How do you know she wants to come home with you?

In IRL · 05-02-2007 05:49PM #1

How does one know, as a guy, that a girl wants to come with you (verbally).

I would get it if she was being physical with me throughout the night but it wouldn't be as clear to me because girls have a round about way of saying things:o

I was out this weekend and this girl who I had been talking to in the club all night said

'So where are you going after this?'

I was a bit drunk but I can't believe that I didnt take up the chance! Thinking about it now makes it soo obvious:mad:

So that this doesn't happen next time round, ladies/guys

what does/did a woman tell you to suggest you take her home that night? (In your past experiences)

Faith · 05-02-2007 06:08PM

Generally, it's best to just try your luck and ask. However, don't do what a guy did to my friend a while back: Pick her up and carry her outside, while saying, "Let's fúck".

biko · 05-02-2007 07:07PM

I've been asked "So do you live close?"
"Yes, would you like to see my house?"

Fanny Cradock · 05-02-2007 07:11PM

Faith wrote:

Generally, it's best to just try your luck and ask. However, don't do what a guy did to my friend a while back: Pick her up and carry her outside, while saying, "Let's fúck".

Did it work?

randylonghorn · 05-02-2007 07:33PM

Faith wrote:

Generally, it's best to just try your luck and ask. However, don't do what a guy did to my friend a while back: Pick her up and carry her outside, while saying, "Let's fúck".

Don't mean to go off-topic, but ... holy three minute stand, Batman!

Surely he was taking the piss?

OT: I have a less than perfect history on this one myself, OP, and have often been bawled out by friends for missing the obvious. Through time, though, I have come to rely on the basic rule: "It's not what she says, it's the way that she says it".

Haven't ended up banging my head off the chipper wall quite as often recently!

Caliden · 05-02-2007 10:14PM

Chance your arm and ask if she wants to go back to yours for a 'coffee'

Kinetic^ · 05-02-2007 10:18PM

"So we've been wearing face for the whole night, what ya want for breakfast?" If she says sausage you're onto a winner.

But seriously, I'd be inclined to wait for her to say it. If she doesn't say anything like that then get her digits and arrange to meet up for another night.

Faith · 05-02-2007 11:02PM

Fanny Cradock wrote:

Did it work?

Not that time, but she gave him another chance the next time they met.

Another thing OP, just because a girl is friendly in a club or bar, it doesn't automatically mean she wants to go home with you that night. Many girls want to wait a while. So, if you do ask and she refuses, don't assume it's never going to happen. If you like her, your next step is to ask her out and hope she gives it up sooner rather than later.

In IRL · 06-02-2007 12:14PM

Faith wrote:

Not that time, but she gave him another chance the next time they met.

Another thing OP, just because a girl is friendly in a club or bar, it doesn't automatically mean she wants to go home with you that night. Many girls want to wait a while. So, if you do ask and she refuses, don't assume it's never going to happen. If you like her, your next step is to ask her out and hope she gives it up sooner rather than later.

so push it as far as you can the night as you meet her then if she's not into it hope for it another time?

very insightful, thanks faith.

but is it ok to assume she is into you sexuallly if she is friendly in a bar/club. because you don't really go to these places to make new friends right? - unless you are going with your friends to meet their friends.

In IRL · 06-02-2007 12:16PM

biko wrote:

I've been asked "So do you live close?"
"Yes, would you like to see my house?"

thanks for that biko i want real examples:rolleyes:

Heyes · 06-02-2007 12:27PM

In IRL wrote:

so push it as far as you can the night as you meet her then if she's not into it hope for it another time?

very insightful, thanks faith.

but is it ok to assume she is into you sexuallly if she is friendly in a bar/club. because you don't really go to these places to make new friends right? - unless you are going with your friends to meet their friends.

Go with everything faith is saying, she s hit the nail on the head and what that guy said to her friend is hillarious...

you can meet someone anywhere, so dont asume just cause its in a nightclub as you said above that something cant come out of it,just go for it.

Flat · 06-02-2007 12:31PM

tbh man, you need to get the courage up to snog them in the club, this way its more of an assumption they come home with you and makes it so much easier

if you dont get the chance or bottle it, you gotta pretty much ask them straight up. then you are into a total mindfield.

'no' could mean yes, but ask me again
'no' could actually mean no
no answer whatsoever (silence) is usually good (like she smiles or something)
some totally unrelated answer means yes OR how do I get rid of this wacko
'do you think I am a slapper' or something similar means they need some convincing

god this is the worst guide ever and frankly I have run out of energy, trial and error my friend.... goodluck!

Kell · 06-02-2007 02:42PM

In IRL wrote:

but is it ok to assume she is into you sexuallly if she is friendly in a bar/club.

Oh dear. Can someone pour this guy a large shot of reality check for a moment.

First- you assume that if someone is friendly in the pub they are into you sexually.

Second- you assume that if she asks where you are going afterward she wants to jump your bones and ride you till she screams with orgasms.

Oh dear. I doubt if you, the OP, is <Insert preferred James Bond actor> and has women literally orgasming on sight. Being friendly does not intimate sexual interest, it intimates "being friendly"*.

If you fancy yourself as much as you imply, why didnt you say "back to mine. Do you fancy it"?

K-

*Women take note. We are not** trying to get into get into your knickers if we talk to you in a pub/club

**not necessarily all the time though

Faith · 06-02-2007 03:33PM

In IRL wrote:

so push it as far as you can the night as you meet her then if she's not into it hope for it another time?

I mean ask her once* does she maybe fancy coming back to yours. If she says no, let it go for now. Don't keep pestering her to say yes. Once you've asked for the first time, she knows that's what you want, and if she changes her mind, she'll let you know.

(* visions of In IRL going "go on, go on, go on, go on...)

In IRL wrote:

but is it ok to assume she is into you sexuallly if she is friendly in a bar/club. because you don't really go to these places to make new friends right? - unless you are going with your friends to meet their friends.

If by friendly you mean dancing with you in a sexual manner and kissing you, then yes, it's safe enough to assume she either fancies you or is supremely drunk and probably easy. If by friendly you mean holding a conversation with you, or smiling a bit, I wouldn't automatically assume she's interested. She could just be a friendly person. I often chat to guys I'm not interested in in bars and clubs.

How do you know she wants to come home with you?

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