bored with life, love and eveything else

LegacyUser · 25-02-2007 01:13AM #1

hey all,

I'm not looking for sympathy, pity or any of that. Just want to see if anyone feels the same.

I graduated college last year with a good degree. Landed a great job, settled in, renting a house with two nice lads, I'm 24 yr old male, own car, keeps fit, outgoing. Everything seems hunky dory.

But it just doesn't feel right. I have no close friends, spend most of my weekends alone or meet up with my one only true friend, and that's a rarity coz he's busy with his woman. I split up with my gf a few weeks back coz I felt trapped. She just wasn't for me and her idea of "fun" was going out and getting wasted drunk every weekend. Sex life was hopeless as well.

Thing is I have no one to really talk to, my folks and bro live a fair bit away from me and I rarely see them. When I do talk with them there ain't much to say. I've pretty much disassociated myself from my whole family.

Aside from that I've come to realisation that I'm bored. Bored with work, bored with the one friend I have, bored with the friends I don't have, bored getting up, bored at the weekends, bored going out. I've got limited funds at the moment because of medical bills so travel is out of the question.

I don't want to sit at my desk any longer and do the same damn job all my life. Everyone's solution is travel. I am tempted but it's just hard to decide.

For a long time I wanted to join the army, had plans through school but put it aside to attend college. I know this post sounds if I'm going mad but hell, I probably am. Due to surgery I had I'm disqualified from the Irish army, this really bugged me. Now my other choice is the foreign legion.

I'm essentially sitting here thinking what to do. My contract at work is up this august so I intend to sell all my possessions within the next few months, bye bye car, computer, xbox, guitars, cds, dvds and whatever crap I accumulated over the years. Time to start afresh.

With whatever money I'll have left I might travel for awhile before going to the legion. Just give my life one more shot.

Do I sound mad? Has anyone felt this bored with life in a similar position as me? I know I have it better than alot of others in my position. Again I ain't looking for sympathy, I'm thankful for what I have, after all I did work for it.

Ruu_Old · 25-02-2007 03:53AM

It doesn't sound too mad to me. Sometimes a change of scenery with new people and different cultures can change your outlook on things totally.

admiralofthefleet · 25-02-2007 06:18AM

have a look at clubs/societies in your locality and join one that suits you, you could meet new friends there and your life could go in a whole new direction. why travel? the same life you talk about could be there when you get back.

nobodythere · 25-02-2007 07:26AM

Fitter, happier, more productive...

Congratulations, you can't come to terms with a sucky life. That won't last forever so do something about it now. I think you know what you have to do and you're procrastinating.

StormWarrior · 25-02-2007 08:25AM

Maybe you could think of a cause you care about, and take up voluntary work one day a week to support it? Might make you feel you are doing something worthwhile and making the world a better place.

summerwine · 25-02-2007 08:46AM

I highly recommend travelling!! I always say that when you are happy you make good decisions and sad, you make bad decisions.

Moral of the story, stay happy, go travelling and life will suddenly fall into place for you!!!

All the best

25-02-2007 08:54AM

Wasn't bored like you, but my situation was a mess more than a year back. Worked through an agent and landed something to do overseas. Got travel and work. It was a good move from Dub at the time and the money is good. I'm certainly not bored.

alias06 · 25-02-2007 11:42AM

The Foreign Legion! As long as you know what that is actually like. The training, both mentally and physically, would be unbelievably hard, possibly the toughest in the world.
You're probably best off talking to a counsellor before making any life changing decisions.

Saruman · 25-02-2007 12:01PM

Why Foreign Legion? as last person said thats jumping in at the deep end.. unless you are mistaking the Foreign Legion with any random military that goes overseas

You can join an Irish military but you might want to join a British one for a bit more fun etc.

The Sweeper · 25-02-2007 12:20PM

If you're joining the army for something to do with teamwork, a sense of belonging and a sense of achievement, you could look at other vocations - police work, fire brigade. They may also give you more of a feeling of helping your own community than the foreign legion.

Deacon Blues · 25-02-2007 01:07PM

I don't mean to be unkind, but I don't really think you have a clue what you're considering here.

You're disqualified from Irish military service on medical grounds, so you think the Foreign Legion will accept you ??? Think again. The REP has some of the most demanding physical requirements of any regiment in any army in the world. It is also an incredibly mentally challenging course, where many applicants are tested beyond their mental limits, and then rejected, broken. For the ones who survive, they're locked into a contract. The romantic idea of joining the REP, and spending a few years in the desert with good mates is just that ... a romantic idea. The reality is very different. The camaraderie and brotherhood is definitely there, serving with people of many nationalities ... the only French personnel are the officers ... but life is very tough. Don't mean to burst your bubble, but if you're serious about joining, check it out now and see if you're eligible. Don't wait to go off traveling with this in the back of your mind. I suspect that you won't be eligible (if you can't join the Irish Army, almost certainly not), so there's no point in having this as a backup plan. You'll be in for more disappointment later.

Regarding your current situation ... welcome to life. That's the reality for most people. A job which is comfortable and pays the bills, a few friends, only one or two of which we're really close to, and if we're really lucky, a partner we love and who loves us back, with the added bonus for some of a kid or two. The majority of people will fall into this category and will be happy with it. Some, like you, either don't want it, or aren't ready for it yet. That's fine. Travel is a good bridge for most, one or two years doing the grand tour of Asia and Oz will usually help immensely and grow your confidence, experience and maturity (I'm not suggesting that you're immature now), to a point where you are either ready to settle down with the majority, or have a firm and realistic idea of what you want from life.

You don't sound mad, just unfulfilled. Think for a while, don't do anything rash, like burning bridges with your boss, and see if you can figure out what's missing. A bit of travel may help this process, or someone else here may have the perfect solution.

Whatever happens, good luck and stay safe.

LegacyUser · 25-02-2007 01:35PM

why not try joining the f.c.a or navy reserve to see if military life is for you.

LegacyUser · 25-02-2007 02:54PM

cheers for all your replies.
The clubs/societies thing I have tried but kind of wandered away from it. There is not much to do where I am at the moment.

Travelling again pops up and the only thing that is setting me back is the thought of coming home again. I have researched in to jobs abroad, but the thing is do I really want to do the same job in another country? I have to think about this one.

Finally the army thing, yes I understand what it takes to be in the Legion, I have done a few months research in to training and what not. The legion will accept my medical condition (laser eye surgury) as it has posted on their site. This is not a spur of the moment idea, I've thought about military life for awhile, 5+ years or so. I know it ain't romantic, it's tough, but the challenges I'm facing now seem pale in comparison to I want to face. Sounds a bit masochistic but if something isn't pushing back and challenging me I feel uneasy.

Councelling is something I would not like to go to. I lived with a psychiatrist for a year who completely changed my opinion on them. Miserable snobby bastards.

A sense of belonging is something I guess, but isn't that what we're all looking for in the end? I guess some people just find it easier to belong, I always sit on the fringe.

Has anyone went travelling alone before? If so what was it like?

bronte · 26-02-2007 01:56AM

I don't know if this would suit your personality or not but have you ever joined a drama group?
It's challenging, will definitely give you a sense of belonging, and is so much fun too with a great social side to it.
Think about it.

bored with life, love and eveything else

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