So are you single? Argos style....

Tell me how · 14-08-2020 09:37PM

Gretas Gonna Get Ya! wrote: »

Possibly... but then the Hugh Jackman types don't wait until they drive away and then text you with a number you didn't give them!

They have the confidence to say what want to say in person!

If the driver had done this, I wouldn't be surprised if it had ended up going the same way with anger being aimed at them for turning a professional interaction in to a personal one. It could be argued that they then felt immediately pressured to respond in a way that wouldn't offend and they are not uncomfortable standing in their own hallway because it reminds them of the experience.

Tell me how · 14-08-2020 09:37PM

I read the first number of posts on this before reading the article and expected his behaviour to have been much more suspect. I wonder if he had replaced his '?' text a few hours later, with a 'I take it you are not interested. Hope I didn't offend. Take Care'. Or if he had started with 'Hi this is X from Amazon, I dropped off your package around 12:15.....' would it have been treated differently.

The pendulum has swung from where it was pretty much acceptable for a man to say anything in the spirit of 'I'm joking' or 'I was just asking' to now it is unacceptable to say anything unless it is in an environment where it is obvious that both people there are looking to meet someone 'dating app', 'speed dating event' etc.

Maybe it will swing back a bit again to where the question can be asked and answered with both sides not being offended, whatever the outcome but I do understand that in some professional environments, it might always make some one uneasy if the person they are engaging with has admitted to being attracted to them.

Or, maybe AI will move to a point where matches are made with a v high degree of success and real world interactions or explorations no longer are required. Who knows.

Temptamperu · 14-08-2020 09:40PM

Its literally rape if the guy is ugly.

B.A._Baracus · 14-08-2020 09:40PM

hynesie08 wrote: »

I was expecting a few people to maybe call it sweet or a misunderstanding (a few did) but the level of vitriol against the girl is insane.

It'd be like you saying you like vanilla ice cream and me calling you a paedophile baby killing protestant......... You're probably not protestant...

... but I am a pedo baby killer. Lol. Nicely played :pac:

kenmm · 14-08-2020 09:57PM

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Well no Ken, it's you that has spun this out by, at the very least, insinuating this incident is comparable to sexual harassment. It is not.

It's not really an oversimplification though. If this lad was objectively good looking, she'd be delighted. Which is fair enough. I don't know what age she is but she kinda needs to grow up a bit. Women in general will be approached by men who they deem are not good looking alot and won't be interested in which is fair enough and also natural enough.

So then, she should actually be a big girl, not let the side down, block this lads number, report him if she feels so aggrieved (which obvs she has already done) and leave it at that. But no, shes looking for a pay out which she may get and a sympathy vote and FB likes.

Question for you, do you think this fella should lose his job over this? Because realistically speaking that is what is going to happen here.

Well church on Tuesday.. all I can say is Jesus Christ that's some mad world you live in. Read all my posts, I never said there was harassment.

It's been fun folks, another boards.ie random ****show of a thread!

hynesie08 · 14-08-2020 10:03PM

kenmm wrote: »

Well church on Tuesday.. all I can say is Jesus Christ that's some mad world you live in. Read all my posts, I never said there was harassment.

It's been fun folks, another boards.ie random ****show of a thread!

I knew where you were coming from, but I do not have the energy or desire to get into a discussion about the build up of sexual micro aggression women experience......
I agree with you though.

noodler · 14-08-2020 10:04PM

hynesie08 wrote: »

I just saw the girls post on the argos page, she used Facebook because she didn't want to give her phone number which is perfectly reasonable since they'd already crossed that line.....

She went through FB and gave her identity away to the world to avoid giving her phone number?

Would a call or email not have fulfilled the same purpose privately?

Rikand · 14-08-2020 10:07PM

noodler wrote: »

She went through FB and have her identity away to the world to avoid giving her phone number?

Would a call or email not have fulfilled the same purpose privately?

She clearly didnt think it through. The media saw the post and ran with it and a few days later, the finer side of social media has made her life, and probably the guys life, hell

hynesie08 · 14-08-2020 10:09PM

noodler wrote: »

She went through FB and have her identity away to the world to avoid giving her phone number?

Would a call or email not have fulfilled the same purpose privately?

Maybe I'm older but I don't have anything on social media that I don't want people to see. My phone number though, that's a different scenario altogether......

Church on Tuesday · 14-08-2020 10:18PM

kenmm wrote: »

Well church on Tuesday.. all I can say is Jesus Christ that's some mad world you live in. Read all my posts, I never said there was harassment.

