Gambling Degenerate, do I need help?

phantom_lord wrote:

All my life I've gone to the races and bookies, and was a reasonably successful punter, I had two big catchs in my time, one was a hefty e/w bet on hedgehunter to win the national at 25/1, another was media puzzle at 33/1 for the melbourne cup.

I started playing poker in college about a year and a half ago, just the €5 tournament every tuesday. Nothing major. When I turned 18 I played my first tournament in a casino, just a little freeroll, I came 5th for a ticket to a tournament the week after.

I kept up an interest in the game over the summer. I also had a summer job, working for min wage putting in close to 40 hours a week. Around this time I discovered a local casino, where €1/€2 cash games were played.

Most people bought in for around 200-400euros, so it's a reasonably sized game, for the first week or two I crushed this game. Making more in a night than in a week of my job, I soon quit my job and played full time, 9pm to 7am, sleeping through most of the day. I was a very respected and feared player at this casino.

I through away some of this cash, a good bit playing blackjack and roulette, my typical night started off with losing 50-100 on the house games knowing I'd make it back easily, then blew lots on going out etc. and all the other things that happens when u give a kid lots of money.

One time one of the regulars came in drunk one night and offered me a bet, we would draw two random hands, whoever won got a hundred off the other. Of course I accepted readily.

I then went on a bit of losing streak, the other guys copped onto my game and started giving me less action.

When I moved back to college in dublin I started playing in the fitz card club, I started of with a borrowed 400, I ran this up to 7k over the space of 5-6weeks playing most nights a week, college work went completely out the window, i dind't turn if for lecture. I was making 50+ an hour and having loads of fun. I had nights where I won 1k+. A guy used to slap me on the back everytime he saw me and say that I never lose.

Before I played poker I used to play some blackjack and in between hands on the poker table I'd run over to the roullette table if for example black was on a good run.

I then played two big tournaments, this cost about 600ish, I finished one place outside the money in one and was no where in the other. I went to play cash gmaes and just gambled about 600-700 away on tilt.

I went through a phase where money was completely worthless, on a bus one day talking to some guys in college, one guy mentioned his parents were giving him less money, and how he was 60 euro in debt(!), i nonchalantly told him I'd lost 1200 that weekend, but it was ok cause I'd make 1800 during the week.

I went on a trip to a casino around that time and stayed in a hotel with a guy I met off the internet. A couple of nights in the casino and I was up a couple of thousand. I came back won night and put the cash in my suitcase, when I woke up, the cash and my roomate were gone

When I went to go back to play in the fitz I went on a horrific run of cards, I lost 1k a night a couple of times, I kept getting extemely unlucky, like all-in with a straight in a €800 pot against two guys with two pair and one of the hitting a house etc.

One night I sat down with my last four hundrd of back roll, I was down to fifty but ended up even for the night. The poker ends at seven in the morning, so I headed over for some roullette and picked up a few quid.

Then the punto table beckoned, I employed a simple strategy, you either bet on the bank or punto, it's close to 50/50, I martingaled my bets, I bet 10 if I lost I bet 20, then forty etc. Pretty quickly i turned my 400 into close to 1k.

Then it happened, I lost my 10, then 20, then 40, then 80, then 160, I can't lost the next one I thought, and moved all in for my last 320. boom, busto.

I used my last bit of change to catch the bus home. This was in dec.

I then borrowed 500 to play on the internet, I started of at the lowest levels of .10/.20 before building up to a 6k bankroll within two months to play 1/2nl.

But since feb I've just been losing.

I busted my bankroll on one site doing flips, where everyone just sat at a table goinf all-in every hand regardless of cards, I built up a huge stack but lost it all. I got such a buzz out of the gambooling it didn't matter.

Below is a link to a graph of my winnings, excluded is 2k in tournament winnings, and another 2k in rakeback and bonus'.

http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c215/phantom_lord1983/boring2.jpg

this is a graph from last night

I also have a ticket for the irish open on friday, worth 3.5k, I don't know if I'm good enough to cash, it might just be a waste of money.

I'm beginning to doubt I can make money at poker, I'm also beginning to suspect the site I play on is rigged to induce more action and generate rake.
I sometimes wonder if I should just quit and get a job like "normal" people.

I'm well known among some of my friends for my hefty gambling habits, one of them handed me a pamphlet from gamblers anonymous, you know the one saying if you can tick 7 out of these 30 boxes you have a problem? I could tick nearly all the boxes. A blog containing the whole jouney is linked in my sig.

do I need help?


cliff notes: I've just turned 19 and I've won and lost vast quanties of cash. am i a sick degenerate?

phantom_lord wrote:

Well I have gotten back on top of college, top of the class in my last exam (ship it!)

I am a fairly burnt out and frustrated atm, hopefully I'll cash this weekend and I'll end up taking a decent break.