Anxiety holding me back.

LegacyUser · 21-10-2007 07:48PM #1

Ok I’m going to keep this pretty short. Basically, for the last few years I’ve had this problem with anxiety, or at least what I think is anxiety. I get worried about things that I shouldn’t worry about which causes things like shortness or breath, inability to concentrate and a feeling of nervousness in my stomach that I cannot really explain.

This happens at pretty random times, although often at times when I feel that I may be late for an appointment or if I’m lost or unsure of my whereabouts. Also it sometimes happens when I’m on my own eg in a hotel room or something like that.

As part of my job my company has asked me to start carrying out training new recruits. This will involve presenting to a number of people (usually 4-5) at a time. The thought of this is ok for me. The problem is when I actually stand up in front of an audience I totally freeze. All the feelings of Anxiety come back again. The shortness or breath and the tension in my stomach.

Is there anything anybody can recommend to me to get over this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? I’m sorry it’s really difficult to describe the feeling that comes over me but if you’ve been through it you will understand, it’s much worse than just nervousness and I have no control over it. I would not describe it as being nervous as I do not feel worried before it but it only hits me when everyones eyes are on me.

I suppose its also worth mentioning that I sometimes get a bit down in myself although I’m not sure if it could be classed as depression. Although my general mood is actually very good at the moment and has been for some time. Is it possible that this is a factor?

Any help or advice would be much appreciated. I feel like if I could get through the first few presentations then I would never again have a problem with it. As I said, I may not be explaining too well so feel free to ask any questions.

Thanks.

Nevyn · 21-10-2007 10:20PM

If you are having Anxiety attacks then talk to your dr about them.

mikemac · 21-10-2007 10:28PM

Always smile (but not like a lunatic). If you smile at the new hires then they will smile back and you're halfway to getting their attention

Sure they are probably more nervous than you.

I don't normally advise drugs but there is some drug our year-head gave us during our leaving cert. You take a drop and you're instantly calm. Don't know the name but any chemist could tell you.

Seriously, presentations aren't hard. All about practice.
And hey, if the Taoiseach can constantly stutter and still get high approval ratings then don't beat yourself up if your technique isn't perfect

MonkeyTennis · 21-10-2007 10:46PM

this is just all about experience. I used to give presentations and my voice used to dry up and id just go so red about the face it was unreal.

After a while I eventually just had to say 'come on!' You know what you are talking about ..just tell them.

Top Tips

Pick a person in the room and deliver to them. You can sweep around the room to get everyones attention and eye contact as you go

Drink water!

Go slow. Everyone tends to blast through presentations due to nerves. Go slower than you would normally talk, it gives you time to think and put your 'crowd' at ease.

Drink water!

Smile, yeah not the loony type:D but even force a smile to yourself it releases endorphines that will make you relax .

As for the depression.. everyone feels low everyso often but if its getting in the way talk to someone. Its the most normal thing in the world and dont for a minute think that you are alone with it. I suffer from winter blues something awful but I know it. If you acknowledge it and dont let it sit inside you, its much more manageable.

Hope that helps..even a little!

hupyago · 21-10-2007 11:22PM

I have similar problems so thanks for bringing it up
I looked up wikihow (great resource)
heres what I came upon

http://www.wikihow.com/Beat-Anxiety-About-Speaking
http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Anxiety
When you feel anxiety coming on, tuck both your thumbs inside your fists. (Try it now.) This helps you breathe, which helps you control the onset of the attack. (It also works for asthma and stuffy heads. It's weird, but it really does work.)

LegacyUser · 23-10-2007 10:03PM

hey. I have suffered with the exact problem myself. I suffere so badly with anxiety and panic attacks. i went to counselling and it didnt help. I finally went to a doctor and she prescribed me with lexapro. The great thing is that it is not addictive. It has so many advantages. such as increase in confidence, lack of social phobia, very little worry, a sense of calm, no panic attacks etc etc. I am only on week 2 and noticing the benifits so far. If you really feel you want to go on meds then speak to your doctor and let them explain the pros and cons. to be honest the only con for me was the nausea and that went after 3 days. best of luck with whatever decision you make

Unreg_i150881 wrote: »

Ok I’m going to keep this pretty short. Basically, for the last few years I’ve had this problem with anxiety, or at least what I think is anxiety. I get worried about things that I shouldn’t worry about which causes things like shortness or breath, inability to concentrate and a feeling of nervousness in my stomach that I cannot really explain.

This happens at pretty random times, although often at times when I feel that I may be late for an appointment or if I’m lost or unsure of my whereabouts. Also it sometimes happens when I’m on my own eg in a hotel room or something like that.