It's been fun folks, another boards.ie random ****show of a thread!

You didn't answer my question and I'm not surprised.

Church on Tuesday · 14-08-2020 10:19PM

hynesie08 wrote: »

I knew where you were coming from, but I do not have the energy or desire to get into a discussion about the build up of sexual micro aggression women experience......
I agree with you though.

Happens against men too.

Neither is good obviously.

14-08-2020 10:36PM

Inappropriate yes. Creepy yes. Harmless, definitely.

But the response to his behavior has been blown out of proportion. He should be penalised/punished in work for breaking the rules, but nothing beyond that.

The idea that he should be fired or sued for causing some kind of emotional trauma is ridiculous.

MsStote · 14-08-2020 10:41PM

To be fair I have had this, the guy was a big guy and worked for tesco. I mean he comes into my home and I was afraid of him after he texted me. I did not give him my number and I had to call his work. However he knows where I live, I feared retribution for it. Hell I have cameras up in part due to this. I didn't want money, I just didn't want that happening again.

Like I have the numbers of some of the drivers, few of them on my facebook as we get on. He just went too far.

MsStote · 14-08-2020 10:43PM

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Happens against men too.

Neither is good obviously.

Too true and I find other women tend to feel that a guy shouldn't say he is uncomfortable or they respond "What are you gay?". It's a horrid situation.

kenmm · 14-08-2020 10:43PM

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

You didn't answer my question and I'm not surprised.

Sigh. Ok.

Yes he will loose his job. Not because of this so called 'sexual harassment' case that you invented but simply because he broke the trust if his employer by taking a customers data (and never mind that he caused public bad press etc)

Do I think he deserves to be fired on the very few facts I'm aware of? Probably not, if I were in charge I'd be looking to deal with this through disciplinary action and training.

But remind me, what's your point?

Church on Tuesday · 14-08-2020 10:58PM

kenmm wrote: »

Sigh. Ok.

Yes he will loose his job. Not because of this so called 'sexual harassment' case that you invented but simply because he broke the trust if his employer by taking a customers data (and never mind that he caused public bad press etc)

Do I think he deserves to be fired on the very few facts I'm aware of? Probably not, if I were in charge I'd be looking to deal with this through disciplinary action and training.

But remind me, what's your point?

And I wholeheartedly agree with you. He will certainly lose his job though over a dumb incident (not sexual harassment, he did nothing to her and I'm not the one who did imply that) which is a shame.

That's my point. Storm meet teacup. Just two kids as dumb as each other.

kenmm · 14-08-2020 11:03PM

He came across as a creep. That's all I ever said in relation to the girl.

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

I'm not the one who did imply that)

Cool. That makes two of us then.

Esse85 · 14-08-2020 11:08PM

What ages are those involved?
Sounds like a silly thing to do from the guy. Clearly he has no cop on.
I don't think there was intended malice there.
Probably bored and trying to create excitement for himself, but definitely can't be carrying on like that.

The girls reaction was over the top, we all know the explosion that happens when something is made public on social media. It's bringing attention on yourself.

The right course of action would of been to contact Argos directly in private and express her concerns.

Sam Quentin · 14-08-2020 11:11PM

hynesie08 wrote: »

I didn't say everyone, I said anyone, at least one person has said she was rude for not texting him back.....

Again, she has been called everything from ugly to a bitch, that is not a normal response......

I'd rather be called ugly and a bollóx than weird and creepy,. for texting a feckin girl...
Girls are so silly ðŸ˜‚

Church on Tuesday · 14-08-2020 11:13PM

kenmm wrote: »

He came across as a creep. That's all I ever said in relation to the girl.

Cool. That makes two of us then.

Not going in roundabouts over this I've said my piece.

I would ask that people use some common sense and leave agendas to one side; both genders have done ****ty things to each other for centuries and people's personal experience with either gender should not color people's perspective over a fairly, in the grand scale of things, dumb innocuous incident like this blown completely out of proportion, yet when these kinds of threads come up, it always does.

eviltwin · 14-08-2020 11:13PM

I’d imagine the contract he signed would have a section on customer data and it’s improper use. I know mine does. Stupid thing to do but if you play silly games expect a p45. Hopefully he will be a bit more professional in his next job.

Tell me how · 14-08-2020 11:15PM

Does this mean that if you meet someone through your professional work, you can never explore a relationship with them?

But, how are you to know? His text wasn't derogatory or gratuitous and it seems he didn't respond with any insulting comments at any point.

