Really Successful Talentless Tossers

Supechicgeek · 30-11-2007 07:26PM

That knob on ITV who does the Jerry Springer style show...Cant even remember his name - oh Jeremy Kyle....

That lesbian Nun ex Big Brother Winner/Looser .......Anna tingamegig (and her fellow counterparts on that diabolical "Afternoon show"...) and anyone who appears on any RTE show ...

Danni Minogue ! Has a successful career with no talent whatsoever..

Tommy Tiernan who's only talent is being the loudest annoying ****** in the room...

Linda Martin , Brendan O Connor etc..

Westlife.Boyzone,.....Ronan Keating being the King!!!!

I better leave it at that - As I havent even ventured a thought outside Ireland !!! And there are millions more......

ParkRunner · 30-11-2007 07:30PM

I'd love to be rich and talentless, there'd be no pressure. My boss in work is absolutely brutal, he hasnt got a clue and yet he's paid about 4 times more than me. While it breaks my heart I have to admire how he can get away with it.

justfortherecor · 30-11-2007 07:54PM

Bob Dylan??
Agreed, his live performances in recent years have left a lot to be desired, but to call him 'talentless' is way off the mark.

How can a talentless person write these sort of lyrics:

Then take me disappearin' through the smoke rings of my mind,
Down the foggy ruins of time, far past the frozen leaves,
The haunted, frightened trees, out to the windy beach,
Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow.
Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free,
Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands,
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves,
Let me forget about today until tomorrow.

Simply stunning. There's plenty of other successful musicians out there who certainly aren't capable of this sort of writing.

peasant · 30-11-2007 08:53PM

Bob Dylan is a great singer, songwriter, performer, instrumentalist

What bugs me about him and his fame is that there are many more good songwriters that had the courtesy to stick what they do best and not to force all their other "talents" on the public ...yet he gets all the hype.

Listen to this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1xZNo10lQI

If this wasn't the man himself, but some random busker he'd get pelted with rotten eggs for ruining the song

Nailz · 30-11-2007 09:06PM

Lewis Walsh, he's talentless and a bollox! There I was at the Eagles concert with me woman. It was unreal hi, it was black'idin! And anyway he was sitting across from us and she liked Boyzone and all that shite so I tryed to introduce her to him and the humpy who're ignored us! I felt like lacin' 'em, but you know the gobshite would sue me or something like that. Instead I brought her to Keith Duffy, nice lad and showed an interest unlike that other hefer! BTW, Walsh was fond of a supp, he'd drink it out of your wheletens!

Terry · 30-11-2007 09:18PM

Has anyone mentioned Pete Doherty yet?
Mediocre musician who hooked up with an aging supermodel and got wasted on various drugs.

tampopo · 30-11-2007 09:19PM

Lesbian Ex nun Anna Nolan went up in my opinion and showed a TALENT for leaving that dire Afternoon Show programme.

Nailz · 30-11-2007 09:22PM

Terry wrote: »

Has anyone mentioned Pete Doherty yet?
Mediocre musician who hooked up with an aging supermodel and got wasted on various drugs.

Ah shite! Forgot about him! But Walsh was the 1st thing to come to mind...

Oswald Osbourne · 30-11-2007 09:47PM

ROCKMAN wrote: »

That fat gay guy from Airport

George Kennedy?

He's a great actor.

I'd nominate Andrew Maxwell. The only thing I find funny about him is thoughts of the beating I'd give him if I ever ran into the little manchild.

LivingDeadGirl · 30-11-2007 10:09PM

Nicole Richie.

Is starving yourself really a talent?

Terry · 30-11-2007 10:12PM

Oswald Osbourne wrote: »

George Kennedy? He's a great actor.

I'd nominate Andrew Maxwell. The only thing I find funny about him is thoughts of the beating I'd give him if I ever ran into the little manchild.

Really?
I think he's great on the panel.
In fact, he's the funniest one there in my opinion.

Anyway, this isn't really about personal taste. It's about people like Jordan, Jade Goody and their ilk. People with no discernable talent, who only made something of themsel;ves by exploiting the media and idiotic tv viewers.