As part of my job my company has asked me to start carrying out training new recruits. This will involve presenting to a number of people (usually 4-5) at a time. The thought of this is ok for me. The problem is when I actually stand up in front of an audience I totally freeze. All the feelings of Anxiety come back again. The shortness or breath and the tension in my stomach.

Is there anything anybody can recommend to me to get over this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? I’m sorry it’s really difficult to describe the feeling that comes over me but if you’ve been through it you will understand, it’s much worse than just nervousness and I have no control over it. I would not describe it as being nervous as I do not feel worried before it but it only hits me when everyones eyes are on me.

I suppose its also worth mentioning that I sometimes get a bit down in myself although I’m not sure if it could be classed as depression. Although my general mood is actually very good at the moment and has been for some time. Is it possible that this is a factor?

Any help or advice would be much appreciated. I feel like if I could get through the first few presentations then I would never again have a problem with it. As I said, I may not be explaining too well so feel free to ask any questions.

Thanks.

LegacyUser · 24-10-2007 11:20AM

To siglodiablito:

>>I finally went to a doctor and she prescribed me with lexapro. The great thing is that it is not addictive.>>

I've suffered anxiety for most of my life. Three months ago I decided to do something about it. I went to the doctor who referred me to a Psychiatrist as she felt I would benefit from a couple of sessions.

I've been to two sessions, its going well. He identified that I also suffer from OCD. He wants me to go on 10mg of lexapro. I have a big problem with this. Im worried I'll be like a zombie, Im worried I'll get addicted, im worried I wont be the same when I come off it etc etc. Of course, all these worries are apart of the overall anxiety and OCD.

Would it be possible to discuss this with you ?? I have not started taking it yet.

muppetkiller · 24-10-2007 03:18PM

This is actually an issue that has only just started happening with me recently.
I went to HR in my job and VHI offer an employee assistance program. They recommended a 8 week Counseling session (paid for by vhi). I found it to be very good.. really focuses on your breathing and to try and keep your body in a relaxed state. I learned the technique in two sessions the rest I just went to get a half day each week lol.

It hasn't taken the problem away but it has helped me give presentations.
I am still very nervous before and during but I can still do them.

The only bit of hope I can give you is that it's so common don't think you're a freak. The other thing is knowing 100% what your about to present is half the battle too. There's a good book called 'Feel the fear but do it anyway' can't remember who wrote it but it addresses the same issues.
Best of luck..

Rhiannon14 · 24-10-2007 03:21PM

muppetkiller wrote: »

The only bit of hope I can give you is that it's so common don't think you're a freak. The other thing is knowing 100% what your about to present is half the battle too. There's a good book called 'Feel the fear but do it anyway' can't remember who wrote it but it addresses the same issues.
Best of luck..

Susan Jeffers is the author. Good stuff.

LegacyUser · 24-10-2007 07:38PM

To be honest with you, you shouldnt have a problem with going on lexapro. for me it was a last resort. it doesnt make you feel like a zombie at all. it does though take a while to show its full effects. people around you will start noticing the effects on yourself. ill give you an example about me. like you i would get so anxious about something such as going into a shop or going out with friends. but now i just feel like its not such a worry anymore with the meds. there are so many people on this medication and it is very safe. there are little if no withdrawal effects as the drug stays in your body for 3 days . your doctor will lower your dose to 5 mg after about 6 months and then you will gently come off it. therapy is really recommended with this as you have to change your lifestyle to suit the anxiety. if you just stick to tablets forever you will never get better.
any morew questions feel free to ask.

Unreg1975 wrote: »

To siglodiablito:

>>I finally went to a doctor and she prescribed me with lexapro. The great thing is that it is not addictive.>>

I've suffered anxiety for most of my life. Three months ago I decided to do something about it. I went to the doctor who referred me to a Psychiatrist as she felt I would benefit from a couple of sessions.

I've been to two sessions, its going well. He identified that I also suffer from OCD. He wants me to go on 10mg of lexapro. I have a big problem with this. Im worried I'll be like a zombie, Im worried I'll get addicted, im worried I wont be the same when I come off it etc etc. Of course, all these worries are apart of the overall anxiety and OCD.

Would it be possible to discuss this with you ?? I have not started taking it yet.

LegacyUser · 25-10-2007 09:06AM

Thank you for replying to me.

For me I too feel like this is a last resort. It cant get any worse so I HAVE to go on this to sort this out. Its getting to a stage where even paying at the till for something in a shop is making me anxious. I was walking down grafton street yesterday and I started getting that dizzy panic feeling, this isnt normal.

