Reasonable expenses in house share

Patsy167 · 26-03-2022 11:11am #1

A new housemate just sent us all a message on whatsappp looking to share expense on buying new pots, cushions, picture frames TV stands, and getting a cleaner in on a regular basis. Am I wrong in thinking its quite a selfish move? While the place is not in amazing condition, it is more than acceptable and we all clean up after ourselves and are respectful. It feels to me like they have different standards and expect the rest of us to crowd fund their wishes. I want the place to be enjoyable to live in for everyone but this feels over the top to me and while I have no interest in contributing to it, I don't want to upset the atmosphere either.

What are your thoughts or experiences with stuff like this?

alias no.9 · 26-03-2022 11:18am

This kind of thing should be done by agreement / consensus rather than diktat. At the very least, the person proposing this should be able to explain what happens to this stuff should a housemate move out.

gmisk · 26-03-2022 11:22am

Bit of a red flag with a new housemate...

Things that should be a house decision not one person deciding, if they want to buy it themselves work away...

Ciara26 · 26-03-2022 11:54am

That happened me, the argument was this house isn’t a home so we sud all pay to buy nicer things in the house. I just said no, I’m renting to so I can buy a home. They understood and they bought the items themselves. I wudnt be paying money like that in a rented place, plus what happens if ppl leave.

Caranica · 26-03-2022 11:56am

None of those things are essential, they're cosmetic. If they want them they can get them but there's no way I'd be paying for picture frames or cushions for a shared house.

Agree it's a red flag, give this person an inch and you'll be setting yourselves up for a lot of pain

Akrasia · 26-03-2022 11:57am

Let them buy their fancy things and take them with them when they move out. Do you have storage for the old TV stand etc, maybe the LL can hold on to them for you

covidcustomer · 26-03-2022 12:41pm

I agree with you and think that you're quite entitled to say that you're happy with the house. it suits your needs, thanks but no thanks.

Claw Hammer · 26-03-2022 1:29pm

Tell them to GTFO. They saw what they were getting when they moved in and if they don't like it now, tough.

HazeDoll · 26-03-2022 1:40pm

Is the new housemate from Ireland? Very broadly speaking, Irish people tend to see renting, particularly housesharing, as a phase to be endured until you get your own place. In lots of other countries it's a much more permanent state, so it make sense to get really comfortable.

26-03-2022 1:57pm

Not just selfish, but also out-of-touch. It should be each to their own. If they want to buy stuff for the house, they should be asking permission ("do you mind if I put some pictures up?"), not asking you for money. Not to mention what they plan to do with the old stuff, surely some of those things (e.g. cushions) are the landlord's property?

With the cleaner, if they wanted to get a cleaner I can imagine it makes sense to ask if the other housemates want to go in on it, since there will be communal areas involved. But that should be a conversation with everyone, not just an "I'm doing it, let's all pay". I had this happen in a previous house share and it turned out it suited all of us to pay towards the communal areas, but we kept our bedrooms clean ourselves. The person who had suggested it then paid more than us because she was also getting her room and ensuite cleaned, and she did all the organising.

Mrs OBumble · 26-03-2022 3:19pm

Agree with the above. Anything that a person can take with them when they leave should be purchased by one person, so that the owership is very clear. Anything that is fixed and cannot be taken, the landlord should be paying for.

Re the cleaner: those who feel the need for a cleaner can contribute.

kirving · 26-03-2022 3:33pm

As per the OP housemate is "looking to share expenses" - this doesn't sound like a demand at all.

If you've all just signed a lease for a year, I see absolutely nothing wrong with the suggestion that everyone contribute say €100-200 on a one off basis to improve everyone's living standards.

As a for a red flag? No way. I see it as a great sign that they're going out of their way to try and improve the place for everyone.

26-03-2022 4:50pm

What happens if your tastes in decor clash? Who decides on the cushions then? 😏

If you don't want to contribute, just politely say no. You're not obliged to contribute to soft furnishings, new furniture or decor items.

A regular cleaner (bi-weekly, monthly?) might not be a bad idea - I'd be open to a discussion on that.

meijin · 27-03-2022 10:32pm

shared cleaning never works... unless you like to live in dirt

getting a cleaner for a shared place is absolutely essential

MacDanger · 28-03-2022 9:58am

Yeah, paying for a cleaner for a shared house is a great idea IMO, avoids loads of hassle

witchgirl26 · 28-03-2022 10:04am

I could understand the cleaner and maybe the pots (depending on the state of the ones provided) being a shared expense but everything else should just be on a housemate by housemate basis. Otherwise it gets messy when one leaves & wants to bring something that they really like.

Reasonable expenses in house share

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