If RTÉ ran the Health Service instead of the HSE

Tubridy would run the Children's hospital and sing and throw toys at kids.

Marty Morreisery for care of the elderly.

Joe Duffy in the complaints department.

No TV Licence, no chemotherapy.

All out patient appointments cancelled during the Wotld Cup

Celebrity Heart Surgery.

Gall Stones, The Musical

I nominate you for the news

I’m getting mental images of Kathryn Thomas doing hospital rounds, rounding up potential patients for the next series of Operation Transformation.

Ambulances doing outside broadcasts, all services centralised in Donnybrook, Claire Byrne presenting her show from a GP waiting room.

Miriam presenting Prime Time from the maternity ward.

Sharon Ní Bheolain in charge of wardrobe, she’ll have everyone kitted out in those weird scrubs-looking outfits she wears.

Executives on ridiculous salaries and still with the lamh out for more, claiming they can’t cope with increasing costs without pay increases for themselves.

Wouldn’t be long before the health service would be back at square one, on life support, very much like is being done in RTE as it is!

Cancer diagnoses given to patients by the stars of RTE comedy.

Competition

Text Operation to 51707 followed by your Name to be boosted up the waiting list for an operation of your choice.

Who is Marty Morreisery ?

I meant this guy.

Nepotism would be even worse than it is already if RTE were in charge. All job vacancies would be reserved for the "well connected"

I could also imagine Blathnaid Ní Chofaigh as a tyrannical CNM, Ray D'arcy as a condescending admin middle manager and Brendan O'Connor as an incompetent Hospital CEO. Dermot Bannan would be an outside contractor who is awarded a big contract for renovating a new A&E department, mainly because he's best buddies with Brendan. The renovation project goes completely over budget of course.