How long are you on lexapro now?? Or have you came off it ?

Not sure if Im allowed to post my email address but I'd really like to ask you some more questions offline if thats possible?? Maybe the mods can confirm If I can do this ??

Marksie · 25-10-2007 09:54AM

Unreg1975 wrote: »

Not sure if Im allowed to post my email address but I'd really like to ask you some more questions offline if thats possible?? Maybe the mods can confirm If I can do this ??

No I would strongly advise against it.

Not a good idea if you think about it.

Register then ask the OP to do the same and PM.

kmick · 25-10-2007 10:05AM

I was going to say I used to get the same feeling at meetings and I helped myself by

1) Being very well prepared before I go in.
2) Having a large glass of water with 2 squirts of Rescue Remedy (available over the counter in pharmacys and health shops) in there.
3) Watching my breathing. I noticed that my breathing got all out of whack when i got nervous so big deep breaths to try and normalise beforehand and just being concious of the breath in and out. Slowing it down if possible.

But I never got it going down Grafton street so you seem to be a bit more acute than i was. Do you drink regularily. If so then that is aggravating your problem.

LegacyUser · 25-10-2007 10:22AM

Thanks Marksie, I am registered but I wanted to go unreg for this.

Kmick, thanks for posting. I tried rescue remedy a while ago, didnt do much for me.

My breathing can be quiet irregular due to the fact I have panic attacks on a daily basis.

I cut the drink out 10 months ago as the hangover aggravated the anxiety something horrible.

My next session with the Phycharist is in 2 weeks, I'll get another prescription off him and start the lexapro. This terrifies me but I've exhausted every other avenue.

Tonic07 · 25-10-2007 12:38PM

You might want to give a herbal drug called St. Johns Wort a go. Lot's of info on the web. However ask your doctor about them before using as I think they may interfere with other medication if your on any.
I tried them for a while and are great for anxiety and the likes.

JACK BE NIMBLE · 25-10-2007 12:43PM

[PHP]Thanks Marksie, I am registered but I wanted to go unreg for this.

Kmick, thanks for posting. I tried rescue remedy a while ago, didnt do much for me.

My breathing can be quiet irregular due to the fact I have panic attacks on a daily basis.

I cut the drink out 10 months ago as the hangover aggravated the anxiety something horrible.

My next session with the Phycharist is in 2 weeks, I'll get another prescription off him and start the lexapro. This terrifies me but I've exhausted every other avenue.[/PHP]

If you want to rid yourelf of panic attacks you need to take a look at this site,i know there is an awful lot of bs and money racketting websites out there but this one has helped me more than any other avenue, its free advice from a guy who probably like you and me has suffered with this thing for quite some time and how he eradicated his panic attcks, worked for me!

JACK BE NIMBLE · 25-10-2007 12:45PM

Doh.. Forgot to include website address, sorry - here it is www.panicend.com

Marksie · 25-10-2007 01:04PM

Tonic07 wrote: »

You might want to give a herbal drug called St. Johns Wort a go. Lot's of info on the web. However ask your doctor about them before using as I think they may interfere with other medication if your on any.
I tried them for a while and are great for anxiety and the likes.

In Ireland thay are prescription only, though i believe its over the counter in the UK.

Have a word with your doctor about the contraindications before using though.

Miss Fluff · 25-10-2007 02:36PM

Hey there OP, send me a PM

LegacyUser · 25-10-2007 02:59PM

Miss Fluff

I sent you a PM

Marksie · 25-10-2007 03:35PM

siglodiablito : I know you mean well, but please do not ask for personal email addresses in thread, i have not approved the post