I'd add Sinead O'Connor to the list, but I like "Mandinka".

OPENROAD · 30-11-2007 10:19PM

chopperbyrne wrote: »

Several members of these groups are quite talented singers.

Gary Barlow is clearly a talented songwriter too.

Yup Gary Barlow has made an absolute fortune from songwriting and has four Ivor Novellos, not bad that.

Driver 8 · 30-11-2007 10:20PM

C'mon now, go and listen to Time Out of Mind, Love and Theft and Modern Times, and tell me Bob Dylan should retire. His voice suits his current material to a tee, I'll take Bob over a "note perfect" mariah carey performance any day.

Like A Rolling Stone, My Back Pages, Knockin' on Heavens Door, All Along The Watchtower, Blowin' in the Wind, Lovesick, With God On Our Side, Mr.Tambourine Man, When I Paint My Masterpiece?

The furthest thing from talentless my friends.

Binomate · 30-11-2007 10:22PM

its me. im da Really Successful Talentless Tosser in da op

Belfafter · 30-11-2007 10:44PM

Have to stick up for Mr Zimmerman here - he is the most influential singer/songwriter alive today,maybe ever.
Sure you may not like his music but in no way is he , talentless? -def not.
His lyrics are so scarily deep that there is really no one else out there in nearly 50 years to match him.
"may you climb a ladder to the stars,
may you step on every rung
and may you stay
f o r e v e r young........" (forever young)

As for talentless tossers well what about the leader of the "free world" - george dubya gets my vote everytime if I didnt he would probably steal it anyway:(

Terry · 30-11-2007 10:59PM

Driver 8 wrote: »

C'mon now, go and listen to Time Out of Mind, Love and Theft and Modern Times, and tell me Bob Dylan should retire. His voice suits his current material to a tee, I'll take Bob over a "note perfect" mariah carey performance any day.

Like A Rolling Stone, My Back Pages, Knockin' on Heavens Door, All Along The Watchtower, Blowin' in the Wind, Lovesick, With God On Our Side, Mr.Tambourine Man, When I Paint My Masterpiece?

The furthest thing from talentless my friends.

I'd listen to this guy.
He obviously knows good music.

The walls are built up, stone by stone,
The fields divided one by one.
And the train conductor says
take a break driver 8, driver 8 take a break
Weve been on this shift too long

And the train conductor says
take a break driver 8, driver 8 take a break
We can reach our destination, but were still a ways away

I saw a treehouse on the outskirts of the farm.
The power lines have floaters so the airplanes wont get snagged.
Bells are ringing through the town again,
Children look up, all they hear is sky-blue, bells ringing

And the train conductor says
take a break driver 8, driver 8 take a break
We can reach our destination, but were still a ways away

Way to shield the hated heat.
Way to put myself to sleep.
Way to shield the hated heat.
Way to put myself, my children to sleep.

He piloted this song in a plane like that one.
She is selling faith on the go tell crusade.
Locomotive 8, southern crescent, hear the bells ring again.
Field of wheat is looking thin

And the train conductor says
take a break driver 8, driver 8 take a break
Weve been on this shift too long.
And the train conductor says
take a break driver 8, driver 8 take a break
We can reach our destination, but were still a ways away

cornbb · 30-11-2007 11:05PM

Dylan did write some great tunes (although he can't sing/play to save his life) and he invented a whole new type of music ("singer/songwriters"). But this means he was responsible for the likes of Mundy, Damien Rice, Paddy Casey et all and should really be punished quite severely.

Hail 2 Da Chimp · 30-11-2007 11:10PM

Terry wrote: »

Has anyone mentioned Pete Doherty yet?
Mediocre musician who hooked up with an aging supermodel and got wasted on various drugs.

