Being left out of birthday parties

absolutely- seen these cows of mothers several times. The only solution is ignoring them and getting in with your life. And stick their painful parties where the sun don’t shine

My advice would be to move on from it. It is hurtful and bullying but why waste time and emotional head space on people not worth the bother. It is very hard on young kids but my suggestion would be to try make other avenues for friends for her girl rather than wasting time and effort on those too far up their own arses. It’s a bit like dating- “plenty more fish in the sea”

You sound really patronising and dismissive.

Ah here

Bully parents raise bully kids

OP, I think the crux here is if your girl was the only girl excluded from the party.

You'll hear over time.

But I still stand over my earlier reaction that to exclude just one girl from the class is really mean.

If there was an issue between your daughter and the birthday child (which happens all the time), you'd hope that mother would approach your wife or the school to try and resolve it.

You are bang on with this comment. I couldnt agree more - bullies dont lick it off the ground. It is learned behaviour from home.

Any parent who leaves a child out at that age is giving the message to their child that it is ok not to include everyone - a very poor message to be giving a child for their future life.

Look, I will be honest. I was left out as a kid on one particular occasion. I was the only one also. It was extremely hurtful. It leads to a lot of wondering why I wasn’t good enough. I blamed myself. I mean who would want a nerdy loser at their party. My mother (this is late 90s) went to the mother of one of the children. She was very upset. We used to do car-pooling. She was dismissive and heartless, in a manner that reminds me of your own. This callous lady’s daughter has by all accounts grown into a very cruel person, devoid of any empathy towards those close to her. Me, it hurt. I had to work on my self-esteem. But in the long run, it is better to be the uncool kid than the cruel kid. People accepted me when I went into secondary school. I have my group of friends now. And most importantly, I have empathy. I wouldn’t trade all my difficult experiences for my empathy

I remember a fair bit of this type stuff going on in school (20-30 years ago now!), happening to me on occasion and also others in the class.

One incident stands out where one “friend” was supposed to come around to my house one Saturday. Come Saturday morning, no sign. Rang his house to check where he was- can distinctly remember the mother saying in rushed lying times “oh, he’s give to his cousins house”! Low and behold I see him being dropped off down the road to anothers house in his dads van. If he didn’t want to call around that was fine but it’s obvious some parents do indeed facilitate this kind of behaviour from personal experience.