Check to see if your Cow is getting it on.

spongebob · 19-05-2004 12:02AM #1

Some of ye can never recognise when a Cow is up for it. I found a couple of top tips for you....starting with a warning to carry a notebook when around cows in heat.
Others among ye reckon that steam rising off a Cows back can mean imminent jiggy jiggy. It means no such thing . It probably rained recently so what you see is a normal evaporative processes as per d' oul laws of physics.

Here is what you need to look out for and do about it. If it doubt stay out of the way, especially if they are brand new wellies.

Breeding
Critical time. This needs lots of attention. Carry a note book when herding.

If you are AI'ing heat detection is key. Early in the morning and late in the evening are good times to find cows on heat. Get the cows up if they are resting. Some animals will show short heats. Cows/heifers doing the riding today are likely to be in standing heat within a couple of days. Tail painting helps show what went on when you weren't around.

Have you a couple lively steers, or better still a vasectomised bull with a chin ball harness? The vasectomy needs to be carried out two months ahead of the breeding season.

Is your bull fertile? Hothouse reared young bulls are notorious for temporary infertility. Use the note book for recording dates of animals on heat.

From the Farmers Journal this week, full articleHere

M

Rabies · 19-05-2004 12:08AM

Any particular reason how/why you came across that

Kobie · 19-05-2004 12:10AM

I generally find just asking her if she fancies a bit to be a fairly reliable method. Calling her a cow to her face will dampen her mood though.

alleepally · 19-05-2004 12:10AM

Should this not be in the Farming section ?

dahamsta · 19-05-2004 12:36AM

Originally posted by Rabies
Any particular reason how/why you came across that

That's disgusting!

Karoma · 19-05-2004 12:42AM

off hand (badumtish), what exactly is the whole 'tail painting' thing?

sceptre · 19-05-2004 01:05AM

Thanks Muck. I don't have a cow at present due to lack of space for a milking parlour in the middle room but when I get one and feed it on fresh strawberries and dandelions, I'll be sure to check back through my bookmarks.

Nice to see the Farmer's Journal hasn't gone down that annoying registration route.

spongebob · 19-05-2004 09:38AM

We must never forget that which stopped us all emigrating and turning the lights off .

Cows.

M

tman · 19-05-2004 09:42AM

Originally posted by Muck
Others among ye reckon that steam rising off a Cows back can mean imminent jiggy jiggy. It means no such thing . It probably rained recently so what you see is a normal evaporative processes as per d' oul laws of physics.

damn! i was full sure she was gagging for it...
good thing cows can't blab to the cops:)

eth0_ · 19-05-2004 09:44AM

I'd say Muck was half cut when he posted that hahaha

spongebob · 19-05-2004 10:15AM

Imagine a piercing forum mod who did not know all about

a vasectomised bull with a chin ball harness?

I am bringing one to the Boards Beer on Saturday. For insurance reasons I must leave the Bull in the truck outside but I'll bring in the "chin ball harness" so that you can stroke it

. I'll bring the piercing gear along too, its fairly industrial looking but remember that it will not be sterilised and that you are not insured so pleeeeease be careful with it , OK ? . We'll take it in rotas to feed the bull and if a clamper shows up we'll take him walkies on the Quay.

If any of your regulars want to know about "tail painting " I'll explain it during walkies. Is that fair or wha' ? Bring your own makeup , puhleease.

M

dahamsta · 19-05-2004 10:19AM

Originally posted by Muck
Imagine a piercing forum mod who did not know all about

ROFL

spongebob · 19-05-2004 11:02AM

Here is a Cow Test for y'all To Do (PDF) before the Beer Bash .

I refuse to discuss anything, even the bloody weather, with anyone who does not score at least 20 on the Cow Test.....OK

Do your own research on Question 7 , the one about the "Stripper Cows" . I could bring one along but I only have the one truck with no internal partitioning . Sorry.

M

mike65 · 19-05-2004 11:17AM

Say No to Cows!

The mess up the roads as they cross from field to yard and they're killing the planet!

Methane the second most important greenhouse gas is mostly produced by the digestive system of cows. The plants that cattle eat are digested by microrganisms.
During this process methane is produced. About twice every minute a cow belches or flatuates releasing methane. It is estimated by researchers that one cow can release a pound of methane each day. It is also estimated that the world is populated with 1.3 billion cows, which produces about 100 million tons of methane that goes into the atmosphere every year. Cows provide food, milk, and leather which are essentials to the world population. However the methane that cows produce is destroying the atmosphere which is causing the planet to heat up.

Mike.

CombatCow · 19-05-2004 04:15PM

CombatCow

pork99 · 19-05-2004 05:32PM

The only cows we're comfortable with in Dublin

http://www.cowparade.com/

http://ireland.cowparade.net/

btw Dublin is the only city in which the cows have vandalised, hooray for skangers! :rolleyes:

Karoma · 19-05-2004 05:37PM

Originally posted by pork99
btw Dublin is the only city in which the cows have vandalised, hooray for skangers! :rolleyes:

skanger moos?

Gordon · 19-05-2004 05:54PM

Muck, yer maaaad!

Check to see if your Cow is getting it on.

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