Pachanga · 25-10-2007 03:38PM

siglodiablito, send me a PM

LegacyUser · 25-10-2007 05:32PM

my story is quiet amazing...im in early 20's and recently suffered a huge blow to my life. i used to be a typical lad, out every weekend, girls every night and just so happy in life. then i fell in love with a girl. she told me she was leaving the country which broke my heart. anyway got drunk one nite and thought if i kissed someone else it'd force me to end it with her and id no longer be cursed with the anxiety i was experiencing about her leaving. anyways stuff happened with a random girl on the nite out wen i was drunk but once she touched me, i freaked out and ran out of the house and had the worst experience of my life....i had a nervous breakdown.
everywhere i looked reminded me of what i had done(cheated on girlfriend) for example every human i saw on the street reminded me of cheating, anything i heard on the radio or tv reminded me of cheating, i developed what i now understand to be OCD as a result of my anxiety.
i spent two months telling no1 about what was going on in my head,not even my girlfriend. basically for those two months i wanted to kill myself, spent everyday looked in my room taking valium, weed , sleeping tablets etc. to ease the pain. cant explain the pain i felt cos it was so so bad. felt like a heart attack that lasted two months and my muscles constantly tenced up due to the immense strain on my nervous system. ate two slices of toast each day cos thats all i could eat and lost 4 stone in 2 months. remember not only could i talk to anyone cos i was embassed bout what i was experienceing but also i cud not tell my girlfiend cos i thought shed leave me if she knew id cheated.
id almost made my mind up that suicide was the only option left but before i was going to finish it, i decided to tell all to my girlfriend before i did it....
eventually told my girlfriend(u cant imagine how i felt doing this) and once she saw how i was she immediately threw her arms round me and promised shed stay with me. (i love her so much!!!)
had to move back home with my parents for two months cos i was so bad i cudnt work, go out, cook, anything. once home my parents took me under their wings. i went to my family doctor and was put on 30 mg of lexapro a day and referred to a CBT clinic (cognitive behavioural therapy). the results i achieved with CBT counselling were unbelievable(and the lexapro!) and im now 90% recovered.ive been to hell and back and unless uve suffered as bad as i have then u cant imagine what i went through, 1000 times worse than when my close friend died thats how bad this was for me.
this whole brakdown happened six months ago and if ud ask me the day before if i had anxiety, ocd or depression i wud have laughed in your face because i had the perfect life, money, friends, girls, the dream really and the next day i was suicidal. no matter how bad u are u will be fixed... in short, listen to no1 especially hypnosis or anything like that. once this hits u go straight to your parents, the brought u into the world so the have to and will want to fix u. then go straight to a doctor and tell them u want CBT. its a miracle! oh and get the drugs u need, lexapro, sleeping tablet, etc (weed really helped me!)wud love to give my number out so people cud ring me cos i know i have the answer anyone needs, as i said ive been to hell and back.

im 90% recovered and u must all remember what ur going through is not normal so u WILL be normal very soon if u follow my advi9ce i promise!!! love life so much now and my girl! once u recover from where u are now ul start to experience the joys of life once again, smeel the roses and all that! ive just been on holidays!!
if someone can find a way to get in contact, ie, ring me or me ring u please let me know.
oh last thing, watch this documentary, it helped me so much that ive told all my doctors and pyschologists to get their patients to watch it www.moviesfoundonline.com/secret.htm

LegacyUser · 25-10-2007 07:59PM

hi jmjimoijoi. read your post there. great to here your back to your old self. but the thing is that differs from your anxiety and mine is that i do not know where mine spawned from. you used cbt to change the fact that you cheated and blcoked it from your mind. whereas when i did my cbt therapy it was a waste because there were so many possible routes and was not possible to go down everyone. The emdr therapy didnt do much either. it is very strange why your doctor put you on 30mg of lexapro straight away. the usual highest doasge for suicidal people is max 20 mg and the highered as the body gets used to the drug.

Marksie · 25-10-2007 09:39PM

siglodiablito: Please be careful about posting medical advice. Are you qualified to question a doctors dosage regimen?

hupyago · 26-10-2007 12:56AM

I've been through a pretty anxious period
my advice get to work on whats bothering you focusing on solutions rather than problems and physical activity is a great way of using your anxiety positively
meditation can help settle your nerves and your mind
the greatest solution I've found for anxiety or depression is to get busy, out of having everything in your head building up
also I've heard reading good books is a good way to calm ones nerves
writing out whats on your mind can also be a good release or artwork

~Marky~ · 26-10-2007 01:28AM

I have suffered with panic attacks for a few years now as well and have been taking different medication over the years.
When I was taking it I was sleeping all the time and had no energy at all and a few months after I stopped taking it the panic attacks came back which made me really depressed because I wanted to get better so bad.
I did the whole councilling thing as well but I didnt have any results with that at all,if anything it made me feel worse going to it.
So then I decided to look into others things to make me better becuase I didnt want to rely on the tablets to make me feel good.
I started doing accupucture for anxiety and it was truly the best thing I have ever done guys to cure my panic attacks and you feel like a new person after it and listen to a few relaxation cds as well (Dont worry I aint no hippy ha)..it takes about 8 weeks and after that I have had not many problems since

And to the guy who says he smokes weed to make him better it wont help all people that stuff messes up your head and can cause panic attacks.
Thats probably how I ended up a mess smoking that stuff ha

Anxiety holding me back.

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