De Ploughing

EmmetSpiceland · 17-09-2019 01:03PM #1

How on earth is this a major “event”, drawing such big numbers? It sounds like a truly awful way to spend your day.

Tractors ploughing fields and stomping around various farming supply tents listening to yahoos shouting “hup” and “hon the banner!” or whatever parochial nickname their town/county has.

Probably has “Wagon Wheel” constantly blaring over speakers that double as bunting poles too

A few of the girls from here have been talking about it nonstop for the last month. Talking about, no word of lie, which wellies were “best” to go with their outfits. They share lots of jokes about “finding a man” and, obviously, “road frontage” and this brings them on to talk of the “Aisling” book and how they’re all so like her. All of them.

I can think of few things worse than standing around in a field with lots of old men with rope belts keeping their “trousers” up and both hands, firmly, in their pockets. Always wearing those thick suits, probably older than they are, whether it’s cold and rainy or blistering sunshine. Then having some freckled young lads in navy gilets running around bumping into you roaring “hit the diff!” and shítting themselves laughing.

I’ve had to endure spending time with my partner’s “people” out west on a few occasions and it’s always the same. Incessant weather chat, pointing out the long, or short, evenings and “‘tis an Indian summer we’re having” type pronouncements.

Then, down the pub, having to endure some of the locals from further afield. Poking fun at my accent or asking my partner if “so and so” is her uncle and on her answer in the affirmative falling around laughing telling her “Softy, we used to call him!”. Base humour.

The coverage the Ploughing is getting is beyond me. Pat Kenny was broadcasting from there today. The Dubs win “five in a row”, a feat never achieved by any other side, in either code, and one that I, personally, don’t believe will be done again, and there’s no mention of it. Instead it’s this country “festival” that’s getting all the coverage, that and the country “beef” drama.

Can’t just let us have our “moment”. Up the Dubs!!

Boom_Bap · 17-09-2019 01:05PM

Ye do know that it's a drunken rampant f*ck fest?

blinding · 17-09-2019 01:05PM

De Dubs will never win De Ploughing .

Woke Hogan · 17-09-2019 01:05PM

My daughter brought that Aisling book home one day. I leafed through it and virtually gagged. You can tell whoever wrote that's never read anything more challenging than the Harry Potter books, or The Beano.

Dublin Spur · 17-09-2019 01:12PM

not everyone's the same
live and let live

JohnnyFlash · 17-09-2019 01:15PM

Extremely incoherent and rambling OP, Emmet. Are you on the sherry already?

We’ve a stand down here this year. It’s great for business, and we get the majority of our sales for the year from the 3 days. Plenty of top looking women walking around as well, and the good weather has everyone in great mood. The food village is worth the price of entry alone.

sbsquarepants · 17-09-2019 01:18PM

A heap of the wolly backs in work go missing for the few days every year. The ploughing is basically the haj for culchies - they have to make the pilgrimage or they don't get to finally ride some dirty aul one in culchie heaven i believe.

There's no fúcking civilisation in them!:mad:

Lady Haywire · 17-09-2019 01:18PM

Aongus Von Bismarck has a challenger!

WB Yokes · 17-09-2019 01:19PM

Culchies are a strange species.

Trigger Happy · 17-09-2019 01:21PM

I have just turned up in Tullamore. No ploughing. They moved the damned thing.

Capra · 17-09-2019 01:23PM

Aw... Did someone dig up the onions you planted in your allotment? Maybe somebody infringed on your 20 square foot garden? Or maybe someone had the nerve to drive a tractor in front of you when you went down the country (Wicklow) for a weekend getaway. Although you probably don't have a car...

I'm confused as to where the anger stems from.

blinding · 17-09-2019 01:24PM

Trigger Happy wrote: »

I have just turned up in Tullamore. No ploughing. They moved the damned thing.

Plough on ! And then the harrowing !

nkl12xtw5goz70 · 17-09-2019 01:26PM

Lady Haywire wrote: »

Aongus Von Bismarck has a challenger!

Not really.

Raconteuse · 17-09-2019 01:29PM

Probably good food and drink there though, and plants etc. There's the hardcore country stuff but then there's the Bohemian, "farming is cool crowd" now also.

Dr. Bre · 17-09-2019 01:31PM

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Ye do know that it's a drunken rampant f*ck fest?

Checks frantically for tickets online..

jimgoose · 17-09-2019 01:41PM

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Ye do know that it's a drunken rampant f*ck fest?

...with diggers? That's diggers, bee-yotch!!

EmmetSpiceland · 17-09-2019 01:42PM

Lady Haywire wrote: »

Aongus Von Bismarck has a challenger!

I’ve been compared to worst on here. Much worse.

Zane Obnoxious Cable wrote: »

Not really.

Are you that guy everyone was laughing at in the “old boardsies” thread? Haha.

jimgoose · 17-09-2019 01:47PM

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

I’ve been compared to worst on here. Much worse...

Do you know the Five Lamps?

EmmetSpiceland · 17-09-2019 01:52PM

jimgoose wrote: »

Do you know the Five Lamps?

They’re fine where they are, J!

jimgoose · 17-09-2019 01:52PM

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

They’re fine where they are, J!

Yiz can hang yizzer bollix off it!

Yakult · 17-09-2019 02:02PM

sbsquarepants wrote: »

A heap of the wolly backs in work go missing for the few days every year. The ploughing is basically the haj for culchies - they have to make the pilgrimage or they don't get to finally ride some dirty aul one in culchie heaven i believe.

There's no fúcking civilisation in them!:mad:

Better than riding a dirty aul one, on heroin from the city.

I'd rather green fields and fresh air than a river smelling like all of Dublin took a big **** in to it and a bunch of peaky blinder wanna-be's on every corner selling you dodgy heroin.

