Advertisement
Help Keep Boards Alive. Support us by going ad free today. See here: https://subscriptions.boards.ie/.
https://www.boards.ie/group/1878-subscribers-forum

Private Group for paid up members of Boards.ie. Join the club.
Hi all, please see this major site announcement: https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058427594/boards-ie-2026

Are you bum? What do bums do?

  • 23-11-2007 05:13PM
    #1
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭


    So, i finished up work today and now i am officially a man of leisure...

    I have a little over a month before i head off to Canada for a year. So what i want to know is, what do bums do in their spare time, or... just time i guess.

    I think the novelty of sitting on my ass all day on the interweb and watching t.v will wear off fairly soon. I was thinking i could make use of that gym membership and go sit in the jacuzzi and sauna for a few hours of the day, what do ya think? I could always masturbate furiously?

    My god, the decisions a man has to make in the modern world:)


«1

Comments

  • #2
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    Don't masturbate too early in the day, you need something to look forward too.

    Also, the arrival of the day's post is a highlight.


  • #3
    quarryman
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,498 ✭✭✭quarryman


    world of warcraft.

    don't expect to catch your flight though.


  • #4
    ibh
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,725 ✭✭✭ibh


    quarryman wrote: »
    world of warcraft.

    don't expect to catch your flight though.

    Or ever find a girlfriend....


  • #5
    ScumLord
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 28,787 ✭✭✭✭ScumLord


    Grab yourself a can of scrumpy jack and head down to your local train/bus station and start begging for money. Wear a suit it will give you the edge over the other bums.


  • #6
    Im A Hotmail
    Closed Accounts Posts: 29 ✭Im A Hotmail


    quarryman wrote: »
    world of warcraft.

    don't expect to catch your flight though.

    Internet bums play mmorpgs, real bums drink on the streets.. I'd go for the latter, you'll have some sort of social life and you won't be obese.


  • Advertisement
  • #7
    Im A Hotmail
    Closed Accounts Posts: 29 ✭Im A Hotmail


    ibh wrote: »
    Or ever find a girlfriend....

    High five!


  • #8
    monkey tennis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 583 ✭✭✭monkey tennis


    The-Rigger wrote: »
    Don't masturbate too early in the day, you need something to look forward too.

    Why do it once when you can do it twice? :confused:


  • #9
    halfinch
    Closed Accounts Posts: 192 ✭✭halfinch


    make some friends with your local drunk....bound to get a few good stories outta it


  • #10
    ibh
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,725 ✭✭✭ibh


    Im A Hotmail wrote: »
    High five!

    Woo Hoo


  • #11
    One Cold Hand
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,391 ✭✭✭One Cold Hand


    ScumLord wrote: »
    Grab yourself a can of scrumpy jack and head down to your local train/bus station and start begging for money. Wear a suit it will give you the edge over the other bums.

    In my limited experience in this field I've found that me wearing a suit actually gives them the edge. The more respectable I look the less likely I am to get money.


  • Advertisement
  • #12
    uglyjohn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 747 ✭✭✭uglyjohn


    its actually quite hectic being a bum, i find the day practically fills itself.
    the internet is good, you can also catch up on your reading. go for lunchtime pints with other bum friends. read the paper over a coffee.
    its a good life, doesnt pay well though.


  • #13
    irishfeller
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 130 ✭✭irishfeller


    Spend the day emailing your friends who are at work updating them of your activities:

    i.e.
    'How's work? I am watching countdown at the moment'
    or
    'How's work? I am walking round the house in the nip at the moment'


  • #14
    Latchy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 21,190 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Buy some roaning keating cds in bargin basement and take them to Canada .Give them out as presents,Some people will listen to any ol ****e and wont know the difference :D


  • #15
    azezil
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,397 ✭✭✭✭azezil


    Government warning: I give you cancer.


  • #16
    RxQueen
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,821 ✭✭✭RxQueen


    feed the pigeons! somebody gots to do it


  • #17
    humanji
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,976 ✭✭✭✭humanji


    Yes, I am bum, thanks. In fact I'd go as far as saying I'm very bum, but only as long as the mood takes me.