Can't believe I missed old Petie... Although in fairness he had the right idea.

jebuz · 30-11-2007 11:18PM

Some of the suggestions here are really ridiculous, and there seems to be way too much personal opinion, i mean westlife can obviously sing, so can ronan keating, I don't like them as much as the next guy but they've got talent, thats why they're famous. Gary Barlow is a good songwriter, and Woody Allen like him or not, he's not talentless. Please people, we're looking for talentless! I don't know how Bob Dylan could even be mentioned, sure he can't sing to good, but probably a lot better than everyone here, and even so, his songwriting record speaks for itself.

Jade Goody, Derek Mooney, Brendan Kilkenny, agreed!

Louis Walsh?? i dont think he claims to be talented

peasant · 30-11-2007 11:44PM

Belfafter wrote: »

His lyrics are so scarily deep that there is really no one else out there in nearly 50 years to match him.

You know why his lyrics are so "scarily deep"?

Because he spends most of his time so deep up his own arse, its' scary

That man is a universe unto himself.

And whenever people want to relate to him, he usually just fecks off into another one of his mysterious "phases" that he goes through.

Most of his "songs" can't even be sung properly, because he always messes up the rythm / verse in there somewhere ..so you either have to swallow the words or feck up the music ...or both ..as he does

But enough of Dylan bashing ...he's great ...really !

jahalpin · 30-11-2007 11:54PM

Has anyone mentioned Jonathan Rhys Meyers yet?

He is the most talentless actor that I have ever had the misfortune to watch. He is so wooden and that accent he puts on is so annoying

el diablo · 01-12-2007 01:58AM

deswalsh wrote: »

Westlife, Boyzone,Take That et al - boybands and their female versions thereof.
talentless, tossers, but bloody successful.

Daniel O'Donnell.

Don't get me started on westlife and Daniel 'O Donnell. Theses are certainly top of the "talentless tossers" pile. As far as I know, all they do are cover versions.:mad:

Latchy · 01-12-2007 02:05AM

Fran cosgrove ? although he seems a nice enough guy (on tv ) apart from being in a relationship ith a member of atomic kitten ,a DJ to boot and a contestant on IACGMOOH ,what else has he done to earn title ' celebrity' ? Perhaps i missed out on somthing , Was he famous in ireland before he was on UK tv ?

el diablo · 01-12-2007 02:14AM

Nailz wrote: »

BTW, Walsh was fond of a supp, he'd drink it out of your wheletens!

he'd drink it out of your wha?

what are wheletens? is it Cavan slang or something?

Lands Leaving · 01-12-2007 02:21AM

Has anyone said Jackass or dirty Sanchez yet? Famous for what, hitting yourself with things, or stapling your bits to a table? Fcuk off you evolutionary mistakes.

el diablo · 01-12-2007 02:23AM

Lands Leaving wrote: »

Has anyone said Jackass or dirty Sanchez yet? Famous for what, hitting yourself with things, or stapling your bits to a table? Fcuk off you evolutionary mistakes.

well I'd certainly agree on Dirty Sanchez. never figured out how those brainless inbreds got on TV.

Sonnenblumen · 01-12-2007 02:24AM

No talent? So what! No money well that makes you a tosser.

Fun arguing about who has/has not talent, but don't knock the triers (and there's certainly not enough).

Seth Brundle · 01-12-2007 02:32AM

Martin Cullen TD

I Shot J.R. · 01-12-2007 02:49AM

1) Irish PR girls passed off as "models" who get into the papers every day promoting random crap.
Heidi Klum is a real model, I don't think she'd be standing in Stephens Green in July in a bikini and a santa hat with an ice-cream promoting Budget Travels poxy Christmas Sun catalogue.

2) Amanda Brunker - Having big tits and being moderate looking almost 20 years ago must take lots of training and dedication to get a weekly spread in a paper.

3) Ulrikka Jonsson - 4 kids, 4 fathers, dates gob****es, made quids....pissed myself when I heard the NOTW had dropped her!

4) Caroline Morahan - nice tits, get over yourself.

Rant over,
have a nice weekend all :-)

DavyD_83 · 01-12-2007 03:20AM

Dunno if they were already mentioned, but just in case they were left out:
The Thrills!!
:mad::mad::mad:

Really Successful Talentless Tossers

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