Plus people from Dublin are normally mean spirited, "cultured" knobs. This thread shows it best!

The Tetrarch · 17-09-2019 02:09PM

Mudstock.

freedominacup · 17-09-2019 02:23PM

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

How on earth is this a major “event”, drawing such big numbers? It sounds like a truly awful way to spend your day.

Tractors ploughing fields and stomping around various farming supply tents listening to yahoos shouting “hup” and “hon the banner!” or whatever parochial nickname their town/county has.

Probably has “Wagon Wheel” constantly blaring over speakers that double as bunting poles too

A few of the girls from here have been talking about it nonstop for the last month. Talking about, no word of lie, which wellies were “best” to go with their outfits. They share lots of jokes about “finding a man” and, obviously, “road frontage” and this brings them on to talk of the “Aisling” book and how they’re all so like her. All of them.

I can think of few things worse than standing around in a field with lots of old men with rope belts keeping their “trousers” up and both hands, firmly, in their pockets. Always wearing those thick suits, probably older than they are, whether it’s cold and rainy or blistering sunshine. Then having some freckled young lads in navy gilets running around bumping into you roaring “hit the diff!” and shítting themselves laughing.

I’ve had to endure spending time with my partner’s “people” out west on a few occasions and it’s always the same. Incessant weather chat, pointing out the long, or short, evenings and “‘tis an Indian summer we’re having” type pronouncements.

Then, down the pub, having to endure some of the locals from further afield. Poking fun at my accent or asking my partner if “so and so” is her uncle and on her answer in the affirmative falling around laughing telling her “Softy, we used to call him!”. Base humour.

The coverage the Ploughing is getting is beyond me. Pat Kenny was broadcasting from there today. The Dubs win “five in a row”, a feat never achieved by any other side, in either code, and one that I, personally, don’t believe will be done again, and there’s no mention of it. Instead it’s this country “festival” that’s getting all the coverage, that and the country “beef” drama.

Can’t just let us have our “moment”. Up the Dubs!!

Whatever about your description of the area your partner is from the description of the de ploughing is a bit of a caricature. Only a bit though.

On the hands never being removed from the pockets comment, a friend of my bil who has a furniture business selling fairly high end (definitely pricey) stuff took a stand at the ploughing at the height of the recession around 10 years ago. Almost a last desperate throw of the dice. Completely turned his year around and he's continued to go back every year since.

Basically the sales follow a similar pattern. Farmer gets dragged onto his stand, conversation always the same one usually carried on in hushed tones.

"I want this, you're just after lorrying out € X,000s on whatever don't even dream of telling me we can't afford something here".

As the number of zeros after the X increases he knows he's on a bigger winner.

All that said unless I'm in the market for a machine I wouldn't go across the road to it. Really awful spot.

freshpopcorn · 17-09-2019 02:29PM

Some people go for the biros and free samples.

I like sitting into the new cars(I've known people to order there news car at it.) Having a look at the machineryand looking at the foodie stalls

It's a better day out than a day to a shopping centre.

Your Face · 17-09-2019 02:32PM

I'm sure there's a ploughing joke to made about 5 in a row.

Mad_maxx · 17-09-2019 02:36PM

The ploughing is fantastic, been at least half a dozen times, only bothered to venture out to the actual ploughing once, most ignore it

The Princess Bride · 17-09-2019 02:42PM

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Some people go for the biros and free samples.

Ha!
My son went with his pals once.
Came home with about 79 bottles of that cheap orange drink aka water with sugar and orange colouring.

Jeez but he couldn't even drink the stuff, unless he wanted to dance on the ceiling for days on end!

17-09-2019 02:45PM

Anyone that says "hon" deserves to be shot with pellets of their own sh*te.

ToBeFrank123 · 17-09-2019 02:46PM

If I was a single woman (rather than a married man) I'd be down there in a flash!

All those bachelors, lots of land, plenty of road frontage, etc

Instead the single women of Ireland are wasting their time on Tinder, POF and at Electric Picnic!

Mad_maxx · 17-09-2019 02:47PM

Like most music festivals, the young punks make it their priority to block the toilets within the first half hour

Because doing that is the most hilarious thing ever

IAMAMORON · 17-09-2019 02:55PM

I think it is very important for the muckers to have something to celebrate and enjoy around harvest time. I think it is also important that city folk take good notice of this, particularly when your browsing the vegetable and fruit stands for the next couple of months. Please take the time to buy local produce and look after the farming community in this country. They work extremely hard, seven days a week, they might crib now and then, but I for one would never argue with our most noble profession. It is a great opportunity for some of our best looking queer-ones to make a few bob this week as well, good luck to all. I think it is pure and favourable that the culchies are getting an opportunity to mix and grab a bit of arse, they need this bonding, it will keep them quiet until the Shannon, Suir, Barrow and Nuir floods start before Christmas and they make their annual pilgrimage to Merrion Square to fúck a 2 year old sheep over the gate into the gardens of Dail Eireann, never an exhibition to be missed, also a very enjoyable opportunity to park a tractor outside the Burlington and stand around with their hands in their pockets spitting into the pavement before dropping a couple of hundred euro up in the posh apartments beside the river Dodder. Never miss an opportunity. People need to start drinking more Smithwicks as well, with a Guinness head, unless of course your a penny pinching Corkonian prone to going onto boards to complain about the decibel levels of gangster molls' who prefer to spend weekends in Killarney annoying stuck up boggers in health spas with foreign wives than troubling the clothes hangers of Zara and River island of a given Saturday, don't forget a change is as good as a rest you know. Gerry Adams probably is a liar.

De Ploughing

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