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I just don't know what to do with myself!!!

  • 27-05-2006 10:38pm
    #1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7


    Hey all,

    Sorry to bore ye with yet another long relationship thread, but I'm feeling really low about this and I need some advice from someone impartial!

    Myself and my bf broke up about 6 weeks ago. It was fairly mutual, things hadn't been great since Christmas when we had a massive bust-up. We were just short of 4 years together when we broke up. I'm 21 and in college, and he's 22 and working full-time. I was also living with him as where he's from is closer to my college.

    We hadn't seen each other since the break-up until today. We were both getting on with things, slowly but surely putting what had happened behind us and starting to feel more comfortable in our new lives apart.

    Until this week, contact had been kept to a minimum, the occasional random how are ya text or whatever, but no calls or any other contact. This week has been majorly stressful for me as I've had pretty major exams in college. I rang him on Tuesday night as I was in a bad way nerves-wise, I needed someone to talk to and he knows me better than anyone else. So what started off being a quick chat turned into an hour-long conversation. We decided to meet up as I was staying in the city for the weekend to study for my last few exams.

    We met up today, had a nice chat, went for a walk, sat in the park, went for dinner and then came back to my place for his keys n stuff. But one thing led to another when we got back... I know this sounds really stupid, but it just felt so right. I ended up telling him I still loved him n crying my eyes out when he left.

    I know breaking up was great for us, we were at each others throats constantly when we lived together. I didn't have a life as all I did was put all my energy into keeping us afloat. But I've really come into my own since Easter, I'm having a great time. I really want him back though, more than anything!!!

    But so many things are different now.. Am I just being a stupid sissy girl, or should I try n get us back together??? I need an outsiders view on this because my head's melted!! Danke schon!!!


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    i don't have a lot to say except that sounds a bit like me. i'm out of a three year relationship for the last 4 months. we split up for the same reasons - constantly at each others throats all the time. it had gotten to the stage that most of our encounters ended up with shouting or tears. Still though, I find myself getting sad about it and thinking I would do absolutely anything to have him back. It still gets to me quite a bit, but when you're in that mood it's easy to forget that you had a good reason for breaking up. Try to remember those reasons. Believe me, I know it's hard, and much easier said than done. But I'm going through it myself, and it just takes time. hope this helped.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    Do you know what he wants? Dont be disappointed if its one sided.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7 Dippy


    Thanks for the replies guys.

    He's told me he'd like for us to get back together, and that he loves me... I dunno!!!! Maybe after the summer we should try again if we both feel the same then? Maybe it's just false hope on my part.. It's a toughie!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 184 ✭✭DubNside


    I can only advise that you make a clean break, i.e no Contact.
    I know it seems hard now, but in the medium to long term it will be the best.

    You need to stand up for yourself, learn to be independant and build a life for yourself.

    And sure your v young and have the rest of your life to get on with!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 58 ✭✭Spliffany692000


    Why get back after the summer??
    If you two want to give it another go..well try it!! Would you like to live life wondering...and having those what ifs?? The summer would be great because ur both free and would it be possible to take a trip away...discover a new place together? If you do get back with him...dont move in with him take things slow and stuff!!

    Good luck x


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 468 ✭✭MrJones


    great song by Jack White. video is great as well with Kate Moss!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,524 ✭✭✭✭Gordon


    MrJones wrote:
    great song by Jack White. video is great as well with Kate Moss!!
    Do let us know when you actually have anything to contribute, we're waiting with baited breath.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 468 ✭✭MrJones


    ok ok,i want to contribute!!!!.
    i think dizzy..sorry im meant dippy you should split up and go single for a few years. youre only 21. enjoy single life and make some new connections..


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 418 ✭✭X-SL


    MrJones wrote:
    great song by Jack White. video is great as well with Kate Moss!!

    i started singing it to myself when i saw the title :D haha

    4 years is a long time. If you love him and think you want to grow old with him, get back together


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 14,055 ✭✭✭✭tk123


    If you both want to get back together why not give it a try? You say that you enjoyed your freedom after living together so why not take it slowly and see how it goes?


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