  • #18
    MOH
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,477 ✭✭✭MOH


    Pick random people on the street and follow them until you get bored/hit/arrested/lucky


  • #19
    Terry
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,073 ✭✭✭✭Terry


    This bum spends most of his time modding AH.
    I also sleep a lot.
    I do one or two small jobs a week. These can vary from hanging a shower door to removing a virus from someones PC. This keeps me in beer money.

    In about 10 minutes I will be going for a couple of evening pints with friends.


  • #20
    Jesus Wept
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,243 ✭✭✭✭Jesus Wept


    azezil wrote: »
    You could always vote for me, it'll make your life better, guaranteed!

    you're bugging the sh1t out of me now.

    You've started multiple threads and spammed loads of others.
    Take a break.


  • #21
    echosound
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 773 ✭✭✭echosound


    irishfeller wrote: »
    Spend the day emailing your friends who are at work updating them of your activities:

    i.e.
    'How's work? I am watching countdown at the moment'
    or
    'How's work? I am walking round the house in the nip at the moment'

    Great pastime actually, always guaranteed to get their blood pressure rising.

    Another nice one is to e-mail them at 11am or so, with a "yawn, just up now, was it cold this morning at 7am when you got up, I wasn't awake to find out".

    I actually tend to start the day by thinking about all the things I could do - go out for a walk and take a few photos perhaps, do some exercise, visit some friends who are also bum, odd jobs round the house, etc., and by evening time I am left wondering where the day went and why I didn't do any of the above.


  • Advertisement
  • #22
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    Ok guys, some good ideas. But it's been 3 days now, i've gained about 26lbs due to entertaining myself via comfort eating and no amount of masturbation is shifting it!! That and my post count has doubled in this time. I have until the 28th of December until i actually HAVE to leave the house. I don't know if i can make it!!!

    I need some more ideas people, come on now brainstorm brainstorm!!!


  • #23
    Tha Gopher
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,799 ✭✭✭Tha Gopher


    Out of curiousity why are some of you out of work, and are you claiming dole?


  • #24
    MagicMarker
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    I am emmigrating at the end of December, and decided to leave work a couple of weeks earlier, was supposed to leave mid dec. And no i'm not on the dole.


  • #25
    Pherekydes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 16,339 ✭✭✭✭Pherekydes


    Buy a cauliflower! Trim all the green and leave it on the worktop. You'll notice that it eventually goes grey and then black. Throw it out before it turns into a gooey mess on your worktop.

    Now imagine your brain is the cauli. It's already at the grey stage. Lying on the couch watching TV, vegetating in AH or drinking too much and your brain will skip right over the black stage.

    Do something before it's too late!

    Now buy a banana...


  • #26
    Rhyme
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,561 ✭✭✭Rhyme


    MOH wrote: »
    Pick random people on the street and follow them until you get bored/hit/arrested/lucky
    Do this. Buy a newspaper and hide behind it at critical intervals for maximum effect. Cut a hole in the newspaper for added fun.

    If you have a trenchcoat and sunglasses, wear them.


  • #27
    Gavin "shels"
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,990 ✭✭✭✭Gavin "shels"


    Rent a van, get a few a your bum mates to go on a trip around diiferent places in Ireland and just drink for the few days.:D


  • #28
    Sonnenblumen
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,834 ✭✭✭Sonnenblumen


    MagicMarker wrote: »
    So, i finished up work today and now i am officially a man of leisure...

    I have a little over a month before i head off to Canada for a year. So what i want to know is, what do bums do in their spare time, or... just time i guess.

    I think the novelty of sitting on my ass all day on the interweb and watching t.v will wear off fairly soon. I was thinking i could make use of that gym membership and go sit in the jacuzzi and sauna for a few hours of the day, what do ya think? I could always masturbate furiously?

    My god, the decisions a man has to make in the modern world:)

    Being a man of leisure is hard work, BTW have you tried anal bleaching?


  • #29
    Dave147
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,235 ✭✭✭Dave147


    Go into your nearest PC game store, buy Call of Duty 4 and Football Manager 2008, should keep you going till sometime 2020 :D


  • #30
    rossie1977
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,541 ✭✭✭✭rossie1977


    spend most of your day hanging around stephens green along with 10,000 other people who don't seem to have any jobs to go to


  • Advertisement
  • #31
    leninbenjamin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,983 ✭✭✭leninbenjamin


    get up off your fat lazy arse and do something productive. like going out to buy beer.


Advertisement
Advertisement