Some lads and obsession with sex

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:12PM #1

What’s the story here? Talking to a mate of mine last night and he and his girlfriend had to break up a few months back. Since then he said the only thing keeping him sane is porn. Is this actually a thing? Is sex really that fundamental for some people. I feel we are thought to see sex as this amazingly epic thing and I just don’t get it, this lad gets with all sorts just to have sex. I don’t know how he does it. Some lads are more randy than others. Makes me feel weird sometimes that I don’t have the same sort of need to have sex. Would kinda like to have it because would act as a more of a driving force I’d imagine.

01-01-2020 07:14PM

Sex is amazingly epic.

Guy:Incognito · 01-01-2020 07:16PM

Sex is pretty good to be fair.

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:18PM

Guy:Incognito wrote: »

Sex is pretty good to be fair.

Yeah but how good, like a rollercoaster good, a good cup of coffee?

I get that it’s good but in isolation, I’d never think I’d love to be having sex now. It’s not at the forefront of my thoughts or something I’m always honking about.

Signore Fancy Pants · 01-01-2020 07:20PM

I had sex once, it was awful.

Westernyelp · 01-01-2020 07:28PM

People have different Libidos. I wouldn't worry about it. Sex is great fun all the same

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:35PM

I generally think that the lads who are more desperate for sex, are the ones with the lower self esteems.

They are deeply unhappy by themselves, so they can only feel happy when they're in another person.

One lad talked to me about it - he said hat he felt so bad about himself , that he only felt good if he was having sex or drugs.

It is all about an attitude to sex. Many people who have fulfilling lives, are not desperate for sex. They enjoy it when they have it, but they are not desperately unhappy without it.

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:37PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Sex is amazingly epic.

For who? I know alot of women who have terrible sex stories:

Men pushing them into doing things they didnt want to do
Men being selfish
Men hitting them during sex.

I have heard women say that they have had really awful, scary sex.

Telly · 01-01-2020 07:40PM

Sarahdunners wrote: »

For who? I know alot of women who have terrible sex stories:

Men pushing them into doing things they didnt want to do
Men being selfish
Men hitting them during sex.

I have heard women say that they have had really awful, scary sex.

I’m a woman and I have amazing sex.

decky1 · 01-01-2020 07:41PM

told my young nephew if he did'nt stop touching himself he'd go blind, I'm over here by the window he said.

Jym Smith · 01-01-2020 07:42PM

Sarahdunners wrote: »

For who? I know alot of women who have terrible sex stories:

Men pushing them into doing things they didnt want to do
Men being selfish
Men hitting them during sex.

I have heard women say that they have had really awful, scary sex.

You're probably the most transparent WUM on this site, give a break would you and spend your time doing something worthwhile.

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:42PM

Sarahdunners wrote: »

I generally think that the lads who are more desperate for sex, are the ones with the lower self esteems.

They are deeply unhappy by themselves, so they can only feel happy when they're in another person.

One lad talked to me about it - he said hat he felt so bad about himself , that he only felt good if he was having sex or drugs.

It is all about an attitude to sex. Many people who have fulfilling lives, are not desperate for sex. They enjoy it when they have it, but they are not desperately unhappy without it.

It’s sad tbh. I don’t know if it’s a self-esteem thing. I’ve a friend and his whole life just revolves around endless Tinder dates and talking about girls and getting with girls and just I don’t get it. He’s a smart guy, handsome, he’s an extrovert though and think he just genuinely enjoys the buzz of getting to know people and dating and sex is how he gets to know random birds.

izzyflusky · 01-01-2020 07:43PM

Sarahdunners wrote: »

I generally think that the lads who are more desperate for sex, are the ones with the lower self esteems.

They are deeply unhappy by themselves, so they can only feel happy when they're in another person.

One lad talked to me about it - he said hat he felt so bad about himself , that he only felt good if he was having sex or drugs.

It is all about an attitude to sex. Many people who have fulfilling lives, are not desperate for sex. They enjoy it when they have it, but they are not desperately unhappy without it.

Obviously not what OP is referring to when mentioning his friend but I would say sex is a very important life of men and women equally. The difference might be on the sex drives of each individual rather than their gender.

I'd be quite unhappy if I didn't have it and I'm sure there are plenty of women who would feel the same. Doesn't make you desperate though.

And in terms of good Vs bad sex, you could have the same experience with anything in life but it doesn't make the subject bad per se. I love chocolate and I've tried great tasty ones and disgusting ones...but ultimately I still love it.

Das Reich · 01-01-2020 07:44PM

Eastern and northern (everything north of France) europeans hate sex. They should live in some mediterranean or latin american country for a while if they think people here have obsession with sex.

