, but I still just get really annoyed watching them!

    ah sorry! when u said ur mates go on big sessions and u were doin ur mocks i presumed it was underageknacker drinkin!

    u cud organise things for urself and them like goin to cinema or somethin to provide them with an alternative to goin to the pub


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Yeah, have tried that, but the only way that they go to the cinema is if it's then followed by the pub!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 429 ✭✭jph100


    Yeah, have tried that, but the only way that they go to the cinema is if it's then followed by the pub!

    well u cud grab a bite to eat before or after the film. that way u will have ur few hours craic with them before they go off to get locked while u have an early night!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Yeah well I mean I'll try this weekend... it gets a bit awkward with birthdays etc too


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 42 liljenny


    if they dont respect the fact that you dont want to drink then there not very good friends, chat with some new people in school or clubs and find some people on the same wave lenght as you


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    I've tried that, and I think I'm just not a very outgoing guy! And as I said, I know of one other person my age who doesn't drink at the moment!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 42 liljenny


    i'll drink the odd time but alot of my friends were mad drinkers and being 18/19 there can be alot of pressure put on you to drink but real friends will wnat to hang out with you without alcohol


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,770 ✭✭✭Bottle_of_Smoke


    Don't give out to them for drinking. Don't complain that they're drinking. They know it's not good for them, they just like being drunk.

    I get a bit of stick as I've stopped drinking but my friend who's never drank doesn't/ He has a strong character. He also doesn't feel like he's missing out on anything (which I'm sensing you might)

    If you act like you don't care, which you really shouldn't, you'll be accepted & no one will care that you're not drinking. You'll be saving a fortune too.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    You should work on enjoying yourself when your out instead of focusing on being upset by your friends drinking.
    You can relax and be less shy around drunk people, because if you something stupid they likely won't recall.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Don't give out to them for drinking. Don't complain that they're drinking. They know it's not good for them, they just like being drunk.

    I get a bit of stick as I've stopped drinking but my friend who's never drank doesn't/ He has a strong character. He also doesn't feel like he's missing out on anything (which I'm sensing you might)

    If you act like you don't care, which you really shouldn't, you'll be accepted & no one will care that you're not drinking. You'll be saving a fortune too.
    It's not that I think I'm missing out on anything, it's just hard to have friends when whenever they go out it's to get pissed, and you don't drink. I don't give out to them anymore because I know that won't make a difference! Maybe I just do need to loosen up around drinkers.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 186 ✭✭NonDrinkersClub


    It's not that I think I'm missing out on anything, it's just hard to have friends when whenever they go out it's to get pissed, and you don't drink. I don't give out to them anymore because I know that won't make a difference! Maybe I just do need to loosen up around drinkers.

    Giving out to them will not stop them - it's an age thing. It's good that you've already realised that :) The older they get the more they'll chill out, trust me.

    You need to pinpoint when it is that they go from being grand to blinding drunk and then maybe you could call it a night. That's usually late enough anyway so you're there for about 90% of the fun.

    It might be a good idea for you to join a few clubs and make some additional friends who are more on your wavelength. You don't have to ditch your old friends by any means...the more the merrier I always say!

    Here's some ideas for stuff you could do http://www.nondrinkersgroup.com/activities.html. I'm gonna be organising some events in Dublin soon so maybe you could come along?

    Maybe if your friends see you out and about trying new things they might like to join in.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Yeah that'd be great! Nice website too, thanks for the link, I hadn't seen it before!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,348 ✭✭✭ricey


    bluewolf wrote: »
    invite them to the cinema/bowling/etc
    if they wont go, find new friends or socialise with them daytime only

    well said :)

    Thats good advice id take it if i were yo bro.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,910 ✭✭✭thusspakeblixa


    Thanks a million to everyone who posted here. It's been a great help, I'm actually happier in myself now, even if those eejits are still the same


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