Weekly Walrus

I wouldn't say that most songs are ballads. To me a ballad is a slower or softer song. For example, Love Bites by Def Leppard is posted above. That's definitely a ballad as it's a slow tempo song, whereas Pour Some Sugar on Me or Animal are out and out rock songs.

For LeVar – Power Ballad Primer

A power ballad is generally a slower tempo, often romantic song with a heavier musical backing than a traditional ballad. In addition it will feature some or all of the following:

- Gentle, often acoustic start followed by a key change and a drum intro as song builds to a crescendo. Guitars may be substituted for drums.

- Guitar solo. Non-negotiable, there must be a guitar solo.

- Big hair. Hairspray budget should be equivalent to the entire military budget of a small country.

- Jim Steinman. He’ll be in there somewhere, you probably just don’t realise it.

- Soft-focus video featuring a very attractive young lady. May or may not be in various stages of undress. If featured in a storyline with the lead singer, she will clearly be well out of his league.

- Rain. Quite often falling on the aforementioned attractive young lady.

- Completely overblown musical production. There wasn’t a knob left unturned or a slider left unslid in the studio when it was being recorded.

- When performed live, the song must be epic enough to make the entire crowd whip out their lighters immediately.

- Cheese. Lots and lots of it. So much cheese that it'll induce weird dreams for several nights, not just one.

Queen & David Bowie - Under Pressure