Say this guy was smitten, love at first sight, butterflies in stomach and all that. If she had felt the same way, this could be a feel good story. (I do realise that is an 'If' there, and who knows how big that is in any given situation)

Sam Quentin · 14-08-2020 11:17PM

Esse85 wrote: »

What ages are those involved?
Sounds like a silly thing to do from the guy. Clearly he has no cop on.
I don't think there was intended malice there.
Probably bored and trying to create excitement for himself, but definitely can't be carrying on like that.

The girls reaction was over the top, we all know the explosion that happens when something is made public on social media. It's bringing attention on yourself.

The right course of action would of been to contact Argos directly in private and express her concerns.

Maybe he's older than we think or they both are...and maybe he didn't think she'd act like a complete silly girl by telling everyone on fb!? Would have been such a nice Rom-Com if only she just didn't go all psycho....poor guy. Anyway I still don't understand how she heard the doorbell when she was washing the dishes and why didn't she have a meal ready for him when he called!? Some women just don't know their place these days.. lol

Henry Ford III · 14-08-2020 11:20PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

using somebody's contact details you got from working with their info to ask them out after meeting them once is insane behaviour.

insane.

trying to handwave that away as if its normal is ridiculous

What if he'd asked her out in person when he met her? Is that against GDPR or similar?

Sardonicat · 14-08-2020 11:25PM

Henry Ford III wrote: »

What if he'd asked her out in person when he met her? Is that against GDPR or similar?

No. It's not very professional though. But if they'd been interacting and a bit of rapport built up and he could read social cues then fair enough. But what he did was way off. Either totally socially inept, which is not her job to ameliorate, or a complete and utter creep.

o1s1n · 14-08-2020 11:26PM

Jaysus, hard to believe anyone wouldn't find this weird and creepy. I've read about takeaway delivery drivers doing it too. Completely unacceptable.

Years ago, a girl I used to live with had a door to door sales man knock. He was pretty pushy and managed to get into the house to check the electric meter.

Started getting very friendly with compliments calling her a 'beautiful girl' and asking for her number/was she single when he was in the bloody house! She was beyond freaked out as you can imagine.

We rang up to complain and insisted he was fired. Apparently that's what happened.

It's a bit freaky having someone fired who then knows where you live..!

noodler · 14-08-2020 11:27PM

hynesie08 wrote: »

Maybe I'm older but I don't have anything on social media that I don't want people to see. My phone number though, that's a different scenario altogether......

I think you've missed the point here.

Not only could she have phoned or emailed her complaint, and still kept her number private, but she could have avoided the whole world being able to see her complaint.

Tell me how · 14-08-2020 11:29PM

o1s1n wrote: »

Jaysus, hard to believe anyone wouldn't find this weird and creepy.

Given your post, can you comment on the below. I am genuinely curious.

Tell me how wrote: »

Does this mean that if you meet someone through your professional work, you can never explore a relationship with them?

But, how are you to know? His text wasn't derogatory or gratuitous and it seems he didn't respond with any insulting comments at any point.

Say this guy was smitten, love at first sight, butterflies in stomach and all that. If she had felt the same way, this could be a feel good story. (I do realise that is an 'If' there, and who knows how big that is in any given situation)

kenmm · 14-08-2020 11:31PM

Church on Tuesday wrote: »

Not going in roundabouts over this I've said my piece.

I would ask that people use some common sense and leave agendas to one side; both genders have done ****ty things to each other for centuries and people's personal experience with either gender should not color people's perspective over a fairly, in the grand scale of things, dumb innocuous incident like this blown completely out of proportion, yet when these kinds of threads come up, it always does.

Agendas? Like what? You've said your piece, but it's mostly made up (in relation to what you think I said or implied or what agenda I'm pushing).

I only ever said that the guy done a silly thing, probably good intentions but he crossed a line of creepiness. Not wanting him fired, locked up, balls cut off or anything.

I did use a history of harassment* to point out why you cannot oversimplify the argument around 'ah sure imagine it was a guy on the receiving end'. But tbh, that whole proposition is flawed as it's got SFA to do with this specific case.

No agenda, no building this one incident up.

*I also generalised, both sexes have done wrong in the past, irrelevant but true, terms and conditions apply etc etc

hynesie08 · 14-08-2020 11:32PM

Henry Ford III wrote: »

What if he'd asked her out in person when he met her? Is that against GDPR or similar?

No and if he'd have asked for her number and she said yes, that'd be fine......

So are you single? Argos style....

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