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:44PM

decky1 wrote: »

told my young nephew if he did'nt stop touching himself he'd go blind, I'm over here by the window he said.

That’s another thing, can easily go 2 months without fapping and other times could do it all day, but the urge isn’t down to blue balls or something which I’m convinced is a myth

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:45PM

izzyflusky wrote: »

Obviously not what OP is referring to when mentioning his friend but I would say sex is a very important life of men and women equally. The difference might be on the sex drives of each individual rather than their gender.

I'd be quite unhappy if I didn't have it and I'm sure there are plenty of women who would feel the same. Doesn't make you desperate though.

And in terms of good Vs bad sex, you could have the same experience with anything in life but it doesn't make the subject bad per se. I love chocolate and I've tried great tasty ones and disgusting ones...but ultimately I still love it.

Yeah but is the itnamacy, the bond, the feeling someone knows you’re attractive or the act itself?

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:45PM

Telly wrote: »

I’m a woman and I have amazing sex.

So what! That is your story.

Does that discount the stories of the other women that I was talking about? No it doesn't.

You have amazing sex.
Many women I have talked to have experienced sexual violence.

They can both exist

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:46PM

Jym Smith wrote: »

You're probably the most transparent WUM on this site, give a break would you and spend your time doing something worthwhile.

Emmm, aren't you doing the exact same thing as me? Lol. So you are insulting yourself.

izzyflusky · 01-01-2020 07:48PM

completedit wrote: »

Yeah but is the itnamacy, the bond, the feeling someone knows you’re attractive or the act itself?

Probably a mix of everything mentioned and at different levels depending on the situation or mood. Sometimes the intimacy/bond is a huge part, while others it's the animal urge... I don't see it as something static or black and white but definitely a very important part of my life at least.

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:48PM

completedit wrote: »

That’s another thing, can easily go 2 months without fapping and other times could do it all day, but the urge isn’t down to blue balls or something which I’m convinced is a myth

I'd be the same - I could go without it for ages.

Then - if I meet some one that I really like - I want it alot with them.

So it is more about the person for me.

decky1 · 01-01-2020 07:53PM

completedit wrote: »

That’s another thing, can easily go 2 months without fapping and other times could do it all day, but the urge isn’t down to blue balls or something which I’m convinced is a myth

think 'Blue Balls happens when ----let's say you don't finish the game.:rolleyes::eek:

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:53PM

decky1 wrote: »

think 'Blue Balls happens when ----let's say you don't finish the game.:rolleyes::eek:

That is a myth

Ubbquittious · 01-01-2020 07:54PM

Sure everyone likes an auld siagín

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:55PM

Jym Smith wrote: »

You're probably the most transparent WUM on this site, give a break would you and spend your time doing something worthwhile.

I'm flattered that you remember me. I don't remember you at all. Are you following me on different threads?

You have a little too much time on your hands

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:55PM

izzyflusky wrote: »

Probably a mix of everything mentioned and at different levels depending on the situation or mood. Sometimes the intimacy/bond is a huge part, while others it's the animal urge... I don't see it as something static or black and white but definitely a very important part of my life at least.

The act for you is probably so intertwined with the former it’s hard to separate them, for me though, sex for most of my life was just an idea, I think my mind got used to the idea that sex was something other people did, not me. Things changed, actually enjoy it when I’m turned on but even though my girlfriend is super attractive, I’m not always the one that wants to go

completedit · 01-01-2020 07:55PM

decky1 wrote: »

think 'Blue Balls happens when ----let's say you don't finish the game.:rolleyes::eek:

Not me anyway. I’ve got hard not finished and been grand afterwards.

_Kaiser_ · 01-01-2020 07:55PM

Sarahdunners wrote: »

So what! That is your story.

Does that discount the stories of the other women that I was talking about? No it doesn't.

You have amazing sex.
Many women I have talked to have experienced sexual violence.

They can both exist

Haven't we had this thread already? All these anecdotes of others?

Good sex with the right person is amazing.

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:56PM

I love amazing sex, like everyone else.

I hate sex where I am pushed into doing things that I don't want to do.

There are many different layers of sex.

There is respectful sex.

There is abusive sex.

Ubbquittious · 01-01-2020 07:56PM

Sarahdunners wrote: »

I'm flattered that you remember me. I don't remember you at all. Are you following me on different threads?

You have a little too much time on your hands

Maybe ye should meet up for an auld cupan

Sarahdunners · 01-01-2020 07:57PM

_Kaiser_ wrote: »

Haven't we had this thread already? All these anecdotes of others?

Good sex with the right person is amazing.

No Kaiser, it is a different thread. There is usually a thread about sex on here every week.

Telly · 01-01-2020 07:58PM

You seem to be very wound up, Sarah.

Some lads and obsession with sex

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